What's the craziest Anti-Catholic whopper you've ever heard?

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They are rather funny!

It is amazing to see how many people try to put the KJV as the only Bible out there, and it is always amazing to see how they do it. I would not be suprised to find some people that would accept these are actual scripture because it made their point seem valid. :eek:
 
I found this one in the July 22, 2010 edition of The Onion, an article “God Hinting at Retirement,” which features, of course, a fictional interview with the Creator of the Universe.

The article is the usual Onion silliness and concludes with the following paragraph, clearly written by a Catholic:

Maybe I’ll visit Europe," God said. “I’ve never been in the Vatican, and I’ve heard it’s supposed to be beautiful.”
 
I’ve come across some really far out stuff on youtube. Stuff saying the Jesuits rule the world…They are the leaders of the Masons. And that Pope JPII sold chemicals to the Nazi’s for their gas chambers or something…and was tied to the Nazi’s from it somehow.
And that the leader of the Jesuits is more powerful than the Pope and "picks’ the Pope.
And kills Pope’s who don’t listen to them…and presidents too.
And that the Jesuits rule the Cardinal of The New York Diocese and he rules the president…and the US.

Crazy stuff…anybody have a thread started on any of this stuff? Very interesting…
I didn’t like that some view our faith that way…but would be very interested in viewing any defense of the Church against all those really off the wall rumors…at least I would consider them off the wall rumors…
 
Hi, Human Being,

I am not sure there is a response to such pathological hatred that distorts reality to the extent you have stated. It reminds me of the person who is having active hallucinations about there being a pink elephant in the room wanting to kill them! You can really spend some time and effort assuring them and providing them with proof that there is no pink elephant here - but, it will do no good. At least for people with psychiatric disorders there is medication and health care professionals to care for them. For these people who write such hate-filled blogs, there is probably little hope.

Of course, they hate the Jesuits with cause - just look at the destructive impact they had on the idiocy of the so-called ‘reformation’. These guys even got the name wrong - they ‘reformed’ nothing, they changed the Faith given to us by Christ for man made traditions that do not lead to heaven. St. Ignatius’ work carries on. God bless the Jesuits.

God bless
human_being said:
I’ve come across some really far out stuff on youtube. Stuff saying the Jesuits rule the world…They are the leaders of the Masons. And that Pope JPII sold chemicals to the Nazi’s for their gas chambers or something…and was tied to the Nazi’s from it somehow.
And that the leader of the Jesuits is more powerful than the Pope and "picks’ the Pope.
And kills Pope’s who don’t listen to them…and presidents too.
And that the Jesuits rule the Cardinal of The New York Diocese and he rules the president…and the US.

Crazy stuff…anybody have a thread started on any of this stuff? Very interesting…
I didn’t like that some view our faith that way…but would be very interested in viewing any defense of the Church against all those really off the wall rumors…at least I would consider them off the wall rumors…
Click to expand...
 
So as far as I can tell, there are segments of society out there who believe Catholics to be a non-Christian sect who control a large portion of the world, likely through our mind-control abilities and/or the Jesuits’ social engineering prowess, and are moving humanity surreptitiously toward our own cannibalistic goals? Any word yet on whether or not we’re all lizard people from the interior of our hollow earth? Just wanna make sure I got my notes ready for my next RCIA class :whacky:
 
They really get into things that I never would have dreamed…
Did Pope John Paul II work for a Polish chemical company which somehow supplied gas or chemicals to the Nazi’s when he was young?:confused: (somehow, supposedly this got him the job of Pope, eventually)

The other responses are quite funny…
 
Lol, half of these Anti-Catholic whopper’s are so funny!

Type in “excatholics” on youtube, they spread filthy lies about Catholics. That we have to pay to enter the church, and this comes from ex Catholics!
 
Patrick_Joshua said:
Type in “excatholics” on youtube, they spread filthy lies about Catholics. That we have to pay to enter the church, and this comes from ex Catholics!
Click to expand...
Yes they are all ex-Catholics who attended catholic school for 27 years, attended mass every Sunday, and after their stint in the seminary they discovered that they had never been exposed to scripture and learned that…“insert whopper here”.

Chuck
 
Hi, Chuck,

Yes, these sad cases are nothing short of amazing.

God bless
clmowry said:
Yes they are all ex-Catholics who attended catholic school for 27 years, attended mass every Sunday, and after their stint in the seminary they discovered that they had never been exposed to scripture and learned that…“insert whopper here”.

Chuck
Click to expand...
 
You know, I have been Catholic for half a century, and I have never known a time when our church wasn’t being pestered by such stories and wild tales about our church…and many of them and some new ones have been named here. These people who say these things are saying things that are nothing but excrement. They have no faith of their own so they set out to tear down the most visible and tangible sign of faith, The Roman Catholic Church. Most of them are paranoids, and as has been suggested they probably need medication. Some of them may be borderline personalities not recieving treatment. At any rate, the only fun they have is pursuing the pink elephant as one of you so aptly put it. Their maladies are made worse by the tool of the internet which, like any created thing, can be used for good or evil…or sometimes just plain stupidity.
Jesus commissioned the Catholic Church to preach the gospel to every creature…and that is what she has been doing for 2000 years…yep…and just like Jesus who was accused of being the prince of darkness, or having a demon himself, she is persecuted. Jesus said, " marvel not if the world hate you because it hated me before it hated you–the servant is not greater than the teacher." Satan hates Jesus because the incarnation was the beginning of his end. Yes, as the story of the Garden of Eden said, Mary has crushed the serpent’s head by giving birth to his enemy–The Prince of Peace. He still influences people to persecute Catholics and all Christians and people of good will because he is jealous of God and does not want God’s reign of love and justice to be made manifest…so…don’t lose heart…and though these stories seem never to “go away”…these stupid gossips and falsehoods about Catholics,.they shall indeed pass away…and only Christ’s words will remain…and the Catholic Church has ever proclaimed that word and she ever will until Christ comes again…and all the lies and stupidity will be gone from the memory of all…forever. “Heaven and earth shall pass away, but my words abide forever”. We are his church…we must not forget that.
Peace
JT
 
Hi, Janine,

Do not get discouraged. Those who criticize the Catholic Church today, have a long ancestory - dating back to when their fathers were shouting curses at Christ when He hung on the Cross dying for our sins. The important thing to remember is that He prayed for His persecutors - and we can do no less.

God bless
Janine_Therese said:
You know, I have been Catholic for half a century, and I have never known a time when our church wasn’t being pestered by such stories and wild tales about our church…and many of them and some new ones have been named here. These people who say these things are saying things that are nothing but excrement. They have no faith of their own so they set out to tear down the most visible and tangible sign of faith, The Roman Catholic Church. Most of them are paranoids, and as has been suggested they probably need medication. Some of them may be borderline personalities not recieving treatment. At any rate, the only fun they have is pursuing the pink elephant as one of you so aptly put it. Their maladies are made worse by the tool of the internet which, like any created thing, can be used for good or evil…or sometimes just plain stupidity.
Jesus commissioned the Catholic Church to preach the gospel to every creature…and that is what she has been doing for 2000 years…yep…and just like Jesus who was accused of being the prince of darkness, or having a demon himself, she is persecuted. Jesus said, " marvel not if the world hate you because it hated me before it hated you–the servant is not greater than the teacher." Satan hates Jesus because the incarnation was the beginning of his end. Yes, as the story of the Garden of Eden said, Mary has crushed the serpent’s head by giving birth to his enemy–The Prince of Peace. He still influences people to persecute Catholics and all Christians and people of good will because he is jealous of God and does not want God’s reign of love and justice to be made manifest…so…don’t lose heart…and though these stories seem never to “go away”…these stupid gossips and falsehoods about Catholics,.they shall indeed pass away…and only Christ’s words will remain…and the Catholic Church has ever proclaimed that word and she ever will until Christ comes again…and all the lies and stupidity will be gone from the memory of all…forever. “Heaven and earth shall pass away, but my words abide forever”. We are his church…we must not forget that.
Peace
JT
Click to expand...
 
human_being said:
They really get into things that I never would have dreamed…
Did Pope John Paul II work for a Polish chemical company which somehow supplied gas or chemicals to the Nazi’s when he was young?:confused: (somehow, supposedly this got him the job of Pope, eventually)

The other responses are quite funny…
Click to expand...
Back in 1939, the Nazis closed the Jagiellonian University after the invasion of Poland, where Karol Wojtyła Jr. (the future John Paul II) was studying. All able-bodied males were required to work, and, from 1940 to 1944, Wojtyła variously worked as a messenger for a restaurant, a manual labourer in a limestone quarry and for the Solvay chemical factory to avoid being deported to Germany.
So, er no. I don’t really see how working in a chemical factory automatically makes you a Pope. If it did, we would have had a lot of Popes by now. 😛

BTW, when JPII was a kid, he often played a goalkeeper at soccer (aka football). School football games were often organised between teams of Jews and Catholics in Wadowice (where there was a population of around 2,000 Jews), and he would volunteer as a substitute goalkeeper on the Jewish side if they were short of players. 😉
 
I was raised by anti-Catholic baptist parents. Dad was a baptist minister…yeah, i was a preacher’s kid. I heard some OUTrageous stuff, some of it sad and sick, but the funniest one I ever heard was:

Mommy, Kathy next door says she and her family have to go to Mass every Sunday or it’s a sin.

Susie, that’s because the Church wants their offereings so they can be rich.

hahahahahahahaha…so silly.

People are finally getting it in my life finally and don’t pull stuff around me anymore. Someone said something very rude to me about my priest a couple of weeks ago, and my response was (I smiled as I said it) “What about that sentence makes you think I would want to repond.” End of discussion. 😃

No one runs down my family to me, and no one runs down my Church to me. And no one runs down my Heavenly mama. 😃

I’m nice about it, but those are the boundaries for the discussions.

Recently though I got a joke on an email from a catholic friend, actually my Godmother’s husband, the joke was about priests and nuns (feeling nauseous thinking of the joke even), and there was a graphic that showed a woman in a bikini (no top)…OH BOY would my Godmother’s hub be in HOT water if I told her about that joke. Anyway, I sent him a terse reply about the joke…and then I just fixed my email so his emails go straight to the trash can. (I have a “three strikes and you’re out” rule about emails I don’t like…haha

I grew up hearing that kind of trash, and I just always thouht it was wonderful even as a little kid, that someone would want to dedicate their life to full time service. Now being in a parish and being around the priests and nuns, I even see how much more that we the parishioners are their family.
 
this is crazy, but said/sick also…i remember a discussion with my dad when I was a teen…he handed me this paper which was supposedly an oath that all knights of columbus have to take vowing to kill protestants,and especially women proteswtants who were pregnant…ick…maybe i shouldn’t have told you that, but it’s true that’s what he said…now I just have to go get on my knees and thank our Lord and Saviour ONE MORE TIME for bringing me home to His Church…and the next knight of columbus gets a hug!!! (maybe i’m too sensitive about this stuff…i have a tear in my eye remembering my dad telling me that and how STOOOPID I thought that sounded).

We have to remember to pray for the people that make these dumb remarks. Sigh
 
Has anyone mentioned the theory that the Black Plague was caused by a Catholic bishop ordering all the cats to be killed, thinking they were possessed by demons?
I came acrost it in a book about the various breeds of cats, and I went :eek: :nope: :ouch: :doh2: .
Makes you wonder how :whistle:Jack Chick:rolleyes: built his wee Time Machine, to go back in time & spread the:takeoff: :whacky: …
 
oh oh oh wait…my mom once said about a guy at church who was a cradle catholic, but had divorced and remarried a baptist…and they both came to the baptist church…he was rebaptized after his emotional “i accept jesus as my personal saviour moment”…and he became a sunday school teacher…he and his wife were very nice people…soo…

my mom said, “well you know what they say, catholics always make the best christians!”

right she was… 😉
 
Zooey said:
Has anyone mentioned the theory that the Black Plague was caused by a Catholic bishop ordering all the cats to be killed, thinking they were possessed by demons?
Click to expand...
The editor of our local weekly paper (who has some decidedly odd beliefs) wrote that - along with other anti-Catholic garbage - in an editorial. He actually printed my rebuttal. But we did cancel our subscription. 🙂
 
Hi, Patrick457,

This was truly a heart-warming story…🙂 Thank you for sharing it.

God bless
patrick457 said:
Back in 1939, the Nazis closed the Jagiellonian University after the invasion of Poland, where Karol Wojtyła Jr. (the future John Paul II) was studying. All able-bodied males were required to work, and, from 1940 to 1944, Wojtyła variously worked as a messenger for a restaurant, a manual labourer in a limestone quarry and for the Solvay chemical factory to avoid being deported to Germany.
So, er no. I don’t really see how working in a chemical factory automatically makes you a Pope. If it did, we would have had a lot of Popes by now. 😛

BTW, when JPII was a kid, he often played a goalkeeper at soccer (aka football). School football games were often organised between teams of Jews and Catholics in Wadowice (where there was a population of around 2,000 Jews), and he would volunteer as a substitute goalkeeper on the Jewish side if they were short of players. 😉
Click to expand...
 
Zooey said:
Has anyone mentioned the theory that the Black Plague was caused by a Catholic bishop ordering all the cats to be killed, thinking they were possessed by demons?
Click to expand...
I’ve heard that one too.

It reminds me of the “Catholics must eat fish on Friday because the pope wanted to prop up the fishing industry.” First, Catholics don’t have to eat fish on Friday, they have to abstain from *carne *which is the flesh of a warm blooded animal. In some cases Catholics have the option to substitute another penitential act instead of abstaining from carne, but I digress…

Second, the refrigerated trucking industry hasn’t existed for very long. It’s hard to imagine propping up an industry that can’t move it’s product from where fish are abundant to where fish are scarce. “Hi were selling fish that we caught days ago. They’re sitting on the cart out in the sun. You can smell them from here!”

Sounds like a “fish” story.
 
I’ve got it!
I can prove Jesuits are the Anti-Christ.
We all know the French phrase for “I am” is “Je Suis”.
Now, Jesuit = Je Sui T.
Je=I
Sui=Am (We all know the s in “Suis” is silent, so It doesn’t count)
T= A cross=Christ
“I am Christ”
Anyone who claims to be Christ obviously is not Christ, but the Anti-Christ.
 
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