Staying Chaste

[mrajax]

Best of luck in your journey. If you’re anything like most people you will fail, and you will fail miserably. About four years from now you’ll probably have bedded many women, spent a lot of time intoxicated, and participated in feminist/homosexual rallies. But if you have the courage to be different, you will succeed, and you will see God face to face.

Come at me moderator. Give me your best deduction.

Dude, calm the heck down. You’re treating all this as if everyone is hostle towards you. It’s true that marriage in the end has nothing to do with finances but if I have to get married, I want to be able to financially support my wife to make my kids and her happy and secure. What, are the people who waited to marry bad people now? And while it is true you shouldn’t associate with people who are morally bankrupt, it doesn’t mean everyone is.

 

[Crux_Sacra]

David,
I have a few suggestions which I hope will help you.

1. French kissing is extremely erotic, and my advice is for you to avoid it. We are supposed to also avoid near-occasions of sin so that we are not tempted into sin. French kissing is definitely a near-occasion at least. If you continue with this behavior, you will notice your control eroding, your thoughts will turn easily to impurity, and you will slip. In my experience, from my life before my conversion, French kissing was a sure sign of greater intimacy in the near future.
2. You must also consider your girlfriend’s soul as well. If you truly love her enough to marry her, then that means you love her enough to not lead her into sin or even a near occasion of it. Your resolve may be unshakable, but hers may not be.
3. Begin thinking of chastity and constancy as freeing. Being chaste frees you to develop real relationships with people based on what they should be based on: love. You can have a relationship with this girl without physical intimacy. Physical intimacy is for the married. All of your relationships, with everyone, will improve when you embark on the path of self-mastery.
4. As Catholics we pray that we believe in the Communion of Saints. My advice is for you to avail yourself of their help. If you do not want to pray to a saint, then pray to God to send a saint or blessed to help you. Ask God to send Bl. John Paul II to help you and guide you. After all, he pretty much wrote the book on Catholic sexuality.

God bless!

 

[LINVS]

I remember being your age and I couldn’t stay chaste. It does get easier as you get older and have a wife.

My advice is tell your girlfriend that you can’t continue dating with all that affection. I don’t think it’s possible to be free of impure thoughts if you’re french kissing. If she can’t handle that or wouldn’t understand, you have to break up. Then you can start looking for a good Catholic girl who values chastity. It will take a long time, but you will save yourself a lot of Mortal Sins.

 

[Zekariya]

Different people have different ideas as to what is sin, when it concerns kissing. I won’t go into that. St Gemma Galgani is the patron saint of “those struggling with temptations to impurity and those seeking purity of heart”. You can read about her here: stgemmagalgani.com

I am 25 and don’t have a girlfriend. I really want to get married soon as well. Chastity is a hard battle for most men and today’s society doesn’t help at all. We are shown provocative images of all kinds in the media (commercials, pop-ups, adds, TV, movies, etc) and many women dress more and more provocatively these days. Twenty years ago, people did not have free access to porn on the internet (you would actually have to purchase it personally in a store ).

Prayer offered.