Isn’t that what all parishes are supposed to be, a community? A community of people with common interests coming together to help themselves and in turn others? Your post appears it is either one or the other, that to have community you need to not have rules. Parishes are more than just the masses, responsibilities go beyond the priest, he cannot do everything alone all the time. Parish communities are people who are inspired by what they hear every week to take the weekly or daily readings beyond the building walls to others. A Pentacost-like renewal every week.
Focusing only on the rules and negatives of the outside world (a neo-anti-Catholic-persecution-like complex is what it appeared to be like, which was out of touch with the changes of acceptance with other denominations over the years) week after week after week… like I experienced with others does not bring about a Pentacost-like renewal, it chills hearts, creates apathy and indifference, it is not a trait of a good shepard. He is not tending to the mustard seeds, but leaving them sit on the hard, rocky ground.