Thou Shalt not Lie?

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I missed reading this post before my previous post.

Mental reservation may be used if telling the truth would cause grave harm.
Or a person can remain silent.

Lying is the direct and deliberate deprivation of truth from an assertion. So silence, mental reservation (misleading someone), telling a fictional joke, telling a parable, or bluffing in poker would not be lies.

Intrinsically evil acts are always immoral. So one cannot choose a lesser intrinsically evil act in order to avoid committing a greater intrinsically evil act. One is required by the moral law to refrain from all intrinsically evil acts.

The CCC does not state that lying is justified in a circumstance when the other person has no right to a particular truth.
I would imagine that also includes deliberate omission of sentences or paragraphs from Catholic doctrine and taking those things purposely out of context as to mislead someone or to get your personal opinion or belief across, right? I have seen this done quite a few times on people’s personal websites…without a specific explanation that it isn’t Church Teaching but personal opinion.
 
I missed reading this post before my previous post.

Mental reservation may be used if telling the truth would cause grave harm.
Or a person can remain silent.

Lying is the direct and deliberate deprivation of truth from an assertion. So silence, mental reservation (misleading someone), telling a fictional joke, telling a parable, or bluffing in poker would not be lies.

Intrinsically evil acts are always immoral. So one cannot choose a lesser intrinsically evil act in order to avoid committing a greater intrinsically evil act. One is required by the moral law to refrain from all intrinsically evil acts.

The CCC does not state that lying is justified in a circumstance when the other person has no right to a particular truth.
A not unexpected or implausible hypothetical. The nazis have read the CCC and are well aware that Catholics might remain silent or engage in word play to avoid answering the direct question of whether Jews are being hidden on the property. Silence or anything short of a “yes” or “no” will be taken as a “yes”, and will result in the execution of the entire household.

Once again, do the Jew hunters have a right to the truth? And is telling them the Jews are not here when they actually are present a lie? I’m guessing that we agree that its not a lie and therefore not intrinsically evil.
 
I think we’d be better off without Santa Claus and all the excess materialism of the Christmas season – a lot of people would be without jobs if that myth ended, though.

Santa Claus is mythical – based, we’re told on some very generous person who lived long ago. The myth has been embellished, for sure.

Is it wrong for me to encourage my parent, even if I know that he/she is dying? The problem is, our parents themselves may not be educated enough to deal with the truth of a medical situation or confront their own mortality from a Christian standpoint, as they should.

And, in the political arena, the whole essence of politics seems to be creating illusions out of half-truths, using words very carefully to weave around the truth, etc. ignoring the national debt, etc.

The Catholic Church has this whole category of special revelations (as opposed to general revelation) – interestingly we do not have to give our assent to it, like Fatima or Guadalupe or Lourdes.

Jesus said to beware of the future, when we would be told that He was here or there – yet we have supposedly divine revelations to St. Francis and St. Faustina – nothing less than Jesus Himself appearing to these popular saints. There are Catholics who believe that the Virgin Mary is appearing all over the place and of course these messengers are always trying to get us to believe in these messages. What do you think? The Church, itself, says that we don’t have to give the assent of faith to these things. I don’t even know why we have this category of announcements and revelations, etc.

I think it undermines the efforts of the Church at evangelization.

Yeah, we live in a world of fictional literature – science fiction and dramatic fiction – Dan Brown’s DiVinci Code etc. We LOVE when people lie to us.
 
A not unexpected or implausible hypothetical. The nazis have read the CCC and are well aware that Catholics might remain silent or engage in word play to avoid answering the direct question of whether Jews are being hidden on the property. Silence or anything short of a “yes” or “no” will be taken as a “yes”, and will result in the execution of the entire household.

Once again, do the Jew hunters have a right to the truth? And is telling them the Jews are not here when they actually are present a lie? I’m guessing that we agree that its not a lie and therefore not intrinsically evil.
The Church teaches that lying is intrinsically evil and therefore always immoral. If someone does not have a right to a particular truth, one may remain silent or use mental reservation, but lying remains immoral.

Some persons take the position that lying is sometimes moral, and these persons generally allow for supposedly-moral lying in numerous circumstances, little lies told to protect someone’s feelings, or to avoid a negative consequence, in various daily circumstances.

But no one takes the position that lying is only ever moral when there is grave danger to the lives of the innocent, or other grave circumstances.

What happens very commonly, though, is that people use the example of grave danger to the innocent (for some reason they often cite the Holocaust) in order to justify all the little convenient lies of daily life. It is reprehensible to use the deaths of millions of Jews during World War II as a way to justify selfish little lies told to avoid some relatively minor unpleasantness in daily life.
 
The Church teaches that lying is intrinsically evil and therefore always immoral. If someone does not have a right to a particular truth, one may remain silent or use mental reservation, but lying remains immoral.

Some persons take the position that lying is sometimes moral, and these persons generally allow for supposedly-moral lying in numerous circumstances, little lies told to protect someone’s feelings, or to avoid a negative consequence, in various daily circumstances.

But no one takes the position that lying is only ever moral when there is grave danger to the lives of the innocent, or other grave circumstances.

What happens very commonly, though, is that people use the example of grave danger to the innocent (for some reason they often cite the Holocaust) in order to justify all the little convenient lies of daily life. It is reprehensible to use the deaths of millions of Jews during World War II as a way to justify selfish little lies told to avoid some relatively minor unpleasantness in daily life.
Ron,
Yes I agree to an extent with the above, especially using grave circumstances to justify “non-grave” actions.
And Yet, I have not done so but rather used the most benign examples of small children and the things we tell them - Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, causes of lightening and thunder…things like this. I find it interesting that you have chosen to avoid responding to these.
You say we may “remain silent or use mental reservation” yet I don’t see how either of these can be applied to Santa Claus… or even more, the Easter Bunny…

Do we Lie, and therefor sin, by encouraging these fantasies in small children?

Peace
James
 
Ron,
Yes I agree to an extent with the above, especially using grave circumstances to justify “non-grave” actions.
And Yet, I have not done so but rather used the most benign examples of small children and the things we tell them - Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, causes of lightening and thunder…things like this. I find it interesting that you have chosen to avoid responding to these.
You say we may “remain silent or use mental reservation” yet I don’t see how either of these can be applied to Santa Claus… or even more, the Easter Bunny…

Do we Lie, and therefor sin, by encouraging these fantasies in small children?

Peace
James
Those are not lies, but fictional stories. Children do not distinguish sharply between fanstasy and reality. When we tell children such stories, we are presenting a fanstasy, not a lie about reality.

The Magisterium teaches that certain types of acts are intrinsically evil and therefore always immoral (because they have an evil moral object). It is not a valid theological argument, when the Church teaches, as a matter of faith, that an act is always immoral, to consider every possible act of that type, find an act that merely **seems **like it should be moral, and thereby conclude that the Church’s teaching is wrong. All you have are a few examples which seem like moral lies. This does not even speak to the principle taught by the Church that an evil moral object makes an act always immoral.
 
Those are not lies, but fictional stories. Children do not distinguish sharply between fanstasy and reality. When we tell children such stories, we are presenting a fanstasy, not a lie about reality.

The Magisterium teaches that certain types of acts are intrinsically evil and therefore always immoral (because they have an evil moral object). It is not a valid theological argument, when the Church teaches, as a matter of faith, that an act is always immoral, to consider every possible act of that type, find an act that merely **seems **like it should be moral, and thereby conclude that the Church’s teaching is wrong. All you have are a few examples which seem like moral lies. This does not even speak to the principle taught by the Church that an evil moral object makes an act always immoral.
Please do not conclude from my questions that I am trying to say the Church’s teaching is wrong. I am trying to better understand the teachings.

Allow me two questions - comments here…
One - So telling a child Santa-Claus is real, is simply presenting a “fantasy” and not a lie about reality?
Excuse for saying so, but that seems like a stretch to me, and in actuality it looks like one of those “justifications” that you have tried to say is wrong.

Two - Could please clarify wht the “evil moral object is”? I believe I have an idea in this but would like to see the “official” definition. (Sorry if you already posted this and I missed it.

Peace
James
 
Two - Could please clarify wht the “evil moral object is”? I believe I have an idea in this but would like to see the “official” definition. (Sorry if you already posted this and I missed it.
See Veritatis Splendor for extensive magisterial teaching on the moral object.
What I will give is my own explanation, which of course is not ‘official’.

Morality is concerned with the knowingly chosen acts of human persons (called human acts, or simply acts). Certain acts are intrinsically evil. These acts are of a type that is inherently morally disordered; in and of themselves, these acts are immoral by the very nature of the act, independent of intention and circumstances. The knowing choice of this type of act is necessarily a disorder of the will – for morality concerns the knowing choices of the free will. Such acts are always objectively immoral. The knowing choice of this type of act is always a sin.

Intrinsically evil acts are inherently disordered because they are inherently directed toward an end, called the moral object, an end in terms of morality – not in terms of intention (the intended end) or consequences (the end result) – which is evil. A moral object is an end toward which a knowingly chosen act is inherently ordered (directed). An evil moral object is a moral object that is contrary to the love of God, and the love of neighbor as self, which is the basis for all morality.

But what makes an act intrinsically evil is not the attainment of the moral object, but rather the inherent ordering of the act itself toward that evil moral object, regardless of whether or not it is attained.

For example, if a man attempts to commit murder (the direct and voluntary killing of an innocent human person), but fails, he has still chosen an act that is inherently ordered toward that evil end – despite the fact that the end was not attained and so no one died.
 
Morality is concerned with the knowingly chosen acts of human persons (called human acts, or simply acts). Certain acts are intrinsically evil. These acts are of a type that is inherently morally disordered; in and of themselves, these acts are immoral by the very nature of the act, independent of intention and circumstances. /QUOTE]

Ron, you do a great job of referencing the magesterium. Thanks.

Pardon my thickness here. The quoted phrases confuse me. ‘Knowingly’ and ‘chosen’ imply something of the mind set of the actor.

‘knowingly chosen’ implies intention, doesn’t it? If so, then it cannot be both intentional and unintentional.

What did I miss?

Thanks.
 
Ron Conte;7307216:
Morality is concerned with the knowingly chosen acts of human persons (called human acts, or simply acts). Certain acts are intrinsically evil. These acts are of a type that is inherently morally disordered; in and of themselves, these acts are immoral by the very nature of the act, independent of intention and circumstances.
Ron, you do a great job of referencing the magesterium. Thanks.

Pardon my thickness here. The quoted phrases confuse me. ‘Knowingly’ and ‘chosen’ imply something of the mind set of the actor.

‘knowingly chosen’ implies intention, doesn’t it? If so, then it cannot be both intentional and unintentional.

What did I miss?

Thanks.
rc,
If Ron will excuse my butting in, let me tell you what I see here.
“Knowingly Chosen” certainly does imply some desired result or “intention”.
However, the desired intention of an act might also have undesired, or unforeseen consequences. Therefore the results of a knowingly chosen act might have unforseen (unintended) outcomes.
These outcomes, whether intentional or unintentional do not change the nature of the Chosen Act itself.

Peace
James
 
Morality is based on objective truth. Even if a person does not know that an act, such as contraception, is intrinsically evil, the act remains objectively sinful. Even if a person does not freely choose an act (because something intervenes to keep his choice from being free), an intrinsically evil act remains objectively immoral.

But morality pertains to created persons, who have intellect and free will. So an objective sin is an act that would be an actual sin (with culpability) to knowingly choose. Ultimately, sin is about knowingly chose acts, because without knowledge and free will there would be no actual sin.

There are three fonts of morality: (1) intention, (2) moral object, (3) circumstances.

The first font of intention is the purpose or intended end for which the act is chosen.

The second font of moral object is more fully explained as the act itself with its inherent moral meaning, as determined by the moral object. It is always a sin to knowingly (intentionally, deliberately) choose an inherently disordered act, i.e. an act that is inherently directed toward an evil moral object. But the morality of the second font depends on its moral object.

The intentional choice of an act that is intrinsically evil is always immoral, regardless of the intention for which the act is chosen. A person’s intended end or purpose cannot cause an intrinsically evil act to become moral. But the act must be intentionally chosen in order to be a sin.

If person intentionally asserts a falsehood, knowing that the assertion is false, he sins, for lying is intrinsically evil. Even if he has a very good intended end in mind for the purpose of the lie, his act is still a sin because he has intentionally chosen an inherently disordered act.

Can he choose an intrinsically evil act and somehow, by a good intended end, make that act moral? No, he cannot.

If person asserts a falsehood, incorrectly thinking that the assertion is true, he does not lie, for intrinsically evil acts are always intentionally chosen. But the intended end or purpose cannot change the moral object of the act.
 
See Veritatis Splendor for extensive magisterial teaching on the moral object.
What I will give is my own explanation, which of course is not ‘official’.

Morality is concerned with the knowingly chosen acts of human persons (called human acts, or simply acts). Certain acts are intrinsically evil. These acts are of a type that is inherently morally disordered; in and of themselves, these acts are immoral by the very nature of the act, independent of intention and circumstances. The knowing choice of this type of act is necessarily a disorder of the will – for morality concerns the knowing choices of the free will. Such acts are always objectively immoral. The knowing choice of this type of act is always a sin.

Intrinsically evil acts are inherently disordered because they are inherently directed toward an end, called the moral object, an end in terms of morality – not in terms of intention (the intended end) or consequences (the end result) – which is evil. A moral object is an end toward which a knowingly chosen act is inherently ordered (directed). An evil moral object is a moral object that is contrary to the love of God, and the love of neighbor as self, which is the basis for all morality.

But what makes an act intrinsically evil is not the attainment of the moral object, but rather the inherent ordering of the act itself toward that evil moral object, regardless of whether or not it is attained.
Ron,
Thank you for the brief and very fine explanation. It is very helpful. If I may summarize just a bit more, here are the main points I see….
A moral object is an end toward which a knowingly chosen act is inherently ordered (directed).
An evil moral object is a moral object that is contrary to the love of God, and the love of neighbor as self, which is the basis for all morality.
Intrinsically evil acts are of a type that is inherently morally disordered; in and of themselves, these acts are immoral by the very nature of the act, independent of intention and circumstances.
I decided to go back to the Catechism and found these “definitions” of lying….
2482 “A lie consists in speaking a falsehood with the intention of deceiving.”…
2483 … To lie is to speak or act against the truth in order (intend) to lead someone into error.
I note that in both of these descriptions the term “intent” is used. Intent is given as a primary factor in what constitutes a lie. In other words, the “inherent moral object”, of a lie is the intent to deceive or cause error, which, of course, is evil.
In other words, in order for something to properly be called a “lie” (for the purpose of being a sin) the object must be to deceive, cause error.

I’m beginning to think that perhaps the problem I, and many others, have stems from the generally understood definition(s) of the term lie.
In general terms, a “lie” is speaking anything that is known to be not factually true, yet there are many cases in which one can say something that is not factually true, without the intent to “deceive or cause error” in any negative sense.
Some cases of this might be giving children “age appropriate” responses about lightening, or Santa Claus, or misdirecting someone in order to prevent their finding out about the surprise party planned for them. Are these things lies in the sinful sense of being “offenses against the Truth”?
The CCC 2464 states that, “…Offenses against the truth express by word or deed a refusal to commit oneself to moral uprightness”.

I’m beginning to think that English simply does not have a word we can use to distinguish between what would be a “sinful untruth” and one that would not be sinful based on the moral object. The closest thing is the famous “white lie” which I don’t think is something that has any real “approved” dictionary definition.

Anyway, I appreciate you taking the time to help me with this and apologize if I seem thickheaded, stubborn or dense.
However, since the CCC tells us, in it’s discussion of moral conscience, that we have the freedom to act on our conscience and the obligation to properly form same, I feel the need to probe certain things both for my own benefit and the benefit of any others that I encounter.

Peace
James
 
I decided to go back to the Catechism and found these “definitions” of lying….2482 “A lie consists in speaking a falsehood with the intention of deceiving.”…
2483 … To lie is to speak or act against the truth in order (intend) to lead someone into error.I note that in both of these descriptions the term “intent” is used. Intent is given as a primary factor in what constitutes a lie. In other words, the “inherent moral object”, of a lie is the intent to deceive or cause error, which, of course, is evil.
In other words, in order for something to properly be called a “lie” (for the purpose of being a sin) the object must be to deceive, cause error.
The intention to deceive is not the moral object. The first font of intention is in the subject who acts, so the intention is the purpose chosen by the human person. But the second font of moral object is in the act itself. The act itself is inherently directed toward an end, regardless of the purpose of the person who acts. The CCC explicitly states that deception is the intention, not the object.

The Catechism teaches that intention and moral object are two different fonts. The definition of lying mentions the intention to deceive, because this is the most common intention [first font] in lying. But any speaking of a falsehood (speaking or acting against the truth) is still a lie. The moral object is the denial of a truth, or assertion of a falsehood.

This is also the case with euthanasia. The intrinsically evil act of euthanasia is murder with the purpose (intention) of relieving suffering. But if the same act is committed for a different purpose or intention, the moral object is unchanged and so the act is still murder.

Pope John Paul II: “Regardless of intentions and circumstances, euthanasia is always an intrinsically evil act, a violation of God’s law and an offence against the dignity of the human person.”
Letter of his Holiness Pope John Paul II to the Elderly
vatican.va/holy_father/john_paul_ii/letters/documents/hf_jp-ii_let_01101999_elderly_en.html

Pope John Paul II: “Despite the intentions or circumstances, direct euthanasia is an act which is always and per se intrinsically evil…”
vatican.va/holy_father/john_paul_ii/speeches/1993/november/documents/hf_jp-ii_spe_19931111_pennsylvania-ad-limina_en.html

Similarly, abortion is murder in the circumstance that the person who is killed is prenatal. But if the murderer waits until the prenatal is born before killing him, then the circumstance has changed, but the moral object has not changed.

Intention and circumstances cannot make an intrinsically evil act moral, nor can a change in intention or circumstances change the moral object.

So even though the catechism states the most common intention for lying (the purpose of deceiving), it is still an intrinsically evil act if the purpose changes.

The same analysis applies to contraception.
  1. A married couple use a condom for the purpose (intention) of avoiding pregnancy. This is contraception and is intrinsically evil.
  2. A married couple use a condom to prevent disease transmission. The intention has changed, but the nature of the act is the same. This is still contraception and still intrinsically evil.
  3. A married couple use a abortifacient contraceptives for the purpose (intention) of avoiding pregnancy. This is contraception and abortion, and is intrinsically evil.
  4. A married couple use abortifacient contraceptives with the purpose of treating a medical disorder. The intention has changed, but the nature of the act is the same. This is still contraception and abortion, and still intrinsically evil.
Lying is usually done for the purpose of deceiving, but even with a different purpose, the moral object remains evil.
 
The intention to deceive is not the moral object. The first font of intention is in the subject who acts, so the intention is the purpose chosen by the human person. But the second font of moral object is in the act itself. The act itself is inherently directed toward an end, regardless of the purpose of the person who acts. The CCC explicitly states that deception is the intention, not the object.

The Catechism teaches that intention and moral object are two different fonts. The definition of lying mentions the intention to deceive, because this is the most common intention [first font] in lying. But any speaking of a falsehood (speaking or acting against the truth) is still a lie. The moral object is the denial of a truth, or assertion of a falsehood.

This is also the case with euthanasia. The intrinsically evil act of euthanasia is murder with the purpose (intention) of relieving suffering. But if the same act is committed for a different purpose or intention, the moral object is unchanged and so the act is still murder.

Pope John Paul II: “Regardless of intentions and circumstances, euthanasia is always an intrinsically evil act, a violation of God’s law and an offence against the dignity of the human person.”
Letter of his Holiness Pope John Paul II to the Elderly
vatican.va/holy_father/john_paul_ii/letters/documents/hf_jp-ii_let_01101999_elderly_en.html

Pope John Paul II: “Despite the intentions or circumstances, direct euthanasia is an act which is always and per se intrinsically evil…”
vatican.va/holy_father/john_paul_ii/speeches/1993/november/documents/hf_jp-ii_spe_19931111_pennsylvania-ad-limina_en.html

Similarly, abortion is murder in the circumstance that the person who is killed is prenatal. But if the murderer waits until the prenatal is born before killing him, then the circumstance has changed, but the moral object has not changed.

Intention and circumstances cannot make an intrinsically evil act moral, nor can a change in intention or circumstances change the moral object.

So even though the catechism states the most common intention for lying (the purpose of deceiving), it is still an intrinsically evil act if the purpose changes.

The same analysis applies to contraception.
  1. A married couple use a condom for the purpose (intention) of avoiding pregnancy. This is contraception and is intrinsically evil.
  2. A married couple use a condom to prevent disease transmission. The intention has changed, but the nature of the act is the same. This is still contraception and still intrinsically evil.
  3. A married couple use a abortifacient contraceptives for the purpose (intention) of avoiding pregnancy. This is contraception and abortion, and is intrinsically evil.
  4. A married couple use abortifacient contraceptives with the purpose of treating a medical disorder. The intention has changed, but the nature of the act is the same. This is still contraception and abortion, and still intrinsically evil.
Lying is usually done for the purpose of deceiving, but even with a different purpose, the moral object remains evil.
Ron, without having had the opportunity to review the above in depth, I would like to address your choice of examples. While they are quite appropriate, they are also, at least to me, quite obvious. Note how your examples involve the large issues of human life, while those I pose are of a far less critical, life threatening, “mortal sin” nature.
So long as you and I keep using examples from the opposite ends of a spectum of examples we’re going to wind up talking past each other.

I have no problem with the issues at the “high end” of the spectrum. Even issues like the Nazi/Jewish scenerios often posed are really not a problem to my thinking. The issues that I am struggling with, largely because of the things I see OCD types post here sometimes, are the “Low end” issues. Where there is not intent to cause harm and the object is to bring joy (Santa, or suprise party etc…)

So what I am asking here is that we deal with the “Low End” examples that are causing me problems rather than the high end examples which aer not causing me problems.

Deal??

Peace
James
 
The intention to deceive is not the moral object. The first font of intention is in the subject who acts, so the intention is the purpose chosen by the human person. But the second font of moral object is in the act itself. The act itself is inherently directed toward an end, regardless of the purpose of the person who acts. The CCC explicitly states that deception is the intention, not the object.
You are losing me again.
So I act, to deceive my wife for intention of surprising her with a party in her honor. My intent is to deceive – what is the object in this that is objectively evil?
The Catechism teaches that intention and moral object are two different fonts. The definition of lying mentions the intention to deceive, because this is the most common intention [first font] in lying. But any speaking of a falsehood (speaking or acting against the truth) is still a lie. The moral object is the denial of a truth, or assertion of a falsehood.
In the items quoted from the Catechism (my main source of teaching) nothing is said about “fonts”. The two references state what a lie is. It is, to speak or act against truth in order to lead someone into error. It consists of, 1) speaking a (known) falsehood with the 2) intent to deceive….
So the way I read this, in order for something to be considered a lie, intent must be taken into consideration since such intent is inherent in the definitions given in the Catechism.
As a clarification on the above, this intent MUST be seen within the boundaries of a properly formed conscience enlightened by the Holy Spirit and the Teachings of the Church. I am always speaking with this view in mind and not seeking some “loophole”.
This is also the case with euthanasia. The intrinsically evil act of euthanasia is murder with the purpose (intention) of relieving suffering. But if the same act is committed for a different purpose or intention, the moral object is unchanged and so the act is still murder.
OK, this is an easy one….Now explain how it applies to telling an untruth to someone to ensure their surprise at their surprise birthday party….

Peace
James
 
I see no such blanket prohibition.
From the Didache (Apostolic fathers, ~100AD) ch.3
This is not part of the holy canon but its interesting what was taught among early Christians.

My child, flee from every evil
and everything that resembleth it.
Be not angry,
for anger leadeth to murder,
nor jealous nor contentious nor wrathful;
for of all these things murders are engendered.
My child, be not lustful,
for lust leadeth to fornication,
neither foul-speaking neither with uplifted eyes;
for of all these things adulteries are engendered.
My child, be no dealer in omens,
since it leads to idolatry,
nor an enchanter nor an astrologer nor a magician,
neither be willing to look at them;
for from all these things idolatry is engendered.
My child, be not a liar,
since lying leads to theft,
neither avaricious neither vainglorious;
for from all these things thefts are engendered.
 
Why do we spend so much time trying to find really good exceptions to the rules or possible loopholes in each of the commandments?

I think where there is a lot of confusion about what is or isn’t lying is because we generally accept that any statement that is not true is a lie. The examples mentioned earlier about pants making someone look fat or an ugly baby are not good examples because any answer cannot be an objective reply. Any response is the speaker’s opinion which cannot be true or false. In these specific examples, there is no objective truth about how fat looks or what is ugly.

We have to speak the objective truth about something when someone is entitled to the answer. Does this mean that when a child asks us a question that an adult answer needs to be given in order not to lie? No. The response should be age appropriate but should never be a lie.
 
Why do we spend so much time trying to find really good exceptions to the rules or possible loopholes in each of the commandments?

I think where there is a lot of confusion about what is or isn’t lying is because we generally accept that any statement that is not true is a lie. The examples mentioned earlier about pants making someone look fat or an ugly baby are not good examples because any answer cannot be an objective reply. Any response is the speaker’s opinion which cannot be true or false. In these specific examples, there is no objective truth about how fat looks or what is ugly.

We have to speak the objective truth about something when someone is entitled to the answer. Does this mean that when a child asks us a question that an adult answer needs to be given in order not to lie? No. The response should be age appropriate but should never be a lie.
Yes - The Bolded section is at least part of the reason for my inquiry.
The commandment is Thou shall not bear false witness against thy neighbor.
And in the catechism references I used above, the description of a lie includes “the intent to deceive” and to “lead into error”.

Ron Conte, by his very patient explanations has been trying to get me to understand the intricacies of the problem, but I think that you have hit on the crux of the problem very well indeed.

Finally, Please know that I am not looking for “loopholes” but trying to deepen my understandings.

Peace
James
 
How do you lie in a poker game??

I have never had anyone ask me what cards I have when I have played poker.
I play at a semi-professional level here in Las Vegas (meaning I play a lot) and I ask people all the time what they have, or whether they’ can beat a certain hand (which might or might not be my hand) or whether they’d call. A bluff is a nonverbal misrepresentation, someone who thinks he’s picked off a tell is a prime target for another kind of deceit.
 
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