upset with SIL

  • Thread starter Thread starter Pinkyyy
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I don’t understand your decision to delay the baptism to include someone who obviously doesn’t like you but that was your choice. In a way by doing so you were sort of enabling her to disrespect you by showing her you would go out of your way to accomidate her schedule by so much as a year. :rolleyes: As to the outfit well you could have disregarded it and purchased something more to your taste. Especially after her pior behavior. The next time she starts acting out, talking about you or showing disrespect I would leave and say a prayer for her or tell her plainly to look to her own problems before raving about yours which are non of her business and include a promise to pray for her. People will only treate you as bad as you let them. If you put you foot down and demand respect sometimes that works. Not all the time but at the least the person knows your not a doormat to be trampled on. I’ve had issues with this sort of behavior in my family and putting your foot down and not tolerating rude behavior is the only thing that ever works with lots of praying included. :cool:
 
Sierrah said:
I don’t understand your decision to delay the baptism to include someone who obviously doesn’t like you but that was your choice. In a way by doing so you were sort of enabling her to disrespect you by showing her you would go out of your way to accomidate her schedule by so much as a year. :rolleyes: As to the outfit well you could have disregarded it and purchased something more to your taste.
People will only treate you as bad as you let them.
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Both of these things popped into my head as well…WHY would someone delay the baptism of their child for over a year because of someone who obviously couldn’t care less about it? OP, for future reference, don’t give people so much power to mess up your life and treat you badly.
 
duskyjewel said:
Both of these things popped into my head as well…WHY would someone delay the baptism of their child for over a year because of someone who obviously couldn’t care less about it? OP, for future reference, don’t give people so much power to mess up your life and treat you badly.
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My guess- because the OP is young and was trying for “family unity”. Hopefully, Pinkyyy now knows the difference between fantasy and reality.🙂
 
I think you are thinking too much about it. If this is the biggest problem you have well- your doing good. I think Sarah is right and forgiveness doesnt mean you have to like the person. It is not a feeling either. It is a decision. The more you dwell on this the worse you will feel about it. try to look at the positive like others said. You made the decision to wait. You made the decision to use the outfit. You need to remove your expectations of her and accept her for who she is (an obviously unhappy person who seems to live without God) What can be worse than that???
Remember every time you pray the Our Father …Forgive us our tresspasses AS we forgive others…:eek: I hope God forgives me better than that some times.
 
I am very curious to know when your SIL said those things about you and your marriage what was your husbands response to her.

I am sorry to say this but I have to. I know that you are angry with her for giving you a cheap outfit for your precious baby’s christening but you need to get over it and let it go. There is nothing that you can do about it that will make it right.

I know how you feel right now and you are angry. And you need to tell hubby how you feel that you are very disappointed. Let me tell you a story a month ago my daughter went to her Aunty’s wedding. My son and I did not go first of all it is my ex’s sister and his family insisted I come and so on and so on but I refused. As my ex was taking his 21 year old girlfriend that broke up our 13 years marriage when he cheated on me and got this girl pregnant. Anyway the MIL gave up her bedroom for the girl and him to sleep in. They are not married we are divorced 6 months and seperated 1 year 6 months. You had to show off your girlfriend and dress her up so that the family can see that you did better this time by getting a slim and trim 21 year old not like your fat ex wife. The family welcomed her after telling me that they will never except this girl after what part she played in the breakup of the marriage.

To top it all off my MIL asked me to buy and outfit for her to wear to the wedding. Which I did not as I had not received child support for a while. Then my SIL who was supposed to be my friend stabbed me in the back and was her biggest friend she still had a nerve to call me and tell me that this girl is not so bad and the child is so cute. After she said that she did not think that the baby was her brothers. Now the child looks like one of her children. And then when I last saw her she was telling me that finance was low and with the 4 kids she had things were tough. And here was I feeling sorry and went to buy her food and also a nice expensive hand bag for the wedding.

So you know what you are better off staying far away from the in laws especially the SIL. Look what mine did to me so you know what get over what she did. And move on and tell your hubby that you hope that you guys are not going to stay with them because you would not feel comfortable staying there. Be honest with him and let him know how you feel.
 
I would be very careful on what you say to DH if you talk to him about it becuasse it could come off as very petty and mean spirited on your part. Have had ridiculouse problems with my MIL for the most part my DH has stood up for me, however, a few weeks before they come visit us I panic and project bad things(they are comeing in about 5 weeks) and I start getting petty i know it annoys my DH and I need to just keep my mouth shut.:cool:
 
SarahR said:
Important: alcoholic, abusive BIL.

Everything else seemed pretty petty, honestly. You could have used whatever baptism outfit you wanted. You chose to use the one from her, whether it is from Wal-Mart, Nordstroms, or a box from their garage. Why on earth would you delay a baptism just to include some people you don’t even get along with? And she runs her mouth and tells people bogus things about your marriage…some people are like that. It totally stinks and it’s not right, but in the great scheme of things, even that is not such a big deal (((sorry just my opinion))). It’s her problem (not yours) if she’s like that.

De-tangle yourself. These other things need not waste your energy.

Put your energy into your marriage, spiritual life, your family. You can only direct yourself, not one single ounce of what SIL does. Choose to not let her get under your skin. You really can choose it, too. You can only control you.

Someone like that really isn’t worth the energy to dwell on it.

Blessings to you!!!
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:clapping: :clapping: :clapping:

This, is wisdom.
 
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