Of all human experiences, suffering is perhaps the most difficult to come to grips with. Every person who has ever lived has suffered, yet our Catholic faith teaches the absolute and eternal value of suffering.
One caution here is not to focus on the sins of other members of the Church! It does not matter if it is the one next to you, or the Pope! They answer for their individual sins and the Church does not teach sin! All of the media attention to this current problem, as horrible as it is, risks destroying the faith of many believers. It is a red herring, and seeks to distract us from our relationship with God.
Rather, we need to focus solely on our relationship with God, and doing what is pleasing to Him - even if it involves suffering. Especially if it involves suffering. For, it is in suffering that we are most closely bonded to Christ the suffering Servant. Being parts of His Mystical Body, we can offer our suffering to the Father for our own benefit, or even better, for the benefit of others - whether living or in purgatory. Think of your departed parents or grandparents for example.
Now, as to being a victim soul, that is a very precise, specialized and limited status. Some are indeed called to this as they have been equipped for the role. In my case, it was very suddenly revealed to me in prayer before the Blessed Sacrament. I inexplicably asked to bear the suffering of a fellow parishioner and it was granted to me. However, it is best to seek spiritual direction as the suffering may be great.
As to suffering in general, two books come to mind:
Making Sense out of Suffering by Prof. Peter Kreeft and
Arise from Darkness by Fr. Benedict Groeschel(†). Both are great aids in understanding and dealing with suffering.
As radical as it sounds, we are called to accept, even
enjoy suffering for our love oi God. The great mystics such as Saint Teresa of Avila and Saint John of the Cross have taught us this. More recently, we have the example of
Saint André Bessette:
Many came to him with their illnesses and problems. As more and more people learned about him he would spend eight to ten hours a day with those who needed spiritual healing and support. He became so well known that secretaries had to be assigned to answer the 80,000 letters he received annually. When people came to ask him for a cure, he would tell them to first thank God for their suffering because it was so valuable.
But it was something that the person consciously agreed to do. It was something they could either accept or reject.
It sounds a bit like something unpleasant has got a residual claim on you, and you need to give someone better a better claim on you. Continue working hard to rescue others from addiction; that’s always a good start. Helping others without expecting them to be able to reciprocate in any meaningful way is also a good start.
