Transgender children

[Thorolfr]

There’s an interesting story about transgender children in today’s Guardian:

Cassie Wilson can p(name removed by moderator)oint the moment her daughter Melanie became her son, Tom. They were in the supermarket and Melanie, then two and a half, said: “I don’t want to be a girl any more – I’m going to be a boy, and I’m going to be called Tom.”

“That was that,” Cassie tells me. “I said: ‘Come on, then, Tom.’ He could have said he was called anything and I would have thought, great, fine, let’s get on with the shop.”

“I was wearing my Spiderman costume,” Tom, now five, remembers.

“Yes, you were,” Cassie nods.

But it didn’t end when they left the shop. “The next day, when Tom woke up, I said: ‘Morning, Melanie’ and he said: ‘I told you yesterday! My name is Tom!’ It just went on from there.”

Cassie and I are sitting at the dining table in her home in the north-east, while Tom charges about in a Batman costume, brandishing a sword. Cassie, 30, is a single mother to Tom and his sister Carla, who’s just turned two. Side by side on the shelves near us are two framed photographs: on the left is Melanie in a white dress, with a cascade of blond ringlets; and on the right is Tom, still the same bright blue eyes, but with a boy’s short hair.

Tom loves dressing up. “Normally as a superhero,” Cassie says.

Cassie says she knows that Tom is very young to be transgender, but he is just one of a striking number of children who have been referred to the Tavistock and Portman NHS Trust’s Gender Identity Development Service in London over the past five years. A multidisciplinary clinic where all British transgender children are assessed, the service has seen referrals increase by 50% every year, from 97 new cases in 2009 to 697 in 2014. Young children such as Tom are unusual, but not rare: last year alone, close to 100 of those referred were aged 10 or younger.

theguardian.com/society/2015/sep/12/transgender-children-have-to-respect-who-he-is

 

[jediliz]

most two and a half year olds can’t speak clearly.

I doubt this story is true.

And if it is, Mom should not have encouraged it. She should have just considered it a phase.

If MELANIE said she wanted to be called Spot and start being treated like a dog, should Mom have said okay and start making her sleep in a dog house? Or feed her dog food? make her drink water from a dog bowl?

Where does it end?

 

[angell1]

most two and a half year olds can’t speak clearly.

I doubt this story is true. person is convinced beyond the shadow of a doubt that they are too fat, but the rest of us

And if it is, Mom should not have encouraged it. She should have just considered it a phase.

If MELANIE said she wanted to be called Spot and start being treated like a dog, should Mom have said okay and start making her sleep in a dog house? Or feed her dog food? make her drink water from a dog bowl?

Where does it end?

good example,

also I fit this in the category with something like anorexia. the person is convinced beyond a doubt that they are too fat but everyone else can see that this is not the case.

a girl can wear superhero costume and play with swords without being a boy

 

[Jelrak_TB]

When my oldest son was four he decided he was a lion. I did not think to make immediate inquiries with the zoo. Even though he was a lion for several days I was not fooled. In fact even when he chose to bite me after roaring like a lion I was not at all dismayed that my son had, in fact, become a lion…and twelve years later, to no one’s surprise at all, he is not a lion…he does not even roar…

Regards,

Jelrak TB

 

[1990Domer]

It seems like parenting transgender children is the new vogue thing to do. These parents do not realize the harm encouraging what seems like whims can eventually cause.

 

[Thorolfr]

It seems like parenting transgender children is the new vogue thing to do. These parents do not realize the harm encouraging what seems like whims can eventually cause.

Obviously being transgender is not a childhood whim since these people continue to identify as the opposite gender into adulthood.

 

[Allegra]

Obviously being transgender is not a childhood whim since these people continue to identify as the opposite gender into adulthood.

But the vast majority of them don’t. Do you have any idea how many little kids say they are or want to be boys or girls when they aren’t? It’s a completely normal phase and the vast majority grow out of it. It’s only when creepy parents try to place the characteristics of an adult sexual fetish on an prepubescent, impressionable child that we have people insisting their child is what they clearly are not and demanding that the world go along with it. There’s nothing wrong with a girl that likes Spiderman or even a girl who wants to pretend she’s a boy named Tom. What’s messed up is when a parents starts taking the child to a doctor and planning hormone manipulations and body mutilations. When I was a kid, people abhorred and fought against the mutilation of girl’s sexual organs. Now, it’s the newest fad to prove you are a “compassionate parent”.

 

[pianistclare]

People who do not care to parent should not be a parent.

 

[PolarGuy]

Since when is it a parent’s duty to make parenting decisions based solely on what the child wants?

Also, something I’m curious about: In the story, mom is single. Where’s Dad? And to what extent is Melanie’s behavior – and she’s Melanie, not Tom – is a function of Dad being gone? Just wondering.

 

[Thorolfr]

But the vast majority of them don’t. Do you have any idea how many little kids say they are or want to be boys or girls when they aren’t? It’s a completely normal phase and the vast majority grow out of it. It’s only when creepy parents try to place the characteristics of an adult sexual fetish on an prepubescent, impressionable child that we have people insisting their child is what they clearly are not and demanding that the world go along with it. There’s nothing wrong with a girl that likes Spiderman or even a girl who wants to pretend she’s a boy named Tom. What’s messed up is when a parents starts taking the child to a doctor and planning hormone manipulations and body mutilations. When I was a kid, people abhorred and fought against the mutilation of girl’s sexual organs. Now, it’s the newest fad to prove you are a “compassionate parent”.

Being transgender is not a new fad and it’s more than just a girl wanting to be Spiderman. There have been transgender people long before there were doctors around to give them hormones or do sex change operations. In the past, these people just suffered.

 

[Allegra]

Being transgender is not a new fad and it’s more than just a girl wanting to be Spiderman. There have been transgender people long before there were doctors around to give them hormones or do sex change operations. In the past, these people just suffered.

What’s new is assigning this adult fetish onto a child. And do you really think that a person who is genuinely obsessed with the idea that they are the wrong sex suddenly stops suffering because they put on lipstick and hose or have a cosmetic surgery to install a fake penis? There is no surgery or hormonal therapy that can truthfully alter a person’s sex. Even attempting to bully everyone else into going along with the delusion isn’t going to make someone with this delusion sane. Look up the statistics, if you doubt it. The prevalence of depression, mental illness, self harm, a

nd suicide of self-identified transgender people does not decrease post surgery. Society is barking up the wrong tree on this issue. These people don’t need the world to play along. They need real help getting over the delusion of being the wrong sex. At any rate, two-year-olds don’t need to be involved in this at all. If’ Melanie likes pretending she’s Spiderman or Tom, that’s fine. She doesn’t need a doctor. She needs her mom to teach her that it’s okay to pretend to be someone else, but she is loved for herself.

 

[Thorolfr]

At any rate, two-year-olds don’t need to be involved in this at all. If’ Melanie likes pretending she’s Spiderman or Tom, that’s fine. She doesn’t need a doctor. She needs her mom to teach her that it’s okay to pretend to be someone else, but she is loved for herself.

What if Melanie keeps insisting that everyone call her Tom and insists on having her hair cut like a boy and wants to wear boys clothing? Or should her parents insist the she have her hair long and wear dresses and play with dolls?

 

[1ke]

What if Melanie keeps insisting that everyone call her Tom

The child needs psychiatric services, not people who feed her with the notion she actually is a “he”. She is the female sex. There may be psychological or physical defects causing such thoughts and feelings, but denying reality and participating in this fiction is not helpful to the child.

and insists on having her hair cut like a boy and wants to wear boys clothing? Or should her parents insist the she have her hair long and wear dresses and play with dolls

Clothing, hair, and toy stereotypes aren’t the issue. II hope you do realize those are all stereotypes.

f the child wants to play superhero, etc., there is nothing wrong with that at all. Feeding the delusion that she is a he, there is plenty wrong with that.

 

[Allegra]

What if Melanie keeps insisting that everyone call her Tom and insists on having her hair cut like a boy and wants to wear boys clothing? Or should her parents insist the she have her hair long and wear dresses and play with dolls?

Her parent should insist that she use her real name and love and encourage her for who she is. It doesn’t matter how her hair is styled or what she wears. Clothing, hair, and toys don’t change a person’s sex. There is nothing wrong with a girl with short hair and Tonka trucks.

 

[Allegra]

PS- I used to have a 1st grade student who adamantly insisted that everyone call him “Pikachu”. Everyone ignored him. He is now a national merit finalist and has excepted that his name is “Austin” and he does not have the power to electrocute people. No doctors needed.

 

[1990Domer]

Obviously being transgender is not a childhood whim since these people continue to identify as the opposite gender into adulthood.

I highly doubt there is enough statistical evidence to support this claim.

 

[BornInMarch]

most two and a half year olds can’t speak clearly.

I doubt this story is true.

And if it is, Mom should not have encouraged it. She should have just considered it a phase.

If MELANIE said she wanted to be called Spot and start being treated like a dog, should Mom have said okay and start making her sleep in a dog house? Or feed her dog food? make her drink water from a dog bowl?

Where does it end?

If it’s not hurting anyone else, I don’t see what the problem is. After all, it’s not my life.

 

[1990Domer]

Being transgender is not a new fad and it’s more than just a girl wanting to be Spiderman. There have been transgender people long before there were doctors around to give them hormones or do sex change operations. In the past, these people just suffered.

And if I find the story I will post it…and that is despite becoming transgender, including different degrees of mutilation, these people still suffer from depression.

 

[1990Domer]

What if Melanie keeps insisting that everyone call her Tom and insists on having her hair cut like a boy and wants to wear boys clothing? Or should her parents insist the she have her hair long and wear dresses and play with dolls?

When my son was newly diagnosed with autism, he wanted to eat sand (an issue called pica). Did I allow that? No. I took him to therapies to learn how to eat. My son insisted on a LOT of things that were unhealthy. Prayer, courage and strength made him into the fine young man he’s growing up to be. I shutter to think where he would be if my husband and I didn’t guide him away from things that could harm him physically and emotionally.

 

[1990Domer]

If it’s not hurting anyone else, I don’t see what the problem is. After all, it’s not my life.

Eventually, there will be an uprising of special rights for transgender individuals. Gone will be the days of the single sex bathrooms.

It’s hurting the moral fiber of society. Does that not concern you a little?