Sudden Death of our 13 Year Old Daughter

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MGEISING said:
18 weeks today - woke up at 3:30 - balling my eyes out … had to go down stairs so as not to wake anyone … cried for two hours straight … the pain is unbearable at times 😦
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I am keeping you and your family in my prayers. Please remember you are never alone. We are surrounding you in prayer. I pray that our Lord, and Mary will comfort you. Mary is one of the few who knows your pain.

Sincerely,

Maria1212
 
Maria1212 said:
I am keeping you and your family in my prayers. Please remember you are never alone. We are surrounding you in prayer. I pray that our Lord, and Mary will comfort you. Mary is one of the few who knows your pain.

Sincerely,

Maria1212
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God Bless you maria 1212 … and thank you … very very tough day today … just missing her with all my heart beats!
 
MGEISING said:
Hi:

Have you had your appointment? How did it go? Love MOe
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Oops, I didn’t see this post before! Anyway, we go next week. The pediatric cardiologist that we want to see has been on vacation. I did talk to another cardiologist on the phone. He said he’ll have to have surgery but we don’t know when. It could be a couple of years or even a couple of decades. It just depends on how fast the stenosis gets worse. So they’ll wait and watch. We need to keep him active and watch his cholesterol. I guess they’ll check those levels when go back next week. I have no idea what a kid’s level should be. I guess I’ll find out!

How did your day go? When I was praying for you today I randomly opened my Bible. It happened to be Romans (Romans 7:13-24 caught my eye). It really made me think about how much I hate sin. I wish I could just keep that on the forefront of my mind before I sin! God never intended life to be like this (death and illness).
May God bless you with every grace necessary to cope. Moe, I know it doesn’t ease your pain right now but your reward will be great in Heaven. God is outside of time. He can already see you there. And He’s with you now to get you there. Nothing grabs the heart of Jesus like a mourning mother. Mary said to St. Bridget that when Jesus looked into her face when he was on the cross he no longer felt his physical pain, he could only feel the pain of his mother. God loves you so much wants to ease your pain so badly. He will, He is, He’s preparing a place for you now.
 
Lorik said:
Oops, I didn’t see this post before! Anyway, we go next week. The pediatric cardiologist that we want to see has been on vacation. I did talk to another cardiologist on the phone. He said he’ll have to have surgery but we don’t know when. It could be a couple of years or even a couple of decades. It just depends on how fast the stenosis gets worse. So they’ll wait and watch. We need to keep him active and watch his cholesterol. I guess they’ll check those levels when go back next week. I have no idea what a kid’s level should be. I guess I’ll find out!

Oh good - please let me know how it goes … and I shall be praying … what is your son’s first name?

How did your day go?

**Another day I got out of bed and to work - so I guess that is good. We will have a roof over our head for another week :)/**B]

When I was praying for you today I randomly opened my Bible. It happened to be Romans (Romans 7:13-24 caught my eye). It really made me think about how much I hate sin. I wish I could just keep that on the forefront of my mind before I sin! God never intended life to be like this (death and illness).

**

Yes, sin is what gives us sadness and unhappiness … if only Adam and Eve didn’t do what they did :(**

May God bless you with every grace necessary to cope. Moe, I know it doesn’t ease your pain right now but your reward will be great in Heaven.

We literally had heaven on Earth and the reward was wonderful … now all it feels like is hell on earth … 😦

God is outside of time. He can already see you there. And He’s with you now to get you there. Nothing grabs the heart of Jesus like a mourning mother.

**I know and I must trust him and trust in his ways … We can’t explain why this happened … I know and we will have to wait until our journey is through … but it still hurts **

Mary said to St. Bridget that when Jesus looked into her face when he was on the cross he no longer felt his physical pain, he could only feel the pain of his mother.

**I believe it … knowing the person Jesus is … **

God loves you so much wants to ease your pain so badly. He will, He is, He’s preparing a place for you now.

With my luck I will be 110 before I die … and I don’t want it to be so long 😦 May God forgive me 😦
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Hi Moe, I am sorry for your loss and will put your daughter and family on my prayer list. Please read " Triumph Born of Tragedy" by Andre Thornton, 1983. Andre was a major league baseball player who lost his wife and daughter in a car wreck. This is a great book for grieving people. God Bless. Randy.
 
fire_and_ice said:
Hi Moe, I am sorry for your loss and will put your daughter and family on my prayer list. Please read " Triumph Born of Tragedy" by Andre Thornton, 1983. Andre was a major league baseball player who lost his wife and daughter in a car wreck. This is a great book for grieving people. God Bless. Randy.
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Randy:

Thank you so much - I shall purchase this book - because I have the need to know that people how have lost much — will one day feel hope … and right now – we are a hopeless family.

always,

Moe
 
His name is Anthony. Thank you very much for your prayers.
I can’t imagine what it must be like for you. Recently I heard a quote from St. Pio that has stuck with me. He said “Never ask why. Ask, what now? What am I supposed to do now?”
It’s a hard thing to do. My aunt died on 3-8-07. I know that doesn’t compare to the loss of a child. But my aunt was 54 and died as a result of a doctor giving her medicine that she couldn’t have, with a health issue that she has suffered with. My poor aunt suffered her whole life beginning with Polio at age 2. She fought so many health complications her entire life. Only to die from the mistake of a doctor. I know the doctor is only human and he didn’t do it on purpose. But there’s such a temptation to ask why. Why after battle after battle did end like that? Some things we’re just not capable of understanding. She was so kind.
So what now? I don’t know. I pray to her often. She must be a busy body in heaven b/c she’s quick to Jesus to get some of our prayers answered! I’ve asked her to pray for you, too.
It must be hell for you. But praise be to Jesus, it’s temporary.
The way you are persevering in your love for God is beautiful.
 
Being a parent who has lost a child my heart goes out to you as well as my prayers.
 
Lorik said:
His name is Anthony. Thank you very much for your prayers.

I had no doubt in my mind that his name represented a great Saint!!!

I can’t imagine what it must be like for you. Recently I heard a quote from St. Pio that has stuck with me. He said “Never ask why. Ask, what now? What am I supposed to do now?”

Very Very profound - especially for what we are going through … it is so easy to say - Why? but it takes a much holier person to say - WHAT NOW??? I am not that Holy 😦

It’s a hard thing to do. My aunt died on 3-8-07.

I am so sorry for your loss … a loss is a loss … even though I too feel a loss of a child resonates … a loss of anyone we love is painful … one - minus anything is still LESS!

I know that doesn’t compare to the loss of a child. But my aunt was 54 and died as a result of a doctor giving her medicine that she couldn’t have, with a health issue that she has suffered with. My poor aunt suffered her whole life beginning with Polio at age 2. She fought so many health complications her entire life. Only to die from the mistake of a doctor. I know the doctor is only human and he didn’t do it on purpose. But there’s such a temptation to ask why. Why after battle after battle did end like that? Some things we’re just not capable of understanding. She was so kind.
So what now? I don’t know. I pray to her often. She must be a busy body in heaven b/c she’s quick to Jesus to get some of our prayers answered! I’ve asked her to pray for you, too.

As I have to my McKayla for Anthony - although I didn’t know his name. I hope and pray that he will (and this is so selfish so please forgive me) never forget her in his prayers - now and when he reaches his vocation … I pray that McKayla will always be a part of his prayers … to me - that is truly a blessing 🙂

It must be hell for you.

Not a day went by - when we felt we had heaven on earth and we thanked God daily - that we were all brought back safely … no matter what was happening in our lives, my husband would say — AT LEAST WE HAVE EACH OTHER … now that takes on such a new meaning … we don’t … not here on earth … our girls - they were our world … and any parent will say - THERE IS NO LOVE LIKE A LOVE YOU HAVE FOR YOUR CHILD. sure you love your husband/wife, mother/father, sisters, aunts … but nothing — resonates like the love parents feel for their own child(ren). We were told we could never have children … and after many surgeries and almost a year of fertility … Amanda was born 9 years after we were married - and she was one of three … but only she survived and we felt blessed … soon after (1 yr and 9 days … our McKayla was born -one of two and we took nothing to have her … and now we have four souls in heaven … parents who desperately wanted their children … and now we are left with this unending pain… with the birth of the two girls, our heaven was completed … how, I pray to God, do we go on without her … we did have heaven on earth at Shear Bliss Farm … in Mont Vernon, NH .for 13 years… 😦

But praise be to Jesus, it’s temporary.
The way you are persevering in your love for God is beautiful.

It is all a facade … I am a wreck 24/7 … and I have to make myself get out of bed and in to my job … so we don’t lose our home … it is so hard and the pressure so great … and yet … I don’t know at times how we will make it … we miss everything about her … and it was such a senseless loss … and it hurts so very much.
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josephdavid said:
Being a parent who has lost a child my heart goes out to you as well as my prayers.
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Thank you Joseph David … and please send me a private message if you want to share with me … it is so helpful to hear from people in ‘our’ “CLUB” … to hear of the hope that perhaps one day … one day we will feel hope and happiness again. Right now - the pain is constant and at times unbearable … and we are trying to live a life … and so many people think we should be miles ahead … and it will only be 19 weeks this coming week.

The pain is as great as the first day - the only diffence is the tears don’t last as long …but the sadness and despair is constant.

People all around us, our family, friends, neighbors … have been able to continue their lives … and we are forced to just try to get out of bed every day …never mind trying to live.

Blessings to you - and I am so, so, so sorry for your loss 😦

Moe
 
There’s kind of a funny story behind his name, I totally bribed St. Anthony. When I was a couple of months pregnant, I was the manager of a kennel. I was at work and one of the employees lost a dog. The dog ran away. We all looked and looked for this dog. The one thing you don’t do at a kennel is lose someone’s dog! The owners were due in any minute to pick up this dog and I was going to have to tell them that their dog was gone. So I was in a panic and said to St. Anthony "Please, fInd this dog and if this baby is boy he will be named Anthony. I promise I’ll never even call him “Tony”, only “Anthony”. So I went outside to see if I could find the dog… I looked to my left and there the dog was, it was even digging under the fence to get back in the kennel. Not 15 minutes later the owners came back to get their Chow Chow and I knew I had an Anthony.
Right now Anthony doesn’t know much about his heart defect. After his appointment I’ll tell him more. I’ll make sure he knows what a blessing it is to know so the doctors can make sure he won’t get sick. And I’ll make sure he knows someone special is looking out for him. And I don’t know why he has it and I don’t know why McKayla (at least I believe so)is watching out for him but we know what we’re supposed to do. We’re supposed to do what the doctors say and thank McKayla by our prayers.
Moe, you’ve been through so much. Have you ever heard of an author by the name of Regina Doman? She writes Catholic childrens books. She also lost her son in a tragic accident about a year ago. Maybe she would have some advice for you on how to cope. I know nothing anyone can say can lesson your pain but perhaps she can let you know what helps her through. I don’t know if you can contact her from her son’s memorial web site or not but I know there are links to her other sites on there so there is probably an e-mail address on one of those. Maybe just think about it. Anyway here’s the link: joshua-michael.org/
 
Moe, my heart breaks for you and for those who have sadly, had to carry this heavy cross.
My daughter’s friend died yesterday in a car accident. He was 19 the day before. His brother stayed with us last night as he could not bear to be at home in his room, with his brother not next to him in his.
My heart aches. I feel so sad for the parents, for his brother that loved him dearly. Death is so hard to deal with.
These were friends of my daughters and I feel I could cry all day. Everything is tainted by this huge cloud hanging over us. So to be where you are and deal with this personally, I just can’t bear to think that people have such enormous pain and nothing to alleviate it… I am so so sorry. You must wonder when you will feel happiness again. I hope and pray with all my heart that God will comfort you and give you much needed peace in your heart. There is nothing anyone can say or do to take this away for you… that is the hardest thing for others to watch. We feel helpless. I can only offer my prayers along with everyone elses… that somewhere in all this, you may find a reason to smile again.
So, so sorry that you have to go through this heartache.
God bless you and your family. I will pray for you
 
Good morning Moe: Just dropping in to say hello and praying for you always…

Hugs, Lori
 
puppylove said:
Good morning Moe: Just dropping in to say hello and praying for you always…

Hugs, Lori
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Thanks Lori … thank you for loving me and thinking about me and reaching out to me … during this hell 😦

God’s grace and peace … you are so very very kind.

Love Moe
 
Lorik said:
There’s kind of a funny story behind his name, I totally bribed St. Anthony. When I was a couple of months pregnant, I was the manager of a kennel. I was at work and one of the employees lost a dog. The dog ran away. We all looked and looked for this dog. The one thing you don’t do at a kennel is lose someone’s dog! The owners were due in any minute to pick up this dog and I was going to have to tell them that their dog was gone. So I was in a panic and said to St. Anthony "Please, fInd this dog and if this baby is boy he will be named Anthony. I promise I’ll never even call him “Tony”, only “Anthony”. So I went outside to see if I could find the dog… I looked to my left and there the dog was, it was even digging under the fence to get back in the kennel. Not 15 minutes later the owners came back to get their Chow Chow and I knew I had an Anthony.

WHAT A GREAT STORY … I LOVE IT … WHAT A KEEPER!!!

Right now Anthony doesn’t know much about his heart defect. After his appointment I’ll tell him more. I’ll make sure he knows what a blessing it is to know so the doctors can make sure he won’t get sick. And I’ll make sure he knows someone special is looking out for him. And I don’t know why he has it and I don’t know why McKayla (at least I believe so)is watching out for him but we know what we’re supposed to do. We’re supposed to do what the doctors say and thank McKayla by our prayers.

THANK GOD THROUGH KK … FOR WE MUST MAKE SURE HE IS HONORED FOR THE GREAT GOOD - THANKS LORI … THANK YOU SO MUCH!

Moe, you’ve been through so much. Have you ever heard of an author by the name of Regina Doman? She writes Catholic childrens books. She also lost her son in a tragic accident about a year ago. Maybe she would have some advice for you on how to cope. I know nothing anyone can say can lesson your pain but perhaps she can let you know what helps her through. I don’t know if you can contact her from her son’s memorial web site or not but I know there are links to her other sites on there so there is probably an e-mail address on one of those. Maybe just think about it. Anyway here’s the link: joshua-michael.org/
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**Thank you - when I am a bit stronger I shall check it out … not sure right now is the right time for me … 19 weeks today 😦

God peace and grace - shine upon you!!!

Loving you,

Moe**
 
jules11 said:
Moe, my heart breaks for you and for those who have sadly, had to carry this heavy cross.

Thank you for your kind words and sentiment 😦

My daughter’s friend died yesterday in a car accident. He was 19 the day before. His brother stayed with us last night as he could not bear to be at home in his room, with his brother not next to him in his.

I am so very very sorry - may God be with you all … terrible news 😦

My heart aches. I feel so sad for the parents, for his brother that loved him dearly. Death is so hard to deal with.
These were friends of my daughters and I feel I could cry all day. Everything is tainted by this huge cloud hanging over us. So to be where you are and deal with this personally, I just can’t bear to think that people have such enormous pain and nothing to alleviate it… I am so so sorry. You must wonder when you will feel happiness again. I hope and pray with all my heart that God will comfort you and give you much needed peace in your heart. There is nothing anyone can say or do to take this away for you… that is the hardest thing for others to watch. We feel helpless.

Thanks so much - that helps - it truly does … sadness is every bit a part of our landscape as breathing your next breathe. We desperately need to know how to live with this new ‘reality’ … we haven’t been too successful yet … but by God’s grace and prayers from wonderful people like you — offering prayers … it is such an unbelievable start … thank you with every breath that I take!

I can only offer my prayers along with everyone elses… that somewhere in all this, you may find a reason to smile again.
So, so sorry that you have to go through this heartache.
God bless you and your family. I will pray for you
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**You are the best and again - many thanks from a lonely McKayla’s mom in NH … God’s peace and grace abound and may he shine his light upon you and yours.

Love Moe**
 
I’m always thinking about you Moe… especially when I go to bed at night and say my rosary…

Hugs, Lori
 
puppylove said:
I’m always thinking about you Moe… especially when I go to bed at night and say my rosary…

Hugs, Lori
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**Thanks Lori - what would I do without you - seriously … I am able to get out of bed because of my friends who are praying for me. I would just assume stay in bed - curled up and pray the world away … but it can’t be like that.

Loving you always Lori… Moe**
 
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