Tired of being single

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kage_ar said:
To compare to hunger, every one of you could be married to a faithful Catholic man/woman within 6 months. I promise. You could satisfy that hunger.

What about looking for someone who loves God, is a faithful Catholic and is free to marry and will be your best friend for life.
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Pray tell, where is this magical store that sells potential spouses?

I probably could get married in a year, but it wouldn’t be to a Catholic man. Check out the thread Single and Socializing to get an idea of the frustrations that most other young adult Catholics have in meeting other young adult Catholics.

I entered the Church in 2006 and I didn’t have a close friend (male or female!) who goes to Mass every week until 2008. I went two years feeling very much as though I was the only Catholic my age who actually cared about her faith. Never mind finding a spouse in six months.

Even going to a Catholic college is no guarantee of meeting someone. The deacon at my church spent part of the 40 Days for Life praying the rosary outside an abortion clinic. He writes that he was heartbroken to see how many young men and women went to the abortion clinic with bumper stickers for Catholic schools, and walked to the front door wearing sweaters and hoodies to Catholic colleges.

The reality is, most Catholic singles feel that they have to choose between marrying a non-Catholic, or staying single forever.
 
CountrySinger said:
This is why I shouldn’t type while exhausted. I was just saying that I’m not picky at all when it comes to a husband, all I need is a pulse and male body parts…
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Yep. Ideally, I’d like to marry a Catholic, but realistically, that has to be optional.
 
valient_Lucy said:
Yep. Ideally, I’d like to marry a Catholic, but realistically, that has to be optional.
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Yep, it’s hard to find a good spouse no matter what, and even harder when you add a qualifier of religion. Since there are no stores that sell men, we have to take what we can get as we get older. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to fall in love with a wonderful man (in fact, I have a crush on one right now 😊 ). But if it doesnt work out, I have to be willing to settle unless I want to be 35 and single.
 
I am 34 and still single and so tired of it. I am also so tired of dating “the same man in a different form.” I am searching for a practicing Catholic male and boy are they hard to find. Sometimes I feel like all the good ones are married.

For the ladies who are tired of going to church alone–I know the feeling. But remember we are there to worship Jesus. Sometimes the couples cuddling in the pews in front of me really try my patience. I recommend sitting up front or closing your eyes!

Try finding a “Mass buddy.” When I lived overseas I would always go to Mass with a couple of friends, even if was a married couple, because I felt so lonely going alone. Now that I am back in the States I have to find a new person. LOL.

I will be praying for everyone on this thread. It is so hard to stay hopeful. I have tried novenas but I am still waiting. Until I find the right one I am working on making me be the best person I can be until God decides I am ready. Or until God decides my future husband is ready!

Since I am already 34 I know there is a good chance I will be single for life. But I am trying to stay optimistic.

Sincerely,

Maria1212
 
Half of those old married or widowed people in your Parish have children, grandchildren, neices/nephews, godchildren etc. who are also adult single Catholics. When was the last time you spent getting to meet people in your Parish? Tell them you are looking to marry a nice Catholic man or woman. Why does socializing to meet a spouse limit itself to hanging out with someone who is your same age?

I know single Catholic men and women of many age groups, and I am a fairly recent convert. Get to know those cradle Catholic families in your Parish and ask them to fix you up.
 
Maria1212 said:
Since I am already 34 I know there is a good chance I will be single for life. But I am trying to stay optimistic.

Sincerely,

Maria1212
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That line makes me so sad. And I’m not quite sure why. 😦 I can’t think of a worse fate. All I can say is that I didn’t give up the religious life (celibacy is so not for me) to be single.
 
Maria1212 said:
For the ladies who are tired of going to church alone–I know the feeling. But remember we are there to worship Jesus. Sometimes the couples cuddling in the pews in front of me really try my patience. I recommend sitting up front or closing your eyes!
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This really does works! I definitely am better about going to Mass in the suburbs if I close my eyes and really focus on what’s being said and sung rather than noticing all the couples/babies/families/etc. Glad I’m not the only one who does this :rolleyes:
kage_ar said:
God did design people to live in marriage - thing is, we want more than just a faitful person of the opposite sex who is free to marry, we want one with “an MBA or other post grad degree, not too short or fat or bald or bucktoothed or pimply or loud or quiet, make at least 65K per year, own a home, have a new car, be funny and an award winning ballroom dancer.”
What about looking for someone who loves God, is a faithful Catholic and is free to marry and will be your best friend for life.
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“Picky” and “discerning”…two very different attitudes. Going for the first may make you picky, but going for the second makes you discerning, and that’s not an easy thing to be in this day and age.

I know some of us out here have heard this same type of prompting over and over from well-meaning friends, family, and co-workers. Hate to say it, but in some ways, it’s easier to find someone with the first set of qualities (I can actually name a handful of people off the top of my head, give or take a couple on that list) than the second (um, ok…wait, no, has a gf…is engaged…is discerning the priesthood, etc.)! I do understand that like attracts like, so I’m always working on growing in those areas myself.
 
CountrySinger said:
This is why I shouldn’t type while exhausted. I was just saying that I’m not picky at all when it comes to a husband, all I need is a pulse and male body parts…
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Countrysinger, with all due respect to Ms. Streisand I appoint you the resident “Funny Girl” of Catholic Forums! 🙂
 
Rascalking said:
Countrysinger, with all due respect to Ms. Streisand I appoint you the resident “Funny Girl” of Catholic Forums! 🙂
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Yay! Do I get a sash?! does beauty queen wave Thank you all for this honor, I would like to thank the Academy of Country Music… I mean Rascalking. 🙂
 
CountrySinger said:
That line makes me so sad. And I’m not quite sure why. 😦 I can’t think of a worse fate. All I can say is that I didn’t give up the religious life (celibacy is so not for me) to be single.
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I would rather be single at 34 than in a unhappy marriage. So there is a worse fate! I also have friends younger than me who are divorced already. I wont say there situation is worse than mine but I am glad I am not in their shoes. Ill keep doing my best to keep living happily single until I find the right guy. I just hope I find him before it is time for a retirement home! LOL.

I realize I got so tired of looking I stopped making effort. And it is not true that when you stop trying you will meet him! But today when going for a walk, I realized I need to keep making an effort to be social in case my future husband is out there somewhere looking for me!

Sincerely,

Maria1212

Sincerely,

Maria1212
 
Rascalking said:
Yes, it is true. No matter how unattractive or unpleasant you might be (not calling you either one) you can find a mate.

Alot depends on attitude.
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Well, I might be able to find a mate among the women who more desirable men don’t want. When you’re unattractive and unsuccessful, “beggars can’t be choosers” is the dominant theme.
 
TedDC said:
Well, I might be able to find a mate among the women who more desirable men don’t want. When you’re unattractive and unsuccessful, “beggars can’t be choosers” is the dominant theme.
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Well not being a vain person I look at some couples and wonder how they ever ended up together. Tiny guys with huge women, Taller women with really short guys, Outgoing types with complete homebodies, on and on. Makes you wonder about Gods sense of humor and why the rest of us who aren’t considered repulsive may be in good shape or even some who are beautiful even can’t find someone??? …
 
Sierrah said:
Well not being a vain person I look at some couples and wonder how they ever ended up together. Tiny guys with huge women, Taller women with really short guys, Outgoing types with complete homebodies, on and on. Makes you wonder about Gods sense of humor and why the rest of us who aren’t considered repulsive may be in good shape or even some who are beautiful even can’t find someone??? …
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Sierrah, I’ve got two words for you: opposites attract 😉

P.S. I’m speaking from experience. Not me, my own parents. 😃
 
Kimothy80 said:
Sierrah, I’ve got two words for you: opposites attract 😉

P.S. I’m speaking from experience. Not me, my own parents. 😃
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Agreed my parents were opposites. My mom could be kind of quiet at times but was social and liked to join groups. My dad was always sort of loud but not much of joiner though he does like to talk.
 
Sierrah said:
Agreed my parents were opposites. My mom could be kind of quiet at times but was social and liked to join groups. My dad was always sort of loud but not much of joiner though he does like to talk.
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My parents are the opposite of yours! My mom is 5’2", is LOUD (hey! She’s from Barranquilla, Colombia! LOL! :p), has always been a social butterfly, can’t carry a tune in a bucket. Dad? 6’3", quiet/shy (Nana has told me that before he met Mom, whenever he was at parties he’d have his arms folded across his chest and he’d come off as if he was being a jerk), has few friends but can be social now when he has to be, and plays the guitar and has a decent singing voice (he was in his church’s children’s choir growing up but stopped when a “really really cute girl” turned our and told him that his voice sounded awful–and this was when his voice was starting to change! :eek:).

Wait, where was I going with this? Oh yeah!! To quote a certain Paula Abdul song, Opposites Attract… 😉
 
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