G
guanophore
Guest
Yes, I agree that blame communicates non-acceptance,and perhaps it does coerce people into compliance, but it is a poor motivation for change. Taking responsibility is a much more fruitful method of motivating change.Blame communicates a non-acceptance, which motivates a person to behave. It is a very, very natural part of human behavior.
Without question blame is endemic to our fallen nature. We see this immediately in the Garden, when Adam blamed Eve, then Eve blamed the serpent. No one was taking responsibility for themselves. It is a classic story about the dysfunctional process of blame.
I can certainly see how someone might interpret this way.For example, (and I apologize for bringing this forth, but its application is primary) when one person refuses to shake the hand of the other because of differences, then non-acceptance, exclusion, blame, etc. are what is being communicated.
Especially a person who may have been the victim of blame, exclusion, and non-acceptance. Such experiences make human beings vulnerable, and inclined to perceive insults.
Shaking the hand of another may also be just a polite courtesy, and hide the reality that those sentiments do, in fact, exist anyway.
Perhaps, or perhaps one just does not subscribe to the notion that handshaking creates communion, or removes differences. Diplomats will often practice courtesies or shake hands while still entertaining emnity in the heart.The person who refuses to shake hands is communicating that he is holding something against the other.
It seems that you are erroneously equating handshaking with forgiveness or freedom from resentment. This may be true for you, and you may demonstrate you forgiveness of others by handshaking, but it is not approporiate to expect everyone else to conform to you practices. I have seen people in church who won’t shake hands because they have a cold, or don’t want to get a cold. It does not mean they are holding resentments.Now, the person who refuses may well have decided to forgive the other, but the decision is not manifested in something real, something that involves a freedom to love.
You seem to be suggesting that, if a person does not conform to your standards of what is considered conciliatory/forgiving behavior then they are holding resentment and unforgiveness in their heart. This seems like quite a strong expectation to place on other human beings.
Beyond that, forgiveness gives freedom to the one that forgives, as much or more to the recipient. For you to day it is not “real” unless a person shakes hands is to invalidate the value of the forgiveness. Some people need to forgive those who have already died, or are incapacitated. If there is no way to shake hands, does that make their forgiveness “unreal” and constrict them from love? I think not.
I think that any observer can make the same assumptions we have all made about the crowd, or even about Judas. In the end, we can only speculate about what is in the minds and hearts of others.Code:I think it is plain to the observer that the person who refuses to shake hands has not forgiven. Do you see what I mean about the meaning of forgiveness? It is more than a decision, but the decision is a huge start.
Judas walked up to Jesus and greeted Him with a kiss. Does that mean he harbored nothing against Him?
Yes. I think it is a challenge to call people to accountability without using blame.Code:I agree, but such disappointment also may be communicated in such a way that the child experiences the same effects as blame. Blame is the communication of something negative about the other, something unacceptable about the other, in the general use of the term.
I think the salient difference is separating the person from the behavior. Accountability addresses the behavior as the problem, blame sends the message the person is bad/wrong.
I guess that is a matter of perception. It seems to me that God found a way to save humanity through Noah and his family.I think that the image of a God who sends people to hell for offenses is one that depicts a wrathful God, and this image is very natural. God in the story of Noah is wrathful/condemning.
This seems to be a very myopic view of the OT.Code:If God is angry about offenses, then what naturally follows (for humans who project such) is blame/condemnation. This is the image presented in the OT. From the cross, Jesus presents a different image.
I read the OT, so that may be why I perceive the image of God presented there different.Code:Feel free to disagree. Your apologetics may look a little different than mine, and that's okay.
I don’t think we can assume the Apostles lack forgiveness, just because they were calling it like it is. Jesus also stood before them, forgiveness in bodily form, and said nothing to condemn them, yet they blamed him and put Him to death. It wsa not a function of who Jesus was, it was a function of who the Sanhedrin were.Code:We reap what we sow, guanophore. You brought forth the response of the Sanhedrin; they were angry. If the apostles had communicated forgiveness of the Sanhedrin, then the outcome may have been different.