Vasectomy reversal question

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movingmom…something that helped my husband see the clarity of Catholic teaching was when he watched the DVD series by Christopher West…Theology of the Body. I would recommend buying it or seeing if your parish has a copy for you to check out. His books are very good too, but I knew my husband would get more out of watching the DVD. I was right!
 
Thanks CKS! My husband is not much of a reader - I have Catholicism for Dummies on his nightstand. Hasn’t moved in months. I think the DVD would be great, he does like TV (I’m making him sound like a real jerk/moron, which he totally isn’t, that’s why I am so sad). Anyway, is the DVD inspiring, condemning, other? I don’t want to scare him away even further. I feel like I am reeling in a fish. Thanks again! You all have inspired me!
 
The DVD isn’t condemning at ALL!! In fact many times throughout the series C. West says “Jesus didn’t come to condemn the world, but to save it”. That is the whole spirit of the DVD. The DVD isn’t about forcing theology down our throats…it is about explaining the true purpose of our sexuality as God intended it. It consists of a two disc set. Four talks total. You must watch them in order since they all build on the first. Surprisingly, NFP and contraception aren’t mentioned until the last talk but by then Christopher West has done such a superb job of laying the ground work in the previous three talks that connecting all the dots where NFP is concerned is a “slam dunk”.

My husband isn’t overly spiritual and doesn’t read the bible. He attends mass regularly with the family and he does pray. He didn’t find the talks “preachy” at all. It only reinforced conclusions I had already come to earlier, but it was a real eye opener for DH.
 
You are awsome CKS! You hit the nail on the head when you said it wasn’t “preachy.” My husband will probibly roll his eyes when we sit to watch it, but I hope he will be pleasantly surprised. I will certainly try anything! Thanks again for helping me!!!
 
movingmom-

My story is a long one- probably similiar to many of us here. My wife and i both were caught up in the ABC mindset. I had a reversion experience in 2001. Birth control was the last straw for me- I would guess it was 2002 or even 2003 before I recognized it as sin and confessed it. Interestinlgy, it was after a brief conversation with my wife about this confession, that prompted her to bring my vasectomy to a priest in her confession. Thankfully, he was a young and very orthodox priest. Whereas my confessor basically told me it was over and to move on, her confessor counseled her about the gravitiy of the action, and different approaches we may want to explore to remedy the situation, in addition to absolving her of the sin. He talked about reversals and told us to check out the website- onemore soul.

For months, I had an ache inmy heart to get the reversal. I would bring it up every couple of months- it was a strain on my marriage. My wife was vehemtently opposed to the idea. She made direct statements that she would never support this idea. I was sad (as you are). I went and talked with her confessor which really helped. He told me not to let this ruin my marriage- that God did not want that , and such a result would be even a greater sin. He told me to back off with my wife, pray for her, and work on being the best husband I could be.

I did back off- no discussion for 9 mos or more. I also started praying the rosary for this intention (LIFE) every week during my holyhour in front of the Blessed Sacrament. This was a great comfort to me!

Well, I consider it my own personal miracle. In the summer of 2004, my wife brought the subject up and says she thinks we should proceed with the reversal. The cost was a big sacrafice for us- but the money all worked out. She never complained about it once.

We have had 2 miscarriages since. These have been heart-breaking. But I trust in God’s will. We now have 2 more children in heaven- and I ask them often to pray for me and our family. This is a great comfort to me as well.

I really do believe the Blessed Mother interceding on our behalf brought this miracle forth. I am so grateful to God for his mercy. And I love my wife more than the day we married.

Be patient, always keep hope. Offer up your sadness as a cross in your life. I will pray for you.

Peace,

Todd
 
When my husband and I married, he had already had a vasectomy. He was married before, 14 years, four children, and the marriage was very bad for many years and he finally had the vasectomy done. By the time we met, went through everything we needed to and married in the church (he wasn’t Catholic and went to RCIA) it had been several years since the vasectomy. I had never been married, and he knew I wanted children, plus that as practicing Catholics we needed to be open to children. He had commited no sin, being he was ignorant of what the Church teaches. But we made a decision to look into a reversal.

I want to tell you the surgery was very long, almost 5 hours. The recoup was very hard…my husband had a lot of pain and swelling. Part in fact that whomever did the original vasectomy didn’t leave much of the tube on one side, and in order to reconnect it the surgeon had to draw it up. And yes, you do have scarring and his did close up. It was over 10 years since his vasectomy when he had the reversal done. Although we did get it done, and we were well aware that it might not be successful, we tried. He did have some sperm count, although low. We tried unsuccssfully to get pregnant for one year. When we had his sperm count retested at that time there were none. We do not regret it at all though. I’ve talked to him at length. He would do it again. The hardest time was trying to get pregnant. It was very stressful and disappointing. But we feel like we offered God our best and we have no regrets.

On a lighter, joking note…we actually got to watch a reversal surgey on TV cable years after…it was unbelieveable! He said if he knew THAT was what they were doing he wouldn’t have done it:eek: ! They had that poor guys insides on the outside…no wonder you have swelling.
 
IMA - Thanks for your wonderful story, I am very inspired that you had a change of heart. I really doubt that he will come around on his own. I have been praying so hard for him to see the “error of his ways.” And then sometimes I feel so guilty for praying so hard for his conversion. Almost like my praying is judgemental. Please God let him change his mind because he is a sinner. I am sinner too. Should I be more praying for acceptance of his sins, rather for him to change? I don’t know, some times I feel as though I should give up. Nana, thanks for your story too. My husband had his vasectomy when we were married. So, I pray for forgiveness of my own actions (of lack thereof) and his lack of action now. Right now I would be happy if he would go to confession. Sigh.
 
I had a vasectomy reversal in 2006—it worked well, is still “flowing” today, and was the most spiritually liberating thing I have done after “coming back” to my home—the Catholic Church. Any of you guys thinking about it, have courage and GO for it.
 
This thread is SIX SIX SIX years old.

We are encouraged not to revive old threads but to create new ones if we have a reason to do so.

Thank you.
 
Katie1723 said:
So the Church’s position is that a man who has a vasectomy MUST have a reversal or he will be in the state of mortal sin?? What about a woman who has had her tubes tied?
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                  ~ Kathy~
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No. It is not the position of the church that a man needs to get a reversal. Feeling sorry for the sin in confession is enough to have the sin absolved.
 
I’m sure plenty have included information about this, but getting a vasectomy reversed these days is a fairly simple procedure. I had mine done about a year ago after converting and decided with my wife that we wanted to have more children. After an exhaustive search we found a Dr. in South Carolina to perform the surgery. We did a consultation on Skype and decided to go ahead with the surgery. I was worried about the pain but was feeling normal just a few days later! Thanks to Dr. Daniel, my wife is now pregnant with our third! If you’re looking for information Dr. Daniel was great. carolinavasectomyreversal.com/
 
mattie_NC said:
I’m sure plenty have included information about this, but getting a vasectomy reversed these days is a fairly simple procedure. I had mine done about a year ago after converting and decided with my wife that we wanted to have more children. After an exhaustive search we found a Dr. in South Carolina to perform the surgery. We did a consultation on Skype and decided to go ahead with the surgery. I was worried about the pain but was feeling normal just a few days later! Thanks to Dr. Daniel, my wife is now pregnant with our third! If you’re looking for information Dr. Daniel was great. carolinavasectomyreversal.com/
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Reported. Mods might want to lock this old thread.
 
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