In the beginning, God himself made mention of His favorite car, when He described to Jeremiah His plans for the Israelites. Jer 32:37 Behold, I will gather them out of all countries, whither I have driven them in my Anger, and in my Fury, and in great wrath; and I will bring them again unto this place, and I will cause them to dwell safely .Clearly, God was driving, not a bus, but a Plymouth Fury and a car called an “Anger”, which is no longer being produced. Later, however, the Lord was seen driving people around in a Valiant:
Jer 46:15 Why are thy Valiant men swept away? they stood not, because the LORD did drive them. The Lord frequently drove people out to important occasions, if they didn’t have their own car:
Judg 1:19 And the LORD was with Judah; and he drove out the inhabitants of the mountain; but could not drive out the inhabitants of the valley, because they had chariots of iron.
Station wagons were also popular in early times. God saw that they were good, as they could not only carry an assembly of people, but would shield them in a crash.
Ezek 23:24 And they shall come against thee with chariots, wagons, and wheels, and with an assembly of people, which shall set against thee buckler and shield and helmet round about: and I will set judgment before them, and they shall judge thee according to their judgments.Unfortunately, his followers, being generous in the ways of the Lord, tended to give them away:
Num 7:6 And Moses took the wagons and the oxen, and gave them unto the Levites.
Fords, then as now, were popular, but not universally so, often being left behind in emergencies.
Gen 32:22 And he rose up that night, and took his two wives, and his two womenservants, and his eleven sons, and passed over the Ford Jabbok.
Ford dealerships were commonly used as gathering points for women.
Isa 16:2 For it shall be, that, as a wandering bird cast out of the nest, so the daughters of Moab shall be at the Fords of Arnon.
Of course, God, with an infinite expense account, could afford to occasionally drive a Rolls Royce. Ezra 6:1 Then Darius the king made a decree, and search was made in the house of the Rolls, where the treasures were laid up in Babylon.
Dodge is one of the oldest car companies, selling the Triumph, Avenger, Colt, and Charger in Biblical times. 2Sam 1:20 Tell it not in Gath, publish it not in the streets of Askelon; lest the daughters of the Philistines rejoice, lest the daughters of the uncircumcised Triumph. Of course, in modern times, circumcision is no longer performed on automobiles.
They were popular gifts.
Mark 6:28 And brought his head in a Charger, and gave it to the damsel: and the damsel gave it to her mother.
The Dodge Ram was greatly admired, and frequently customized with aftermarket accessories such as custom leather seats and extra horns of different pitch.
Dan 8:3 Then I lifted up mine eyes, and saw, and, behold, there stood before the river a Ram which had two horns: and the two horns were high; but one was higher than the other, and the higher came up last.
Collisions, however, were frequent.
Dan 8:6 And he came to the Ram that had two horns, which I had there seen standing before the river, and ran unto him in the Fury of his power.
Here we see one of the earliest documented cases of road rage.
Dan 8:7 And I saw him come close unto the Ram, and he was moved with choler against him, and smote the Ram, and broke his two horns: and there was no power in the Ram to stand before him, but he cast him down to the ground, and stamped upon him: and there was none that could deliver the Ram out of his hand.
There are also very few Japanese cars in the Bible. The Honda Accord is mentioned several times, although one might question the driving skills of the ancient Israelites.
Acts 5:12 And by the hands of the apostles were many signs and wonders wrought among the people; and they were all with one Accord in Solomon’s porch.
Joking aside - Pope Francis is right… again.
