When you are in love, do their faults endear them to you?

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erine

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I don’t mean that you want them to do bad things, but does being in love mean that their faults or issues endear you to the person more because that person is yours and you love them, even as you try to guide them away from sin? I’m asking because someone told me this maxim once and it seems true but I can’t quite get it.

For example I work with kids and I love their personalities even with their quirks etc, even as I try to help them do better. Even though they drive me crazy too.

I am not married but I can see this idea must be the case in marriage. I feel like our culture is hell bent on making up all these insane rules and dos and don’ts for who you are allowed to fall in love with and who you aren’t. I always hear this thing from single people who go on about deeply analyzing what marriage should be. But I never hear that from married couples, lol, because I think they are humbled by the reality. The thing is I think to love a sinner you have to love them personally not in spite of their flaws but with their flaws. God does not love us in spite of our sin but with our sin right now. Our sin blocks us from knowing that.

Basically I’m fed up because I’ve fallen in love before and got hurt and nothing came of it and it was the best thing that ever happened to me even as my heart broke so God could reach it better. Someone told me I “shouldn’t” love this person. While I’m no longer able to give myself to him emotionally because its too dangerous, I still care. I can’t relate to people who have never let themselves fall for someone. They seem cold and into labeling people and won’t relate to the whole person.

I have had so many guys want to make me into this weird lifeless Stepford wife and “fix” me so I am “proper” before they date me, and so many girls say oh that guy needs a better job clothes etc and I feel like people just want to love this image and not the person.

I feel like only a relationship where you love them with their flaws can be personal.

Any experiences or (name removed by moderator)ut from married people would be most welcome
 
erine said:
I don’t mean that you want them to do bad things, but does being in love mean that their faults or issues endear you to the person more because that person is yours and you love them, even as you try to guide them away from sin? I’m asking because someone told me this maxim once and it seems true but I can’t quite get it.

For example I work with kids and I love their personalities even with their quirks etc, even as I try to help them do better. Even though they drive me crazy too.

I am not married but I can see this idea must be the case in marriage. I feel like our culture is hell bent on making up all these insane rules and dos and don’ts for who you are allowed to fall in love with and who you aren’t. I always hear this thing from single people who go on about deeply analyzing what marriage should be. But I never hear that from married couples, lol, because I think they are humbled by the reality. The thing is I think to love a sinner you have to love them personally not in spite of their flaws but with their flaws. God does not love us in spite of our sin but with our sin right now. Our sin blocks us from knowing that.

Basically I’m fed up because I’ve fallen in love before and got hurt and nothing came of it and it was the best thing that ever happened to me even as my heart broke so God could reach it better. Someone told me I “shouldn’t” love this person. While I’m no longer able to give myself to him emotionally because its too dangerous, I still care. I can’t relate to people who have never let themselves fall for someone. They seem cold and into labeling people and won’t relate to the whole person.

I have had so many guys want to make me into this weird lifeless Stepford wife and “fix” me so I am “proper” before they date me, and so many girls say oh that guy needs a better job clothes etc and I feel like people just want to love this image and not the person.

I feel like only a relationship where you love them with their flaws can be personal.

Any experiences or (name removed by moderator)ut from married people would be most welcome
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In the 1960s there was a comedy recording called WHEN YOU’RE IN LOVE, THE WHOLE WORLD IS JEWISH
You Don’t Have to Be Jewish When You’re in Love the Whole World Is Jewish
Musical Album
 
Well, I am very much in love with my husband… but his faults make me crazy. I have to work very hard and very intentionally to not let each and everything little thing get to me sometimes. If I let it get to me, then I start to notice every. little. thing. When that happens, I start to nitpick at him in my mind, and that is simply unfair and unloving. But no, I wouldn’t say his faults are endearing to me. 😃 More like the cross I have to bear…:D:D:D
 
Ophelia23 said:
Well, I am very much in love with my husband… but his faults make me crazy. I have to work very hard and very intentionally to not let each and everything little thing get to me sometimes. If I let it get to me, then I start to notice every. little. thing. When that happens, I start to nitpick at him in my mind, and that is simply unfair and unloving. But no, I wouldn’t say his faults are endearing to me. 😃 More like the cross I have to bear…:D:D:D
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Yes, I agree with this.

I’ve been married to my dear husband for 34 years, and we dated for 6 years before we got married. So I know him well. And I agree with Ophelia23–I definitely do NOT find his faults endearing, and he does not find my faults endearing.

Both of us would prefer that we conquer our faults and become better people. We try to help each other to conquer faults and become better, but sometimes our “help” becomes a complaint that ends up hurting the spouse rather than helping them.

But we are willing to take the faults along with the spouse knowing that all of us are sinners, and that in heaven, we will finally be faultless and free of all sin.

OP, it might be helpful to define what you mean by “faults”.

If by faults, you mean mannerisms or quirks, such as frowning while listening to music, or cracking knuckles, these are not sins or flaws, and spouses should learn to live with them. They are merely annoyances, but we can learn to not get annoyed by setting our minds to the task and working on our own attitudes.

When I say “faults,” I mean sins or character flaws.

For example, a losing one’s temper is a character flaw. We shouldn’t ever find “losing one’s temper” endearing because it is a FLAW, not just a trait or mannerism or a quirk. It’s WRONG to lose our tempers. If our spouse does this, we should strive to partner with them to help them to overcome this fault.

You have to be careful. Being in love can make us blind to faults. A lot of men and women end up married to monsters because they are blind to faults and find them “endearing mannerisms” rather than sins and flaws.

Anyone who is in love should be careful to LISTEN to friends and family who try to warn them about the person they are in love with.

Yes, sometimes clinging parents or jealous friends find faults where there are no faults.

But more often than not, the person who is warning us sees something “not right” and is trying to let us know. We need to step away from our emotional attachment, and try to think with the logical side of our brain so that we can honestly assess the one we think we love, and make a rational decision about whether a trait is a quirk/mannerism, or a fault/flaw.

If we decide that the one we love has a fault/flaw, we have to make a rational, logical decision about whether the fault/flaw is serious or even dangerous. ALL of us have faults and flaws, but some, such as frequently losing one’s temper, should probably be a deal breaker. It’s not good to be in love with someone that we are afraid of.
 
Erine said:

“I don’t mean that you want them to do bad things, but does being in love mean that their faults or issues endear you to the person more because that person is yours and you love them, even as you try to guide them away from sin? I’m asking because someone told me this maxim once and it seems true but I can’t quite get it.”

I think it is true for quirks or faults to be cute or funny when you are crazy in love, but once you’ve known the person for a long time, the same exact things make you want to bury them in a shallow grave.

Being very much in love makes us more forgiving than we will ever be again.

“For example I work with kids and I love their personalities even with their quirks etc, even as I try to help them do better. Even though they drive me crazy too.”

That sounds like the same thing.

“I have had so many guys want to make me into this weird lifeless Stepford wife and “fix” me so I am “proper” before they date me, and so many girls say oh that guy needs a better job clothes etc and I feel like people just want to love this image and not the person.”

From a guy, it sounds kind of terrible to do the Pygmalion thing, but many, many wives have redone their new husbands’ wardrobes. A woman I know well married a man who owned several dozen white shirts (in various shades of yellowness) and bought him colored shirts instead. Also, some adult men are still wearing shirts they first got in junior high and others wear really ratty clothes. To edit and expand one’s husband’s wardrobe is a pretty normal wifely activity.
 
If you don’t have the capacity to pass on a relationship with somebody you fall for, you are in for some serious grief, yes. Marry somebody you fall for, but do not date everybody you fall for. That is not cold. That is necessary. Consider passing on the bad prospect that you fall for to be practice for passing on the great prospect that you fall for but that you cannot pursue because you are already married. Only one catch per boat, people. You have to let the rest swim free.

We’ve been married over 20 years. Of the things that make us shake our heads, include these:
  1. “I went along with it, but now he/she owes me.” Who on earth wants to keep score like that? Marry someone who looks out for you, and look out for him/her.
  2. The person who marries somebody with the idea of “fixing” their faults.
a) No one wants you to fix their faults. They want you to support them while they fix their own faults. If they agree that the stuff you think is a fault is a fault, if they definitely intend to change that about themselves, then maybe they’ll change. Probably they won’t. If you want to be in a club where there is hell to pay when members don’t fix the personal failings that the club has deemed unacceptable, have at it. Sounds like h&%$ on earth to me.

b) People who want your help in addressing problem areas do not want you to grab their box of crayons. Bend over backwards to help them solve their problems their own way. That means that if you help them pick a new wardrobe you do not get to force them to dress to suit you. You have to convince them that they want to try your suggestions. No bullying.
  1. Saying you don’t care about earning potential when you don’t know how to control your spending is ridiculous. Debt and overspending are great marriage killers; the ability to make do with less is the opposite. The less stuff you “need”, the happier you will be, because you will be free to let that rich attorney you married abandon “it all” before “it all” makes him go insane in favor of a position that pays a fraction as much in a one-horse town where he’s happy. That can only happen if you put people before stuff and marry someone who has the same attitude. Find that, and marry who you will.
  2. Your friends get to pick their boyfriends, and you get to pick yours, but if you don’t want their opinion then don’t use them for complaint panel. You can use them as a brainstorming panel, but general bellyaching will be taken as invitation for them all to fulfill their dream of being an advice columnist. Not that you personally have done this, but just to say that whiners can’t complain when they are buried in advice. We only get to act indignant when we get unsolicited advice. The other kind, we have to content ourselves with ignoring the bad advice, not complain that it was given.
I had a boyfriend with whom I considered marriage who had quietly slipped all these things in that I shouldn’t do. I didn’t realize how much I’d given away. When we broke up, it was like a heavy weight lifting off of me and a tight band released from around my chest. A bullet dodged, there! Be thankful for those. You learned about yourself, and you don’t have a failed marriage to show for it. Don’t be required to learn the same lesson too many times…pay attention!!
 
Thanks this is really interesting. I grew up around crazy people so I have no idea what is healthy. I am naturally submissive so it’s hard to walk that line between the guidance I need vs just plain abuse being confused with healthy leadership.

I can’t really seem to get a real life relationship. A guy I was in love with basically confessed his love but then is basically not marriageable person. He couldn’t even stay in touch. But he actually called me neurotic and said that’s why it didn’t work. I am angry at myself for loving him because it isn’t real. Why do I even care oh because you know I keep getting this strong locution that I am called to marriage with him. I have begged God to remove the locution and tested the spirits. I get this thing hundreds of times a day. My spiritual director told me to forget this guy. Well I would have a long time ago if I didn’t have this locution. Don’t make fun of me or judge me. It’s not a mental thing I can sure you it’s from outside of my mind and I have begged Gid to get rid of it. I hope it’s not from him because this guy is a nightmare just like my life. I am praying that thus locution is just a sign pointing to someone better.

I wish God called me to single life but I know He wants me married. He has made that clear to me.

Like was just written I am forced to set boundaries with someone even though I am attracted and enjoy his company the rare times I see him. I am sure this is because of my dad being an abuser and I’m holding on for dear life to make St. Joseph as my dad so I don’t go crazy with this whole thing. Clearly I don’t know anyone who relates to my experience. I never met someone who had non-relationship with a jerky guy who kept getting a locution he was the future spoue. God is not perverse so it can’t possibly be this guy. I keep testing the spirits as I’m told to do, and it seems the locution is from God so I hope it is simply a name or a sign and not really this man. This locution is not from my head in terms of being imaginary, as I have had spiritual counselors actually confirm it, but I just can’t imagine it can be literal. At any rate, losing my mind.

My problem is, as someone mentioned, I do tend to forgive all the time out of love and forget past treatment, but I do it with people who aren’t committed and learn to treat me bad. When I setbboundary with him last time, he sort of woke up and stopped treating me like a joke and then left, like he knew I wouldn’t find it funny anymore. Once I asked him what he majored I’m in college (he’s older) and he said “beer and cheating.” yeah I know bad news. He thinks trying to suck me into his sickness is cute. Why God is trying me with this locution I cannot fathom. I’m praying to St. Rita a lot. My biggest desire is to know God’s will and do my vocation.

Tell me if I’m wrong: I think that once someone has taken actions to commit to me and we are engaged or married, then I can let my natural tendency to forgive over and over and just love him however little he can give me. But before that I think I have to guard my heart jealously in God’s heart because otherwise I will keep getting these guys who want the perks of having a wife (self esteem, someone there for them) without actually doing anything.

I always had to take care of my sister growing up and brother bc we weren’t safe. I Never got to be a child. Since age 2 I have had others lives dependent on me, literally. I think people who haven’t had that and won’t until they have kids can’t understand me and think I’m mean when actually I just know more than they do about life. Doesn’t exactly make me a desirable person to marry though since everyone just wants someone who can justbsmile nd be charming. Never mind character.

If you don’t mind could you pray this dumb locution stops. I can assure you I don’t want it. Seeing spiritual director tomorrow thank God.

Now you think I m crazy but I am used to that. But yes I suppose I find people’s flaws drive me crazy but also I can’t stop caring because of their flaws because then I would never find anyone good enough.

Thanks for letting me whine about myself.
 
Erine said:

“I get this thing hundreds of times a day.”

That sounds like it requires some professional psychological investigation. OCD comes to mind. I suspect it would do you some good to have both a spiritual director and a therapist to help you with your relationship issues from different angles.

“Tell me if I’m wrong: I think that once someone has taken actions to commit to me and we are engaged or married, then I can let my natural tendency to forgive over and over and just love him however little he can give me. But before that I think I have to guard my heart jealously in God’s heart because otherwise I will keep getting these guys who want the perks of having a wife (self esteem, someone there for them) without actually doing anything.”

I would remove “engaged” from that paragraph, but otherwise, yes. I think you should expect more from a husband, though.

You might want to post your relationship issues on DearWendy.com as they come up, because those commentors, although fairly secular, tend to be fairly astute on whether or not a relationship is viable. (They have an acronym for the sort of situations you are describing: MOA (Move On Already.)

“Now you think I m crazy but I am used to that. But yes I suppose I find people’s flaws drive me crazy but also I can’t stop caring because of their flaws because then I would never find anyone good enough.”

That sounds a little OCD.

Best wishes!
 
erine said:
Thanks this is really interesting. I grew up around crazy people so I have no idea what is healthy. I am naturally submissive so it’s hard to walk that line between the guidance I need vs just plain abuse being confused with healthy leadership.

I can’t really seem to get a real life relationship. A guy I was in love with basically confessed his love but then is basically not marriageable person. He couldn’t even stay in touch. But he actually called me neurotic and said that’s why it didn’t work. I am angry at myself for loving him because it isn’t real. Why do I even care oh because you know I keep getting this strong locution that I am called to marriage with him. I have begged God to remove the locution and tested the spirits. I get this thing hundreds of times a day. My spiritual director told me to forget this guy. Well I would have a long time ago if I didn’t have this locution. Don’t make fun of me or judge me. It’s not a mental thing I can sure you it’s from outside of my mind and I have begged Gid to get rid of it. I hope it’s not from him because this guy is a nightmare just like my life. I am praying that thus locution is just a sign pointing to someone better.

I wish God called me to single life but I know He wants me married. He has made that clear to me.

Like was just written I am forced to set boundaries with someone even though I am attracted and enjoy his company the rare times I see him. I am sure this is because of my dad being an abuser and I’m holding on for dear life to make St. Joseph as my dad so I don’t go crazy with this whole thing. Clearly I don’t know anyone who relates to my experience. I never met someone who had non-relationship with a jerky guy who kept getting a locution he was the future spoue. God is not perverse so it can’t possibly be this guy. I keep testing the spirits as I’m told to do, and it seems the locution is from God so I hope it is simply a name or a sign and not really this man. This locution is not from my head in terms of being imaginary, as I have had spiritual counselors actually confirm it, but I just can’t imagine it can be literal. At any rate, losing my mind.

My problem is, as someone mentioned, I do tend to forgive all the time out of love and forget past treatment, but I do it with people who aren’t committed and learn to treat me bad. When I setbboundary with him last time, he sort of woke up and stopped treating me like a joke and then left, like he knew I wouldn’t find it funny anymore. Once I asked him what he majored I’m in college (he’s older) and he said “beer and cheating.” yeah I know bad news. He thinks trying to suck me into his sickness is cute. Why God is trying me with this locution I cannot fathom. I’m praying to St. Rita a lot. My biggest desire is to know God’s will and do my vocation.

Tell me if I’m wrong: I think that once someone has taken actions to commit to me and we are engaged or married, then I can let my natural tendency to forgive over and over and just love him however little he can give me. But before that I think I have to guard my heart jealously in God’s heart because otherwise I will keep getting these guys who want the perks of having a wife (self esteem, someone there for them) without actually doing anything.

I always had to take care of my sister growing up and brother bc we weren’t safe. I Never got to be a child. Since age 2 I have had others lives dependent on me, literally. I think people who haven’t had that and won’t until they have kids can’t understand me and think I’m mean when actually I just know more than they do about life. Doesn’t exactly make me a desirable person to marry though since everyone just wants someone who can justbsmile nd be charming. Never mind character.

If you don’t mind could you pray this dumb locution stops. I can assure you I don’t want it. Seeing spiritual director tomorrow thank God.

Now you think I m crazy but I am used to that. But yes I suppose I find people’s flaws drive me crazy but also I can’t stop caring because of their flaws because then I would never find anyone good enough.

Thanks for letting me whine about myself.
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Could we get you some cheese to go with that “whine”?😃
 
Xantippe said:
Erine said:

“I get this thing hundreds of times a day.”

That sounds like it requires some professional psychological investigation. OCD comes to mind. I suspect it would do you some good to have both a spiritual director and a therapist to help you with your relationship issues from different angles.

“Tell me if I’m wrong: I think that once someone has taken actions to commit to me and we are engaged or married, then I can let my natural tendency to forgive over and over and just love him however little he can give me. But before that I think I have to guard my heart jealously in God’s heart because otherwise I will keep getting these guys who want the perks of having a wife (self esteem, someone there for them) without actually doing anything.”

I would remove “engaged” from that paragraph, but otherwise, yes. I think you should expect more from a husband, though.

You might want to post your relationship issues on DearWendy.com as they come up, because those commentors, although fairly secular, tend to be fairly astute on whether or not a relationship is viable. (They have an acronym for the sort of situations you are describing: MOA (Move On Already.)

“Now you think I m crazy but I am used to that. But yes I suppose I find people’s flaws drive me crazy but also I can’t stop caring because of their flaws because then I would never find anyone good enough.”

That sounds a little OCD.

Best wishes!
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O that’s smart it is probably my OCD that is causing this. That could definitely be it. I never thought of that. I knew I wasn’t mentally ill in the sense of “hearing voices”, so I figured it was spiritual but OCD makes sense. I prayed for it to leave and it’s not bugging me today. But remember as weird as it sounds other spiritually sensitive counselors have “heard” it too in a way or confirmed it I don’t know how else to explain. At any rate I feel better talking about it because it’s hard to live with.

I call myself crazy yes and OCD but I am just paranoid to trust someone because of the past. So I think St. Joseph is my key right now to getting a healthy relationship with men.
 
erine said:
Yes, I like Gouda especially or havarti and spinach; also aged swiss. Do you like olives or crackers with that too? 😃
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My favorite cheese is mozzarella String cheese straight up by itself.🙂
 
Xantippe said:
From a guy, it sounds kind of terrible to do the Pygmalion thing, but many, many wives have redone their new husbands’ wardrobes. A woman I know well married a man who owned several dozen white shirts (in various shades of yellowness) and bought him colored shirts instead. Also, some adult men are still wearing shirts they first got in junior high and others wear really ratty clothes. To edit and expand one’s husband’s wardrobe is a pretty normal wifely activity.
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There’s one thing a shirt has in common with a wife: if it’s a good one that works for you for many years, there really isn’t a need to change it. 😛

Women have that sort of thing whereby they need to be agents of change. Seriously, ladies, get over it. 😛
erine said:
My problem is, as someone mentioned, I do tend to forgive all the time out of love and forget past treatment, but I do it with people who aren’t committed and learn to treat me bad. When I setbboundary with him last time, he sort of woke up and stopped treating me like a joke and then left, like he knew I wouldn’t find it funny anymore. Once I asked him what he majored I’m in college (he’s older) and he said “beer and cheating.” yeah I know bad news. He thinks trying to suck me into his sickness is cute. Why God is trying me with this locution I cannot fathom. I’m praying to St. Rita a lot. My biggest desire is to know God’s will and do my vocation.
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I majored in gaming and falling for the wrong girls. Anyway, if this helps any: what you’re talking about is similar to that reflex a woman feels sometimes when she’s complimented or praise, which makes her hit the ‘bad girl’ tone, so she downplays your compliments that relate to her character or she even asserts a right to be somewhat on the ‘bad girl’ side, doing silly things sometimes. Guess that’s an unresolved search for affirmation, possibly a search for unconditional love, who knows. But it can be mighty annoying, mostly because it tears down that princess image of her you had in your mind.

Alternatively, an older person may be distancing himself from the worth of his formal education compared to what he really knows about life and his field of knowledge or practical work after years. For example, the extent of what you know in law school compared to what you know several years out of it is laughable, linguists also learn through experience, probably engineers and hard scientists. Such a person may also be distancing himself from a sort of flippant moral character he had in his youth. So I wouldn’t jump to conclusions. You need more information for that, but yeah, you need information. Can’t really ignore such things as if they hadn’t been said.
erine said:
otherwise I will keep getting these guys who want the perks of having a wife (self esteem, someone there for them) without actually doing anything.
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Oh yeah, there’s nothing like a nagging wife for one’s self esteem. 😛
 
Chevalier said:

“There’s one thing a shirt has in common with a wife: if it’s a good one that works for you for many years, there really isn’t a need to change it.”

My rule is that if an item of clothing is so woebegone that it is no longer acceptable to donate it, it is time for it to go.
 
Xantippe said:
Chevalier said:

“There’s one thing a shirt has in common with a wife: if it’s a good one that works for you for many years, there really isn’t a need to change it.”

My rule is that if an item of clothing is so woebegone that it is no longer acceptable to donate it, it is time for it to go.
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Check this wedding scene out. Riot!
► 0:20► 0:20
www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKsyUvorhzI
May 18, 2012 - Uploaded by TheWebJoker
Bride Loses Her Teeth During Wedding!!! Watch This Poor Bride Endure An Embarrassing …
 
Erine,

I think you might find St. John of the Cross’ The Ascent of Mount Carmel enlightening, specifically Book 2. He talks extensively about supernatural communications, including locutions. In a nutshell, he says to pay no attention to them beyond reporting them to your spiritual advisor. Often they come from you or the devil, not God. If they do come from God, it is entirely possible you will not interpret them correctly. St. John cautions spiritual advisors about doing anything that would promote an attachment to supposed, supernatural communications.

As far as everything else: way beyond my meager capability for useful advice.
 
chevalier said:
There’s one thing a shirt has in common with a wife: if it’s a good one that works for you for many years, there really isn’t a need to change it. 😛

Women have that sort of thing whereby they need to be agents of change. Seriously, ladies, get over it. 😛

I majored in gaming and falling for the wrong girls. Anyway, if this helps any: what you’re talking about is similar to that reflex a woman feels sometimes when she’s complimented or praise, which makes her hit the ‘bad girl’ tone, so she downplays your compliments that relate to her character or she even asserts a right to be somewhat on the ‘bad girl’ side, doing silly things sometimes. Guess that’s an unresolved search for affirmation, possibly a search for unconditional love, who knows. But it can be mighty annoying, mostly because it tears down that princess image of her you had in your mind.

Alternatively, an older person may be distancing himself from the worth of his formal education compared to what he really knows about life and his field of knowledge or practical work after years. For example, the extent of what you know in law school compared to what you know several years out of it is laughable, linguists also learn through experience, probably engineers and hard scientists. Such a person may also be distancing himself from a sort of flippant moral character he had in his youth. So I wouldn’t jump to conclusions. You need more information for that, but yeah, you need information. Can’t really ignore such things as if they hadn’t been said.

Oh yeah, there’s nothing like a nagging wife for one’s self esteem. 😛
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Wise words … As for that last comment…Ha! 🙂
 
bsf said:
Erine,

I think you might find St. John of the Cross’ The Ascent of Mount Carmel enlightening, specifically Book 2. He talks extensively about supernatural communications, including locutions. In a nutshell, he says to pay no attention to them beyond reporting them to your spiritual advisor. Often they come from you or the devil, not God. If they do come from God, it is entirely possible you will not interpret them correctly. St. John cautions spiritual advisors about doing anything that would promote an attachment to supposed, supernatural communications.

As far as everything else: way beyond my meager capability for useful advice.
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I know all about testing locutions though I feel like people don’t take me seriously when I have them. I look young and I think a lot of people think I’m just desperate for a Disney fantasy when in reality I just want to do God’s will. So yes I finally after a lot of testing and telling my advisor simply ignore the thing. I am sure it was “from God” as in not from the devil and God permitted it. However prophecies are only comprehended upon their fulfillment and I think it simply means something else than the surface meaning. As in I needed this transitional thing bc the real truth I’m not ready for.

God will provide better things.
 
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