What do you think of greeters?

[zab]

I feel this is a manufactured “ministry” in an attempt to create a sense of greater involvement. And, unfortunately, as with many “ministries” it becomes all about the “minister”.

Yes, it makes people feel good about themselves. But that’s not what Mass is for or is the reason why we should be attending, eh? I like to take those moments approaching the church to quietly and prayerfully begin to empty myself out. It’s odd that I should have to stop praying in order to return an artificial smile that keeps growing more insistent the more I attempt to not be distracted by it.

Hopefully I am not stomping on an tender toes and egos. Peace.

:: putting on my flame-retardant underoos for the introspectively attired ::

I think you are wrong. The greeting apostolate is not about the “minister”. It is about wanting to make people feel welcome in attending our church. Do I think this is necessary? No. But apparrently many people do. In our parish, greeters came about after having had “Listening Sessions” when a new pastor arrived. That was one of the things that some felt was needed. I have always felt welcome in our parish, but apparrently some people felt that they weren’t being welcomed and they shared the experience they had received in other churches.

 

[DOShea]

I feel this is a manufactured “ministry” in an attempt to create a sense of greater involvement. And, unfortunately, as with many “ministries” it becomes all about the “minister”.

Yes, it makes people feel good about themselves. But that’s not what Mass is for or is the reason why we should be attending, eh? I like to take those moments approaching the church to quietly and prayerfully begin to empty myself out. It’s odd that I should have to stop praying in order to return an artificial smile that keeps growing more insistent the more I attempt to not be distracted by it.

Hopefully I am not stomping on an tender toes and egos. Peace.

:: putting on my flame-retardant underoos for the introspectively attired ::

Can’t speak for all of them, only for the one in my parish. It was the Pastor who “manufactured” it, asking the ushers if they would assign one more to the schedule for each Mass so that two of them could stand outside and answer questions or direct people to where they need to go. It wasn’t someone trying to “be important,” it was doing as our Pastor requested. All ushers rotate their turns outside as well as inside. Our church has no room at the back behind the nave, just two doors to the outside, so there is no room to congregate in where you can hang out and have conversations. You’re either “in” church or you aren’t. Once inside, you’ve got about 15 seconds to start moving toward a pew or an usher will come over and escort you to one. We don’t have a problem with noise and distractions before Mass, well, save for one very elderly gentleman who is extremely hard of hearing, but he knows it and usually doesn’t speak at all.

Realize also we are less than 1/4 mile away from a university, and we get college students of all flavors who show up at Mass almost every week. Since the Pastor put them there, he has received much favorable correspondence thanking him for having such courteous and helpful greeters. I don’t think they are going away anytime soon.

 

[Cat]

Greeters and ushers do different jobs.

Basically, greeters do their work OUTSIDE of the nave. Their job is fairly simple: they welcome people who enter the church building and answer any questions, mainly practical questions like “Where the bathroom?” and “Where’s the Knights of Columbus Pancake breakfast?”

Some of you don’t want to be greeted. Fine. But many of us DO want to see a friendly face and receive a heartfelt greeting: “Good evening!” or “Good morning!” My job sucks bad, and after facing nasty people all day long, I really enjoy coming to Mass and seeing a friendly, welcoming human face. It helps me remember that there are still a few nice people left in this world. If you don’t need the human touch at Mass, count your blessings, because you are darn lucky.

And I think a lot of people are where I’m at–weak and puny and low in their hearts and desperately in need of a friendly word of welcome instead of the garbage they hear in their lives outside of church.

Visitors and strangers, especially non-Catholics, usually like to be welcomed. No one likes to walk into a Christian church and be utterly ignored, or worse, treated as a “distraction” to worship. Try, try TRY to pretend that you are NOT a Catholic, that you have never been in a Catholic Church, that you have no idea what the “proper etiquette” is, that you don’t even know what a Mass is (you think it’s just another "worship service), that all your life you’ve been taught that Catholicism is a Babylonian mystery cult where the adherents worship pagan goddesses and dead people, and you are scared to death to walk through the doors into this very strange place and sit among these weird cultists.

People who have grown up like this are pleasantly surprised and relieved when they walk into a Catholic church and a friendly, normal-looking person who is not a man wearing a dress with a picture of Mary on it says, “Hello, welcome.”

But if everyone walks by them and ignores them, the visitor is going to be spooked. Yes, that’s the right word, as offensive as it might be to you.

The visitor will not be impressed with the reverence because their definition of “reverence” is totally different than the definition that a traditional-leaning Catholic has. To a Catholic with traditional leanings, “reverence” is equated with silence and stillness. To a Protestant raised in the evangelical, fundamental, or Pentecostal tradition, “reverence” is equated with “feelings” and the expression of those feelings. Friendliness is a natural consequence of “reverence” to a Protestant. To a Protestant, a church that is not friendly is not a Christian church.

So we’re talking two different animals here. Someone’s going to have to yield a little. Catholics can dig in their heels and grit their teeth and murmur through clenched jaws, “We don’t have to give up our tradition of utter silence just to please a few heretic Protestants.”

OR–Catholics can say, “Praise GOD, Protestants are beginning to come home again! It won’t hurt me to smile and tolerate them them as they become accustomed to the Catholic way of worship. Eventually they’ll convert to the True Church and then they’ll join me in silent adoration of the Lord in the Blessed Sacrament because then they’ll understand WHY I love the silence. But right now, they’re no different than those little babies who scream all the way through Mass. They don’t understand, and it’s up to us who are Catholics to gently help them to learn and understand and accept and love the Church of Jesus Christ.”

And just because some greeters overdo it and gush does not mean that the job is unnecessary or “un-Catholic.” Welcoming people and making them feel loved and warm and safe is a noble job. It does not have to be done in such a way to encourage loudness and “chatting” and disrespect for Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. The best greeters are often quiet and pleasant. No one likes a loud, obnoxious greeter who reminds them of a pressure salesman.

Ushers do their work INSIDE the nave. Their job is more complex and they have many tasks. My husband is an usher. He is a quiet, reserved man who would definitely feel uncomfortable as a “greeter.” As an usher, he helps set up the church for the Mass (not the sanctuary–the priest does that). The ushers make sure that the hymnals and missallettes are neat in the pews, set up the sound system and manage sound system during the Mass, assist people to find seats, direct traffic during Holy Communion, take up the offering, and respond to any emergencies (e.g., a person who collapses during the Mass–the ushers will call the ambulance and help the family or friends). Ushers also are responsible for letting the EMHCs know about people who are unable to process to the front for Holy Communion so that the EMHCs can bring Holy Communion to them.

After Mass, the ushers “clean up” the church, setting hymnals up, picking up toys and other left-behind objects, and sometimes cleaning up food and drink that parents or children have spilled.

As for the priest doing the work of the greeter–well, I don’t know about your parish. But at OUR parish, we have nine Masses on the weekends, and there is a half-hour between Masses and that half-hour goes faster than a blink! The priests are mere frail humans and they have to go potty, get a drink of water or cup of coffee, perhaps take meds, rest their tired feet and knees, and perhaps even pray by themselves during the very short time between Masses.

I’m sorry to sound so crabby, but honestly, I can’t believe that Christians would find fault with friendliness and welcome. It’s just so discouraging to me. If it’s not being done WELL at your parish, that’s a shame. But rather than criticizing a very good practice and labelling it “non-Catholic”, then figure out what is going wrong and implement changes so that greeting (and ushering) are done with excellence, in such a way that new people are made to feel welcome and those who prefer to be left alone are not annoyed or harassed, and most importantly so that the nave is kept quiet for prayer and contemplation of Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. Stop complaining and start improving.

The Catholic Church is all about “complete” Christianity. We don’t get just a piece of the pie in the Catholic Church, we get the whole pie to feast on. Surely we can figure out ways to implement the excellent work of “greeting people” and at the same time, continue to promote the excellent traditions of the Catholic faith. You don’t have to give up one for the other. You can actually have both.

 

[puzzleannie]

I

would much rather it be Clergy who do the greetings at Church. They are more responsible and sensitive to souls of our Brothers and Sisters…

I would much rather the priest were in the confessional before Mass, as at our parish.

I simply do not get the the reaction “the greeters at our parish, or some parish I visited, are a distraction and one said something to me that riled me up, so therefore all greeters everywhere are bad, evil, detract from liturgy and are a V2 liberal new age plot”

in the narthex or vestibule IS outside

 

[Cat]

I would much rather the priest were in the confessional before Mass, as at our parish.

I simply do not get the the reaction “the greeters at our parish, or some parish I visited, are a distraction and one said something to me that riled me up, so therefore all greeters everywhere are bad, evil, detract from liturgy and are a V2 liberal new age plot”

in the narthex or vestibule IS outside

Bless you!

I don’t get the reaction either and it makes my heart sick. I respect traditional-leaning Catholics who want silence before Mass, but I don’t see why they can’t just ignore the greeters out in the “narthex” (or whatever it’s called at your church).

The Bible is full of admonitions to consider others more important than ourselves. If someone’s cheery “Hello, welcome!” is going to encourage another person to convert to Catholicism, then I am willing to forego my personal preferences.

 

[EasterJoy]

The Bible is full of admonitions to consider others more important than ourselves. If someone’s cheery “Hello, welcome!” is going to encourage another person to convert to Catholicism, then I am willing to forego my personal preferences.

Greeters, in my experience, have several functions:

1. To reassure a Catholic coming back, going through a depression, having some problem with the Church, etc., that it does matter to somebody whether or not they come to Mass. It is a concrete reminder that the other parishioners aren’t just there “to get theirs”.
2. To make non-Catholics feel that the Catholics are glad they are there, and that they’re not sneaking in. This is more important than we might think. We don’t do that well on this count, according to non-Catholic feedback I’ve gotten. I’ve had many, if not most, non-Catholics tell me that the Catholic Church is very “user unfriendly”, because it is hard to follow the missal with no prior knowledge, for instance. It is nice to provide someone who looks glad that they’re there and willing to answer questions.
3. To provide a “somebody” to ask questions of…where is the bathroom? When does this Mass start? Do you know who the celebrant is today? Are they pulling the kids during the Liturgy of the Word today? Our grandson is being baptized today; do you know if there’s a particular place we’re supposed to sit? If you’re not from the parish, or new to it, it is hard to just grab someone randomly for questions. A greeter doesn’t have to have the answers, just know where to find them.

In other words, that most of us don’t “need” a greeter doesn’t mean they don’t serve an important function.

 

[Ockham]

Well friend then you have not met me . And if you don’t like to be greeted then avoid that.

I go to Mass to worship God, not greet you. Were there “Greeters” at Calvary?

 

[tweetymom]

I go to Mass to worship God, not greet you. Were there “Greeters” at Calvary?

Women! And I worship God everywhere. And am happy to greet people to worship and praise:wave: a risen Savior

 

[tcm22]

It makes me laugh a little to see people get indignant and self-righteous over someone holding the door, saying good morning, and handing them a missalette on the way into Mass.

 

[tweetymom]

It makes me laugh a little to see people get indignant and self-righteous over someone holding the door, saying good morning, and handing them a missalette on the way into Mass.

By the way I do not hold the door open for them, hand out Missalette, or a bulletin. w:shrug:ho is indignant of self righteous? Maybe you?

 

[Maria_Raphael]

The greeters at our parish are very helpful. It’s a Cathedral parish and there are often tourists or visitors who don’t know their way around, so it is good to have someone available to point them in the right direction. They usually keep things very short, just saying hi and handing out a missal (we don’t store them in the pews) as people walk in.

When my husband and I first came, it certainly helped us feel less nervous.

As for our priest, he appreciates the help and has said so!

 

[ac_claire]

Oooo, yeah. That REALLY bothers me as well. I’ve attended a few parishes that had something similar to this and it was some of the most hostile and unwelcome experiences I ever had at churches. I would have rather not had any greeters or ushers at all. There was a church we attended in VA while we were visiting my aunt. My family and I got lost on the way to the church and got there right when the processional hymn began. These women (basically acted like guards) barred us and anyone else from entering the church while the hymn was being sung. They smiled the entire time, but like you, I felt this underlining hostility towards those who didn’t make inside prior to the processional hymn beginning. It was almost as if they were enjoying their role a little too much. It also was a little bit like they were treating it as a concert or theater one might attend where people are held outside of the theater until the movement, song cycle, aria, etc. is completed - except at those places, I have never felt that underlining hostility.

Yes, exactly. Well I’m glad to hear it’s not just my church lol.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but, I assume by the term “narthex” your speaking about the columned entrance area seen in some Basilica’s and Cathedrals?

Uhmm…well, I may be the wrong one. Not sure. When I say “narthex” I’m talking about the main lobby area of a Catholic church, with doors leading to the sanctuary, the bathrooms off to the side, etc., etc.

 

[whatevergirl]

It makes me laugh a little to see people get indignant and self-righteous over someone holding the door, saying good morning, and handing them a missalette on the way into Mass.

lol, Yeah, it’s not a bad thing at all, if it’s done with love. Not necessary, but I have found it to be a very nice touch. I don’t see anything wrong with it.

 

[japhy]

I go to Mass to worship God, not greet you. Were there “Greeters” at Calvary?

I go to Mass to worship God, too. And because there are other people there, I acknowledge their presence. Mass is not a second-for-second replay of Calvary.

 

[revert_jen]

People (including greeters) have to understand that not everyone is going to be comfortable with being greeted. When I was away from the Church, I attended several protestant churches with greeters. In those cases, I was in similar situation to a protestant visiting a Catholic church, in that I didn’t know how things worked at the new church. Nonetheless, greeters left me feeling exposed and watched, and made me uncomfortable. I’m sure that the people were trying to be friendly, but it made me feel like people were watching me, which made me a LOT more nervous about not knowing what was going on.

Greeters need to be educated to recognize the signs of people who prefer to figure out what’s going on by quietly watching others. I must say that I was actually a lot more comfortable with people who greeted you after the service. This also helps direct people to the coffee and doughnuts.

In addition, especially these days, some people don’t want to shake hands with strangers, but also don’t want to offend anyone, so the greeters should look welcoming but maybe should not offer their hand to everyone.

Also, as it is a Catholic church, greeters should speak in subdued tones, unless someone turns out to be hard of hearing. It is possible to be friendly without being loud.

If they can keep these things in mind it might be OK. Obviously, personally I prefer not to have them, but I know people are different and some people would be happier with them.

–Jen

 

[sunnygirl807]

This thread reminded me of my 1st impressions of the church. Prior to my conversion, I knew nothing and I mean NOTHING about the Catholic Church. I was looking for a church home. I spoke with the priest, explained my situation to him over the telephone. I was impressed because he answered all of my questions and he was so patient. Anyway, he invited me to mass that Sunday. I didn’t know anyone Catholic and I had no idea what to expect, but I said if the priest was so nice surely I would have a pleasant experience. So I ventured out alone with my bible in hand (former Baptist:blush Needless to say I was completely lost. I didn’t know when to stand, sit, kneel. I did have a lady tell me I didn’t need my bible when she saw me fumbling through the pages. LOST. No one said hello or ask who I was. I was shocked, but on the up note, I felt the presence of God at that church. So I continued to go and joined the church. But I hate to think of the people that were lost like me and no one offered a helping hand, a smile, or any small gesture. This was a huge parish, and it would be impossible for the priest to greet everyone and have time to reflect and prepare for the next mass. If a person has questions who can they ask when it seems there is race for the front door when mass is over. This is where greeters would be needed. So to all the greeters:thumbsup:

I go to another parish now on the other side of town. It is in a not-so-great part of town, but I like it. The people are nice and helpful, with greeters. No one is imposing. They even sit visitors with families, if needed. The visitors can fill out contact cards and someone from the parish calls. Visitors can come and have Sunday dinner after Mass (and the beeline to the front door is to the basement for dinner. The majority of the members actually stay for dinner) These little gestures makes people feel welcome and the parish is growing because of it.

 

[EasterJoy]

I go to Mass to worship God, not greet you. Were there “Greeters” at Calvary?

You can complain to St. Paul:
“All the brothers greet you. Greet one another with a holy kiss.” 1 Cor. 16:20
*“Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the holy ones greet you.” *1 Cor. 13:12
*“Greet all the brothers with a holy kiss.” *1 Thess. 5:26

He gets very specific in Romans:
*“I commend to you Phoebe our sister, who is (also) a minister of the church at Cenchreae, that you may receive her in the Lord in a manner worthy of the holy ones, and help her in whatever she may need from you, for she has been a benefactor to many and to me as well.
Greet Prisca and Aquila, my co-workers in Christ Jesus, who risked their necks for my life, to whom not only I am grateful but also all the churches of the Gentiles;
greet also the church at their house.
Greet my beloved Epaenetus, who was the firstfruits in Asia for Christ.
Greet Mary, who has worked hard for you.
Greet Andronicus and Junia, my relatives and my fellow prisoners; they are prominent among the apostles and they were in Christ before me.
Greet Ampliatus, my beloved in the Lord.
Greet Urbanus, our co-worker in Christ, and my beloved Stachys.
Greet Apelles, who is approved in Christ.
Greet those who belong to the family of Aristobulus.
Greet my relative Herodion.
Greet those in the Lord who belong to the family of Narcissus.
Greet those workers in the Lord, Tryphaena and Tryphosa.
Greet the beloved Persis, who has worked hard in the Lord.
Greet Rufus, chosen in the Lord, and his mother and mine.
Greet Asyncritus, Phlegon, Hermes, Patrobas, Hermas, and the brothers who are with them.
Greet Philologus, Julia, Nereus and his sister, and Olympas, and all the holy ones who are with them.
Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ greet you.
I urge you, brothers, to watch out for those who create dissensions and obstacles, in opposition to the teaching that you learned; avoid them.” *Rom. 16:1-17

It isn’t the Gospel, strictly speaking, but it is the inspired word of God. Count yourself fortunate, then, that you are not being given a holy kiss as you walk into church, instead of only a smile, a nod, or a handshake!

Seriously, though, where does this “I go to Mass to worship God, not greet you” come from? Where, theologically speaking, did you ever get the idea that at Mass you approach Calvary alone? If we do not approach God as one, we do not keep the explicit commandment of Christ, who bid us to be one* as He and the Father are one*. How can we dare approach God, if we don’t keep the most basic of commandments?

I’d say quite seriously that if you imagine you do approach God apart from your brothers, and hold anything against them or them against you as you do so, re-think that. If the only show of fraternal charity that’s being asked is a nod or a handshake, you’re getting off rather easy. Just a thought. One as He and the Father are one…That’s a pretty big order, and no shirking allowed.

 

[martinpaul12]

Hi ishii,

Well,They are not necessary. I think having them fosters too casual of an atmosphere.
Also, I am a strong introvert personalities and Don’t know the exact behaviour of greeters.I also don’t know the advantages of mass regarding greeters.

Thanks

 

[ishii]

Sorry you feel that way.Oh by the way I am 70 and don’t act the way you have offered. Even when we get older we know how to have manners:tiphat:

I wish that were true for the folks I was dealing with…

Ishii

 

[Cat]

People (including greeters) have to understand that not everyone is going to be comfortable with being greeted. When I was away from the Church, I attended several protestant churches with greeters. In those cases, I was in similar situation to a protestant visiting a Catholic church, in that I didn’t know how things worked at the new church. Nonetheless, greeters left me feeling exposed and watched, and made me uncomfortable. I’m sure that the people were trying to be friendly, but it made me feel like people were watching me, which made me a LOT more nervous about not knowing what was going on.

Greeters need to be educated to recognize the signs of people who prefer to figure out what’s going on by quietly watching others. I must say that I was actually a lot more comfortable with people who greeted you after the service. This also helps direct people to the coffee and doughnuts.

In addition, especially these days, some people don’t want to shake hands with strangers, but also don’t want to offend anyone, so the greeters should look welcoming but maybe should not offer their hand to everyone.

Also, as it is a Catholic church, greeters should speak in subdued tones, unless someone turns out to be hard of hearing. It is possible to be friendly without being loud.

If they can keep these things in mind it might be OK. Obviously, personally I prefer not to have them, but I know people are different and some people would be happier with them.

–Jen

The reason you felt “watched” in the Protestant church had nothing to do with greeters.

You WERE being watched and prayed for by everyone in the congregation, or at least, by all the “involved” people in the congregation, because the word quickly went around the congregation that a “Catholic” was visiting (yes, they knew that you were Catholic, even if you didn’t tell them!), and the people wanted to see you renounce Catholicism and become a “real” Christian by inviting Jesus into your heart to be your personal Lord and Savior.

They probably kept praying for you after you left the worship service that day, and there is probably still someone from that church praying for your conversion because you are on their “prayer list” and they want you to “get saved.”

I don’t see this “watching thing” happening in Catholic churches. Catholics don’t keep track of how many converts they “lead to the Lord” like the evangelical Protestants do. Catholics are much more laid back in their evangelism strategies, and that’s a good thing, IMO!

(BTW, I was evangelical Protestant for 47 years, and I’ve prayed for the salvation of many a Catholic visiting our churches! So I speak the truth.)