What has denim ever done to you?

[DarkLight]

Funny!

Denim skirts and chambray skirts are definitely OK, and I would think that the denim jumper for women would also be fine. Presumably denim capris with a tunic would also be church-suitable. And from there, we are perilously close to denim jeans…

There’s a particular sort of denim skirt and denim jumper that those of us who grew up fundamentalist know - and if we’ve left generally have an allergy to. But I think the problem there was less the fabric, and more that they tended towards the sort of long shapeless piece that made you look like a cult member. I have yet to see a woman who is flattered in such a piece.

But yes, I’ve worn a pair of nice dark jeans with a nice top to church. I was walking to church in January in the north and there’s three feet of snow on the ground.

 

[Demetra2]

I like to dress up for church ,however, I have worn denim jeans and see nothing wrong with it. There is nothing disrespectful about wearing denim (no holes, please). The important thing is to come to church in the first place.

 

[1newcatholic]

This thread made me sad.

I struggle just to make it to Mass. I have obstacles that I have already discussed with several priests. Their advice to me has been, “Just do your best to make it.”

I don’t understand why costuming is so important to people. When I put on the dress clothes I bought on my limited income, I feel like a fat guy in cheap clothes. I feel like I am wearing a costume, pretending on Sunday to be someone I am not during the rest of the week. The suit makes me feel like a liar and a hypocrite, and I swore to myself I would leave that behind when I became a Catholic.

Plus, at my parish, someone dressed up in an actual suit stands out like a sore thumb–most of us are wearing slacks or jeans, because we live in a poor, working-class neighborhood in an area of the world that is very expensive just to inhabit.

Now, people are saying I must wear a costume if I am to be properly received at church, that good Catholics will be offended if I don’t dress up to please them. I don’t need any more obstacles–I just want to be able to show up to Mass and feel welcome. Is that unreasonable?

 

[cheezey]

This thread made me sad.

I struggle just to make it to Mass. I have obstacles that I have already discussed with several priests. Their advice to me has been, “Just do your best to make it.”

I don’t understand why costuming is so important to people. When I put on the dress clothes I bought on my limited income, I feel like a fat guy in cheap clothes. I feel like I am wearing a costume, pretending on Sunday to be someone I am not during the rest of the week. The suit makes me feel like a liar and a hypocrite, and I swore to myself I would leave that behind when I became a Catholic.

Plus, at my parish, someone dressed up in an actual suit stands out like a sore thumb–most of us are wearing slacks or jeans, because we live in a poor, working-class neighborhood in an area of the world that is very expensive just to inhabit.

Now, people are saying I must wear a costume if I am to be properly received at church, that good Catholics will be offended if I don’t dress up to please them. I don’t need any more obstacles–I just want to be able to show up to Mass and feel welcome. Is that unreasonable?

No.

Many Blessings to you.

:hug3:

 

[EasterJoy]

This thread made me sad.

I struggle just to make it to Mass. I have obstacles that I have already discussed with several priests. Their advice to me has been, “Just do your best to make it.”

I don’t understand why costuming is so important to people. When I put on the dress clothes I bought on my limited income, I feel like a fat guy in cheap clothes. I feel like I am wearing a costume, pretending on Sunday to be someone I am not during the rest of the week. The suit makes me feel like a liar and a hypocrite, and I swore to myself I would leave that behind when I became a Catholic.

Plus, at my parish, someone dressed up in an actual suit stands out like a sore thumb–most of us are wearing slacks or jeans, because we live in a poor, working-class neighborhood in an area of the world that is very expensive just to inhabit.

Now, people are saying I must wear a costume if I am to be properly received at church, that good Catholics will be offended if I don’t dress up to please them. I don’t need any more obstacles–I just want to be able to show up to Mass and feel welcome. Is that unreasonable?

No, it is not unreasonable to ask to be welcomed, no matter what you wear. This issue has been around since the beginning:

“My brothers, show no partiality as you adhere to the faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ. For if a man with gold rings on his fingers and in fine clothes comes into your assembly, and a poor person in shabby clothes also comes in, and you pay attention to the one wearing the fine clothes and say, “Sit here, please,” while you say to the poor one, “Stand there,” or “Sit at my feet,” have you not made distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil designs? Listen, my beloved brothers. Did not God choose those who are poor 3 in the world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom that he promised to those who love him? But you dishonored the poor person…” James 2:1-6

People do think that a pair of Dockers that cost nearly half what a pair of Levi’s cost are more appropriate for worship, that is all that is being said, because in general jeans are considered leisure wear and slacks are more serious. It is not about the money spent. If anyone uses even that loose guideline as an excuse to show anyone the least bit of disrespect, rather than as a guide to choose their own clothing, the person judging on clothing is in the wrong. The Scriptures have cautions against showing off with clothing, too, and no one can be asked to do more than their best.

 

[cheezey]

No, it is not unreasonable to ask to be welcomed, no matter what you wear. This issue has been around since the beginning:

“My brothers, show no partiality as you adhere to the faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ. For if a man with gold rings on his fingers and in fine clothes comes into your assembly, and a poor person in shabby clothes also comes in, and you pay attention to the one wearing the fine clothes and say, “Sit here, please,” while you say to the poor one, “Stand there,” or “Sit at my feet,” have you not made distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil designs? Listen, my beloved brothers. Did not God choose those who are poor 3 in the world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom that he promised to those who love him? But you dishonored the poor person…” James 2:1-6

People do think that a pair of Dockers that cost less than a pair of Levi’s are more appropriate for worship, that is all that is being said, because in general jeans are considered leisure wear and slacks are more serious. If anyone uses that as an excuse to show anyone the least bit of disrespect, rather than as a guide to choose their own clothing, the person judging on clothing is in the wrong. The Scriptures have cautions against showing off with clothing, too, and no one can be asked to do more than their best.

:clapping:

thank you for this…

 

[emerson97]

I haven’t read all of the replies. But here are some of my thoughts:

I do wear jeans to church sometimes, especially in winter. I currently own three pairs of pants that fit me, one of which is denim, so yes, it is thrown into the church-going mix from time to time. I figure God would rather have me as I am than not there because nothing nice fit well, was clean, looked nice enough, etc.

Also, there were periods in my life when care of myself was so low on the totem pole, where functioning from day to day was a chore. During those times it was all I could do to get to Mass much less give two hoots about what I looked like. I remember wearing holey workout pants, ratty sweatshirt and tennis shoes on more than one occasion. Hair in a ponytail with no makeup was not uncommon. Those were the days I really needed.to be at mass, though, and I’m glad I went. Good knew where my heart was, he knew were my head was, and I trust that he understood. It was all part of the journey. I’m in a different place now, but I wouldn’t be here unless I was first there.

 

[EasterJoy]

I haven’t read all of the replies. But here are some of my thoughts:

I do wear jeans to church sometimes, especially in winter. I currently own three pairs of pants that fit me, one of which is denim, so yes, it is thrown into the church-going mix from time to time. I figure God would rather have me as I am than not there because nothing nice fit well, was clean, looked nice enough, etc.

Also, there were periods in my life when care of myself was so low on the totem pole, where functioning from day to day was a chore. During those times it was all I could do to get to Mass much less give two hoots about what I looked like. I remember wearing holey workout pants, ratty sweatshirt and tennis shoes on more than one occasion. Hair in a ponytail with no makeup was not uncommon. Those were the days I really needed.to be at mass, though, and I’m glad I went. Good knew where my heart was, he knew were my head was, and I trust that he understood. It was all part of the journey. I’m in a different place now, but I wouldn’t be here unless I was first there.

This is a good point: that is, when we think of the “poor” who we know are only wearing what they have to wear, we think of poor in terms of what they own or what we have seen them wearing in the past. In forcing our judging minds to withhold judgment, it helps to remind ourselves that being poor can also mean barely having enough juice in our veins to get out of bed and out into the world, including out to church. In that state, even if we are exerting a more heroic effort to get to Mass than anyone else there, we’re going to show up looking pretty slovenly, as if we’ve barely made an effort at all. There is no excuse for looking like a slob when we could do better, but it is not ours to judge what someone else’s best is, and that best can change from one day to the next. The more often we remind ourselves of that, the better. The response to someone who shows up looking like an unmade bed, then, is “it is good to see you…how are you doing today?” Check in to see if that person needs some love and attention. If they’re OK, mind your own business and move on.

Some day, it will be each of us, standing before the Throne with no excuses for ourselves and our failures, so the more excuses we’ve made for others, the better off we’ll be. Let’s keep these threads about how to keep our own hair combed, then.

 

[MomaMary8]

This thread made me sad.

I struggle just to make it to Mass. I have obstacles that I have already discussed with several priests. Their advice to me has been, “Just do your best to make it.”

I don’t understand why costuming is so important to people. When I put on the dress clothes I bought on my limited income, I feel like a fat guy in cheap clothes. I feel like I am wearing a costume, pretending on Sunday to be someone I am not during the rest of the week. The suit makes me feel like a liar and a hypocrite, and I swore to myself I would leave that behind when I became a Catholic.

Plus, at my parish, someone dressed up in an actual suit stands out like a sore thumb–most of us are wearing slacks or jeans, because we live in a poor, working-class neighborhood in an area of the world that is very expensive just to inhabit.

Now, people are saying I must wear a costume if I am to be properly received at church, that good Catholics will be offended if I don’t dress up to please them. I don’t need any more obstacles–I just want to be able to show up to Mass and feel welcome. Is that unreasonable?

Yes, the priority is to get to mass. I don’t think anyone would disagree with that. Clothes should not be a “costume” but a reflection of you. It is a common held belief that the outward appearance reflects the inward disposition. I don’t know if we mere humans can ever get away from that Many of us have had hard times and owned very little clothing or had vey little emotional stamina to dress-up. Every morning I try to dress nice. I don’t want to wear to mass the same outfit I’d wear to the park. It’s a small mortification for me. Another’s mortification may be to simply make it to mass!

As for the light hearted question to start this thread: my daughters killed denim for me (as I said in a previous post.). So, carry on my friends. Go To Church and PRAY! I promise not to look at you except when you smile to wish me peace. If you see me in the same outfit as you saw me in the park, pray for me. I had a rough morning.

 

[thewanderer]

This is a good point: that is, when we think of the “poor” who we know are only wearing what they have to wear, we think of poor in terms of what they own or what we have seen them wearing in the past. In forcing our judging minds to withhold judgment, it helps to remind ourselves that being poor can also mean barely having enough juice in our veins to get out of bed and out into the world, including out to church. In that state, even if we are exerting a more heroic effort to get to Mass than anyone else there, we’re going to show up looking pretty slovenly, as if we’ve barely made an effort at all. There is no excuse for looking like a slob when we could do better, but it is not ours to judge what someone else’s best is, and that best can change from one day to the next. The more often we remind ourselves of that, the better. The response to someone who shows up looking like an unmade bed, then, is “it is good to see you…how are you doing today?” Check in to see if that person needs some love and attention. If they’re OK, mind your own business and move on.

Some day, it will be each of us, standing before the Throne with no excuses for ourselves and our failures, so the more excuses we’ve made for others, the better off we’ll be. Let’s keep these threads about how to keep our own hair combed, then.

 

[DarkLight]

This is a good point: that is, when we think of the “poor” who we know are only wearing what they have to wear, we think of poor in terms of what they own or what we have seen them wearing in the past. In forcing our judging minds to withhold judgment, it helps to remind ourselves that being poor can also mean barely having enough juice in our veins to get out of bed and out into the world, including out to church. In that state, even if we are exerting a more heroic effort to get to Mass than anyone else there, we’re going to show up looking pretty slovenly, as if we’ve barely made an effort at all. There is no excuse for looking like a slob when we could do better, but it is not ours to judge what someone else’s best is, and that best can change from one day to the next. The more often we remind ourselves of that, the better. The response to someone who shows up looking like an unmade bed, then, is “it is good to see you…how are you doing today?” Check in to see if that person needs some love and attention. If they’re OK, mind your own business and move on.

Some day, it will be each of us, standing before the Throne with no excuses for ourselves and our failures, so the more excuses we’ve made for others, the better off we’ll be. Let’s keep these threads about how to keep our own hair combed, then.

Definitely. I’ve had similar experiences from not owning a car. My clothing for church gets less “nice” as the winter goes on, because it is cold and slippery out. I need to have on sensible shoes rather than women’s dress shoes, and something that won’t be dragging ice in everywhere. So I wear a nice tunic sweater and some jeans.

 

[davetv]

I think rather than coming up with a dress code that we can impose on others or ourselves, it is best to approach the subject of what to wear to Mass with the “right attitude.” The right attitude is to wear the best of what you normally wear or better. So if you normally wear jeans everyday, then you should wear the newest, cleanest, and nicest looking jeans you own. The attitude of giving God our best is what’s important, not to get hung up on fabric or a particular style.