This is why I'll never send my kids to public school

[Debora123]

It is just frustrating to see all of one type of schooling painted with the same brush. Homeschooled kids are all anti-social, private-schoolers are all snobs and public schoolers are all secular. None of those are true. Individual schools should be judged individually and examined on how they will best fit within the needs of individual families or kids. No more of this never send your kids to public school or they will loose their faith.

 

[ricofall]

After reading these post, I have to chime in.
First I am a parent of two wonderful daughters and counting. I am also a…wait for it…Public School Teacher eek at the high school level. FYI: I did go to both Catholic School and Public School.

First, parents are the most important element to child’s life. I have seen what broken homes, absent parents, and abuse does to students.

Second, trying to become a parent when the child is already 15+ is hard to do. They really do not have to listen to you anymore. You cannot ‘make’ them do anything. So parents do the next best thing. They blame the teacher. For the record, I am not a perfect teacher. I tell that to my students. So let me give you an example of how I get blamed.

Student ‘Ted’ (19 year old 10th grader) starts skipping my class and has constant bad behavior. I call mom. Mom is made aware of the situation. Student continues with behavior. Mom finds out that he still has been doing this because the school calls a meeting and removes him from my class. Mom then calls me irate and asked why I did not tell her again that her son was missing school again. I responded that she parent access to his grades and attendance…Wow, you might as well as thought that I insulted her. She told me she does not have the time look at that and it is my job to inform her. Anyways, she hung up on me. She fought with the school to get her son back into my program. Only to have the school remove him again a few days later for holding his door open in the parking lot while exiting the school. Seriously, he was a passenger in a truck and he was holding his door open and did not close it until the first red light on the street!

It is hard for me to work with a student when the parent is not being a parent. Sadly, I get this every year. However, I also get wonderful students who’s parents are involved (however not too involved). Rarely do I have any concerns with them. I see the actual results different types of parenting. I do know that no parent is perfect, but the more involved parent usually has the more successful student.

Why does all of the matter? Because usually in private schools, parents are involved in students education. They play an active role and children know that. Therefore the school usually has better students overall. The teacher has more authority (however usually less pay) and is able to manage class better.

So personally, I believe that the parents are the most important teacher in a child’s life. It really does not matter where you want them to go to school as long as the school is a good school. Many parents however try to hedge their bets, so to speak, and pick a school that complements their life and faith.

 

[Jordan719]

Why don’t you want your kids to go to college or to get married if you did both?

Also, if your sons DON’T want to become priests, how do you expect them to be able to support 12 children plus a full time stay at home mom with the salary of a plumber or pipe fitter who doesn’t have more than a high school diploma?? (I know you well enough to know you think couples should all have 12 children and wives shouldn’t have jobs apart from being stay at home moms)

I know plenty of people who went to college and stayed in dorm rooms and never smoked pot once in their life.

It is not what I want, but what God wants for them. We pray daily that we raise our children according to God’s will. In doing so, we hear almost daily that our children will become priests. If it be God’s will, so be it. I will love them whether they go to college or not, get married or not. However, that isn’t the “norm”. Everyone is called to the vocation of the religious life, we must listen to see whether God instead calls us to the vocation of marriage.

One could very easily support twelve children on a pipe fitters salary, at least around here. A union pipe fitter easily makes upwards of $100,000 per year. One doesn’t need to provide each child with a car, phone, new clothes, ect. though.

I do believe that many couples are not open to God’s will and attempt to manipulate His plan in order to allow themselves the material things of this world.

I have missed arguing with you.

 

[Jordan719]

“I do believe that many couples are not open to God’s will and attempt to manipulate His plan in order to allow themselves the material things of this world.”

The reason I say this is because we did for a very long time while claiming to follow our Lord.

 

[Debora123]

It is not what I want, but what God wants for them. We pray daily that we raise our children according to God’s will. In doing so, we hear almost daily that our children will become priests. If it be God’s will, so be it. I will love them whether they go to college or not, get married or not. However, that isn’t the “norm”. Everyone is called to the vocation of the religious life, we must listen to see whether God instead calls us to the vocation of marriage.

One could very easily support twelve children on a pipe fitters salary, at least around here. A union pipe fitter easily makes upwards of $100,000 per year. One doesn’t need to provide each child with a car, phone, new clothes, ect. though.

I do believe that many couples are not open to God’s will and attempt to manipulate His plan in order to allow themselves the material things of this world.

I have missed arguing with you.

Ah I see. You made it sound like you wanted or expected them to be priests when you said this:

Our oldest will likely become a religious brother, and prayerfully the others priests. One can pray.

And considering all 3 of your sons are still very very young (I know they are all under the age of 10, one still being an infant), it sounded like a pretty bold statement to make, saying they would “most likely” become priests and that you’d “pray” for them to become priests. That is a decision that should be made between them and God when they are older.

Interesting that you would claim a pipe fitter would make that much money. My dad is an engineer and has been with his company for almost 30 years, now holding a manager position… and HE doesn’t even make 100k a year. None of us had a car, new clothes, or a cell phone unless we paid for it ourselves.

 

[Mrs_Sally]

We homeschool our children for this very reason. We will not push college on the children either, it isn’t necessary. Our oldest will likely become a religious brother, and prayerfully the others priests. One can pray.
If God doesn’t call them to the priesthood, their is always the different trades (pipe fitter, plumber, mechanic, ect. ) Not everyone will be in a dorm room at an ivy league school smoking marijuana.

And priests don’t need college?? Most diocese and orders won’t accept a man for priesthood who doesn’t already have a college degree. And just because someone is a religious brother doesn’t mean he doesn’t need a college education either. Many brothers are teachers, spiritual directors, and other “professions” that require an advanced education.

Just as vocations are bein limited by college debt, so educating someone at a basic (college) level once they have already joined is being limited. College is expensive, but often necessary, and the orders don’t want to include a basic BA education if they have other candidates who already possess that.

 

[Mrs_Sally]

this

I, for one, am extremely grateful for the Christian kids in the public schools. I am a Christian because of them. I didn’t grow up with any faith, but in high school my friends started going to a lunch time Bible study and I went to so I didn’t have to eat alone and that set me down the road of faith. I am SOO thankful for their witness.

I get so frustrated with these kinds of threads that paint all public schools as horrible secular places. Are some pretty bad? Sure, but that isn’t something universal. I graduated in 2000, so not that long ago and out of all my teachers, the only ones I remember being religious were Christians. I don’t remember any teachers being anti-Christian and remember only one kid that was, but he wasn’t nasty about it, we had many fun discussions on the subject. And I came out of public school with more faith than I went it with.

It is just frustrating to see all of one type of schooling painted with the same brush. Homeschooled kids are all anti-social, private-schoolers are all snobs and public schoolers are all secular. None of those are true. Individual schools should be judged individually and examined on how they will best fit within the needs of individual families or kids. No more of this never send your kids to public school or they will loose their faith.

Wonderful post. Thank you Karen! I’ll say a prayer for those friends of yours!

 

[Jordan719]

And priests don’t need college?? Most diocese and orders won’t accept a man for priesthood who doesn’t already have a college degree. And just because someone is a religious brother doesn’t mean he doesn’t need a college education either. Many brothers are teachers, spiritual directors, and other “professions” that require an advanced education.

Just as vocations are bein limited by college debt, so educating someone at a basic (college) level once they have already joined is being limited. College is expensive, but often necessary, and the orders don’t want to include a basic BA education if they have other candidates who already possess that.

You don’t need a college degree to be successful.

 

[Schieffelin]

this

**
I get so frustrated with these kinds of threads that paint all public schools as horrible secular places.** .

I really don’t think anyone is trying to do that. I think by and large most the responses have been thoughtful and respectful (especially of each others personal decisions). It’s hard to have a constructive debate about this kind of thing online–I probably should have thought twice about the headline I used because I can see how it would be inflammatory (though I sincerely did not mean it that way; I was just venting my personal frustrations).

I hope we can all continue to post with a presumption of good will on each other’s parts.

Every family is different, every kid is different, every financial situation is different. Truthfully though, the whole public school system in this country was founded on explicitly anti-Catholic principles and I just think it’s important for all of us to be aware of. I will try to find some articles to post later to give you more detail about what I’m talking about.

 

[Mrs_Sally]

You don’t need a college degree to be successful.

That is certainly true for some people. However, to think that it is true today for any priest or most religious brothers is incorrect. If you are praying that your children have vocations to religious life, you should also be prepared to hear that they need an education beyond high school to be accepted by many diocese or orders.

 

[poker10]

No problem, leave it to their god darwin; “survival of the fittest”. Since 2 males or 2 females can’t reproduce, they’ll just go extinct.

I guess you aren’t familiar with modern science.

 

[poker10]

You don’t need a college degree to be successful.

No, but it increases your odds significantly.

 

[ccmnxc]

I currently attend a Catholic High School. Though the staff are pretty Catholic in morals and teaching, many of the students are a different story. We had a marriage talk at our school. It was about how to commit in relationship and give of yourself to your spouse. However, there was a big deal about it on Facebook, with one person going so far as to say they were going to preach against adopting children . There were quite a few people who didn’t attend because they thought it would be on homosexuality. It wasn’t mentioned once. So yeah, I don’t think Catholic schols are immune to it, though I would say there is less of a backlash for being Catholic about it.