Two Hardcore Videoed EWTN Homilies on How to Dress/Act for Mass

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CoffeeAndDonuts said:
I’m a big fan of H&M myself. You ever check out AliExpress? You can get some good deals on there and there’s a huge array of options.

Heh, this is very quickly turning into lady’s fashion chat
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I won’t say that I always (or even often) wear them, but I own two long tiered elastic waist skirts, one black, one navy. It’s a very versatile garment, if not formal-looking

When I got the black one on Amazon, I noticed that it was being marked as Hajj wear for Muslim pilgrims.
 
You most likely need to go the women’s department rather than the junior. I assure you will find appropriate and fitting clothing. You can even have your clothing altered to suit you. It’s not hard to find a professional seamstress or tailor. Shop in the best stores you can afford. Be willing to have fewer clothes that are quality rather than a lot that look cheep.

There is no reason a woman can’t dress modestly with the choices out there. I would much rather have the respect from being ladylike than for any clothing I wear.

I work in a professional setting and I have the standard dress pants and change it up with different tops, sweaters, or jackets.

Everything I have was purchased in the last 16 years as I lost all my belongings in a house fire in 2001. But I have bought nice classic items in some better thrift stores.
 
I have this lovely pinkish red long skirt I wear from time to time. It’s pleated though, so it looks a bit awkward with nearly every top I have.
 
How awful that you lost everything in fire. That’s always been a distinct fear of mine. What would you say is your favorite period though, style-wise? I love 40s-50s sort of style, but it sort of feels more like a costume more than actual street wear though.
 
Boler said:
I don’t know what a “slim top” means. Might be fine. Might involve cleavage. Regardless, there’s this wonderful invention called a light jacket, or light sweater, or other simple item of clothing, fits nicely in a car, can be thrown in the back seat.
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You think that a “light sweater” hides the fact that a woman is busty?

Funny!
 
I found a store north of Los Angeles that has some lovely period clothing. Probably similar shops elsewhere. Renaissance clothing might also get you some matching tops.

I don’t have too much trouble. I’m old enough so that phase of my life is past.

Blessings, Stephie
 
It’s nice to know that there are so many people out there who think they know what is best for others.🤨

Modesty, like “traditionalism” is a continuum. I find a sharp dressed man to be a “turn on”, so now you all know. That means no suits for Church, lest you scandalize me.😏
 
There is no reason a woman can’t dress modestly with the choices out there. I would much rather have the respect from being ladylike than for any clothing I wear.
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In my home – we have taught our boys to be respectful towards women. They will open/hold the door open for a girl/woman wearing a long skirt/short skirt/pants/shorts/etc. To be courteous. Another thing we made clear to them – that a girl/women --that was not acting perfectly ladylike – was not an open door for them to be dis-respectful.
 
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Duesenberg said:
Right. let’s try to apply a drastic extreme to everyone.
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There are a lot of naturally busty women out there–it’s not unusual for women.

Thanks to weight gain and babies, I’m big on top myself and have gone from B to tavern wench over the last 20 years. I’ve given up on v-necks, as they all look trampy on me, no matter how small the v. Also, thanks to the fact that Baby Girl used to yank on my neckline and stretch out my tops, I’ve had crewneck tops (you know, the kind of shirt that goes right to the neck) start showing cleavage. I do not have an unlimited clothing budget, so if that happens, I keep wearing it until it wears out. Other than that, I manage coverage, but it is definitely a challenge to dress myself attractively on a budget–and some people would probably say I’ve obviously given up.

I buy nearly all of my husband’s work clothes and am pretty clear on the fact that it is much easier it is to find suitable men’s clothing. Given how much less standardized women’s clothes are, it would be nice to get a bit more consideration from the menfolk as to how difficult it is for women to dress appropriately for their figures.
 
CilladeRoma said:
Modesty, like “traditionalism” is a continuum. I find a sharp dressed man to be a “turn on”, so now you all know.
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Being a “turn-off” to you is a world from someone dressing immodestly for Mass.

It’s ridiculous to suggest one could “scandalize” another by dressing too formally for Mass. It might personally offend them, but “scandalize”? That’s absurd.
 
CilladeRoma said:
Modesty, like “traditionalism” is a continuum. I find a sharp dressed man to be a “turn on”, so now you all know. That means no suits for Church, lest you scandalize me.
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Yeah, I don’t get posts like yours. Is the point you’re trying to make that modesty is relative and therefore moot? I don’t agree. Nor do I agree that it’s merely a perspective of tastes as in:
CilladeRoma said:
I find a sharp dressed man to be a “turn on”
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This isn’t about personal fetishes, it’s about modest dress which, although has some relation to culture, is also objectively linked to human physiology.

And a note about culture: that a particular style of dressing is acceptable in modern culture is a lame argument.
CilladeRoma said:
That means no suits for Church, lest you scandalize me.😏
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I don’t think it’s right for you to so blithely disregard the topic. Did you read the quote from the Catechism? Did the saints regard the topic as you do?
 
My thoughts on this:
  1. There is no piece of cloth that symbolize modesty by itself without the person wearing it. We should stop discussing pieces of cloth. The answer to “is this modest” will always be “it depends”.
  2. I have a huge problem with men who are sooooo disturbed by women “leading them to sinful thoughts with their dress”. You notice a women´s breasts? well, ok, noticed, go on with your thoughts. The border for sensual thoughts is changable, 1850 a women´s bare feet was considered lustful to look at, in the UAE a women´s hands are by some standards enough to attract men. Guess what? I beliefe all those men don´t lie when they say they are tempted. But their culture reacts only in setting the border for attraction lower and lower. This is no solution. A proper mind should “endure” a women with breast and hips and everything else without freaking out.
  3. This whole vintage thing…makes me feel mixed. I like the 40´s glam clothing as well, but there is more behind this topic when it comes to super conservative men who highly support those styles. I noticed that the far right movement where I live idealize this time in style and clothing of the women very much, this is not for no reason. There is a differnce between vintage lovers and people who can´t settle in the time they were born into because “in grandpa´s time women were more humble/devout/etc”. Those people make me afraid, and sadly, I see them alot in the chruch, too.
 
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Boler said:
This isn’t about personal fetishes, it’s about modest dress which, although has some relation to culture, is also objectively linked to human physiology.
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This is not just a “personal fetish.” It’s really more common than not for women to think that men in nice suits are sexy. It’s certainly more common than thinking that men in shorts and tank tops are sexy.
 
Oh, absolutely. Like ZZ Top said, girls go crazy bout a sharp dressed man.
 
alice24 said:
The border for sensual thoughts is changable, 1850 a women´s bare feet was considered lustful to look at, in the UAE a women´s hands are by some standards enough to attract men. Guess what? I beliefe all those men don´t lie when they say they are tempted. But their culture reacts only in setting the border for attraction lower and lower. This is no solution. A proper mind should “endure” a women with breast and hips and everything else without freaking out.
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And interestingly, there have been past times where women popping a breast out to feed a baby in public was much more accepted than it is in contemporary America.

 
No, red herring is more accurate.

“What about women breastfeeding?”
“What about women used to not show their ankles?”
“What about men in suits are sexy?”
“What about the cultural norms?”
“What about the availability of clothing?”

Pretty sad. And telling.
 
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This. In some areas, people simply don´t have the space for strict “modesty opinions” as “I don´t breastfeed my children in public” because livin conditions wouldn´t accept this.
 
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