TV: Jon & Kate + 8

[sweetcharity]

Hi Sweet Charity You are so right about that. Their body language truely has changed. I also wonder what the custody situation would be if they actually got a divorce. Jon would probably end up with the boys. Kate would end up with the younger girls. But I wonder what would happen to Maddie and Carra. I can’t imagine them being split up to make things even.

I suspect if there was a breakup, Kate would keep all 8 of the kids. She is way too much of a control freak to do otherwise.

I didn’t really pay that much attention to the show until this ‘scandal’ broke. Prior to this all I saw was a few minutes while late night channel surfing. The ‘watercooler’ chatter at work was always about the couch scenes and how far away Jon was sitting.

Over at the TLC channel’s website there are some upcoming couch scenes. At one point Kate says, “I love my job.” She does not make it clear what she ‘loves.’ Is it her job about being a wife and mother, or about being the ‘star’ of “Jon & Kate Plus 8”? I suspect she was referring to the show and not wife and motherhood.

I saw the end of one episode last night and the start of the second one. The first episodes featured Jon and boys on a boys day out. Jon took the boys golfing. On the couch Kate told all about what a wonderful day the boys had and how much fun Jon had with them. Jon, said, “–” Or something to that effect.

Then Kate talks about how it was going to be her turn next, but it’s going to be harder for her because Jon only had to take out 3 kids and she has to take 5 kids.

A bit over dramatic, there Kate. You can’t blame Jon for rolling his eyes so often. When I heard her say that, my eyes practically rolled right out of my head.

She then bitched (can I say that here because seriously it is the only word that fits) that she was taking the girls to a pottery class and that they were going to get dirty and how much she hates dirt yada yada yada. Then they proceeded to show prior scenes where she was yelling because a cookie crumb was dropped on the dinner table.

Then I turned the channel.

If Kate wants to keep her husband she better remember the world does not revolve around her needs and wants. Then again, that maybe the question of the season, does he want to keep her husband?

Kate needs to visit Dr. Phil. Not that I watch Dr. Phil, seriously, I promoise, all I’ve ever seen are the commercials.

 

[sanctamaria17]

Why is it funny? He’s correct.

Maybe kids cost so much in the U.S. if parents buy them everything they want, buy them everything new, own a house, own two cars (plus gas), etc. It really depends on where you live. The cost of living in rural Missouri, for example (where one of my friends lives) is a lot lower than living in a Connecticut suburb of New York City (where I grew up). Even so, doesn’t stop a lot of Irish/Italian Catholic families from having five or six kids in my town and they’re a lot more green and frugal than a lot of families I know with two!

I really love how the people who cry, “don’t judge us for wanting no kids,” feel the need to be condescending and act like they know everything a family needs if they don’t have one themselves. I also love how the “women’s choice” crowd then belittles women who do choose to marry and have kids, no matter their education level. Really? Choice? Don’t judge? Then don’t do what you claim to condemn!

I do feel bad for the turn Jon and Kate’s lives have taken. I think it’s got to be stressful and it probably is hard for Kate to take care of so many children of the same age, not to mention she used to work outside the home, so it’s probably harder not having that adult interaction. It’s probably hard for Jon as well, to come home exhausted from work and have a very stressed wife and hyper kids coming at you. Also, I do find that Kate can get very biting, but at the same time, I don’t feel I’m in a position to judge either of them.

As for the comments on women and snarky behavior well, Michelle Duggar is sweet, but not all women are meant to be like Michelle Duggar. Heck, we have quite a few women saints with a very droll sense of humor and a good sense of sarcasm. One of my friends and I are extremely snarky with each other but it’s all in good nature and we wouldn’t be that way around each other if we knew the other couldn’t take it. Same with me and my father and mother.

 

[st_lucy]

It doesn’t matter if you’re debt free. What matters is your annual salary. The average child costs anywhere from 10 to 20 thousand dollars a year (source: babycenter.com). 16 kids would require a moderate 6-figure salary, which not many people take home. It’s fiscally irresponsible to have 16 kids on a 80000 dollar salary.

This has got to be the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of. I mean really. Are you serious

 

[aimee]

In the beginning, when Jon and Kate did their interviews, they sat close to each other and
smiled at one another. After several seasons they began to lean away from each other, and Jon would say a lot of unkind things about Kate. Kate started to say unkind things about Jon. The smiling stopped and the quirky, funny Kate disappeared. She seemed to feel that all the family responsibilities were dumped on her, while Jon was quietly off doing his own thing with one or two of the kids. While he was away from her, he would make somewhat derogatory remarks about her. She in turn became more rigid and demanding, while Jon was off in another room smirking or rolling his eyes.
There were 4 shows left in the last season when Jon was caught in a bar with a female athletic team. This second time could be to hype the new season. It is so sad. I feel sorry for the children. They have to wonder what’s going on. No matter how hard they try to shield these kids, the kids are going to be the losers in all of this.

:coffeeread: Don’t forget her friendship with her bodyguard

 

[dixieagle]

I think that, after watching tonight’s episode, I want - in all charity - to knock Jon and Kate’s heads together while shouting “You’ve got 8 kids…grow up and start acting like adults!”

I think that it’s past time to quit the show and concentrate on real life and their responsibilities to each other and those children.

 

[a_priori]

Just watched the new episode. Very sad.

 

[Irish_Kathy]

I think that, after watching tonight’s episode, I want - in all charity - to knock Jon and Kate’s heads together while shouting “You’ve got 8 kids…grow up and start acting like adults!”

I think that it’s past time to quit the show and concentrate on real life and their responsibilities to each other and those children.

Hi Dixieagle That wouldn’t be bad advice. It is so sad the direction their relationship has gone, especially lately. My Mom even noticed that they ignored each other when they first saw each other at the birthday party.

 

[ConcernedApathy]

Given the way Kate treats Jon on the show, the miracle is that they’ve lasted this long. Three seasons ago, I watched a few episodes and commented to my husband, “Well, it won’t be long before it’s Jon Minus Kate Plus Eight”.

I just can’t wrap my head around disrespecting and condescending to my husband like that on national television. Why/how could you do that to the man you love? Mind you, I’m not saying that he doesn’t have faults of his own. Just that her treatment of him on TV is a terrible example of how married people should treat each other. It won’t surprise me at all if they break up for good. It’s sad.

For what its worth I’ve watched this couple before they even had a show. Over the years I’ve seen 8 kids growing up and changing and learning. I’ve seen Kate become a capable, less neurotic and even more loving mother as she gracefully carries quite a load on her shoulders.

The only one who hasn’t changed or evolved, or grown up or learned anything is Jon. He started off as a childish, irresponsible slug of a man and that’s just where he is today. When someone has to yell at you to take the kids hands, to remember the kids shoes, to make sure they don’t run into the street, to just be a helpful, attentive, caring father, the villain isn’t the one doing the yelling. He has proven himself (and again I’m just going by what we see on the show, obviously I have no idea what happens when the cameras are off) to be totally unwilling to do his share. He doesn’t deserve to be revered or respected if he hasn’t earned it and he hasn’t. Considering his behavior (and I’m not even talking about the possible cheating) I think she has shown remarkable restraint.

She deserves better and so do their kids.

 

[Galnextdoor]

It’s interesting that Kate arranged the birthday party and Jon grumbled because she forgot the cakes at home. I find it interesting that Kate says she’s not going anywhere and she’s going to be there for her kids etc. Jon, on other hand, says he doesn’t know what he’s going to do. He said he will get together and act cordial for the children’s sake. As an after thought he said will do whatever needs to be done for the kids sake.

It’s interesting that he considers it an option to walk away. I think it’s indicative of his immaturity. At one point he said, “I got married at 22, had twins by the time I was 23 and had 8 kids by the time I was twenty-seven. I had no choice. I had a life and a job. Now, I don’t work. I just have the kids.” That sounds like a self-pity party to me.
What do you think?

 

[st_lucy]

I most say that Kate really showed a lot of strength in last nights episode. I was very sad that Jon didn’t seem to care about his family. I have Kate in a totally different light right now. I agree they need to drop this show and work on their family. Jon needs to grow up and stop whining about Kate working.

 

[JLCecilia]

After last night’s episode, my opinion of Kate has changed somewhat. I still say that no matter what the circumstances, she has no “right” to talk to or treat Jon the way she does, but I can certainly sympathize.

I think it’s a viscious cycle. I know from my own experience that when DH lets me down in one way or another and I don’t feel like I can count on him, I am much shorter w/ the kids and over the most minute, insignificant things. That being said, when she lashes out at Jon, it makes him only want to retreat further away and help even less and the cycle just deepens and worsens.

They keep saying they’ll do all they can for the sake of the kids . . .really? Does mending your marriage and relationship fit in the equation anywhere? I really shouldn’t say that, they’re in what’s probably the most difficult phase of this whole thing. I will say though that Jon didn’t seem too affectionate with the kids at the party. It was my impression that he wasn’t really in the picture any more, but if he really is resentful about having to shoulder a majority of the burden of childcare on his own while Kate’s on the road, that could explain his attitude towards the kids. I could easily see him walking away without shedding a tear.

 

[TracyJ]

I liked it at first.

Now I can’t imagine why Jon hasn’t buried her in a shallow grave-- justifiable homicide, for certain.

Did you see her hissy fit when she realized the cleaning woman hadn’t dusted the baseboard behind the bookcase?

Okay, Sam, you made your post LONG ago and much has transpired since then.

However, I wanted to say that Kate’s not THAT clean, she allowed her kids to eat pudding
that had been used to “paint” with with brushes and their hands.
She pottytrained them on national TV and not ONCE did I see her emphasize that we
WASH OUR HANDS after we use the facilities.
Finally, she made edible play doh, the kids didn’t wash their hands first, put the playdoh
on the table (germy table) squashed and punched it and then ate it!
I didn’t get that hissy fit either, but if she wrote out instructions and stated that the items
should be removed from the bookcase, dusted and returned and while you’re at it make
sure that the baseboard in back in bookcase gets a dusting as well, then she had a legitimate gripe.
When I have housecleaning help I always have them follow me around the first day and
OBSERVE while I do the cleaning in the way I want THEM to do it.
The language barrier has nothing to do with anything.

 

[TracyJ]

After last night’s episode, my opinion of Kate has changed somewhat. I still say that no matter what the circumstances, she has no “right” to talk to or treat Jon the way she does, but I can certainly sympathize.

I think it’s a viscious cycle. I know from my own experience that when DH lets me down in one way or another and I don’t feel like I can count on him, I am much shorter w/ the kids and over the most minute, insignificant things. That being said, when she lashes out at Jon, it makes him only want to retreat further away and help even less and the cycle just deepens and worsens.

They keep saying they’ll do all they can for the sake of the kids . . .really? Does mending your marriage and relationship fit in the equation anywhere? I really shouldn’t say that, they’re in what’s probably the most difficult phase of this whole thing. I will say though that Jon didn’t seem too affectionate with the kids at the party. It was my impression that he wasn’t really in the picture any more, but if he really is resentful about having to shoulder a majority of the burden of childcare on his own while Kate’s on the road, that could explain his attitude towards the kids. I could easily see him walking away without shedding a tear.

BUT, why oh why do SOME men ALWAYS have to have the next woman lined up before
they sever the relationship with their current woman? How cowardly!
In this situation I’m on Jon’s side-I’ve watched and heard Kate slowly erode his self
esteem and his manhood with her mouth, but I wish that he had found a different way to
make his gripes known, now there’s another woman, another personality in on this and
she will severely complicate the situation.
Kate puts me in mind of Martha Stewart in some ways, she looks beautiful, keeps a clean well decorated house and takes care of her kids, but she can’t keep her man happy.

 

[TracyJ]

It’s interesting that Kate arranged the birthday party and Jon grumbled because she forgot the cakes at home. I find it interesting that Kate says she’s not going anywhere and she’s going to be there for her kids etc. Jon, on other hand, says he doesn’t know what he’s going to do. He said he will get together and act cordial for the children’s sake. As an after thought he said will do whatever needs to be done for the kids sake.

It’s interesting that he considers it an option to walk away. I think it’s indicative of his immaturity. At one point he said, “I got married at 22, had twins by the time I was 23 and had 8 kids by the time I was twenty-seven. I had no choice. I had a life and a job. Now, I don’t work. I just have the kids.” That sounds like a self-pity party to me.
What do you think?

I think that it’s a self pity party, too, BUT, when she went away on the book tour and left her man alone with the children even with help I think that he got lonely and made some
poor choices.
Even the best housekeeper in the world and the finest Nanny cannot take the place of
your spouse. When a man feels lonely and disrespected he’s vulnerable to poor
decisions.
Both of these parents have a lot of pride and it’s hard for them to admit their own
mistakes from the heart, I just hope that their spiritual counselor is strong enough to
make them both aware of how essential they are to their children and how their own pride
and unwillingness to forgive the trespasses of the other may be catalyst for ending their
marriage. The parents tend to make decisions without “if-then” thinking. I don’t think
they have the slightest notion of how HARD divorce is on children, or how expensive it is
or how damaging the process is to one’s OWN self esteem.

 

[TracyJ]

This has got to be the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of. I mean really. Are you serious

Oh, I agree with the other poster. Besides that making fiscally responsible decisions when it comes to your family is nothing to roll your eyes over! It’s wise.

 

[TracyJ]

So what’s the point of even having a thread if the only thing we are allowed to post is ‘Golly I love them! Love them so much!!’?

I’m not judging how she treats the kids-- you guessed it, I don’t have sextuplets! Surprise! though it’s pretty clear that a couple of them would like a lot more attention than they get.

I AM judging how she treats her husband and others, though: relentlessly mocking, negative, nagging. She uses her struggles with the kids as a license to treat all those around her badly.

One of the worst things a wife can do is to disrespect her husband in public. I didn’t think that she was engaging in “good natured ribbing”, I saw her words as cutting and rude and publicly humiliating to Jon. I think that he’s a patient man and when she yelled at him in the toy store I found his response very interesting, he said “I know that you’re a better person than that”,
No one likes to be disrespected, especially by someone that you love.

 

[TracyJ]

**
QuietTimes,

I agree w/ you 100%!! My DD is only 6, she BEGS to help out w/ the 1 year old. She sometimes will do things for him even when I am right there and she will tell me, “no mom!! Let me do it for him!”

Some people would be amazed at how responsiblities put upon a sibling really does make them feel so good about themselves, not to mention they grow up knowing to care for others, instead of just for themselves.
I was from a family of 9 kids. My parents separated when I was 13. I helped out more than most kids my age did. Did it kill me? Nope. Did I learn how to do things for others that I wouldn’t have learned if there were only 3 kids (and mom wouldn’t have needed my help then!)? Yep, sure did! **

But when you were raising your siblings you got to be the Big Shot, the Authority Figure.
Sure, you loved that, but the younger siblings were denied access to the true authority
figure, meaning your mom.
I don’t believe that older siblings are qualified to take over the role of parent, even though they LOVE doing it, it’s damaging to the younger ones.
BTW, I don’t think that Kate does this at all, she’s clearly the mother and Maddy and Cara are the big sisters.
However, I don’t think that Kate would automatically be awarded the children in the case of a divorce, there’s nothing that she does for her children that their father couldn’t do.

 

[petitfleur]

I must say I do see Kate in different light too and have a new respect for her. I dont agree with how she treated Jon, but I admire her strength. Jon acted like a baby in the episode.

 

[shannyk]

I think Jon and Kate are getting what they need, a dose of reality. They need to stop, reevaluate, regroup, and get their priorities straight.

Kate is a perfectionist and that is a driving force in her families problems. She seems unwilling and unable to accept anything less than he warped view of what ‘should’ be. She needs to realize this isn’t at all ‘normal’ family life.

Jon seems a willing doormat. Neither is better than the other. I have to say in many of the candid moments on the show, he is equally snarky and rude. I think when they are being interviewed Kate looks like the ogre and Jon puts on a good show.

I feel bad for them, they have really succumbed to the allure of all things material.

 

[st_lucy]

It doesn’t matter if you’re debt free. What matters is your annual salary. The average child costs anywhere from 10 to 20 thousand dollars a year (source: babycenter.com). 16 kids would require a moderate 6-figure salary, which not many people take home. It’s fiscally irresponsible to have 16 kids on a 80000 dollar salary.

Oh, I agree with the other poster. Besides that making fiscally responsible decisions when it comes to your family is nothing to roll your eyes over! It’s wise.

Are you serious, you think that one should not have x amount of kids if they make x amount of money? God provides and I know a heck of a lot of people who have 8+ kids and live on one celery. It is ridiculous that one would look at babycenter.com or any other similar source to determine their family size. Remember anything can happen to any family at any time and if you are sitting around relying on these grubbers to figure out your future than you have some major problems.