The church finally says ABC is ok!! What would you all think of that??

[Mary_Gail_36]

Accept it of course!

Good! Just reasons very from couple to couple. An unjust reason might be, I don’t want to gain weight…ala Scarlet O’Hara.

 

[Debora123]

and here is a woman who has done right by God by even saving herself for marriage.

Thank you for sharing.

Haha, I know, right? And yet I come to threads like these and get nothing but condemnation.

It’s ok.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

259 responses to an OP that is totally absurd?



Why?

 

[Mary_Gail_36]

All my life I’ve fully intended on using NFP, even though I didn’t understand it or agree with it. While I was engaged, my husband and I paid for NFP classes and spent $500 on an NFP machine for the extra assistance. We did everything right. We dated for 4 years before getting married, we saved ourselves for marriage, and we followed all the rules. We prayed the rosary together, went to Church weekly together, etc etc.

We tried NFP, and it ended up causing a lot of problems for us, for reasons I will not get into (though I’m sure people will speculate and accuse me of things that aren’t even true). After much prayer, discernment, and even our priest’s blessing, we decided to go ahead and use condoms. It has helped us tremendously and solved the problems we were having before. NFP simply did not work for us and hurt our marriage.

May I ask which classes you took, NFP wise? Maybe a different method of NFP would be more user friendly?

I confess, I never thought I would obey the Church.

We used condoms as well. We stopped when my OB had me upgrade to the pill. The reason was according to her were condoms were more for casual sex, and don’t work as well in a long term relationship. She sited more chance of user error

Although, we never conceived using condoms…they failed frequently.

 

[Bookcat]

The ends do not justify the means.

 

[LaSainte]

So what you quoted here:

The conjugal act has a twofold meaning: unitive (the mutual self-giving of the spouses) and procreative (an openness to the transmission of life). No one may break the inseparable connection which God has established between these two meanings of the conjugal act by excluding one or the other of them.

Is not disrupted by the man ejaculating somewhere else so long as he semen make it to the right place during the totality of the act.

So you and others might find the idea unsavory, but I fail to see how it is against the teachings of he Church.

 

[Debora123]

May I ask which classes you took, NFP wise? Maybe a different method of NFP would be more user friendly?

I confess, I never thought I would obey the Church.

We used condoms as well. We stopped when my OB had me upgrade to the pill. The reason was according to her were condoms were more for casual sex, and don’t work as well in a long term relationship. She sited more chance of user error

Although, we never conceived using condoms…they failed frequently.

They taught us the sympto-thermal method in the classes I took. We bought the NFP machine to help with charting. raxmedical.com/ladycomp.php

I truly was determined to make this work.

I’m not someone who just got lazy or who never tried or didn’t care about Church teaching.

 

[Debora123]

May I ask which classes you took, NFP wise? Maybe a different method of NFP would be more user friendly?

I confess, I never thought I would obey the Church.

We used condoms as well. We stopped when my OB had me upgrade to the pill. The reason was according to her were condoms were more for casual sex, and don’t work as well in a long term relationship. She sited more chance of user error

Although, we never conceived using condoms…they failed frequently.

Oh no, I would never take the pill. It kills babies.

I would never use anything that could cause harm to my child. Condoms are all I would ever use and I only use them on my fertile days. (I still do all the NFP charting and everything and don’t use any protection on my infertile days). I am still open to life, although I know the Catholic definition of it would say otherwise.

 

[Jennifer_J]

So what you quoted here:

Is not disrupted by the man ejaculating somewhere else so long as he semen make it to the right place during the totality of the act.

So you and others might find the idea unsavory, but I fail to see how it is against the teachings of he Church.

You keep saying this and to be honest, I don’t understand how it would be accomplished. I’ve been married 17 years, have 6 children with 1 on the way, and just have no idea . I probably don’t WANT to know what you mean though…

 

[Jennifer_J]

Oh no, I would never take the pill. It kills babies.

I would never use anything that could cause harm to my child. Condoms are all I would ever use and I only use them on my fertile days. (I still do all the NFP charting and everything and don’t use any protection on my infertile days). I am still open to life, although I know the Catholic definition of it would say otherwise.

This is a bit strange, too. If you know when you are fertile and infertile, is it so hard to just abstain on the fertile days. Don’t feel you have to share the info, it just seems strange.

 

[Debora123]

This is a bit strange, too. If you know when you are fertile and infertile, is it so hard to just abstain on the fertile days. Don’t feel you have to share the info, it just seems strange.

It can seem strange to an outsider, I am sure.

I also thought it wouldn’t be harmful in any way when I spent all that time and money investing on it. I was wrong.

 

[Mary_Gail_36]

You keep saying this and to be honest, I don’t understand how it would be accomplished. I’ve been married 17 years, have 6 children with 1 on the way, and just have no idea . I probably don’t WANT to know what you mean though…

Jennifer you made me smile…I was pondering the same thing.

 

[Mary_Gail_36]

Oh no, I would never take the pill. It kills babies.

I would never use anything that could cause harm to my child. Condoms are all I would ever use and I only use them on my fertile days. (I still do all the NFP charting and everything and don’t use any protection on my infertile days). I am still open to life, although I know the Catholic definition of it would say otherwise.

Do you know what a contact pregnancy is? If you have fertile mucus, you can conceive through any genital contact. I think you might be giving yourself a false sense of security.

 

[Debora123]

Do you know what a contact pregnancy is? If you have fertile mucus, you can conceive through any genital contact. I think you might be giving yourself a false sense of security.

Isn’t contact pregnancy when you can get pregnant without full intercourse?

Forgive me, but I don’t know how this applies to me…

 

[Jennifer_J]

Isn’t contact pregnancy when you can get pregnant without full intercourse?

Forgive me, but I don’t know how this applies to me…

I think what she means is, sex during your fertile time with a condom is still pretty risky. I think even the Take Charge of Your Fertility book (Toni Welscher?) says this. Any sperm that escape the condom when you have fertile mucous have a good chance at making it to the egg.

 

[Debora123]

I think what she means is, sex during your fertile time with a condom is still pretty risky. I think even the Take Charge of Your Fertility book (Toni Welscher?) says this. Any sperm that escape the condom when you have fertile mucous have a good chance at making it to the egg.

Correct use of condoms have about a 2% failure rate.

I’ll take my chances and leave it at the hands of God. Call it part of my openness to life.

 

[Sullibe]

Well then, I willl be quite honest in admitting that I have 2 children and never want another one. Is that a just reason. If not, I would be using NFP for unjust reasons in which case I may as well use contraception.

The question you have to ask yourself, is WHY do you “never” want another one. No you, don’t have to answer to me, or on this forum… only to God. But the answer to that “why”, will be answer your question if it’s a just reason.

If it’s not a just reason, then yes, I suppose you could use contraception in place of NFP (though there is a variance of degrees while both are sinful, one is a mortal sin and one is not), and it’s your choice to make, but choices have consequences both short term, and long term. As a Catholic, I’m sure you understand that part of the consequences to your actions will be, being held accountable to God for those choices.

 

[Debora123]

The question you have to ask yourself, is WHY do you “never” want another one. No you, don’t have to answer to me, or on this forum… only to God. But the answer to that “why”, will be answer your question if it’s a just reason.

If it’s not a just reason, then yes, I suppose you could use contraception in place of NFP (though there is a variance of degrees while both are sinful, one is a mortal sin and one is not), and it’s your choice to make, but choices have consequences both short term, and long term. As a Catholic, I’m sure you understand that part of the consequences to your actions will be, being held accountable to God for those choices.

She’s talked about this in another thread - or maybe it was earlier on in this one.

Some people simply don’t WANT to have 6 children. They aren’t FIT for it. It isn’t their thing.

She has 2 children she is happy with and finds that to be enough for her personally.

Everyone is different.

 

[Sullibe]

Correct use of condoms have about a 2% failure rate.

I’ll take my chances and leave it at the hands of God. Call it part of my openness to life.

But why?

I know it’s none of my business, so please don’t feel obligated to answer, but why are you trying to avoid pregnancy?
Serious health or financial reasons?

I don’t really want to pry, but you seem so adamant in trying to prove that NFP is just as contraceptive in nature as ABC, almost like you trying to make yourself feel better about using condoms to prevent pregnancy, that you’re completely missing the point.

You’re approaching NFP purely from a contraceptive mentality. You use condoms with a contraceptive mentality and then you are trying to justify that mentality by attempting to prove that NFP, when used to postpone pregnancy by abstaining from sex on fertile days, is equally contraceptive, especially when used for non-just reasons. Of course people use NFP with a contraceptive mentality, but that doesn’t make it right. It just means people are sinners, and makes them wrong. Majority doesn’t rule in matters of morality.

 

[Corki]

She’s talked about this in another thread - or maybe it was earlier on in this one.

Some people simply don’t WANT to have 6 children. They aren’t FIT for it. It isn’t their thing.

She has 2 children she is happy with and finds that to be enough for her personally.

Everyone is different.

Gee and everyone knows that right after 2 comes 6!