What to tell my family. (Troubled by lust)

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I wasn’t able to go to confession once with big issues on my concious. I didnt want a big fight with family so I made sure to get in line last and simply cross my arms and get a blessing instead of receiving. Not sure if that is the best method or even ok but it stopped an argument and I felt it was the right path.
That actually sounds like a really clever compromise :tiphat:
 
Well if you hadd you would have found out what the world record for speed-banning from a forum really is 😉
 
Thank you for your prayers and advice.

With the regards to the “mortal or venial” debate I have very few doubts about masturbation being almost always a mortal sin. Certainly from my own experience even though force of habit is very powerful and has certainly weakened my will on this issue, I still had a choice, last time for example there was a clear moment when God was providing me with a way out. Sadly I turned away from Him.

My biggest problem at the moment is that even though I am not in state of mortal sin I still feel as if I shouldn’t receive Communion for a few weeks. As I said in my initial post this feeling started when, after having remained in the pew at Communion due to mortal sin a few weeks ago and feeling that I had done the right thing and was back on the right road following Christ, I masturbated later that day. Ever since then I have felt that just going to Confession wasn’t enough. I just don’t know if this is me beating myself up too much or God prompting me to take time to reflect on the miracle that is the Eucharist.

When I am at Mass tonight I think I shall just ask for a blessing (it’s going to be a big Mass with several priests so that should be quite feasible). Unfortunately at Sunday Mass it’s a 50-50 chance of it being the priest or an extarordinary minister distributing Communion to the side of the church I sit at so really the only option is to remain in my seat. Certainly your comments have been very helpful and I think will give me courage if in the future I find myself in a state of mortal sin.

I just wish I knew why I have this foreboding about receiving Communion and whether or not it is just me or if it is God speaking to me (I am terrible for second guessing things like this). I have mentioned this to a priest and he said that “his reflection on it” would be to receive. Having said that I’m not sure if I made myself completely clear and he did say to receive even if I fell again between the confession and the next time I was at Mass, which worries me since I feel that masturbation is without doubt a mortal sin. I did receive the next Sunday , whiel I was still in a state of grace, but I still have all these doubts about whether or not I was doing what God wanted.

I just wish I could get past this and back to my main struggle of fighting lust with Christ at my side. Currently I feel very far from Him.
 
God love you Andrew, you are obviously a very devout and sincere young man.

I remember a documentary about some non-Catholics who went to live with a group of Benedictine Monks. They were working in the garden together and talking around this somewhat awkward subject and one of the guys said to his monastic mentor “What happens when you feel a bit randy, do you bash the bishop?” and the monk said very calmy “OH no, one would hope that one would leave the bishop alone!”
It was handled so naturally and so humanly. It makes you think that everyone struggles with this problem to some extent.

I think you are focusing on this issue a little too much. I would concentrate on the good stuff you do. Try and keep busy and live your life with God. When you feel “dodgy” imagine Jesus there with you and explain how you are feeling to him. What would he say? How would he respond?
Most of all, remember that God loves you no matter what. I will remember you in my prayers my brother. Take care!
 
My biggest problem at the moment is that even though I am not in state of mortal sin I still feel as if I shouldn’t receive Communion for a few weeks.
YIKES! Puh-leeze my dear little brother! Do not deprive yourself of the most precious gift our Lord is offering your penitent and contrite heart. He knows your struggles. Let him in!
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Andrew98:
Ever since then I have felt that just going to Confession wasn’t enough. I just don’t know if this is me beating myself up too much or God prompting me to take time to reflect on the miracle that is the Eucharist.
You are right. Confession is NOT enough. Contrition validates the confession. Anybody reading this thread would guess that you qualify. Trust in Our Lord’s mercy to deliver on his promises. His mercy is bigger than your sin and bigger than your fear. If you have done all you can to turn from your sin and intend to continue on this path, Our Lord will not let you down.
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Andrew98:
I just wish I knew why I have this foreboding about receiving Communion and whether or not it is just me or if it is God speaking to me (I am terrible for second guessing things like this). I have mentioned this to a priest and he said that “his reflection on it” would be to receive. Having said that I’m not sure if I made myself completely clear and he did say to receive even if I fell again between the confession and the next time I was at Mass, which worries me since I feel that masturbation is without doubt a mortal sin. I did receive the next Sunday , whiel I was still in a state of grace, but I still have all these doubts about whether or not I was doing what God wanted.
Sigh. I know a priest who says that he thinks the drop in the number of people coming to Confession is because the Holy Spirit himself is keeping people away from bad advice given by badly informed priests. Shucks. You are absolutely right. You are doing what needs to be done to struggle with this VERY difficult sin. This priest probably gave you that advice because he does not want you to become scrupulous. His intentions were good but stick to your guns on this. DO receive Communion if you are in a state of grace. As you receive, pray, “Lord, I trust not in my own righteousness but in your merciful blood.”
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Andrew98:
I just wish I could get past this and back to my main struggle of fighting lust with Christ at my side. Currently I feel very far from Him.
Sometimes (I’m old; I know stuff) you will find that when you feel furthest from Christ, you are closest. Remember Peter? The minute he realized WHO Jesus was, he said: “Depart from me, Lord; I am a sinful man.”
 
IF you are not in the state if mortal sin, by all means DO go to Communion. You need all the graces you can get and receiving Communion gets that for you.

Part of the solution to sin is to focus on Christ and not on your sins. When you are already reconciled to God through confession, do not distance yourself by avoiding Communion.
 
Currently I feel very far from Him.
Andrew, you may feel far from Him, but He is very close to you.

You are a great credit to your family. I will say a prayer for you.

And as others have said, receive communion when you are in a state of grace. If you feel the need for more contemplation about the Blessed Sacrament, then go to adoration in addition to receiving communion.

Don’t worry about the possibility of falling again after you receive communion. It’s the grace from the Eucharist that you need to help resist the temptation that will come your way.

You’re doing a great job. Keep at it.
 
With regard to your family and your frequent confession you night say you are trying to grow in virtue and holiness and being closer to God. Frequent reception of the Sacraments is the best thing for these.
 
"My biggest problem at the moment is that even though I am not in state of mortal sin I still feel as if I shouldn’t receive Communion for a few weeks. "

This is one of Satan’s classic tricks; please don’t fall for it but instead go to confession and receive communion as often as possible.
 
Again thank you all, especially mercygate, your words have been really helpful. I have now received Communion several times and am feeling a bit like I am back on the right path. I still have this nagging worry at the back of my mind though.
This is one of Satan’s classic tricks; please don’t fall for it but instead go to confession and receive communion as often as possible.
From the way you worded that I get the impression you have experienced this. If you don’t mind me asking, have you?
 
Again thank you all, especially mercygate, your words have been really helpful. I have now received Communion several times and am feeling a bit like I am back on the right path. I still have this nagging worry at the back of my mind though.

From the way you worded that I get the impression you have experienced this. If you don’t mind me asking, have you?
Thank you, Andrew. Your words are a great consolation to this old grey head. High five to you!
 
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