veil and mantilla use

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WingsOfEagles said:
Okay, so I’ve been coming to the conclusion more and more that I would like to cover my head at Mass. The only thing is, I go to a small town church and literally nobody covers their head at mass, so I was wondering if any women have found a creative way to cover their head that won’t make others in the parish uncomfortable. I feel like it’s a personal thing that I’d like to do, but I don’t want to make others feel that I’m being “holier than though”. I’m a Cradle Catholic, but not from a highly traditional family (They are politically conservative, but not necessarily Conservative Catholics). I feel like my own parents might not approve (I’m in my 20s, but we still go to the same church).
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I agree with Cat’s view that (perhaps counterintuitively) the least pretentious way of covering one’s head in church would be to wear a modest hat. A hat makes it look like you decided to dress up a bit to go to church (normal) rather than decided to “veil” (yikes, so old-fashioned!). But go for something more like this:

(Please Note: This uploaded content is no longer available.)

than this:

http://media.komonews.com/images/110429_hat_beatrice.jpg
 
You will find me often to oppose compulsary head covering for women but If that your way of showing humility and is your call then do it. So what if it draws attentio to you, so what if people think you are acting in a holier than thou manner. Who knows what the future hold and we may as Christians have to stand up and be counted again as the first Christians did. So when you were your veil think of the suffering of the first christian martyrs for doing what they felt they were called too 👍

Im guessing if you still dont want to make it look holier than thou then go colourfull so it looks like a fashion statement if you must 😃
 
WingsOfEagles said:
Okay, so I’ve been coming to the conclusion more and more that I would like to cover my head at Mass. The only thing is, I go to a small town church and literally nobody covers their head at mass, so I was wondering if any women have found a creative way to cover their head that won’t make others in the parish uncomfortable. I.
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If you choose to wear a head covering of any kind at church, nobody cares, unless your choice of hat is so outrageous as to excite comment like a huge pink sombrero. Even if they did make some comments, nothing should prevent you from so doing if your conscience tells you it is the right thing. I have great sympathy for those who are so convicted and I think it is a very quiet, very appropriate, very powerful way to evangelize on the whole topic of reverence in Church and attitude in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. I must confess myself bewildered that anyone with such a conviction would be detered for one moment by considering “what people might say.”
 
I just bought a black scarf. I’m going to wear it like this.

It’s kind of sheer. Does it matter if it’s on the sheer side?
 
Life is funny. As a teen and woman in her thirties, I rebelled against the Pentecostal and Baptist church pressuring me to veil during service. Anytime I went up to sing, some well-meaning woman would press the extra veil she carries in her purse, just in case, into my hand.

Eventually I started attending churches that didn’t veil. Now I feel led to veil, LOL.

I was trying on my scarf and my 16 year old daughter said, “What is happening to you? You look like Mother Theresa?” LOL.

Then she helped me to arrange it in a cute style. 🙂
 
TrueLight said:
I just bought a black scarf. I’m going to wear it like this.

It’s kind of sheer. Does it matter if it’s on the sheer side?
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That looks nice.

I was at confession this afternoon and I thought about this thread. Ahead of me was a Palestinian family waiting to go to confession. The little girls and the mom were wearing veils (scarf-like). I decided to watch, while I stood in line. Everyone just walked right past them and no one seemed to take notice. I did, because they were directly in front of me, otherwise I would have missed it completely. They were very pretty veils too or scarf or whatever the Middle Easterners call them. You folks know what I’m talking about, those veils that Palestinian women wear.

The point is that only in places where people have nothing better to do than to check out what others are doing or wearing are you going to get a reaction. In other places, people don’t really pay much attention to it. So . . . go for it. Wear the head covering.

If someone notices it and makes a negative comment, chalk it up to someone who has nothing better to do than to mind other people’s business. But don’t think uncharitably of them. That would undo the good that you’re trying to accomplish by veiling. In all things be charitable, even in dismissing other people’s nonsense.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
puzzleannie said:
If you choose to wear a head covering of any kind at church, nobody cares, unless your choice of hat is so outrageous as to excite comment like a huge pink sombrero. Even if they did make some comments, nothing should prevent you from so doing if your conscience tells you it is the right thing. I have great sympathy for those who are so convicted and I think it is a very quiet, very appropriate, very powerful way to evangelize on the whole topic of reverence in Church and attitude in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. I must confess myself bewildered that anyone with such a conviction would be detered for one moment by considering “what people might say.”
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I guess it can just be a little hard when you’re discerning something. I feel for me it is the right thing to do, but I also would not want to draw attenion/come off as being snobby (I don’t attend a great big traditional church). I’m a shy person by nature, so anything that’s new to me and might draw attention to me will make me nervous 😊 My parents are also strong personalities, so if they don’t agree with something I do, it’s not easy to go against that. On a positive note, I’m excited to try out some thick headband and headscarves! I think those will fit in just fine with particular church’s atmosphere!
 
Cat said:
I have the feeling that after the wedding (Prince William and Princess Catherine) that hats are going to become very popular in the U.S.!! I even thought about going out and purchasing one!

Many ladies recovering from cancer wear hats or scarves, and look very pretty.
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👍

You may feel self-conscious the first few times, as I and many others did, but after a while you’ll feel naked in church without something on your head. You can do it! I’m simply not a fan of the mantilla…I think they look fine on others but don’t feel right to me, and mantillas were never part of the custom for ladies in the Catholic side of my family. Hats and scarves? CHECK! I look good in them, they feel less conspicuous to me, and I can wear them out after Mass without looking like a goober.

Target, of all places, has a great selection of very fashionable cloche hats that look great over short or long hair. I also do the long scarf thing…place it over your head, then loop under chin and behind your shoulder on each side. Looks GREAT and is very stable and comfortable, no bobby pins required.

You will get compliments and start a trend! When I started covering 4 years ago, I was one of three ladies in my parish of 2500 families. Now we see a new lady in a veil, scarf, or hat every week or so. I counted about 12 ladies in headcovering at one Mass recently. 😃
 
Thanks for the support! I think this forum is the push I needed to feel comfortable. Good to know about Target, there’s one within 30 min. of where I live, so I’ll have to check that out.
 
thirddec said:
You will find me often to oppose compulsory head covering for women but If that your way of showing humility and is your call then do it.
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I totally agree with you. I am adamantly against head covering being compulsory. It is much better done as a freely chosen personal devotion or sacramental.
 
Anybody price hats recently? Those dressy confections you saw at the royal wedding could easily cost four figures! Google something called “bespoke millinery,” but make sure you’re sitting down before you look at the prices!

The UK in “high society” is quite fond of hats; see the ones at Ascot, for example. Hats went out of style during the Kennedy administration in the US, for both men and women. Hence Jackie O’s mantilla.

@ Br. JR–yep, the mantilla was not the accessory I would have chosen with the trench coat and generally winter gear, but I knew Adoration was in progress, and the mantilla was in the car. I guess it beat out a long strip of “bathroom tissue,” which would have been the only other “covering” available (from the lavatory off the narthex in the church!) I can just imagine the looks I would have received if I went into the church with my head TP’ed like a hedge on Halloween!

I suppose those young men hadn’t heard from their moms or grandmothers how women used to bobby-pin Kleenex to their hair to go to a visit to the Blessed Sacrament if they didn’t have anything else! That was quite a “fashion statement” as well!
 
odile53 said:
Anybody price hats recently? Those dressy confections you saw at the royal wedding could easily cost four figures! Google something called “bespoke millinery,” but make sure you’re sitting down before you look at the prices!

The UK in “high society” is quite fond of hats; see the ones at Ascot, for example. Hats went out of style during the Kennedy administration in the US, for both men and women. Hence Jackie O’s mantilla.

@ Br. JR–yep, the mantilla was not the accessory I would have chosen with the trench coat and generally winter gear, but I knew Adoration was in progress, and the mantilla was in the car. I guess it beat out a long strip of “bathroom tissue,” which would have been the only other “covering” available (from the lavatory off the narthex in the church!) I can just imagine the looks I would have received if I went into the church with my head TP’ed like a hedge on Halloween!

I suppose those young men hadn’t heard from their moms or grandmothers how women used to bobby-pin Kleenex to their hair to go to a visit to the Blessed Sacrament if they didn’t have anything else! That was quite a “fashion statement” as well!
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Straw cloche hat purchased at Target yesterday, very conservative and NOT fussy, $12.99 US dollars. Scarves at the Goodwill down the street, $1.00 US dollars. I don’t find spending outrageous amounts of money fashionable. 😉
 
So I wore my scarf to a TLM. That parish is VERY traditional. Most of the women wore mantillas. I didn’t see any hats or scarves. I felt right at home.

So I met two women there and we were discussing veiling and I told one that I’m going to buy scarves and hats. She said with a little frown, “No. Wear mantillas. Something about the lace.”

Ha ha!
 
the tradition of veiling seems to be forgotten by catholics these days (in most cases) in medieval times, most women whore a veil not only in church BUT at all times. and were required to in the churches
 
Traditional1101 said:
the tradition of veiling seems to be forgotten by catholics these days (in most cases) in medieval times, most women whore a veil not only in church BUT at all times. and were required to in the churches
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daily covering of the head went out in the 11th C. for most of Europe, especially maidens. Head coverings were as varied nation to nation, as they were types.

Also, the picture of the pink “hat” should be removed. It is not a hat, it’s an obscene fashion statement of the coture industry. digitallife.today.com/_news/2011/04/29/6556070-facebook-cthulhu-hat-a-bold-choice-for-royal-wedding- Shame on that “princess” for using horrible fashion to make a blasphemous statement during a christian wedding ceremony.
Posting pictures that are copyrighted is illegal, anyway. Next time, a link to the original picture website would be more appropriate. Not cool to see on this thread.
 
TrueLight said:
So I wore my scarf to a TLM. That parish is VERY traditional. Most of the women wore mantillas. I didn’t see any hats or scarves. I felt right at home.

So I met two women there and we were discussing veiling and I told one that I’m going to buy scarves and hats. She said with a little frown, “No. Wear mantillas. Something about the lace.”

Ha ha!
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Pushaw! That’s just her taste. Mantillas were never worn in some cultures, as they originated in Spain. A small veil, a round doily, a hat, or a scarf are all fine options. The point is to cover one’s head, not to fit in with the popular girls at the parish, LOL! 😛

I have lots of photos of my Dad’s German/French family back in the days before headcovering went out of style. Not a mantilla to be found anywhere. Mantillas can be beautiful, but they’re more popular as a revival thing now than they ever were in many parts of the country before Vatican II.
 
odile53 said:
Anybody price hats recently? Those dressy confections you saw at the royal wedding could easily cost four figures! Google something called “bespoke millinery,” but make sure you’re sitting down before you look at the prices!

The UK in “high society” is quite fond of hats; see the ones at Ascot, for example. Hats went out of style during the Kennedy administration in the US, for both men and women. Hence Jackie O’s mantilla.

@ Br. JR–yep, the mantilla was not the accessory I would have chosen with the trench coat and generally winter gear, but I knew Adoration was in progress, and the mantilla was in the car. I guess it beat out a long strip of “bathroom tissue,” which would have been the only other “covering” available (from the lavatory off the narthex in the church!) I can just imagine the looks I would have received if I went into the church with my head TP’ed like a hedge on Halloween!
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:rotfl: Too funny
I suppose those young men hadn’t heard from their moms or grandmothers how women used to bobby-pin Kleenex to their hair to go to a visit to the Blessed Sacrament if they didn’t have anything else! That was quite a “fashion statement” as well!
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You’re probably right. I was Jewish until age 20. However, I was educated in Catholic schools from grades 1 through my doctorate. I remember seeing the Kleenex.

Whatever you choose to wear, promise me that you won’t wear a hat with antlers. :eek:

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
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