What mishaps have you seen in church?

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On the other hand, I did teach one of the other priests there about lectionaries on cell phones. He finally asked me because I was attending daily mass, and basically said no one bothers to show up to daily mass so they can sit on their cell phone.
 
I was glad for my cell phone yesterday at the Palm Sunday Mass with the long gospel. Having to stand up for 15 minutes in an overcrowded, overheated pew was much easier when holding a little smartphone than a big, heavy missal book.
 
These are too funny, oh my goodness. 😂 Also #7 lady sounds like an awesome person.
 
There have been multiple times that birds have come into the church. It is funny to see how people’s attention inevitably turns to the bird flying around. I remember one time it rested on top of the statue of the Holy Spirit in the form of a dove.
 
DarkLight said:
We were supposed to do the blessing of the palms outside. The holy water froze.
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Many/all of the Slavonic churches add hot water to the Blood after the Anaphora (consecration). It is for the fervor and warmth of our prayers.

If you go to the origins, it originated in drafty and unheated churches in the northern Russian winters, where the wine was likely to freeze . . .

(And, no, I couldn’t tell you how the Melkites picked up the practice)

hawk
 
Easter vigil tonight.
After all readings and responsorials (none skipped, so we are about 70 minutes in), my daughter fell asleep kneeling.

Her head eventually slid off her arms and hit the pew with a loud thud.
At which point my sister completely lost it and started turning blue trying to suppress laughter.
Then the ladies in front of us started to get the giggles…which was especially bad given that they had to get up for their baptism a few minutes later.

It was not the train wreck I have seen laughter do to a Mass before, but this one will be a memory for a while.
 
That reminds me of when I was in high school, my family was in the front row. My sister put the kneeler down on my toe and my mom got on the kneeler, so my foot is pinned. I’m whispering during the benediction “my foot!” They didn’t get it, they are shaking their heads for me to be quiet!
I point down and whisper louder, “my foot!” They start looking around and my foot is really hurting now and it’s stuck under the weight! Finally I practically am talking out loud, “ the kneeler is on my foot!!” They realize they have pinned me there, jump up off the kneeler and it clunks down with my foot out of the way. We all start suppressing our giggles but it comes out as snorts. To this day, we have trouble when we are all together putting the kneeler down without laughing.
 
otrrl said:
#8. infant baptism during Sunday Mass. The script called for the baptism in a special garment – OK – but thence the mother disappeared into the sacristy to dress up the baby and left the priest “hanging” out there for about 8 minutes until things were “just so.” until he could conclude the rites.
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For many years we had the parents dress the babies in regular clothes and dress them in their baptismal clothing after the “Presentation of the White Garment”. We just had tables to the side of the sanctuary and they dressed babies there while we sang a baptismal hymn until they stepped back into the sanctuary for the “Presentation of the LIght” and the “Ephpheta Rite”. Usually took 4-6 verses.
 
My personal humiliation came while I was reading Isaiah 11 at a packed Mass. I read 11:1 as

“A shoot shall come out from the rump of Jesse,
and a branch shall grow out of his roots.”

As I realized what I’d said I inwardly groaned but nobody seemed to notice so rather than correct and draw attention to it, I simply kept reading. Later, during the Consecration of course, a visual of what I had read flashed through my mind and I struggled mightily not to roar with laughter.
 
otrrl said:
I moved away from my home town for more than ten years. In my absence, I heard that the pastor of my native parish would bring his dog in church during Mass.
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When I first came to this parish the Pastor had a beautiful Samoyed he’d named “Skipper”. The rectory was attached to the church and Skip had free rein to wander around. He usually stayed close to Fr. Jack, except during Mass when he’d be shut out of the church by the sacristy door.

Skip was terrified of thunder. One Saturday evening during Mass the weather changed and thunder boomed. A few minutes later I could hear Skip at the sacristy door, whining and scratching. I’d seen the damage he could inflict to door moldings when he was doing that so I quickly went to let him in. He immediately went to Fr. Jack and after pressing himself to him and reassuring himself that all was well, he went to lie down in front of the Tabernacle where he remained until the recessional when he walked down the aisle with his master.
 
I just finished RCIA (baptized & confirmed yesterday!) :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes: and on Holy Thursday myself and the people from my class had our feet washed. I am on the petite side and my feet didn’t quite reach the bowl hanging over the chair I was sitting on, and when Father leaned down to kiss my foot he started falling and had to catch himself on the leg of the chair. I felt so terrible!
 
Oh, AND, last night, just as I was preparing to be baptized, Father stepped into the font and made a HORRIFIED face. I went to step in and he said “No, no! Don’t come in here yet wait!” It turns out they’d accidentally set the temperature of the water too high. He frantically called for the sacristan to fix it by adding some cold water, but all the did was raise the water level close to overflowing. I was baptized in a hot tub. Felt exactly like the ones at the hotels. No joke. 🙂
 
One Easter Sunday, Mass was over and the announcements had been made. One of our parishioners had brought his one yr old to the front for a blessing from Father. Father blessed the little one and then said to her, smiling, “Have a Merry Christmas.”

Then realizing what he’d said, he blushed and corrected himself. "I mean, “Happy Easter. Oh dear! I hope I haven’t given her a complex and that she knows it’s Easter and not Christmas. She’ll be expecting us to give her presents.”

We all laughed and assured him she’d be okay with whatever holiday he wished to give her.:hugs:
 
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