The infamous "I was raised Catholic" statement

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I’ve had more than one friend say to me, when prompted with careful language regarding religion, “I was raised Catholic.”

I usually take this to be code language for “I am not a practicing Catholic.” 😦

How do you handle this? Do you say anything in response? Whenever I hear this I just drop the subject since I can’t really see it going anywhere. I would appreciate any wisdom you might have on this matter. One must be careful about getting in someone’s face about it, so I wouldn’t say “Oh, so you don’t go to church anymore?” Is there some gentle way of broaching this subject with friends? :confused: :hmmm:
 
I think I’d start by gently asking, “What does that mean?” It probably means exactly what you think it does, but there may be underlying doubts, confusion, etc. that might come to light when you ask further. This is the point where you can get more specific with questions - and answers. You never know what you might spark. It’s definitely a sensitive situation that requires you to feel your way step by step, but I don’t think most people would be offended or put off by a low-key pursuit of the subject. Hopefully this would, at least in some cases, lead to deeper discussion - and if it leads even one person back home, it was worth it! 🙂
 
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ktm:
How do you handle this? Do you say anything in response?
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I’d say, “Are you currently practicing your faith?”
 
I have many personal experiences with these. My Mom and two half-sisters were all raised Catholic yet rebelled against the faith long before I was born (I wasn’t raised Catholic). Whenever they try to attack my faith, they always justify their anti-catholicism with “I was raised Catholic” they also use this statement as sufficient proof that they know all about Catholicism. However, I find more often than not they have no clue what they are talking about.
 
Some teacher said that to me once in a conversation. I asked them if they felt their education they had the first eight grades gave them enough information to teach high school algebra. They replied no. Then I asked why they felt their scant CCD formation in grade school gave them enough information to be a practicing adult Catholic. No answer to that one.
 
I usually respond with oh thats great. I go to the 11 o’clock Mass if you ever want to go again, I’ll love to go with you.

This gives an opening for positive dialogue if they so choose. Sometimes people have said no thanks, others I’d like that and others still have said I left the church because…(fill in the blank). I will respond honestly and gently. If it is the lies she teaches I tell them the Scripture that the church is the pillar of truth. or if you wish to discuss it, I know in my studies I have only found the truth of God as set out in the Scriptures. Most of the people I run into are now in fundamental groups so usually Biblical responses are most appropriate. But the opening has worked for me for all types.
God Bless
 
Hmmm so I guess the other option I was considering, that of saying, “Get thee behind me, Satan!” might not be a good choice…
 
I’ve tried the humorous approach. It usually relaxes the atmosphere and provides the opening if the person is willing to discuss it.

“I’m a practicing Catholic. The reason I’m practicing is that I’m not all that good at it yet. But I’m getting better.”

But, of course, I’ve only been Catholic about one year, so I have an excuse for needing the practice.:whacky:
 
When someone says that they were “raised Catholic” it does not necessarily mean that they are now a “fallen away” Catholic.

I was “raised Catholic,” and educated in a Catholic elementary school (Nuns) and high school (Brothers of Mary). I left the Church in my younger years, and then came back. Which goes to show there is truth in the scripture that says if you raise up a child in the way he should go, he will not depart from it. Now a lot of factors can indeed alter that statement, but it is nonetheless very good advice.

When I tell someone that I was “raised Catholic” it is a statement that I now make with pride and gratitude (yes, I know, pride CAN be a deadly sin!).

If only those Nuns and Brothers knew how much their hard lessons saved me from destruction later in life! I thank God every day that my parents gave me a Catholic education.

Now I know Catholic schools today are very seldom run by religious orders like they were in the 1950’s, but they are still one of the most valuable resources the Church has for “defending and preserving the Faith.”

Dear Catholic parents, PLEASE, get your children out of the public schools if at all possible. Support the creation and maintenance of Catholic schools in your diocese. It can make all the difference in the world!

God Bless,
 
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ktm:
I’ve had more than one friend say to me, when prompted with careful language regarding religion, "I was raised Catholic…"How do you handle this? Do you say anything in response?
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Anyone who doesn’t know me would assume I am Catholic. I have a name is that is about as Catholic as you can get, and I look very, very Irish. My wife and kids are Catholic, and it’s easy for people to make the assumption.

It is not a correct assumption. If I am asked, I usually give an answer like the one KTM uses, just because I do not choose to make my religious beliefs (or lack thereof) part of a conversation with a person I am not close to, nor do I wish to take credit for being a Catholic when I am not.

Any further pushing is met with some form of “Mind your own business” that varies in politeness depending on my mood. I use “I was raised Catholic” with the intent of stopping a conversation, not starting one.
 
I notice that some converts disparage those “raised catholic” as if being raised catholic means that the faith of those raised catholic is somehow less considered or less real.

Consider that there may be something to be said for those that have stuck it out as catholics despite being more aware of the totality of being catholic.

To remain catholic while being aware, worts and all , of the church can require more discipline than those that may have fled some other faith to become catholic.

Peace
 
Auberon Quin:
Anyone who doesn’t know me would assume I am Catholic. I have a name is that is about as Catholic as you can get, and I look very, very Irish. My wife and kids are Catholic, and it’s easy for people to make the assumption.

It is not a correct assumption. If I am asked, I usually give an answer like the one KTM uses, just because I do not choose to make my religious beliefs (or lack thereof) part of a conversation with a person I am not close to, nor do I wish to take credit for being a Catholic when I am not.

Any further pushing is met with some form of “Mind your own business” that varies in politeness depending on my mood. I use “I was raised Catholic” with the intent of stopping a conversation, not starting one.
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I was ok with everything until the last sentence… :cool:
 
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Tanais:
I have many personal experiences with these. My Mom and two half-sisters were all raised Catholic yet rebelled against the faith long before I was born (I wasn’t raised Catholic). Whenever they try to attack my faith, they always justify their anti-catholicism with “I was raised Catholic” they also use this statement as sufficient proof that they know all about Catholicism. However, I find more often than not they have no clue what they are talking about.
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Amen. You can usually assume:
  1. That they were probably raised in a “nominally” Catholic home, although this is not always the case;
  2. That they do not have a clear understanding of the faith;
  3. That they are using the phrase to cut off all questioning regarding their understanding of the faith;
  4. That they are not practising the Catholic faith (most people who were “raised Catholic” and are still “practicing Catholics” refer to themselves as “cradle Catholics”);
  5. That they do not want to discuss the issue of their faith (see Quin’s explanation, below).Sometimes I ignore #5 and try to eplore the issue, and I’m usually met with great resistance. In most cases, the “raised Catholic” cites birth control and abortion as the reasons they no longer consider themselves Catholic.
I’ve yet to meet a “raised Catholic” who left the Church because of the “statue worship” or “Mary worship” or “praying to dead people.” They acquire those reasons after they leave. 😉
 
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ricatholic:
I notice that some converts disparage those “raised catholic” as if being raised catholic means that the faith of those raised catholic is somehow less considered or less real.

Consider that there may be something to be said for those that have stuck it out as catholics despite being more aware of the totality of being catholic.

To remain catholic while being aware, worts and all , of the church can require more discipline than those that may have fled some other faith to become catholic.

Peace
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i have a great deal of respect for those cradle catholics that have managed to fight the good fight, and run the race, and manage to hold on… sometimes by their finger nails… it’s hard to answer all the questions (because we don’t know all the answers) and there are some pretty savvy people throwing questions that are sometimes pretty convincing… but, i do believe for those that try the holy ghost gives extra grace to hang on… and hang on they will, for i believe that they are the backbone of the catholic church and they are solid… Solid as a Rock… 👍
 
The Barrister:
Amen. You can usually assume:
  1. That they were probably raised in a “nominally” Catholic home, although this is not always the case;
  2. That they do not have a clear understanding of the faith;
  3. That they are using the phrase to cut off all questioning regarding their understanding of the faith;
  4. That they are not practising the Catholic faith (most people who were “raised Catholic” and are still “practicing Catholics” refer to themselves as “cradle Catholics”);
  5. That they do not want to discuss the issue of their faith (see Quin’s explanation, below).
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I’ll give you 3-5; 1 and 2, not so much. Of course, #2 may be purely definitional. If you believe that anyone who truly understands Catholicism would never leave, then anyone who left must not have understood Catholicism.

“Cradle Catholic” is an odd term. Despite 16 years of Catholic schools, association and close friendships with tons of Catholics, and regular Mass attendance for a long time, I never heard the term until I came to this forum.
 
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Tanais:
I have many personal experiences with these. My Mom and two half-sisters were all raised Catholic yet rebelled against the faith long before I was born (I wasn’t raised Catholic). Whenever they try to attack my faith, they always justify their anti-catholicism with “I was raised Catholic” they also use this statement as sufficient proof that they know all about Catholicism. However, I find more often than not they have no clue what they are talking about.
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My favorite comeback on that one is: "Well, I was formed for nine months in the womb of my Catholic mother. I don’t remember a thing about it though. Eventually I was expected to learn something, besides baby things.

“Great starts take growth, study, application and maturity to make a person into a human being. The same goes for being raised Catholic. Mother’s milk is only good for a few months. We are expected to mature and grow in life and faith after childhood. It is not about the first few years of life. It is Eternal Life and getting there with perseverance and knowledge and learning. Children’s experiences don’t count for much.” :hmmm:

Of course tone of voice and body language is important in the delivery of that little comeback. I keep it light and friendly which is how I feel about it. I know they got lost along a curve in the road somewhere. It is just a comment to plant a seed, not condemn anyone.
 
The Barrister:
Amen. You can usually assume:
  1. That they were probably raised in a “nominally” Catholic home, although this is not always the case;
  2. That they do not have a clear understanding of the faith;
  3. That they are using the phrase to cut off all questioning regarding their understanding of the faith;
  4. That they are not practising the Catholic faith (most people who were “raised Catholic” and are still “practicing Catholics” refer to themselves as “cradle Catholics”);
  5. That they do not want to discuss the issue of their faith (see Quin’s explanation, below).
    Sometimes I ignore #5 and try to eplore the issue, and I’m usually met with great resistance. In most cases, the “raised Catholic” cites birth control and abortion as the reasons they no longer consider themselves Catholic.
I’ve yet to meet a “raised Catholic” who left the Church because of the “statue worship” or “Mary worship” or “praying to dead people.” They acquire those reasons after they leave. 😉
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Barrister, I think that you make some assumptions that are a little wayward. Specifically your claim that birth control AND abortion is the most reason in most cases why they do not consider themselves catholic.

These are two separate issues and while most catholics believe that ABC is OK, that is not the case for abortion.

Another issue that must rank very high is that people leave the church because of the actions of the church’s leaders. This is more troubling than those that have become secularized, because in some cases, there is a feeling that the actions of the church’s leaders betray the teachings of Jesus. I think there has been an increase in this reason lately and it is seen as a reasonable response by some.

As for your comment about understanding the faith, there are some who have left the church and while they may feel they understand the message of Jesus, they do not understand that the church’s leaders does not have to live that message as a requirement for the institution to remain the deposit of the faith.

Peace
 
Auberon Quin:
I’ll give you 3-5; 1 and 2, not so much. Of course, #2 may be purely definitional. If you believe that anyone who truly understands Catholicism would never leave, then anyone who left must not have understood Catholicism.

“Cradle Catholic” is an odd term. Despite 16 years of Catholic schools, association and close friendships with tons of Catholics, and regular Mass attendance for a long time, I never heard the term until I came to this forum.
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re: “cradle Catholic” - I’ve heard the term outside this forum, and I’ve also heard other language that means the same thing, or no reference at all. Essentially, the idea I was conveying is that those who are still Catholic rarely/never use the phrase “I was raised Catholic” in response to any question.
 
I usually get that dreaded statement from ‘adults’ when I am speaking about my faith. It’s variation being “I am a recovering Catholic” (Which almost resulted badly and ended with me walking away to ask God for patience).

I am a recovered (not recovering) Catholic, meaning, I was indeed raised Catholic, turned away, and then saw the light. I did some time as a protostant, found it lacking and then found what I was missing in the sacraments. In the meantime thought I had managed to become a part of a protostant community. I had figured that since they were nondenominational, that it was the same as ecuminical. I was wrong. Often I find myself under attack from well meaning ND Christians who think that they need to save me from my faith. When it comes to my age demographic I can usually show them that Catholicism is in fact Christianity and in fact the very thing protostants were protesting is the Church. It is the older demographic of “Born Again” and “Saved” fundamentalists who try and back me into a corner. They seem to think I will have little to argue due to my age. I let them speak their peice and then I begin my responce, to which I am usually cut short by " I was raised Catholic." As though that means they know something I do not.
I let this hang in the air a moment just in case they have somthing to add to that, usually they do not. Then it is my turn. I smile sweetly and tell them that while they may have been raised Catholic, that does not mean they were in fact Catholic, much in the sense that being raised by wolves does not make a human a wolf. I tell them that I am still Catholic and that I am a Christian. And that since I can not turn my back on my faith I will remain a Catholic. I then ask them why it is that they left the Church. Usually the answer is that their family didn’t teach them how to live… I think that these are the results of those kids who are forced to go to church only on holidays, some one hands them a Chick tract and they think they are hearing something they never heard before. (Usually it is the lies they have never heard before.)
When I tell people I am Catholic, they seem to think that I think it is the building I worship in that saves me. I like being able to tell them that I was lucky enough to be raised Catholic, not just sent to church. Every aspect of my life has been influenced by my faith, and I am happy to say, “I was raised Catholic.”
 
The Barrister:
re: “cradle Catholic” - I’ve heard the term outside this forum, and I’ve also heard other language that means the same thing, or no reference at all. Essentially, the idea I was conveying is that those who are still Catholic rarely/never use the phrase “I was raised Catholic” in response to any question.
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I am a cradle Catholic, went to a Catholic School but it wasn’t until I was 30 years old that I found out I was not raised Catholic. But the good news it I’m Catholic NOW!
:amen:
 
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