The Value of Virginity for Marriage

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I have got into the dating seen and am wondering about something. I read in the Old Testament that if a man and women were to engage in sexual intercourse before marriage they had to be married. I am a virgin and have no intention of giving it away without it being with in the confines of marriage. My question is, let’s say I meet a girl who is not, but she’s had a conversion back to God. I would like to marry her, but would she actually be my wife? The reason I ask is because the Old Testament laws have not been thrown by the way side and personally it feels like she belongs to someone else. In addition since she has given her self away could she actually give herself fully to me as I would to her. I was told no by a very influential theology teacher that she could never give herself fully to you. Every time you give yourself away you lose a piece of yourself. I won’t go into to much details about the theology teacher, but I will say he is the real deal. Honestly I wouldn’t want to marry someone who isn’t a virgin, just seems there could be a lot of problems otherwise and the divorce numbers aren’t very good either.

I know the forums are coming to a close and I would personally like to thank everyone who has helped me over the years from this place. God Bless you all and Merry Christmas.
 
Atruthseeker2.0 said:
I was told no by a very influential theology teacher that she could never give herself fully to you.
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Hmm, this makes me kinda suspicious…

They wouldn’t happen to call themselves “trad” or think TLM is inherently superior, right? These ideas sound very conservative and typically such beliefs also come with a heaping helping of anti-OF propoganda.
 
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No he attend norvus ordo with the rest of the High School. But it does make sense, think about it. Every time a brand car is used by a different owner it loses value because more then one person has used it. The full retail price goes down each time.
 
Atruthseeker2.0 said:
I have got into the dating seen and am wondering about something. I read in the Old Testament that if a man and women were to engage in sexual intercourse before marriage they had to be married. I am a virgin and have no intention of giving it away without it being with in the confines of marriage. My question is, let’s say I meet a girl who is not, but she’s had a conversion back to God. I would like to marry her, but would she actually be my wife? The reason I ask is because the Old Testament laws have not been thrown by the way side and personally it feels like she belongs to someone else. In addition since she has given her self away could she actually give herself fully to me as I would to her. I was told no by a very influential theology teacher that she could never give herself fully to you. Every time you give yourself away you lose a piece of yourself. I won’t go into to much details about the theology teacher, but I will say he is the real deal. Honestly I wouldn’t want to marry someone who isn’t a virgin, just seems there could be a lot of problems otherwise and the divorce numbers aren’t very good either.

I know the forums are coming to a close and I would personally like to thank everyone who has helped me over the years from this place. God Bless you all and Merry Christmas.
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Who is or isn’t married is based on The Law. Whether it’s Canon Law, Jewish Law, Baptist Church ordinances, etc.

In the OT, when a couple engaged in premarital sex, the law commended them to get married. But the law did not automatically marry them.

However, when Christ came, marriage was raised to a Sacrament for the Baptized. Therefore, the Church does not want a couple to get married lightly, even if the couple is fornicating.

I hope you can see the difference.
 
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Atruthseeker2.0 said:
No he attend norvus ordo with the rest of the High School.
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Oh, so he’s a high school student?

Yeah, forget what he’s telling you. He’s probably wrong and pompous about it like every other high school student in existence. Listen to Bishops and Priests on matters like this.
Atruthseeker2.0 said:
Every time a brand car is used by a different owner it loses value because more then one person has used it.
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Humans are not cars.
 
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Wasn’t the punishment serious if they weren’t married. Honestly that’s not my issue, it feels like this person would belong to someone else.
 
I still don’t like it. Sex isn’t like driving a car and giving yourself to someone isn’t something you can only do once. This fetishism around virginity is really disturbing and a relic of a bygone era of misogyny and prudishness.

You’re not broken if you’re not a virgin.
 
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Yes but whos Purity is greater St. Mary Magdalene or St. Jospeh’s. Obviously St. Joseph since we repeat at Holy mass, most chased spouse.
 
Atruthseeker2.0 said:
Every time a brand car is used by a different owner it loses value because more then one person has used it. The full retail price goes down each time.
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A spouse is not a possession like a car. We don’t think of human beings like commodities that lose or retain value.

This feels troll to me.
 
Atruthseeker2.0 said:
Wasn’t the punishment serious if they weren’t married. Honestly that’s not my issue, it feels like this person would belong to someone else.
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Yes, but that wasn’t the Divine Law. That was human law. The Divine Law is simply that fornication is a grave sin.
 
Atruthseeker2.0 said:
Yes but whos Purity is greater St. Mary Magdalene or St. Jospeh’s.
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Uhh, neither, because they’ve both been purified by God. I don’t see the point.

Besides, we don’t know if St. Joseph was even a virgin.
 
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That’s out of line. Delete your post unless you wanna get banned. Statements like that aren’t welcome here.
 
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Actually we do, know St. Joseph was indeed a virgin since he never married before meeting, the Blessed Mother.
 
I can’t give you a catholic answer to this, just a personal one. I’m female and my husband and I have been married for 48 years. I was not a virgin when we married and he was. It made no difference to either of us. We married each other and that includes any baggage one brings to marriage. Virginity seems important to some people so, for them, perhaps it’s best if they seek out another virgin lest they fixate on it for the rest of their lives.

Virginity is lost after marriage anyway. It’s a one time condition. Two people joining their lives together has many more important conditions, conflicts and hassles. The marriage bed isn’t the most important thing unless you make it so. I’m now 68 years old and our status on our wedding night is so far in the past that I barely remember it! I remember the wedding ceremony more than the wedding night.

It’s up to each individual to determine how important virgin status is how forgiven anyone is for their past sins. You either accept that they were forgiven or you don’t, correct? If God washes one clean again after confession, should you do any less?
 
There are various traditions on St. Joseph, some are that he was a widower, others that he was a young man not too much older than Our Lady.

I tend to prefer youthful St. Joseph.
 
Atruthseeker2.0 said:
Actually we do, know St. Joseph was indeed a virgin since he never married before meeting, the Blessed Mother.
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That’s not dogma. That’s your personal opinion.
F_Marturana said:
There are various traditions on St. Joseph, some are that he was a widower, others that he was a young man not too much older than Our Lady.

I tend to prefer youthful St. Joseph.
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Youthful widower seems to make sense, maybe late 20s to mid 30s. Had a wife who passed but he’d established himself as an upstanding man in the community, someone Mary’s parents would trust. In any case, it’s not known.
 
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Look dude all I am trying to find is the answer to a question. Yet no one has answered it. I was literally told I was a troll when it seriously bothering me.
 
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