What's so great about homeschooling?

[DL82]

I am grateful for all of the perspectives & posts thus far-wow!
I continue to grapple w/the whole question of homeschooling, going from being very excited & sure to being scared & questioning my ability to do this well for one & for two-is it better for my kids?

I don’t look down on public school just b/c it is public school. I was public schooled & except for one shining moment in 4th grade, had no memorable academic achievements. I did excel in extra-curricular things, beginning in jr high & exploding in high school. I didn’t learn very much in terms of academics, although I learned tons as to how to win different types of things, like class elections, pep rallies, poster contests, public speaking events & the like. I was smart enough to not have to study & make fine grades w/o it. That I don’t consider myself exceptionally smart, that is one thing that concerns me about the public school curriculum. Granted, this was 20 yrs ago, but from what I see my 8th grader bringing home from public school, it doesn’t appear much has changed…
THERE ARE things I like about public school, one of them being there are lots of opprtunities for achieving & I feel pretty certain my kids would “win” stuff too-they’re smart, friendly and polite…
& I think this would give them a certain sense of accomplishment.
I really, really want my kids to learn & even in this great little private Catholic school here, I don’t feel my smart kids are being challenged academically. I don’t just want them to get good grades like I did & coast, I want them to learn…
I’m thinking the best way to do that is to homeschool & frankly, I’m a little sad at the good things they may miss out on in public or private school-maybe I just need to learn how to offer them those same types of opportunites & I’ve already learned a lot from the posts here…

One other thing I don’t like about my kids being away at school is the amount of what I perceive to be wasted/lost time…all is not wasted, I know, but from my own personal observation, much is. I would rather my kids be w/me, my husband or my parents, learning from us rather than chatting w/their friends-this is what my 9 yr old does when she finishes her work early-socializes-she (& our nearly 5 yr old son) were born knowing how to do this!!

Sorry for the lengthy post & thanks again for all the responses, good & bad!

If anyone has any experience in going to school or working while homeschooling, I’d love to hear it!
Renny

Remmy, from your original post and this last one (I admit I haven’t read the whole thread) it seems that you care deeply about all aspects of your children’s education.

The fact is, this is by far the most important factor, regardless of whether your children go to public, private or home education. One of the reasons Montessori methods work in private schools but turn into total chaos whenever they are tried in the public sector is that the children are already well prepared and imbued with a strong sense of the importance of learning by their parents.

At the same time, I’d be careful about talking about ‘wasted’ time. Learning isn’t just a process of constantly hearing and reading, but of taking things in and assimilating them to your personality. Learning is a social activity, and the time children have in school, provided the learning environment is well managed and conducive to the child’s development, which may seem to you to be ‘wasted’ is often key to their development as social individuals, able to use their learning to support others.

I wish you all the best with whatever you decide is best for the education of your children.

 

[maryjk]

At the same time, I’d be careful about talking about ‘wasted’ time. Learning isn’t just a process of constantly hearing and reading, but of taking things in and assimilating them to your personality. Learning is a social activity, and the time children have in school, provided the learning environment is well managed and conducive to the child’s development, which may seem to you to be ‘wasted’ is often key to their development as social individuals, able to use their learning to support others.

I wish you all the best with whatever you decide is best for the education of your children.

As a home schooling mom, I consider “wasted” time to be time where a child is simply sitting there waiting for something to happen.

Like: attendance, lining up to move down the hall and sitting still while the teacher has one on one with another child. I know when my son was in school, the other students just waiting until “little Johnny” got it. Let them read or do work while the teacher takes attendance or works one on one. That is wasted time.

“Wasted” time is not recess, lunch time or the like.

I wonder if I agree that learning is social activity. And I would love to see studies about this. I would also love to see, a “learning environment is well managed and conducive to the child’s development.” I know there are good schools out there, we just never happen to live near them.

 

[KCT]

One reason I like homeschooling is because I can take as much or as little time as needed on a concept.

If my child is struggling w/ division, I can let her keep working until she gets it. I can continue to give her practice until I feel she has it down. (or the reverse - if they get it, skip the 10 worksheets and move on!)

Our local public schools use pacing guides. The guide tells the teacher what to cover each day of the semester. If the kids fall behind or don’t understand it, too bad. The pacing guide rules and you keep moving. One concept may build on another, so if you don’t get it, you lose out all they way down the line.

I think math (especially) is too important to be taught that way.
—KCT

 

[PaulinVA]

I really am so ambivalent about this. Please bear with me.

The breaks in learning, the wasted time, waiting for Johnny to ‘get it’ - isn’t that like real life? The line at the DMV comes to mind.

Is it a problem for home schooled kids thinking that the world revolves around them? I’m serious about this, and I’m not being mean. No wasted time. Learning tailored exactly to them. Being able to learn about things that interest them (as opposed to something mandated).

 

[Renny]

Remmy, from your original post and this last one (I admit I haven’t read the whole thread) it seems that you care deeply about all aspects of your children’s education.

The fact is, this is by far the most important factor, regardless of whether your children go to public, private or home education. One of the reasons Montessori methods work in private schools but turn into total chaos whenever they are tried in the public sector is that the children are already well prepared and imbued with a strong sense of the importance of learning by their parents.

At the same time, I’d be careful about talking about ‘wasted’ time. Learning isn’t just a process of constantly hearing and reading, but of taking things in and assimilating them to your personality. Learning is a social activity, and the time children have in school, provided the learning environment is well managed and conducive to the child’s development, which may seem to you to be ‘wasted’ is often key to their development as social individuals, able to use their learning to support others.

I wish you all the best with whatever you decide is best for the education of your children.

Thanks, very much!

Yes, I absolutely agree that learning is a process w/social aspects…what I have seen w/our 9 & 13 yr old is LOTS of social time…partly, w/our 9 yr old, I really like that she is socializing w/for the most part, good Catholic kids who don’t look at her or judge her for her devotion to Mary, say…who particularly understand that as a normal part of life…I love the social aspect of her attending Mass first thing 4 days a week. The wasted time/too social aspect I’m thinking of is the, “Hey, is Brittany back in rehab this wk?” kind of stuff…

I guess it mainly boils down to my deep desire to really know my kids & know what’s going on w/them. I think this can be accomplished wherever they are educated, just maybe better in our home-also I really want them to learn, as I said earlier…
I am also willing to reconsider in a yr or 2 if all goes poorly.
Renny

 

[Renny]

I really am so ambivalent about this. Please bear with me.

The breaks in learning, the wasted time, waiting for Johnny to ‘get it’ - isn’t that like real life? The line at the DMV comes to mind.

Is it a problem for home schooled kids thinking that the world revolves around them? I’m serious about this, and I’m not being mean. No wasted time. Learning tailored exactly to them. Being able to learn about things that interest them (as opposed to something mandated).

Your post is really very interesting to me & I don’t think you’re being mean…what I have noticed w/my children is that they seem to think the world revolves around them now & that is one thing I want to change in them…here is an example…when my son does most anything in Pre-K, he gets candy or stickers or some reward & now he is genuinely disappointed when he does something & all I do is say, “Good job picking up your clothes or whatever…”
He’s thinking (I know b/c he tells me ) where’s my candy or sticker or…
Our daughter isn’t so much this way, she does know the world doesn’t revolve around her(maybe b/c she’s older?) but still, she is used to being rewarded for minimal effort on her part.

To sum it all up, there is a certain sense of entitlement they seem to possess-please don’t hear me blaming the school for this, I take full responsibility for my kids faults! I believe I/we will be better able to form them if I am w/them more & I feel this is particularly true w/our son…

In terms of learning something mandated, our kids will. I plan to purchase a curriculum-for starters anyway, because I need some guidance! & then, we will do other child-chosen stuff, like sewing w/our 9 yr old. I am really excited about being to get the mandated stuff done in time enough to also do the child-chosen stuff!

 

[Renny]

Earlier in this thread there was a post regarding the poster’s son & how his masculinity is handled in school & for the life of me I can’t find it now!!-but thanks for it! There does seem to be, in our school-a kind of de-masculinizing (ok, so perhaps not a real word…but I know you get the idea!)
of the boys in the early grades. Maybe it’s just more of a blurring of genders, I’m not sure. I am glad about being able to avoid that by homeschooling.

Also, Kurakyn, thanks for your lovely post! Obviously, homeschooling has worked for you!

On a little different note, my daughter seems relieved to be hsing, although I know she will miss her friends & her being relieved gives me hope!
Renny

 

[maryjk]

I really am so ambivalent about this. Please bear with me.

**The breaks in learning, the wasted time, waiting for Johnny to ‘get it’ - isn’t that like real life? The line at the DMV comes to mind. **

Is it a problem for home schooled kids thinking that the world revolves around them? I’m serious about this, and I’m not being mean. No wasted time. Learning tailored exactly to them. Being able to learn about things that interest them (as opposed to something mandated).

But it is real life. The line at DMV comes once every couple of years depending on where you live. And just because they don’t have to line up to go to lunch or ask permission to go to the bathroom doesn’t mean that they don’t know how to stand in line. Think of the grocery store or the book store or Six Flags or any where else they need to stand in line.

I would think that waiting for Johnny to to get it isn’t real life. How many employers are going to go over the same thing twenty times just to make sure you understand? Most tell you once, send an email and leave you to your work. The thing I worry about is if my son doesn’t get it, and I have to spend a week with division or area or whatever. I know that he won’t get that in the working world. There is a “no child left behind” policy, but there is no “no employee left behind.” You don’t get it, you are out and someone else is hired to take your place.

The question is, do we send our children to school for an education or so they can make friends? I want my son to have both, but an education comes first. He also has friends, so home schooling is working fine for us.

 

[gardenswithkids]

…Is it a problem for home schooled kids thinking that the world revolves around them? I’m serious about this, and I’m not being mean. No wasted time. Learning tailored exactly to them. Being able to learn about things that interest them (as opposed to something mandated).

It is a problem for virtually all children thinking the world revolves around them. It starts with babies who cry when they’re hungry, wet or otherwise uncomfortable. Hopefully children outgrow such thinking with the help of loving parents who take care of their needs but not every demand.

Few, if any, homeschooling parents revolve their family life entirely around the interests and demands of a single child. Just as school teachers often focus on the slower learners, homeschooling parents usually focus more on the younger children or children who are sick or struggling; typically the older and healthy children work more independently, and frequently take turns helping with the younger children too.

Most homeschoolers also rely on a curriculum or texts developed by others, selecting the programs that fit best with their combined interests and learning/teaching styles. That is one of the things I like best about homeschooling; selecting the texts, workbooks, and other formal learning material. Once books or programs are choosen, stuff is mandated by mom.

Just this morning, one of my children reached a point in his math book where the learning didn’t come easy. In this case, he’s doing relatively advanced math for his age, (math’s his strong point.) What I thought what he needed from me more than math help was to know that I would help him when he needed it. He usually works independently, but had we skipped the hard stuff he wouldn’t have gotten the attention that he needed. He already knows our homeschooling doesn’t revolve around him; our family life revolves around faith.

Another thing I like about homeschooling–the formal school work revolves around our family, rather than our family revolving around school. Paul, you wrote about how your wife helped out at school, staying involved and on top of the learning, etc. Well, that is very difficult to do with many children and often multiple schools for multiple grade levels. Homeschooling simplified our life, and by simplifying life the thought of additional children doesn’t scare me. I think that is one reason why many large families turn to homeschooling and why homeschooling families are probably larger than average. Large family, by design and neccesity, lessen the likelihood of children thinking the world revolves around them.

Paul, I assume you are participating in this thread because you want to learn more about homeschooling. You mentioned much earlier your wife considered homeschooling but decided against it because of temperaments. Dads have a lot of influence on homeschooling families, and few moms would home educate successfully without the support of their husbands. I encourage you to ask your questions about homeschooling with an open mind.

 

[KCT]

I really am so ambivalent about this. Please bear with me.

The breaks in learning, the wasted time, waiting for Johnny to ‘get it’ - isn’t that like real life? The line at the DMV comes to mind. .

Our kids wait for plenty of things. Doctor appointments, DMV lines, grocery check out – all those everyday, life things. Those experiences are not unique to school .

However, yes, I am willing to wait for them to “get it” before I move on in school. Their academic education is too important to let them fail.

I’m more than willing to let them make their own mistakes in other areas. Math, English etc? No, I hold them to higher standards than just letting them fail. To me it teaches perserverence. —KCT

 

[KCT]

I really am so ambivalent about this. Please bear with me.

The breaks in learning, the wasted time, waiting for Johnny to ‘get it’ - isn’t that like real life? The line at the DMV comes to mind.

Is it a problem for home schooled kids thinking that the world revolves around them? I’m serious about this, and I’m not being mean. No wasted time. Learning tailored exactly to them. Being able to learn about things that interest them (as opposed to something mandated).

Hi again!

I just thought I’d point out that I don’t think homeschooling is perfect any more than public or private schools are perfect.

I homeschooled our kids, I currently home teach for the county school system and recently applied to teach at a private school.

Folks just try to do what’s best for their families. There are positives and negatives to everything in life, and education is no exception. —KCT

 

[leonie]

Hi again!

I just thought I’d point out that I don’t think homeschooling is perfect any more than public or private schools are perfect.

—KCT

That’s true. You can’t have one thing without giving up another. It’s just the way life works.

One thing I don’t like about homeschooling is the constant mess in the house.

 

[Little_Mary]

I do not home school and do not plan to. My children are enrolled in a Catholic school right now.

My daughter is on a swim team - not affiliated with her school. It is a small team, but only two of the swimmers on the team go to a school - the rest of the team is home schooled! So, I am around home schooled children and their parents quite a bit.

That doesn’t make me an expert but I have concluded (so far) that it is not for everybody. In some cases, the parent might love it but the child hates it, or vice versa.

I know of two families where the children would do anything to get their parents to let them go to school rather than do it at home. They say they are bored, bored, bored. I think that is because in both cases, the parents are self employed and use the morning time to “get the lessons out of the way” so they can focus the afternoon on their business. I think that’s a difficult way to go about it. If you are going to homeschool, look at it as a full time job.

So, another conclusion I have made (so far) is that, if one is going to commit to home schooling, don’t look at it as an “easy way out”. I don’t see that it is. You are not only committing to providing your children with their education, but you are also obligated to cultivate their social life, and help them grow athletically. Not to mention field trips, etc., to keep things lively. To me, it seems this would take a minimum of 40 hours per week to accomplish!!

I was not home schooled, and I wouldn’t trade the good times I had at school for anything - football games, pep rallies, club meetings, year book signings, dances, etc.

If I ever chose to homeschool my children, I would try and incorporate all of the above into their lives, one way or another. I would not look upon it as a part time job, 8am-1pm or whatever.

Again, I am not an expert, nor am I against home schooling - the above are just my observations.

Just my two cents!

 

[Katholish]

I recently wrote an article that was published on the front page of Christendom College’s student journal examining the question of whether or not homeschooling is superior to the ideal Catholic school (since many choose homeschooling because their Catholic schools are in bad shapre, it seemed necessary to ask what if the school was good).

I am a college senior and not a parent, so you may take that under advisement, but I have worked for a Catholic homeschool curriculum provider for ten years, and was homeschooled myself.

Here is a copy of the article if anyone is interested.

katholish.blogspot.com/

 

[LeahInancsi]

WHAT’S SO GREAT ABOUT HOMESCHOOLING???

When was the last time you drove by a public high school when school was getting out? It scares me to death and I don’t have any children. :bigyikes:

 

[bear06]

I really am so ambivalent about this. Please bear with me.

The breaks in learning, the wasted time, waiting for Johnny to ‘get it’ - isn’t that like real life? The line at the DMV comes to mind.

Is it a problem for home schooled kids thinking that the world revolves around them? I’m serious about this, and I’m not being mean. No wasted time. Learning tailored exactly to them. Being able to learn about things that interest them (as opposed to something mandated).

Should school be like the line at the DMV?!

As far as the world revolving around homeschoolers…I have six kids. I guarantee nobody feels like the world revolves around them here. We’re a team

Learning should most certainly be tailored to the child learning and not some other child. Shouldn’t, even in schools, tailoring be done to help those that are learning at a different rate whether it be fast or slow?

This is their formation time. They’ll be plenty of time to have to wait on others or have others wait for you later in life. Was it Laura Burquist who pointed out that we build are ships in the harbor not on the open sea? We’re preparing our kids for “real life”. That doesn’t mean that they have to experience every aspect of it to be prepared for it. For example, my kids don’t have to go to rehab to be prepared to resist the temptation of drugs, alcohol, sex, etc.

 

[PaulinVA]

Well, I have certainly learned a lot from everyone.

I’ve also been thinking about my attitude toward home schooling, and realized that it actually is all about attitude.

We all get varying levels of education and enrichment from whatever we are doing - homeschooling, private Catholic school, or public school. They each have their ups and down, good things and bad things.

What gets me is the attitude that my choice (public school) isn’t as good as the the other choices. That’s how I started when I sorta hijacked this thread. Of course, there’s also that matter of my uncharitable attitude toward some home schoolers, too. Thank you all for letting me work through that.

 

[eliza3b]

To me, homeschooling always sounds like the last option for parents - the private/Catholic schools were too expensive, not orthodox enough, too far away, etc. the public schools were bad, the bus ride was too long, little Johnny was diagnosed with a learning disabililty, and therefore, we decided to homeschool. It seems like most parents kind of get dragged into it, not really making a clear decision to do it. But that’s ok, that’s what happened to us, when we pulled our children from a parochial school and enrolled them in public. We never thought we’d send our kids to the dreaded public school, but after experiencing some not so Christian charity at our Catholic school we decided to give it a try. And guess what? Most, if not all, of the stereotypes about public school turned out to be false. My kids didn’t start swearing and wearing revealing clothes. They didn’t become boy or girl crazy. They made nice friends who came from nice families. And anyone who’s been in a public school in the last few years knows that children are not chained to their desks for six hours. There is a lot of fluidity in a classroom. There are children working in small groups, there is one on one attention with a teacher and there are specials and enrichments. Not to mention physical education, music, art, foreign language, and class trips.

I realize that I am very fortunate to live in a wealthy area that takes its public schools very seriously. Our district continually scores in the 98% to 100% in the state exams. This is mostly due to the demographic of town. Just about every parent has a college degree.

I laugh at some of these responses about home schooled children. “There so polite!” “They don’t care about competition!” “They don’t care about Britney Spears!” "They help eachother out! " “They know how to talk to adults!” “They play with kids who aren’t their own age”! Seriously folks, do you realize how silly that all sounds? I’m around my own children, plus a score of neighborhood kids on a daily basis and I can tell you first hand that they are well mannered, thoughtful, helpful and can communicate with me quite nicely.

On a final note, I was raised in a traditional large Catholic family. For most of my childhood I felt like the “other”. We were not part of our local community, we attended a Catholic school in a very Protestant town. Yes, it was great to be surrounded by other Catholics during the school day. But that kind of isolation pretty much ends when you are finished school. Then you have to deal with all sorts of people, most of whom don’t give a hoot who Chesterton was. I really didn’t want to raise my children like that. Does it ever worry you that your homeschooled children will rebel against your lifestyle?

 

[st_lucy]

Well I sent my daughter to traditional school until she was in third grade. She is a very shy child and was very young for her grade. I noticed that she was falling behind in all of her subjects. I took her out of school for various reasons. At her school it was either learn it or don’t ( I am sure it was not that harsh ). She was too shy to speak up and the teachers either looked the other way or didn’t notice that she was falling very far behind. I have since brought her back up to speed and she is even ahead in few subjects. She is also very social now that she doesn’t have the worry of who will be her friend today.

Another reason I love hsing is because today when we were feeling a little burnt out we put on swim suits and ran threw the sprinklers at about the same time the other children were eating lunch.

 

[st_lucy]

Does it ever worry you that your homeschooled children will rebel against your lifestyle?

Sure it does as I am sure it worries any family whether they hs or not.