M
MargaretMary3
Guest
I wasn’t sure where to post this, so I hope this forum is okay… the admins can move it elsewhere if it would be better suited in another forum.
I am a girl in my mid 20s. I am torn in choosing my state in life. When I seek counsel from close friends and trusted clergy I get vastly different answers: my family would prefer I marry (I am my parents only hope for grandchildren), and my friends all tell me that they see me as a great mother… and I do love children and the whole idea of family life. Priests and others in religious life have told me that they see in me a vocation to the religious life. I pray and pray but feel and think differently from one day to the next.
I met a wonderful Catholic man whom I thought I could marry one day, but I was afraid (a lifetime is loooong time to make someone else unhappy or be unhappy myself!) and broke things off with him. Almost immediately after, I deeply regretted it… but I am not the sort to go back on my decisions and it would be unfair to him to get his hopes up and then dash them again if I decided things would not work out. I was so sure of my decision beforehand. I did not always communicate well with him (I don’t communicate well with others, period… I am very introverted); and I thought this was a sign that I should end things because communication is so important in a marriage. But now I cannot decide if I feel terrible just for hurting his feelings, or if I feel terrible because I really do like him and could marry him.
So I thought that I, like St. Teresa of Avila, would force myself into a religious vocation. But I know that this will make my parents very sad. I also know that I do not desire a religious vocation for myself… I am afraid and worried that I would be unhappy/frustrated/etc.
At the suggestion of a close older friend/mentor, I made a pro/con list for marriage and for the nunnery. My pros and cons for marriage were about even, but I had many more cons than pros when I contemplated entering religious life… this somewhat undermines my resolve to force myself to enter religious life. But, I also don’t want to base the decision for my state in life off a pro/con list!
So, here I am, terrified to choose either marriage or the convent (the single life is definitely not for me), yet I must choose one and relatively soon… (most convents (or at least the ones I’d be attracted to) don’t accept applicants older than 30)
I went to Confession and mentioned my troubles to the priest, but while he gave counsel for my other sins he said nothing of my putting off choosing my state in life. I have an old confessor/spiritual director whom I have contacted to talk through my vocation troubles with, but he is very busy and currently out of town, so I am stuck waiting.
So, anyone else been through a similar dilemma?
How does one sort through what should be “dealbreakers” in a relationship and what things are not that important? I can’t decide if I globalized ‘problems’ into being more than what they were, or if I was justified in deciding that some things were “dealbreakers”.
I am a girl in my mid 20s. I am torn in choosing my state in life. When I seek counsel from close friends and trusted clergy I get vastly different answers: my family would prefer I marry (I am my parents only hope for grandchildren), and my friends all tell me that they see me as a great mother… and I do love children and the whole idea of family life. Priests and others in religious life have told me that they see in me a vocation to the religious life. I pray and pray but feel and think differently from one day to the next.
I met a wonderful Catholic man whom I thought I could marry one day, but I was afraid (a lifetime is loooong time to make someone else unhappy or be unhappy myself!) and broke things off with him. Almost immediately after, I deeply regretted it… but I am not the sort to go back on my decisions and it would be unfair to him to get his hopes up and then dash them again if I decided things would not work out. I was so sure of my decision beforehand. I did not always communicate well with him (I don’t communicate well with others, period… I am very introverted); and I thought this was a sign that I should end things because communication is so important in a marriage. But now I cannot decide if I feel terrible just for hurting his feelings, or if I feel terrible because I really do like him and could marry him.
So I thought that I, like St. Teresa of Avila, would force myself into a religious vocation. But I know that this will make my parents very sad. I also know that I do not desire a religious vocation for myself… I am afraid and worried that I would be unhappy/frustrated/etc.
At the suggestion of a close older friend/mentor, I made a pro/con list for marriage and for the nunnery. My pros and cons for marriage were about even, but I had many more cons than pros when I contemplated entering religious life… this somewhat undermines my resolve to force myself to enter religious life. But, I also don’t want to base the decision for my state in life off a pro/con list!
So, here I am, terrified to choose either marriage or the convent (the single life is definitely not for me), yet I must choose one and relatively soon… (most convents (or at least the ones I’d be attracted to) don’t accept applicants older than 30)
I went to Confession and mentioned my troubles to the priest, but while he gave counsel for my other sins he said nothing of my putting off choosing my state in life. I have an old confessor/spiritual director whom I have contacted to talk through my vocation troubles with, but he is very busy and currently out of town, so I am stuck waiting.
So, anyone else been through a similar dilemma?
How does one sort through what should be “dealbreakers” in a relationship and what things are not that important? I can’t decide if I globalized ‘problems’ into being more than what they were, or if I was justified in deciding that some things were “dealbreakers”.