What I don't like about Catholics...as a Catholic.

[Apryl]

Speaking of what you wear. Here is what I think is a good story.

I have gone to the same CC and Catholic School since I was born. I was born in this Church, had all the Sacraments, and even Marriage.

Now everyone knew me, and my Dad, Mom, Family etc. But it was a big Church so many just knew the faces, knew us together.

So anyway we always dressed up. Well this one Sunday my Husband and I were going on a bike run and did not have time to get changed, so went to Church in the Biker gear.

SO as we got off the bike this Man came over, not Old either about early 50’s and said I want to say I think it is great that you came to Church? My husband looked at eachother and were like OKAY

Well you should have seen his face when it hit him who we were! Goes to show you, do not judge a book by its cover.

I have gone to that CHurch LONG before that Man had, It was MY DAD who welcomed him years before.

Reminded me of the Biker Sticker. Jesus died for Bikers too!!

But you never know who you are sitting by, or who you are talking too. And I am sure God was just as pleased with me in my jeans and vest that day, as he is with me in my Dress. He knows my heart, and he knows who I am. And when I went for the Eucharist, I still got Served

Maybe I’m just dense.

I don’t think that I am.

But I don’t see really where you stated that you couldn’t have put on something other than your ‘biker gear’. I mean, sure, you were on your way to a bike race. Does that trump the reverence and solemnity of the church and the sacredness of taking part in the Eucharist?

I don’t see how this person approaching you was some signal that what you were wearing became appropriate. I’m sure that visitors may not be aware of what is expected. But shouldn’t the family know better?

As a person who has spent many a Sunday going from one church to another, with bake sales and presentations and meetings and family events and plane rides all on the other side, I can’t see why your husband couldn’t have put a pair of real pants on over his biking shorts, or you couldn’t have put on a skirt or a jumper. Heck, I don’t wear pants to Mass, but you could have put on a pair of pants over your shorts, too.

Right?

I also think we all make mistakes Oops. Did I do that? Just because you did wear it, how do you think that makes it right?

You grew up in the church. Shouldn’t you be an example to those who are coming in? Shouldn’t you be an aid to those who come to church to find that sanctuary of piety? Rather than bringing in the secular world and events?

Don’t get me wrong: I’m not saying that you are a bad person or that you should have been prevented from taking part in the Eucharist. I am glad that you and your husband thought enough of making it to Mass, when others may have said, ‘I don’t have time’. Thank you for at least doing that. But I do have a problem with the idea of someone thinking, ‘hey, I wore my bike shorts, and it was kewl. Nothing happened. The walls didn’t fall in. You do it, too!’

Please, I hope you are not encouraging such items.

I see your story, but I don’t see your point.

 

[Apryl]

Because flip flops are all you can afford.
Because you’re homeless
Because your faith is weak, but budding, and you don’t know any better.
Because you feel closer to God wearing flip flops.

I’m sure if you sat down and thought about it instead of mindlessly passing judgment on others just because they’re different from you, you could figure out some other good reasons to wear flip flops yourself.

With God, lack of respect is in the mind and the heart, not on your feet.

If this were just about the homeless or those who could afford, nothing more or who had nothing more, this might be a valid point.

But when people don’t know better and they are corrected, then we get the ‘but what if they don’t have anything else?’ argument.

Why is it ok ot short change when it comes to matter of faith, but you wouldn’t short change in most other areas of your life?

 

[Farsight001]

Riiight.

Do not accuse me of ‘mindlessly passing judgment.’

The same people who drive to Mass in their BMWs, Mercedes-Benzes, and Lexuses every week can’t afford better than filthy flip-flops and obscene t-shirts?

No. Of course not. But I provided a few other explanations too. Why do you ignore those?

I am not speaking hypothetically. I see this every week. I am not speaking of the poor. Don’t play that ‘compassion’ card. I don’t care if your clothes come from Walmart or the parish free store. The poor wouldn’t be caught dead wearing what some of these Lexus owners wear.

I see it every week too. The difference between you and me, however, is that I get the person’s story before declaring them disrespectful. You pass judgment as the bible so blatantly said not to.

These Lexus people would not be caught dead dressed like that at a job interview. So who do they respect more?

I dress nicer for a job interview than I do for church too. But dressing up in a suit and tie is distracting to me. Flipflops, jeans, and a t-shirt, allow me to better concentrate on the mass. In a suit, I’m constantly distracted by the restrictive tie, cut of the pants, and uncomfortable shoes. What do you think God cares about more? That I dress nice or that I pay attention?

I believe that what you wear DOES reflect what’s in your mind and heart.

I’m going to be blunt - that’s a huge problem with the way you think. You don’t know what’s going through a person’s head. You don’t know their circumstances. You just know they’re not wearing clothes that are up to snub for you and that’s all you need to know. I can’t believe you don’t see what’s wrong with that. Have you never heard of “don’t judge a book by it’s cover”? That is EXACTLY what you are doing.

It’s not about your personal comfort. It’s about the great Sacrifice of the Mass.

Right. And I, as with many MANY other people, can’t properly pay attention to the great Sacrifice of the Mass in a stuffy suit. My personal comfort allows me to better see and comprehend what is truly happening. And when I am feeling low and unworthy, as I have so often recently due to all sorts of **** going on in my life, going to mass in ragged clothing feels reflective of my shame - like I am saying that I am not pure and clean and not worthy of appearing so before God. It’s almost like the modern day equivalent of pouring ash on my head and wearing sackcloth to me and I feel 1000 times closer to God when I do it than when I put on a face and act like nothing is wrong.

Perhaps you don’t have that problem, and that’s fine for you. But other people are not the same as you and you cannot expect them to be.

I’ve said this before and I will stand by it: you might feel great wearing your knockabout clothes, but (all else being equal) it’s not about personal comfort and convenience, but respect.

Then have a little respect - for those who can’t afford better clothes, or whose faith is weak and doesn’t know any better, etc. For someone so demanding of respect, you sure don’t give out much yourself.

 

[Todd520]

If this were just about the homeless or those who could afford, nothing more or who had nothing more, this might be a valid point.

But when people don’t know better and they are corrected, then we get the ‘but what if they don’t have anything else?’ argument.

Why is it ok ot short change when it comes to matter of faith, but you wouldn’t short change in most other areas of your life?

Yes, Catholics go to Mass to experience reverence, but they can fail to show it in their dress. If regular catholics attended in dressy clothing, new members would learn to dress accordingly. Homeless aside, GoodWill or Salvation Army sells ‘sunday’ clothing very cheap.

I found LDS to be the opposite. There is much less individuality shown, with a high degree of uniformity in Sunday dress (white shirts, ties & jackets). It bothered me at first but now I appreciate the purpose - of showing reverence.

 

[Farsight001]

But when people don’t know better and they are corrected, then we get the ‘but what if they don’t have anything else?’ argument.

People who don’t know any better and are weak in their faith often don’t understand when being corrected. They ask why it would matter and because they do not have a strong faith, and thus not a great proximity to God, cannot see that it would matter. But instead of getting down on them for it, as so many people here have, they need to be nurtured. If you see a sickly plant what do you do? Water it and get it sunlight. If you’re a bit nerdy, perhaps you talk to it (strange as it is, talking to a plant actually helps). You don’t kick the plant while its down. Like I said in my first post, I have a great friend who lost her newly budding faith because someone did that. It is counter productive to a person’s faith journey.

When dealing with a newly budding faith, or a weak faith, tact is key. I work in a mental health facility. I learned very quickly that something as simple as having my hands in my pocket when talking to a patient is enough of a difference to set them off - for them to attack me, or decide not to take to heart what I say. Every little detail counts. And while the effect of such subtleties are more pronounced in those with severe mental health problems, it holds true for everyone. Every little detail matters. People notice and are affected by what they don’t even realize they’ve noticed. Being careful is of the utmost importance, and kicking a person while they’re weak is not only obviously counterproductive and damaging to a budding faith (if not killing it outright), but is completely unchristian.

Isn’t there even a verse in the bible that goes something like “you will bear an account for every careless word you utter”? People need to keep that in mind more.

Why is it ok ot short change when it comes to matter of faith, but you wouldn’t short change in most other areas of your life?

Read my above post. You should see in presenting my perspective, that there is most certainly no short changing going on - at least for me. You are making the issue appear far simpler than it is.

 

[Sailor_Kenshin]

No. Of course not. But I provided a few other explanations too. Why do you ignore those?

I see it every week too. The difference between you and me, however, is that I get the person’s story before declaring them disrespectful. You pass judgment as the bible so blatantly said not to.

I dress nicer for a job interview than I do for church too. But dressing up in a suit and tie is distracting to me. Flipflops, jeans, and a t-shirt, allow me to better concentrate on the mass. In a suit, I’m constantly distracted by the restrictive tie, cut of the pants, and uncomfortable shoes. What do you think God cares about more? That I dress nice or that I pay attention?

I’m going to be blunt - that’s a huge problem with the way you think. You don’t know what’s going through a person’s head. You don’t know their circumstances. You just know they’re not wearing clothes that are up to snub for you and that’s all you need to know. I can’t believe you don’t see what’s wrong with that. Have you never heard of “don’t judge a book by it’s cover”? That is EXACTLY what you are doing.

Right. And I, as with many MANY other people, can’t properly pay attention to the great Sacrifice of the Mass in a stuffy suit. My personal comfort allows me to better see and comprehend what is truly happening. And when I am feeling low and unworthy, as I have so often recently due to all sorts of **** going on in my life, going to mass in ragged clothing feels reflective of my shame - like I am saying that I am not pure and clean and not worthy of appearing so before God. It’s almost like the modern day equivalent of pouring ash on my head and wearing sackcloth to me and I feel 1000 times closer to God when I do it than when I put on a face and act like nothing is wrong.

Perhaps you don’t have that problem, and that’s fine for you. But other people are not the same as you and you cannot expect them to be.

Then have a little respect - for those who can’t afford better clothes, or whose faith is weak and doesn’t know any better, etc. For someone so demanding of respect, you sure don’t give out much yourself.

I addressed every one of your point. Every one.

You conveniently ignore them.

You then accuse me of lacking respect. Respect for whom? A lackadaisical manner of dress? Or the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass?

A reeking homeless person was brought to a past Easter Vigil. I have never complained of that. I thought, ‘God bless him and the people who brought him.’

It appears to me that you have a certain picture in your mind and nothing can jar it loose. Fair enough. You think what you think.

But I agree with Apryl’s take on the matter.

 

[adstrinity]

First of all, it’s “Mass”, with a capital “m”.

Second, how does one concentrate at work in a suit and tie. One would think one couldn’t get anything done the way one goes on about it (this is for any who make this argument).

Suit and tie are distracting. GET OVER IT!!! It’s not about you!!! Wear the suit and tie and the shoes that pinch as pennance and when Calvary is depicted at the altar, offer that up for God.

Sheesh! The lengths some people will go to to appease themselves and become complacent.

And ANOTHER thing!! Just because people don’t know these things are wrong, DOES NOT MAKE THEM OKAY. Ignorance is no excuse. It’s a differential between a mortal and venial sin, but, it’s still not okay.

Also, JESUS NEVER EVER EVER EVER wore flip-flops. The sandals He wore were tied up.

Flip flops are not appropriate in a church. I understand if that’s what you are wearing, I may be guilty of wearing some in a church in the future, but, it doesn’t make it appropriate. Not in America.

 

[rinnie]

Maybe I’m just dense.

I don’t think that I am.

But I don’t see really where you stated that you couldn’t have put on something other than your ‘biker gear’. I mean, sure, you were on your way to a bike race. Does that trump the reverence and solemnity of the church and the sacredness of taking part in the Eucharist?

I don’t see how this person approaching you was some signal that what you were wearing became appropriate. I’m sure that visitors may not be aware of what is expected. But shouldn’t the family know better?

As a person who has spent many a Sunday going from one church to another, with bake sales and presentations and meetings and family events and plane rides all on the other side, I can’t see why your husband couldn’t have put a pair of real pants on over his biking shorts, or you couldn’t have put on a skirt or a jumper. Heck, I don’t wear pants to Mass, but you could have put on a pair of pants over your shorts, too.

Right?

I also think we all make mistakes Oops. Did I do that? Just because you did wear it, how do you think that makes it right?

You grew up in the church. Shouldn’t you be an example to those who are coming in? Shouldn’t you be an aid to those who come to church to find that sanctuary of piety? Rather than bringing in the secular world and events?

Don’t get me wrong: I’m not saying that you are a bad person or that you should have been prevented from taking part in the Eucharist. I am glad that you and your husband thought enough of making it to Mass, when others may have said, ‘I don’t have time’. Thank you for at least doing that. But I do have a problem with the idea of someone thinking, ‘hey, I wore my bike shorts, and it was kewl. Nothing happened. The walls didn’t fall in. You do it, too!’

Please, I hope you are not encouraging such items.

I see your story, but I don’t see your point.

Huh? I am also at a loss. He wore a pair of Jeans and a leather vest!

By the way if he is being disrepectful my Brother is really in trouble.

He got brain cancer and always had long hair. When he got brain cancer he lost alot of his hair. So when he went to Church he sat way in the back because he was embarrased and wore a bandana on his head. Yep did it until the day God took him out of this world 9 months later.

Rode his bike to Church on every Sunday also. Funny no one saw it as disrespect, they saw it as his Love for God. My Family saw it the same way also. It must be us.

When I lost him at the age of 39 I learned alot from him. And so did others. When he died many bikers came to the CC. Many were not Catholic. But came in, bowed to our Lord and got on thier knees and prayed to God. For many it was their first time ever in CHurch. For some it was not their last though. For many they fell away from the Church but now have come back.

Especially when we have masses for him. BIker gear and all. We do not see this as disrespect for our Lord, we see this as love for God and one another.

 

[Farsight001]

I addressed every one of your point. Every one.

Like hell you did. Where is the response to the reasons for wearing those clothes? You mentioned homelessness, but there is no response whatsoever to my other three examples. Then you raised a point in response to what I don’t know - but not something I ever said. Then you went on to say a bit more, ignoring my suggestion that you try to come up with some reasons for your own.

You then accuse me of lacking respect. Respect for whom? A lackadaisical manner of dress? Or the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass?

A lack of respect for those wearing raggedy clothes, which you do again by calling it “lackadaisical manner of dress”. How does it not possibly occur to you that it is in no way lackidasical? I came up with four reasons one might wear clothing like that, and none of it was out of laziness. Then I explained why I might wear clothes like that in another post and there was most certainly nothing lazy going on there. Your lack of respect is in your judgment upon others - that if you personally cannot think of a good reason for their dress, then it must have been disrespectful/ out of laziness. There are hundreds of possible reasons for their dress. Instead of snap judging them, ASK them.

What if their house just burned down and the raggedly clothes happened to be in the trunk of their BMW at the time? What if their bedroom was in the basement, and it just flooded? what if they are locked out of their house? What if their apartment is being fumigated? What if they really are dirt poor and the car they’re driving is one the guy across the hall lets them borrow because they don’t have one of their own to get to church? What if they haven’t been for years, and just felt a calling to get to church as fast as they can? What if they’re not Catholic and just felt a drawing to enter the church and don’t know any better?

A reeking homeless person was brought to a past Easter Vigil. I have never complained of that. I thought, ‘God bless him and the people who brought him.’

Great. Now show that love and charity for a person who is “spiritually” homeless.

It appears to me that you have a certain picture in your mind and nothing can jar it loose. Fair enough. You think what you think.

A strange thing to say considering I have already expressed that there is nothing wrong with wearing nice clothing. I am of the take that it is ok either way. You are of the mentality that it is your way or the highway. You really think that I’m the one with a picture in my mind that nothing can jar loose? Because I thought that about you after your first response to me.

 

[JHow]

…I work in a mental health facility. I learned very quickly that something as simple as having my hands in my pocket when talking to a patient is enough of a difference to set them off - for them to attack me, or decide not to take to heart what I say.

Wait! You can’t leave this hanging. Do you keep your hands in your pocket or out? Which sets people off?

 

[Farsight001]

First of all, it’s “Mass”, with a capital “m”.

Second, how does one concentrate at work in a suit and tie. One would think one couldn’t get anything done the way one goes on about it (this is for any who make this argument).

Suit and tie are distracting. GET OVER IT!!! It’s not about you!!! Wear the suit and tie and the shoes that pinch as pennance and when Calvary is depicted at the altar, offer that up for God.

Can’t offer it up to God if I can’t even pay attention to God. Like I said to someone else in previous post - it may not be a problem for you, but you are not everybody. Other people struggle with this, myself included. Do you want me to know what’s going on? Or do you want me to be so distracted that I don’t even know when the homily has begun?

Sheesh! The lengths some people will go to to appease themselves and become complacent.

That is nearing the most offensive thing someone has ever said to me. You really think I do it to appease myself?

And ANOTHER thing!! Just because people don’t know these things are wrong, DOES NOT MAKE THEM OKAY. Ignorance is no excuse. It’s a differential between a mortal and venial sin, but, it’s still not okay.

Ignorance is no excuse. That is right. Which is why you correct a person with charity and love, not create online lists of people you don’t like.

And ignorance is no excuse - you are right. And you should keep that in mind next time you see someone in flip flops and shorts and you don’t know why. You are ignorant of their circumstances, and like you said, ignorance is no excuse. When you stand before God and he asks you why you said or did what you did and caused them(hypothetical person of course) never to return to church again, and you say you didn’t know any better, what do you think God is going to say? “Ignorance is no excuse.”

 

[rinnie]

It shows a lack of respect.

If you wouldn’t dress like that to a job interview or to a restaurant, why would you dress like that for Mass?

How do you dress to go to a restaurant? Wearing a nice pair of Jeans, black boots, and a Leather Jacket or vest is how I do it??

My hair was nice, I had on nice clothes, I was clean. Want a bigger shock! Here it comes. The CHurch I go to now my Husband and I always take the bike. Its a smaller one then what I used to go. And a bigger shock if he does not have the bike they ALL ask Where is the bike!!

ANd now here this will REALLY BLOW you SOCKS OFF.

He is the one who is an usher and collect’s the money. He is the one who welcomes them to Church when they come in. He helps the older ladies to their seats and they love him. And if its summer they know the bike and vest will be worn.

Now guess what we are the ones who help the Priest. Father has my husband on speed dial. If he needs help we are the first he calls.

We go to meeting’s for the Church every month, we decorate the Church at Christmas. We help with anything that is asked of us.

It is the subject of Mass today as we speak.

Stop judging and you will not be judged!! Please do not say we have Lack of Respect. Our Love for our Lord is strong. We live to be the best we can be. We do all that we possibly can for the Church. We pray for God’s Grace everyday so we can receive more to do his work.

And when People walk in we treat them all with respect and Love and Say welcome to our Church! Have a good day.

 

[Farsight001]

Wait! You can’t leave this hanging. Do you keep your hands in your pocket or out? Which sets people off?

A bit off topic I guess, but if you really must know, keeping your hands in your pocket makes it less likely for a person to take what you have to say seriously. Folding arms across your chest makes an attack more likely. Though it varies from patient to patient of course. You’ve got to pay attention to their expressions, speech, tone, and hand gestures too. That’s what tells you how to respond properly.

 

[Todd520]

Can’t offer it up to God if I can’t even pay attention to God. Like I said to someone else in previous post - it may not be a problem for you, but you are not everybody. Other people struggle with this, myself included. Do you want me to know what’s going on? Or do you want me to be so distracted that I don’t even know when the homily has begun?

Since proper fitting clothes are not a distraction, I think you are saying it’s too much trouble to buy second hand or new clothing that actually fits?
I think you are saying you don’t think it’s important to physically show reverence in Mass?

And ignorance is no excuse - you are right. And you should keep that in mind next time you see someone in flip flops and shorts and you don’t know why. You are ignorant of their circumstances, and like you said, ignorance is no excuse. When you stand before God and he asks you why you said or did what you did and caused them(hypothetical person of course) never to return to church again, and you say you didn’t know any better, what do you think God is going to say? “Ignorance is no excuse.”

If regular Mass goers dressed for church, it is still easy to show charity to newbies, and the new members would clearly see the appropriate standard of dress.

 

[Sailor_Kenshin]

Like hell you did. Where is the response to the reasons for wearing those clothes? You mentioned homelessness, but there is no response whatsoever to my other three examples. Then you raised a point in response to what I don’t know - but not something I ever said. Then you went on to say a bit more, ignoring my suggestion that you try to come up with some reasons for your own.

A lack of respect for those wearing raggedy clothes, which you do again by calling it “lackadaisical manner of dress”. How does it not possibly occur to you that it is in no way lackidasical? I came up with four reasons one might wear clothing like that, and none of it was out of laziness. Then I explained why I might wear clothes like that in another post and there was most certainly nothing lazy going on there. Your lack of respect is in your judgment upon others - that if you personally cannot think of a good reason for their dress, then it must have been disrespectful/ out of laziness. There are hundreds of possible reasons for their dress. Instead of snap judging them, ASK them.

What if their house just burned down and the raggedly clothes happened to be in the trunk of their BMW at the time? What if their bedroom was in the basement, and it just flooded? what if they are locked out of their house? What if their apartment is being fumigated? What if they really are dirt poor and the car they’re driving is one the guy across the hall lets them borrow because they don’t have one of their own to get to church? What if they haven’t been for years, and just felt a calling to get to church as fast as they can? What if they’re not Catholic and just felt a drawing to enter the church and don’t know any better?

Great. Now show that love and charity for a person who is “spiritually” homeless.

A strange thing to say considering I have already expressed that there is nothing wrong with wearing nice clothing. I am of the take that it is ok either way. You are of the mentality that it is your way or the highway. You really think that I’m the one with a picture in my mind that nothing can jar loose? Because I thought that about you after your first response to me.

I thought we weren’t supposed to be ‘judgmental.’

Why do you believe it’s okay to show disrespect toward the Holy Sacrifice of Mass?

Maybe you need to go back and read my post. I refer to actual people seen every week, people who dress better to shop for groceries than they do to attend Mass—and not the hypothetical situations you keep tossing at me.

 

[Farsight001]

Since proper fitting clothes are not a distraction, I think you are saying it’s too much trouble to buy second hand or new clothing that actually fits?

Hardly. I have properly fitting clothes. They are still a distraction. I will say a third time - you may not have a problem with it, and that’s fine, but others do.

I think you are saying you don’t think it’s important to physically show reverence in Mass?

No. I am saying that it is more important to show real internal reverence than to appear reverent outwardly. I am also saying that it is completely counterproductive for some of the posters here to have such an obviously negative opinion of those who don’t dress as nicely.

What do we say when anti-Catholics accuse us of worshiping statues? That worship is internal. It comes from the heart - from inside. That they should not judge us by outward appearances or actions. And yet right here, that is exactly what so many Catholics are doing to their own fellow Church-goers. And doing that turns people off from the faith. It almost makes me not want to go to church because I don’t want to be anywhere near people with such an attitude. Lucky me my church isn’t in the practice of judging others by appearance alone.

If regular Mass goers dressed for church, it is still easy to show charity to newbies, and the new members would clearly see the appropriate standard of dress.

Dressing nice for mass is fine, as is showing charity to newbies, or those not dressed nice. But I do not see that charity when someone makes a list that is mostly blatant negative judgment of people not like them for no real better reason than they are not like them. I thought mocking people for being different was a grade school thing, and yet here we are, with full grown adults, doing it too.

 

[Farsight001]

I thought we weren’t supposed to be ‘judgmental.’

You’re right. We’re not. So why are you?

Why do you believe it’s okay to show disrespect toward the Holy Sacrifice of Mass?

I don’t believe it’s ok. How ridiculous for you to say such a thing. I also don’t think it is necessarily disrespectful. It certainly can be, but it depends on a person’s circumstances. And since you don’t know a person’s circumstances unless you ask, which you obviously don’t, you are, de facto, judging them based solely on appearance. It’s superficial and vain.

Maybe you need to go back and read my post. I refer to actual people seen every week, people who dress better to shop for groceries than they do to attend Mass—and not the hypothetical situations you keep tossing at me.

They aren’t hypothetical. I’ve drawn entirely on people I’ve met or heard about, and one circumstance I was in myself. And there are people out there right now in those very circumstances. What I’m trying to get through to you is that one of those people you are criticizing for not dressing to your personal standards may very well be a person in that situation. And when you speak down to them and criticize them for wearing what, unbeknownst to you because you don’t care to ask, is the best they have right now, you make a person feel worthless or ******.

And when you criticize a person of weak faith, they think it isn’t worth the effort if people are going to criticize you just for the clothes you wear. There is a time and a place for everything. And telling someone they’re not dressing properly for mass when their faith is STRONG is the right time, not when it is weak. When faith is strong, it can take the hit and they can ultimately come out stronger for it. When faith is weak, it can cause irreparable harm.

 

[mellowcalico]

Going back to the OP, I am on the list

1. Catholic parents who have no control over their young children during Mass
2. Catholics who never tithe because they believe it is not biblical
3. Catholics who talk during Mass
   13.Catholics who are clueless why the sanctuary lamp (candle) is there
4. Catholic parents who believe the church should adjust to their own needs and beliefs

On #6 I usually have control over my child, but once in a blue moon she’s in a “mood” and she will sulk, not participate in Mass, whine, etc. And there isn’t a whole lot I can do other than #11 (talk to her and constantly whisper to her to behave, let her know she’s stepping over the line, etc… I also talk to her when she starts behaving during these times to let her know she’s doing good and I am proud of her for improving her behavior–because it reinforces her good behavior). I also answer her questions about Mass during Mass otherwise she will forget the context.

On #10, I am poor financially right now due to a change in circumstances in my life. I give what I can, but it’s not much. Sometimes I have more money, other times less. I don’t think I can tithe. It’s all I can do to keep my budget in the black as it is with housing costs, rising energy costs, rising food costs, and being a single mom. I am also human and my Church is very well to do. The people who go there are affluent and it’s not uncommon to see beautiful flower arrangements, elaborate decorations, etc at my Church. Maybe it’s sinful, but I think to myself, “I am not giving the Church more money to buy more flowers when I am gluing my shoes together to make them last just a little longer.”

I’ll be honest, I didn’t know #13. I had to look it up. I went to CCD for years and a Catholic school… they never once taught us Catechism (although in 8th grade we were given pamphlets to read). I look things up and try to learn now, but if I don’t think to look into something, then I just don’t know.

#20 I do believe the Church should be a little more considerate of working parents. As it is now in my Church, I can’t belong to any women’s clubs because I can’t attend daytime meetings. This goes for the mom’s club too. Most of the CCD classes are offered during working hours too (right after school, I don’t get home until 5pm). Luckily, there is one late class and I was able to get my child in that one.

As for the debated topic of dress. I always figure, “Get the people in the Church first, then maybe worry about what they are wearing.” When it comes to worrying about what others are wearing in Church it seems to pale in comparison to the problem of people drifting away from the Church. It’s like a patient worrying about what her makeup looks like while doctors are trying to stop her from bleeding to death.

I sure hope no one is judging me by my jerry-rigged shoes or the fact that I wear the same dress every single Sunday. When winter comes, I will wear pants most likely since it’s what I have. That’s a whole other debate too it seems

 

[adstrinity]

Can’t offer it up to God if I can’t even pay attention to God. Like I said to someone else in previous post - it may not be a problem for you, but you are not everybody. Other people struggle with this, myself included. Do you want me to know what’s going on? Or do you want me to be so distracted that I don’t even know when the homily has begun?

Boo-hoo. Going to Mass IS all about you, isn’t it? We should all just do whatever we want as long as we are there on Obligatory days, shouldn’t we? After all, we’ve done what’s required of us, we shouldn’t go above and beyond. God will be happy we give Him our minimal.

Again, though, how do people stay focused at work in a monkey suit?

That is nearing the most offensive thing someone has ever said to me. You really think I do it to appease myself?

Yes, I know you do. I was once in your shoes regarding pride.

Ignorance is no excuse. That is right. Which is why you correct a person with charity and love, not create online lists of people you don’t like.

Point understood, but, this is an online forum. And it is a VERY justified list (though, it may not be in the correct folder).

And ignorance is no excuse - you are right. And you should keep that in mind next time you see someone in flip flops and shorts and you don’t know why. You are ignorant of their circumstances, and like you said, ignorance is no excuse. When you stand before God and he asks you why you said or did what you did and caused them(hypothetical person of course) never to return to church again, and you say you didn’t know any better, what do you think God is going to say? “Ignorance is no excuse.”

Flip-flops and shorts. No. That’s NEVER appropriate. Stop with that. It may be all they have, but, it’s not appropriate in a church in America.

I believe God does say he’ll spew out the luke-warm ones. It’s on them if they do not return to church. It is on them, also, to learn what is appropriate attire for Mass. Priests have addressed what people should wear to Mass, both from the pulpit and in the bulletin; both the FSSP Mass to which I go, and the OF Mass in my city…the former said one should be dressed up, the other said just cover up, but, still…

And also, the person who through in the brother arriving on a bike, that’s a non-sequetur and you know it. Blue jeans are not appropriate for Mass.

 

[Nicea325]

1. Catholic parents who have no control over their young children during Mass
2. Catholics who never tithe because they believe it is not biblical
3. Catholics who talk during Mass
   13.Catholics who are clueless why the sanctuary lamp (candle) is there
4. Catholic parents who believe the church should adjust to their own needs and beliefs

On #6 I usually have control over my child, but once in a blue moon she’s in a “mood” and she will sulk, not participate in Mass, whine, etc. And there isn’t a whole lot I can do other than #11 (talk to her and constantly whisper to her to behave, let her know she’s stepping over the line, etc… I also talk to her when she starts behaving during these times to let her know she’s doing good and I am proud of her for improving her behavior–because it reinforces her good behavior). I also answer her questions about Mass during Mass otherwise she will forget the context.

Well I was very general with #6,but I do understand kids. What I was referring to actually is an issue where some parents allow their child to wander about during the Mass.

On #10, I am poor financially right now due to a change in circumstances in my life. I give what I can, but it’s not much. Sometimes I have more money, other times less. I don’t think I can tithe. It’s all I can do to keep my budget in the black as it is with housing costs, rising energy costs, rising food costs, and being a single mom. I am also human and my Church is very well to do. The people who go there are affluent and it’s not uncommon to see beautiful flower arrangements, elaborate decorations, etc at my Church. Maybe it’s sinful, but I think to myself, “I am not giving the Church more money to buy more flowers when I am gluing my shoes together to make them last just a little longer.”

Understandable. As Catholics we are to give what we can afford and you do that already.

I’ll be honest, I didn’t know #13. I had to look it up. I went to CCD for years and a Catholic school… they never once taught us Catechism (although in 8th grade we were given pamphlets to read). I look things up and try to learn now, but if I don’t think to look into something, then I just don’t know.

Not surprising or new,but I do not mean it as an insult. The Church is to blame as well for not educating Catholics what it means.

#20 I do believe the Church should be a little more considerate of working parents. As it is now in my Church, I can’t belong to any women’s clubs because I can’t attend daytime meetings. This goes for the mom’s club too. Most of the CCD classes are offered during working hours too (right after school, I don’t get home until 5pm). Luckily, there is one late class and I was able to get my child in that one.

Oh trust me, I am very considerate of working parents. I know most parents work,but that is not what I am referring to with #20. The issue has to do more with catechism and the process being that I am a Director of Catechesis. So many Catholic parents want the church to do it as speedy as possible or the church to adjust to their false perceptions of what they think it is doctrine. The church is not Burger King: You can have it your way. So many are some sort of rush,but I have yet to meet a parent rushing the school principal in order for the child to finish quickly and painless as possible.

As for the debated topic of dress. I always figure, “Get the people in the Church first, then maybe worry about what they are wearing.” When it comes to worrying about what others are wearing in Church it seems to pale in comparison to the problem of people drifting away from the Church. It’s like a patient worrying about what her makeup looks like while doctors are trying to stop her from bleeding to death.

Well that is one of the problems why people leave, cannot tell them anything without getting all offended and it shows here on this thread. The problem always stems with attitude and today’s attitude is so attached to one’s ego and selfishness.

I sure hope no one is judging me by my jerry-rigged shoes or the fact that I wear the same dress every single Sunday. When winter comes, I will wear pants most likely since it’s what I have. That’s a whole other debate too it seems

Not at all. All I am saying is people should dress decent and respectable. Sorry,but women who expose their breast or wear super tight clothes need to know where they are going…church, not a club,dance or bar.