What are your thoughts on women dressing modestly?

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DeSales111 said:
Beautiful doesn’t have to be overly frumpy, but every woman should be mindful of what they are trying to convey and who to. Making curves more noticible or showing more flesh, why? What is the reason? Just be reasonable, mindful of others, and most of all prayerfully ask God and our Blessed Mother to guide your consciences.
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I think the flip side of this is that men ought not to assume that a woman’s attire is necessarily for them to look at. For example - I had to train myself to buy business clothing that skims my figure rather than being loose. Not because I want to show off, but because I want to look like I’ve graduated high school. Makeup usually has the same purpose. It does, I’ve noticed, also attract more attention from men, but that’s not the purpose.
 
DarkLight said:
For example - I had to train myself to buy business clothing that skims my figure rather than being loose. Not because I want to show off, but because I want to look like I’ve graduated high school.
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Right. I can only de-sexify myself so much before I start to look like a schlub.
 
DarkLight said:
For example - I had to train myself to buy business clothing that skims my figure rather than being loose. Not because I want to show off, but because I want to look like I’ve graduated high school. Makeup usually has the same purpose. It does, I’ve noticed, also attract more attention from men, but that’s not the purpose.
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I don’t really like makeup that much, but I do wear a little bit in order to make myself look older. I am 26 and have one of those faces that looks like a high school student (so I’ve been told). I work a lot with Catholic schools and I often have to go visit them. At this point, I want people to take me seriously and think I’m an adult, not one of the students at the school I’m visiting.
 
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I wish I had to wear makeup to make me look older. How nice that would be. 🙂
 
What do you have against schlubs? And for that matter, what are they?
 
I remember a young group of women, Seventh Day Adventists, who were wanting to buy some furniture from us to decorate their new accessories boutique they were opening. All of them dressed modestly, but they did it with incredible flair, wore make-up, were very fashionable and beautiful. And they werent necessarily dressed expensively. There are a lot of cute and trendy items that are modest. I’ve noticed that a man who is looking for a long-term relationship seems to be more attracted to a woman who is trendy, polished, and confident more than someone who may be revealing cleavage and leg. Especially when it’s done in a cheap manner, without attention to style or beauty.

I guess I’m not really saying anything new, here. Same old thing everyone’s mamma tells them lol.
 
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Yes, for me, cleavage and leg would be a distraction. It would make me nervous. haha
 
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starlady said:
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DarkLight:
For example - I had to train myself to buy business clothing that skims my figure rather than being loose. Not because I want to show off, but because I want to look like I’ve graduated high school. Makeup usually has the same purpose. It does, I’ve noticed, also attract more attention from men, but that’s not the purpose.
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I don’t really like makeup that much, but I do wear a little bit in order to make myself look older. I am 26 and have one of those faces that looks like a high school student (so I’ve been told). I work a lot with Catholic schools and I often have to go visit them. At this point, I want people to take me seriously and think I’m an adult, not one of the students at the school I’m visiting.
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I remember reading somewhere that a woman wearing makeup can actually benefit her career by making her appear more polished and professional.

It is what it is. I make no judgement here. :shrugs:
 
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JamalChristophr said:
What do you have against schlubs? And for that matter, what are they?
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Urban Dictionary - Schlub: Unkempt in appearance, either due to lack of effort or lack of awareness. The opposite of metrosexual.

I have nothing against schlubs. I just don’t want to look like one.
 
starlady said:
I don’t really like makeup that much, but I do wear a little bit in order to make myself look older. I am 26 and have one of those faces that looks like a high school student (so I’ve been told). I work a lot with Catholic schools and I often have to go visit them. At this point, I want people to take me seriously and think I’m an adult, not one of the students at the school I’m visiting.
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Same here. I’ve been asked if my school was out for the summer, a decade after I graduated.
 
I sure agree a woman’s attire is not necessarily for men to look at, however men will take notice no matter the woman’s intentions. I would hope you would achieve the same results on your job no matter what you wear, as you should be hired for your talents and not your looks. I do know in the real world though that that may not always be the case.
 
It really depends on the job. I focused on it a bit more when I was in a teaching job at a university or working with children. It also tends to be more important the more often you interact with people who don’t specifically know you. You can get away with a lot more if you’re in a position where you work largely with the same people every day. But I think a lot of guys don’t realize that it’s essentially the female equivalent of putting on a suit and tie. There’s jobs (and other occasions) where dressing a certain way, including makeup, is just what’s expected.

Part of the problem is there’s no “neutral” way for women to dress in the way there is for men. There just is no outfit that I can put on that will read as, I’m trying to dress nicely and professionally, and has no connotation regarding attractiveness whatsoever. There’s kind of a default assumption a lot of people make that women’s clothing - no matter what they wear - has something to do with how they want to look to men, in a way that just isn’t the case for men. Men are assumed to dress for themselves and the occasion; women are assumed (not universally, but not uncommonly) to dress for men.
 
DeSales111 said:
I would hope you would achieve the same results on your job no matter what you wear, as you should be hired for your talents and not your looks
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How you dress conveys your attitude and personality. If I show up to a white-collar job interview in a tank top and basketball shorts, they’re probably not gonna say, “Wow, what a professional young woman.”
 
TheAmazingGrace said:
How you dress conveys your attitude and personality. If I show up to a white-collar job interview in a tank top and basketball shorts, they’re probably not gonna say, “Wow, what a professional young woman.”
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Yup. And sometimes things that aren’t quite fair affect it too. It’s a common complaint of those of us who look much younger, that people assume us to be less experienced or competent - we just don’t look old enough to know what we’re doing, so we get overlooked more.
 
The other part of it is a small group of people called ‘the fashion industry.’ On the other hand, I was in the supermarket last summer and a young lady showed up in house slippers, sweat pants and a mismatched top. Her hair indicated she had fallen asleep on the couch, then woke up and realized she had to get a few things, and ‘oh well.’ Unusual.
 
edwest211 said:
Her hair indicated she had fallen asleep on the couch, then woke up and realized she had to get a few things, and ‘oh well.’ Unusual.
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And? If I have midnight sugar cravings, I’m not gonna get out of my PJs and get dressed up before I walk over to the convenience store. Nobody cares what you wear when you’re grocery shopping.
 
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Sad. There are people who do care about ‘looking presentable.’ Nothing formal, just presentable. As Al Kresta said on Catholic radio: ‘Standards of dress have gone down.’
 
edwest211 said:
Sad. There are people who do care about ‘looking presentable.’ Nothing formal, just presentable. As Al Kresta said on Catholic radio: ‘Standards of dress have gone down.’
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Who am I trying to impress at the grocery store? The cashiers don’t care. The other shoppers don’t care.
 
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