Wedding music

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I spoke w/ the church organist today about playing for our dd’s August wedding.

She’s sending a packet of info, but some of the songs she mentioned sound a bit like 70’s love music. I could be proven wrong when I receive the packet.

What songs do you like for weddings? For the procession? The recessional? Background music while guests are being seated?
 
I spoke w/ the church organist today about playing for our dd’s August wedding.

She’s sending a packet of info, but some of the songs she mentioned sound a bit like 70’s love music. I could be proven wrong when I receive the packet.

What songs do you like for weddings? For the procession? The recessional? Background music while guests are being seated?
Oooh 🙂 I’m in the middle of going through this myself. The info my organist sent me also had a bunch of secular music, including the secular bridal marches that aren’t actually supposed to be used. It also had songs from musicals for the prelude. A wedding is a Mass, so I think sacred music is the way to go. It’s not about personalizing it or making it unique - it’s about God and the Sacrament. I’m not trying to denigrate being creative and everybody having the exact same wedding - but there are a lot of options within sacred music, and also that kind of stuff can all be done and emphasized at the reception.

This is what we’ve decided. And yes, it’s from the Gather Hymnal but we still feel they are reverent. A lot of the songs have a special spiritual significance for us, and it’s what we were raised with.

Preludes (instrumental) - Make Me a Channel of Your Peace, and Where Charity and Love Prevail. We’re thinking about including the text of the prayers in the program and encouraging people to meditate on them.

Processional: Canon in D (that’s my one non-sacred peice)

Opening Hymn: Sing to the Mountains (a little fluffy perhaps, but I think it’s good for the opening - I personally find it very joyous)

Offertory: The Servant Song

Communion: Return to God, and then Adoramus Te Christe for meditation as the last of the guests recieve and the vessels are purified.

Recessional: Haily Holy Queen Enthroned Above (Salve Regina).

We’re also going to have Ave Maria during a presentation of gifts/request for intercession to the Holy Family
 
A lot of it depends on if you have relatives and friends who are participants, or spectators. Spectators need music that doesn’t necessarily involve their voices.

My opinion: The closer to traditional you can get, the better.

What does DD and the boy-who-stole-her want?😉
 
I read this post as we were emailing to our priest the music for our dd’s wedding in June, selected with the help of the marvelous soloist and the Cathedral’s music director/organist. It is all either sacred or classical:

Prelude: Air on a G String (that title always unsettles me) Bach; Calm is the Night, Gift of Love, other pieces

Seating of Mothers: Ave Maria - Schubert

Procession of Bridesmaids: Trumpet Tune - Purcell

Bride’s entrance: Trumpet Tune - Johnson

Responsorial Psalm: Psalm 128 - Haugen

Gospel Acclamation: Blest Are Those

Offertory: Seek Ye First - Lafferty

Communion: Holy, Holy, Holy - Dykes

Meditation: Surely the Presence - Wolfe

Recessional: Trumpet Voluntary - Stanley

Postlude: Prelude to the Te Deum - Charpentier

We will have a soloist, organist, trumpeter and violinist.

It will be the Mass of Creation by Haugen, and the Mass parts will be sung, Both the soloist and Father have magnificent voices, so we are blessed. Our daughter likes things that you don’t always hear, so the musicians are delighted to get to do something other than the “usual.”

God bless, and have fun picking out music. If you do Google searches, you can listen to clips of many, many pieces.
 
I spoke w/ the church organist today about playing for our dd’s August wedding.

She’s sending a packet of info, but some of the songs she mentioned sound a bit like 70’s love music. I could be proven wrong when I receive the packet.

What songs do you like for weddings? For the procession? The recessional? Background music while guests are being seated?
Procession/recession/prelude was all classical music. Canon In D (Pachelbel), Trumpet Voluntary (Clarke), Wedding March (Mendelssohn).

During Mass we sung Amazing Grace at the Offeratory and How Great Thou Art at Communion. During presentation of flowers to Mary our solist/cantor sun On This Day O Beautiful Mother.
 
I’ve posted a few thoughts on your other thread in the Family Life forum.
 
As an organist at many weddings, my policy is that there are no secular songs or recordings. Those can be played at the reception. I strongly discourage use of the opera-spawned Wagner and Mendelssohn processionals, but I’m not at all opposed to other Prince of Denmark-type trumpet voluntaries or the ubiquitous Final from Widor’s 5th Organ Symphony. I’ll play Pachelbel, but I can’t stand it. Everybody wants that monotonous tune for some reason (although they never ask for Ravel’s Bolero!). As for Mass hymns, anything that is appropriate to the readings or the nature of the liturgy will work, except those certain songs that I do not play at Sunday Mass for their lack of orthodoxy or general unsingability.
 
I’ll play Pachelbel, but I can’t stand it. Everybody wants that monotonous tune for some reason (although they never ask for Ravel’s Bolero!).
It’s far from monotonous when Trevor Pinnock and the English Concert play it on period instruments in the original instrumentation and in historically-informed style and with the accompanying gigue. Unfortunately most people have only heard the less-than-half-tempo Berlin Phil-type arrangements with the totally gratuitous viola pizz part and that’s what they want the organ to sound like. In some places it is now almost the cliche that the Wagner/Mendelssohn combination has become. I don’t look forward to requests for it either.
 
It’s far from monotonous when Trevor Pinnock and the English Concert play it on period instruments in the original instrumentation and in historically-informed style and with the accompanying gigue…
Agree with you, Guitar. 🙂

Also, when musicians treat a piece that they’ve played millions of times like it’s the first time they played it with the same zeal as when they first heard it or learned it, that beauty definitely comes out. Yes, we get asked all the time to play almost the same pieces for each wedding, and, yes, it would be preferable if they chose other pieces that we either suggested, etc. but why give them a half-hearted ‘performance’?

Some pieces become monotonous to us because we hear them all the time, where as these people don’t. Even when I don’t like a piece of music that I’m hired to sing (whether it is a good or bad composition), I do my best to find what good or smidgeon of good there might be in the music. I can’t say this of all of my colleagues with whom I work and with whom I am friends, but some, including myself, will do our darndest to make a piece beautiful or less cheesy or fresh and inspiring no matter how many times we’ve played it or how much we dislike it. That’s one of the challenges of being a musician and the beauty of being an artistic musician. 😉

Anyway… getting back to wedding music. Sacred is always the best, but “absolute” music can be permitted, such as the Pachelbel “Canon in D”. It has no sacred nor secular connotation. It is considered just pure music. The Wagner “Bridal Chorus” and Mendelssohn “Wedding March” should not be played because they are from an opera and a ballet respectively, so they would not be considered just pure, absolute music.

This is what we had for our mass. Music liturgy is very important to my husband and I as it helps us with our prayer and because we were both members of the choir where we got married. We had a choir, soloist and organist, so most of everything was with choir.

Bridesmaids - 18th Variation from “Goldberg Variations” (on organ, and played at more of an Andante tempo - worked very beautifully) - J.S. Bach

Bride - O God Beyond All Praising (Just on organ)

Kyrie & Gloria - Missa “Aeterna Christi Munera” - Palestrina

Psalm 145 - Gelineau psalmody

Gospel Acclamation - Alleluia from “O Filii et Filiae”

Prayer of Intercession - Chanted

Offertory - A New Commandment - Thomas Tallis

Acclamations - We had them chanted in Latin, including the Our Father. Amen had a choral expansion by Thomas Luis de Victoria.

Agnus Dei - Missa “Aeterna Christi Munera” - Palestrina

Communion - Ave Verum Corpus - Gabriel Faure
Laudate Dominum from “Vesperae Solemnes de confessore in C” - Mozart

Presentation to the Blessed Mother - Ave Maria - Gabriel Faure

Recessional - Organ Fugue in D-Major - J.S. Bach

One of my favorite motets is “Sicut Cervus” by Palestrina, so we had that as one of the preludes.
 
Recessional: Trumpet Voluntary - Stanley
This one still makes me cry when I hear it. This was the recessional at my wedding. I think it is the one piece that reminds me specifically of my wedding. Well, that and cannon in D. That is good too, but Trumpet Voluntery is the one that makes me cry.
 
Thanks for the suggestions. I’ll print them out and put them in the wedding planner binder.
 
KCT–

Also, over on Lizanne’s bridal board there is a frequent contributor-- Alyssa-- who is a professional church musician. She always has TONS of great advice on music for weddings.
 
Wow, Sarabande, your wedding sounds beautiful!

I would LOVE to have those kind of pieces - the Palestrina and chant and stuff - but we only have an organist and a soloist/cantor, so I don’t think it would sound nearly as good.

But, I’m pretty happy with what we’ve got…I’m really looking forward to it 🙂

I knwo Canon is overdone; I have an organist friend who hates it. But it’s not overdone for ME…I don’t listen to it all the time. 🙂
 
Wow, Sarabande, your wedding sounds beautiful!

I would LOVE to have those kind of pieces - the Palestrina and chant and stuff - but we only have an organist and a soloist/cantor, so I don’t think it would sound nearly as good.

But, I’m pretty happy with what we’ve got…I’m really looking forward to it 🙂
Thanks, Asillia! 🙂 We were very fortunate to have the choir for our nuptial mass. The thing, though, is that even if you do not have access to a choir, there is such a vast collection of gorgeous sacred music from so many centuries which can be used by your organist and soloist. I’m sure the music for your nuptial mass will be spiritually beautiful. 😃

I agree about the congregational chants not sounding as good with only one person singing. We did it because we knew that we’d have a 30+ choir, some of our guests, ourselves and the priest would be chanting along. But I never like the Sanctus, Mortem tuam, etc. sung into a microphone by one lone person. When we do it for the Sunday Latin NO masses, the cantor always steps away from the mic and the choir and congregation will sing without having another voice over them. That’s how we wanted it for our nuptial mass as well. Otherwise, had we not been fortunate to have the choir there, we would not have done it.
I knwo Canon is overdone; I have an organist friend who hates it. But it’s not overdone for ME…I don’t listen to it all the time. 🙂
Yours is a perfect example of why I believe what I do. The more I work as a musician and dig deeper into my beliefs, the more solidified this becomes for me. I was just talking about this today after a funeral my organist friend and I were hired to play and cantor. He was agreeing with me in regards to what I wrote in my previous post. It’s our duty as musicians, especially when playing sacred music, to approach each piece as if it’s new and not play it robotically. We have to say a prayer through it. When there are words to the piece, we need to focus on what those words mean – whether in English, Latin or any other language. No matter how overplayed a piece is, if we do all that AND do it with love and prayer, that will come across to the congregant. When I hear it, as a person who does hear and perform these works over and over and over again, it does uplift when that musician is really doing it from the heart and not like a robot. When we approach it with a bad attitude – sure the notes might all be there, but there isn’t any love or inspiration in it. Of course other people would think a piece is boring if it’s played like that.
 
I knwo Canon is overdone; I have an organist friend who hates it. But it’s not overdone for ME…I don’t listen to it all the time. 🙂
Asillia, this is something I try to remember too, as does Sarabande and I’m sure she and I have had similar conversations on these boards before.

So please don’t mind my comments. 🙂 I may have already played for 150 weddings a year, but that is not today’s bride’s problem, it’s part of the business I’m in and it’s up to me to get over it and play like I mean it.

I’m not saying the repetition shouldn’t get to you - it does and that’s normal - but when you can’t manage it gracefully, you get out. You don’t keep taking the money whilst insulting your customers, belittling their choices because they are popular or turning in unprofessional performances because you are bored to tears.
 
Asillia, this is something I try to remember too, as does Sarabande and I’m sure she and I have had similar conversations on these boards before.

So please don’t mind my comments. 🙂 I may have already played for 150 weddings a year, but that is not today’s bride’s problem, it’s part of the business I’m in and it’s up to me to get over it and play like I mean it.

I’m not saying the repetition shouldn’t get to you - it does and that’s normal - but when you can’t manage it gracefully, you get out. You don’t keep taking the money whilst insulting your customers, belittling their choices because they are popular or turning in unprofessional performances because you are bored to tears.
👍 Guitar, couldn’t say it better myself. 😃
 
I’m glad I asked. Some of the music you all mentioned was on the organist’s list 👍 .

So was “I Can’t Smile Without You” by Barry Manilow, “Part of Your World” from The Little Mermaid, “Three Times a Lady” by Lionel Ritchie and others :eek: .
 
My best friend who plays violin and I play a lot of weddings together. For awhile, when I didn’t have anything better to suggest, it was CANON at EVERY SINGLE WEDDING. I think I’ve played it 300 times, at least.

We made up words to it. BEER, BEER, BEER, BEER (down the scale).

It’s hard to play it seriously. Of course, when requested, we do it fine and prayerfully. It’s just …ugh.

I’m going to get flamed for this, but I suggest this to our brides:

For the procession, ideally is one song, not 3 choppy pieces for family, bridesmaids, and bride.

So, I suggest How Beautiful. There are 3 sections, with a key change and momentum built in for the bride. It is beautiful whether sung or instrumental. It helps in creating momentum in the procession. I did it at a Catholic wedding once, and a girl called me the next day (who was at that wedding) asking me to do it for her procession at her wedding 2 weeks later. (she scrapped what she orginally had planned).

ANother option is to process to an entrance song/hymn, with people singing. I’ve done that a couple of times and that is really beautiful too.
 
Another option is to process to an entrance song/hymn, with people singing. I’ve done that a couple of times and that is really beautiful too.
Interesting, especially since she’s not doing the typical ‘dad gives away the bride’. It will be one procession w/ servers, attendants, parents of the groom, parents of the bride, bride and groom together, and lastly the deacon and priest.
 
Interesting, especially since she’s not doing the typical ‘dad gives away the bride’. It will be one procession w/ servers, attendants, parents of the groom, parents of the bride, bride and groom together, and lastly the deacon and priest.
The last part is exactly the way it used to be done at the Cathedral. The rector was always the last one to process.

As far as music is concerned, the former rector (who was also the first one the Cathedral had) was very emphatic about not allowing secular music for the Nuptial Mass. He would tell the couples that they needed to make sure that if they had visiting musicians, these folks had to know how to play/sing sacred Music.

One time a couple (or some well-meaning relative of the couple’s) contracted a high school Mariachi group to play for their wedding. As the rector was incensing the gifts, the Mariachi group began to play “Spanish Eyes”. :eek: The rector sent the wedding coordinator up to the chor loft to tell the Mariachis to stop. He wound up chanting the Ave Maria as he was concluding the incensing.

If you want Barry Manilow, Lionel Ritchie or the Carpenters, save it for the reception. The Nuptial liturgy needs (and requires) sacred music.

That being said, the standard in this diocese is:

Wedding March (or Canon D, or Prince of Denmark)
Singing of the Responsorial Psalm
Gospel Acclamation
Ave Maria or Ave Verum (offertory)
If the priest is incensing, he will chant something or have the organ play something
Sanctus, Memorial Acclamation and Great Amen
Agnus Dei
Panis Angelicus
If the Ave Maria was not sung at the offertory, then it is sung as the bride presents her bouquet to a statue of the Blessed Mother
Wedding March

It gets pretty tiring if you have to hear the same stuff 88+ times a year. 🤷
 
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