Validity of choosing to confess to a less than stellar priest

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JAmoros

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In my area, the priests who are easiest for me to go to for confession are members of the Paulist Fathers, and they aren’t the most orthodox or “on fire” confessors. They do follow the form of the sacrament properly, but they don’t offer much counsel and can be dismissive of whether an act is very sinful or not. I’m growing more uncomfortable going to them because of this lack of sincere focus on the purpose of the sacrament. I just feel like I’m getting off easy in terms of penance and the priest’s understanding of the weight of my sin. At the same time, my understanding is that if I am in the state of mortal sin it is my duty to go to confession at the earliest possible opportunity, which would almost always be with the Paulist priests, which could be tempting for the right reasons as well as the wrong ones. I don’t feel like I can have real contraction in their confessional. Do I incur any responsibility in this situation? Would my choice of going to an easier confessor in any way affect the validity of the sacrament?
 
The priest is given the power by God to hear your confession and absolve you, regardless of whether you think he’s being harsh enough or giving enough counseling or seeing your sins as gravely as you do. The priest is not required to offer any counsel at all in the confessional. He could easily listen to your whole confession, say “Uh-huh” and proceed with the words of absolution and give you a tiny penance or no penance at all and it would be just as “valid” as if he spent a full hour lecturing you and then gave you a penance of 20 Rosaries said kneeling on a rock.

If you have a mortal sin on your soul then I would think you would want to get rid of it as soon as possible since you might get hit by a bus and die before you can find a priest who meets your standards of rigor. You’re not going there to get counseling from the priest or to get a heavy duty penance (plus, you are quite free to impose as much extra penance on yourself as you think you need, within reason, like no self-flagellation). You are going to confession to receive absolution and God’s grace.

Bottom line is, the priest’s approach to confession has nothing to do with validity of confession, as long as he meets all the requirements to be a priest allowed to hear confessions in that diocese, and he follows the required form of confession (you speak your sins out loud, he uses the proper words of absolution, etc.)
 
You’re concerns are not something new. Christians over the centuries have struggled with similar concerns. That’s one great thing about having the Magisterium: when it teaches things definitively, we can fully trust that it is free from error.

It so happens that, in the fourth century AD, the Church in Carthage began to veer into heretical territory when the ideas of a certain bishop, Donatus Magnus, came en vogue. He erroneously taught that the validity and efficacy of the sacraments depended on the sanctity and faithfulness of the clergy. This became known as the Donatist heresy, and great Saints such as St. Augustine of Hippo fought against this error. The Fathers if the Council of Trent also condemned this heresy with their dogmatic statements on the efficacy of the sacraments independent of the worth of the priest or bishop.

As far as your concerns about going to an easy confessor: welcome to humanity. We often seek the path that has the fewest obstacles. Don’t forget the purpose of confession: absolution and restoration of communion with God. Penances are given at the mercy of the confessor. In fact, ANY penance is a mercy because it will never be enough to outweigh the gravity of a mortal sin against an all-loving God. If you want to take on extra penance out of devotion, go ahead. But as far as satisfying your obligation after a confession, trust your confessor.

So my advice would be to continue to confess to these priests and trust that Our Lord’s forgiveness is there.
 
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JAmoros said:
Would my choice of going to an easier confessor in any way affect the validity of the sacrament?
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“Easier” is subjective, and has nothing to do with the validity of the sacrament. Our Lord, at our time of death, is unlikely to say our sins are somehow less forgiven because we sought out, or received a sacrament from and “easier priest”, so I don’t expect the act will jeopardize our salvation or add to time in Purgatory.

We need not rank priests. The priest is either ordained and in full communion with the Church or he is not. If he is, all sacraments he administered are valid.

The righteousness of our priests are not gauged on a 5 star approval rating, number of likes, or Yelp reviews…thank goodness!
 
Do you believe in fate of God? Maybe you personally need the softer confessor coming your way and this may be an answer from God.
 
The efficacy of your confession is not dependent on the faithfulness of the priest. You are absolved of your sin by virtue of what Christ accomplished on the cross and on Easter, not on the merits of the priest.
 
It is what it is. I have very few good confessors to choose from. But the sacrament is the sacrament. The confession is valid. I look at it this way. My conscience is formed far better than the priest I am confessing to (in most cases) so I’m not seeking counseling or advice. And honestly that isn’t the role of s confessor in this day and age. I’ve properly judged my mortal sins and seek absolution. So if my confessor doesnt understand the theology behind the sin that’s ok. That’s my job.
 
JAmoros said:
In my area, the priests who are easiest for me to go to for confession are members of the Paulist Fathers, and they aren’t the most orthodox or “on fire” confessors. They do follow the form of the sacrament properly, but they don’t offer much counsel and can be dismissive of whether an act is very sinful or not.
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None of this effects the validity of the Sacrament.
JAmoros said:
I just feel like I’m getting off easy in terms of penance and the priest’s understanding of the weight of my sin.
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What do you want, the Priest to refuse absolution? To tell you that you must throw yourself in thornbushes as penance? To tell you how disgusted he is with you? It is your job to tell him what a bad person you are, and his job to tell you how great God is.
JAmoros said:
I don’t feel like I can have real contraction in their confessional. Do I incur any responsibility in this situation? Would my choice of going to an easier confessor in any way affect the validity of the sacrament?
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I think you mean “contrition”, btw. Feelings have nothing to do with it. As long as you have a purpose of amendment, you can “feel” however you want in the confessional. You are allowed to go to any validly ordained Priest who has the faculties to hear confessions by their Ordinary or Bishop.

Some people only go to a certain Priest (in fact, for certain people, this is very important—people who suffer from scrupulosity should only confess to one Priest). Some people deliberately go to different Churches than their regular Parish for confession or try to avoid certain Priests. Some go on days they know a certain Priest they are comfortable with is going to be “in the box”.
 
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The sacrament is valid, regardless of the perceived holiness or orthodoxy of the priest in question.

Unless the priest refuses to say the proper words of absolution: “I absolve you in the name of the Father… etc.
 
  1. All ordained priests have the authority to absolve you - that is the point.
  2. “Getting off easy” is a sign of God’s mercy. Do you want God to be tougher on you?
  3. Are you praying for the priests? They do penance for YOUR sin.
  4. The Sacrament is not better or more spiritual if your personal preferences are met.
  5. Do not over-think this.
 
Thanks for the reply, especially your point about the donatists. You also make a good reminder about the purpose and role of penance as a grace form God to grow closer to Him. I often fall into the mistake of seeing penance as factoring into forgiveness, when, like you say, we can never do enough to earn God’s mercy.
 
You see and hear the priest, but don’t forget that Jesus is there too. Don’t let the circumstances distract you. When you encounter Jesus at Confession, or in the Eucharist, or in prayer, give him all your love.

In this Sunday’s Gospel, Jesus asks Peter one thing. He doesn’t ask “Why did you deny me three times?” or “Do you think you’re good enough?” He asks “Do you love me?” And Peter answers “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”

May each of us, led by his Word and aided by his active grace, be always ready to answer with confidence and hope, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”
 
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Was with you till you turned the absolution into an incantation rather than a proclamation of the gospel subjectively applied to the recipient.
 
If you have a mortal sin, don’t be like me. I chose to go the priest I felt the most comfortable with, I should have focused on getting that mortal sin off of my soul. If your just confessing venial sins, then you could go to whoever you want to. Luckily for us the validity of our confession does not depend on how faithful the priest is or the counsel or penance he give us. As long as the required form for confession is used, the confession is valid. If you need advice, just make an appointment with your parish priest or another trusted one.
 
Hodos said:
Was with you till you turned the absolution into an incantation rather than a proclamation of the gospel subjectively applied to the recipient.
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The words of absolution are not an incantation, but they are necessary. And if I went to a priest who did not say the proper formula of absolution, that would be very good reason for me to avoid going to confession with that particular priest again.
 
CTBcin said:
The words of absolution are not an incantation, but they are necessary. And if I went to a priest who did not say the proper formula of absolution, that would be very good reason for me to avoid going to confession with that particular priest again.
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Glad to hear you say its not formulaic, although you kind of went right back to that. Are you taking that stance just because it would make you question whether the priest is faithfully discharging his office or whether you think the absolution is efficacious? Just trying to figure out where you are coming from. In other words, are you saying that because it is the wording that makes the absolution efficacious or because you would not prefer to have a priest who appears to be unknowledgeable about his office? Hope that makes sense. If the latter, then i kind of understand where you are coming from.

My understanding of rites of confession and absolution (take it with a grain of salt) is that these provide a way to proclaim God’s grace so that the sinner knows and receives the word of God that God’s forgiveness has in fact been given to them. The purpose of that is to ease their conscience and allow them to go in the confidence that their sin is forgiven.
 
As long as they where ordained vaildly they can here your confession, even if your wrong in that assumption your confession is still valid
 
There is a proper form of absolution in the Roman Rite for absolution. Failure to use the words “I absolve you” or “I absolve thee” or (in Latin)" ego te absolvo can call into question the validity of the Sacrament.

The current formula in English, in it’s entirety is:
God, the Father of mercies, through the death and resurrection of his Son has reconciled the world to himself and sent the Holy Spirit among us for the forgiveness of sins; through the ministry of the Church may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, + and of the Holy Spirit.

NOTE: A minor change in the formula, like “I absolve you of your sins” or “I absolve you from all of your sins” don’t effect validity, because they have the essential words “I absolve you” and the minor changes do not change the meaning of the statement.
 
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