Wanting Religious Life for the wrong reasons?

[seremina]

You are encouraging, seremina, and thank you for the sweetness. I realize that the ideal is the beauty within. And, we all strive to make the world a better place, in spite of our short comings. But, self love is another one of my life’s tough nuts to crack. Tis better to function and try to transcend one’s corporal being… forget about the body and focus on Him, I say:thumbsup:

You’re very welcome, Sr. Iris. (I hope I got that right. I’m such a blunderbuss with names!)

 

[seremina]

Whoah! Secular Orders are not for people who cannot enter a religious order. Secular Orders are part of religious families. They are a calling of their own. The Church recognizes them as a separate calling from the conventual life. But they are called to live the evangelical councils, the Gospel and the rule of their founder. They have a ministry in the Church, their own spirituality, their own canonical superiors, fraternities and some even live in common community houses. Some members are celibate. Some are deacons, priests, bishops and even popes. John XXIII was a Secular Franciscan. I believe that John Paul II was a Carmelite. St. Pius X was also a Secular Franciscan.

Every secular order falls under the authority of the Sacred Congregation for Institutes of Consecrated Life and Societies of Apostolic Life. They are considered Institutes of Consecrated Life and public associations of the faithful. Their profession is a liturgical action that is binding until death under the pain of serious sin if they violate it. The larger Secular Orders: Franciscans, Dominicans, Carmelites and Oblates, each have a superior general in Rome who answers to the Holy Father like any other order. Many of these orders have given birth to hundreds of congregations.

My own congreation was founded by four Secular Franciscans who wanted to live the conventual life following the rule of St. Francis for the Brothers and Sisters of Penance. The TOR friars who run Franciscan University are part of the Third Order. Hence their initials after their name. But they are real friars. The Friars on EWTN are part of the Third Order of St. Francis. But they are real friars. Some third order members are friars, sisters, diocesan clerics or married men and women. But they all follow the same rule of life and form one family. This is true of the Dominicans, Carmelites and Benedictines.

Be careful. To be a member of a Third Order you must have a calling to that life.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

PS. Our OSF stands for Brothers of Life of the Order of St. Francis. We are friars, but we were founded by Secular Franciscans and Capuchin Friars who joined to start a new order.

With all respect, Brother, I said “I almost feel like”. Its true I used to think that’s what their secondary purpose was, but I have been getting gentle explanations why they don’t have that purpose. Still, I guess the Brothers and Sisters of Penance of St. Francis are being overly kind. They accepted me because I couldn’t get into Religious Life no matter what I did. I certainly hope they’re not wrong to do so, and their kindness has healed me greatly.

You said that Lay/3rd Orders require a calling in order to enter them, am I right? If so… then am I wrong to be in any order at all? I mean, geez… it seems I only belong to the nonexistent order of Misfits. Heh.

 

[JReducation]

With all respect, Brother, I said “I almost feel like”. Its true I used to think that’s what their secondary purpose was, but I have been getting gentle explanations why they don’t have that purpose. Still, I guess the Brothers and Sisters of Penance of St. Francis are being overly kind. They accepted me because I couldn’t get into Religious Life no matter what I did. I certainly hope they’re not wrong to do so, and their kindness has healed me greatly.

You said that Lay/3rd Orders require a calling in order to enter them, am I right? If so… then am I wrong to be in any order at all? I mean, geez… it seems I only belong to the nonexistent order of Misfits. Heh.

No. If you are accepted to make profession, then you will know that you were called by God to share the joys and sufferings of our Franciscan family as one of us. So stay the course and pray to the Immaculate Conception, patroness of the Franciscan Order and to our holy Father St. Francis for the grace of perseverence until death. If it is our Lord’s wish that you serve him as a Franciscan among the Brothers and Sisters of Penance, they will not deny you their spiritual help. I too will pray for you, especially tonight and tomorrow on the solemnity of our holy Father Francis. Please pray for me.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[CatholicFireman]

DL82

Forgive me if this was asked already but I haven’t read all the posts. Have you thought of another order? Maybe one more involved with people? Many people visit a lot of orders until they find one that fits. Good luck and God Bless.

 

[JReducation]

DL82

Forgive me if this was asked already but I haven’t read all the posts. Have you thought of another order? Maybe one more involved with people? Many people visit a lot of orders until they find one that fits. Good luck and God Bless.

I thought he was a Salesian or am I wrong? Salesians are a Congregation of Apostolic Life. They are much more involved in the secular world than monks and friars.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[CatholicFireman]

I don’t know. I’m nodding off at the computer tonight so I’m being lazy and not reading all the posts.

If that’s true then I don’t have any suggestions except the original one that maybe he needs an order that fits.

To Jesus through Mary,

CF

 

[seremina]

No. If you are accepted to make profession, then you will know that you were called by God to share the joys and sufferings of our Franciscan family as one of us. So stay the course and pray to the Immaculate Conception, patroness of the Franciscan Order and to our holy Father St. Francis for the grace of perseverence until death. If it is our Lord’s wish that you serve him as a Franciscan among the Brothers and Sisters of Penance, they will not deny you their spiritual help. I too will pray for you, especially tonight and tomorrow on the solemnity of our holy Father Francis. Please pray for me.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

Brother, I am happy to pray for you. Thank you for praying for me. I love St. Francis and the Franciscan way. I will pray to Mary and St. Francis.

I don’t know if this is unique or not, but I lean a lot more towards the Franciscan Rosary than the typical Rosary. Its brought me something I never understood nor knew: Joy. Before that, I had no idea what happiness was nor what it meant. Dictionaries were useless in explaining that. Though the concept of Poverty and Austerity is a little scary for me, I admit I feel drawn to it.

Love in Christ,
Sr. Mina, BSP.
(though they’re a lay order, they still call each other Brother and Sister as a courtesy; I thought I’d give you this note if you didn’t know. Its awesome having a Franciscan Brother (you) to communicate with.)

 

[JReducation]

Brother, I am happy to pray for you. Thank you for praying for me. I love St. Francis and the Franciscan way. I will pray to Mary and St. Francis.

I don’t know if this is unique or not, but I lean a lot more towards the Franciscan Rosary than the typical Rosary. Its brought me something I never understood nor knew: Joy. Before that, I had no idea what happiness was nor what it meant. Dictionaries were useless in explaining that. Though the concept of Poverty and Austerity is a little scary for me, I admit I feel drawn to it.

Love in Christ,
Sr. Mina, BSP.
(though they’re a lay order, they still call each other Brother and Sister as a courtesy; I thought I’d give you this note if you didn’t know. Its awesome having a Franciscan Brother (you) to communicate with.)

Did you know that the Secular Franciscans are not really a lay order? They are a secular order, but not lay. The brothers and sisters can be lay, deacons, priests, bishops and even popes. As long as the clergy are not religious, they are allowed to join the order. Yes, they are called Brother and Sister. It is their canonical title.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[Miserys_Fence]

I first felt a calling to become a nun several years after my husband passed. I pushed these thoughts aside, as I was not (and still am not, yet) Catholic.

Although I loved my husband, he was not my ‘soulmate,’ the person that God had chosen for me. I finally did meet my soulmate, and when we had serious difficulties in our relationship, thoughts of becoming a nun would come creeping back. When we became engaged, I dropped the idea permanently.

However, my beloved fiance passed away recently, and I am now back in RCIA and still feel the calling. I know that my fiance was my one true soulmate, and I will never love anyone like that again, or be loved like that again, so I feel that this loving energy should be put to use for God. Most people don’t understand–they think this is just a knee-jerk reaction to the grief, even when I explain that I’ve had this calling before.

This isn’t grief; this is love.

I will pray that you find whatever it is you need.

Miz

 

[irisfromohio]

I first felt a calling to become a nun several years after my husband passed. I pushed these thoughts aside, as I was not (and still am not, yet) Catholic.

Although I loved my husband, he was not my ‘soulmate,’ the person that God had chosen for me. I finally did meet my soulmate, and when we had serious difficulties in our relationship, thoughts of becoming a nun would come creeping back. When we became engaged, I dropped the idea permanently.

However, my beloved fiance passed away recently, and I am now back in RCIA and still feel the calling. I know that my fiance was my one true soulmate, and I will never love anyone like that again, or be loved like that again, so I feel that this loving energy should be put to use for God. Most people don’t understand–they think this is just a knee-jerk reaction to the grief, even when I explain that I’ve had this calling before.

This isn’t grief; this is love.

I will pray that you find whatever it is you need.

Miz

I am not widowed, nor have I found my human “soul-mate”. In fact, I don’t know if I even believe in that whole concept, but I do know that if it exists, Jesus is MY soul-mate. I identify with your feelings, however. I am a convert of over 25 years… congratulations on coming home! Most communities want you to wait for 2 years before you begin a postulancy, but that time will go by so fast! Glad you are with us & turn that “trial membership” into a “membership”!

 

[Miserys_Fence]

Thank you, Iris! As I stated before, I’m not even Catholic yet, and have about 5 or 6 more years before I’m ‘free’ to act upon my calling anyway (until they are educated and self-supporting, my children are my vocation). I have found an ecumenical convent that will accept non-Catholic women as Sisters, and I didn’t see that they had an age limit for postulants, as most of the Catholic communities I’ve researched do.

I hope to take spiritual retreats to different convents over the next few years. I was planning on one this fall, but have used most of my vacation days this year due to my fiance’s sudden passing.

Miz