Toddler Watching Videos During Mass

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Well, that isn’t a helpful response.

OP, kids engaged with screens are tuned out. I join others on the forum urging you not to give your kid a video to watch. I know it’s rough; we have a long church service, and my kids are 6, almost 5, and 3, and it’s still difficult! But it sounds like you and your wife are doing fine. Keep at it!
 
No, I wouldn’t do that. Kids learn over time how to behave and that they will not always be entertained. The most I would give her might be a little kid Bible storybook.
 
heidi_storage said:
Well, that isn’t a helpful response.
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Just a note given the responses I have read that ranged from the bizarre (children are just little adults, just explain to them and everything will be fine) to the theologically nutty (you don’t need to go to Mass since you have a child).

I believe it helpful to provide a measure of caution in the thread.
 
My oldest was a handful when he was little at mass. Often he would visit with grandma while Dad and I went to mass. As he got older, mass was easier.
 
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Allegra said:
Sure, as long as you and your video aren’t sitting anywhere near where my kids can see you.
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Indeed. OP whatever you decide to do, just please keep in mind the other parents with kids. Technology is a draw for all children.
 
vz71 said:
Just a quick read through tells me a lot of the responses are coming from people with no children of their own.
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Like which ones? Almost all of the responses in this thread are extremely reasonable. At least 6 or 7 of them come from posters who have kids (either they mentioned their kids right on this thread or on other threads).

Also, even people who do not have kids of their own were kids themselves at one time, may very well have baby-sat kids, and likely had younger siblings and/or younger relatives who attended Mass and remembered what their own parents did, or their relatives did, whether it was use the cry room or give a kid a teddy bear or a book or sit up front or whatever.

Your comment really didn’t add anything to the discussion, except an unfounded judgment.
 
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I recall when I was little my Mom and Dad would bring a Christian Themed coloring book for me or they would bring picture books (Christina themed).

I know when our kids were little, we didn’t bring anything for them once they were old enough to not be held. Yes, they would fidget at times, but they all learned to be quiet, and not distract people. I think only once I had to take our middle boy out to the gathering space to have a talk with him.

I know all too well you just want to bolt for someplace when the child is making noise etc, but imagine what the Church would be like if there were no children in it. That would truly be a sad state as they are such a gift. Anytime I hear a child scream or talking at mass, I smile as I know that is Jesus in our midst.
 
Exactly. I love hearing children make their silly noises during Mass. It’s great to see oodles of young families. It means our Parish is healthy.

Now, a first-grader behind me was kicking my pew and then my feet as I knelt…I was NOT okay with that.
 
vz71 said:
F_Marturana: Parents taking care of small children are excused from Mass.
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CCC 2181:
2181 The Sunday Eucharist is the foundation and confirmation of all Christian practice. For this reason the faithful are obliged to participate in the Eucharist on days of obligation, unless excused for a serious reason (for example, illness, the care of infants) or dispensed by their own pastor. Those who deliberately fail in this obligation commit a grave sin.
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The Catechism makes it quite clear that the need to care for young children is a sufficient basis on which a Catholic may be excused from Mass, and that s/he doesn’t need to get a dispensation for it.

Obviously, good Catholic parents might prefer to attend Mass. When I was tiny, one parent would stay home with me while the other went to Mass, then the other parent would stay home with me while the other went to Mass. I understand that this may not work for logistical reasons - for example, the church might be a significant distance away, there may be only one Sunday Mass, the parent may be a single parent with no spouse or other person to trade off child care, etc. I also understand that some couples feel it is very important to attend Mass as a family, including the very young children.
But the point is, if someone has a serious childcare issue involving young children, they are excused from their Mass obligation.
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Tis_Bearself said:
The Catechism makes it quite clear that the need to care for young children is a sufficient basis on which a Catholic may be excused from Mass, and that s/he doesn’t need to get a dispensation for it.
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The children spoken of in the original post are not infants.
 
Catholic Sprouts is a program created by Nancy, a mom of five children, who wanted to help other mothers and fathers raise their children in the faith. One of the things she offers is patterns for Mass and Rosary “quiet books”, books that toddlers can use to help keep them occupied while still offering them an introduction to the Mass and the Rosary. She has two sets of patterns for sale, one that is felt and one that is paper. They feature simple activities such as feeling sequins and opening flaps. The Mass quiet book features, at the end, a little girl that you can teach the Sign of the Cross. Her arms are made of separate pieces so they will move. The Blessed Sacrament is explained in a beautiful way - the page is actually two pages. The front page has the chalice and Sacred Host, and then a zipper (for the felt version) or flaps (for the paper version) is opened to reveal Jesus on the cross.
 
I have posted a clarification comment and the passage from the Catechism. You have chosen to reject my explanation. I think we’re at an impasse and see no point in responding further.
 
Aquila_Lucis said:
Thoughts about doing this during Mass?
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Suggestions for coloring books are cute and all, but those always bored my children to tears. Some of those chunky little toddler legs were just born to move. I spent many of those tumultuous toddler years condemned to the cry room or the narthex, switching off care duties with my husband.

You might collaborate with your priest, parish council, and other parents to see about a nursery or co-op during one of the Masses. We had one at my former parish, by the time my youngest was a tot, and it was a godsend.

I don’t recommend the screen for the same reason suggested by other commenters - namely, the factor that it will become an expectation long after your child is old enough to get something out of Mass.
 
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Tis_Bearself said:
. I think we’re at an impasse and see no point in responding further.
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I believe this needs a response.
Are the children spoken of in the original post sufficient reason to skip Mass?

Some of the advice given in this thread indicates so. Is this good advise? Do we know enough about the children to say?
If not, then there should be clarification given concerning that piece of advice.
 
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