Where are all the devout young women at?

[edwest2]

Wear dresses? Wow! Wait a minute. What’s wrong with that?

High expectations? In today’s hypersexualized culture, you better have them. Any college should not be party time. It’s school. If you want to meet devout young women, join a Church ministry, even if it’s at a different Church. My last girlfriend loved God, had standards and was fun and feminine. They are out there but today, it’s an uphill battle after 40 years of confusion.

amazon.com/Extreme-Makeover-Transformed-Conformed-Culture/dp/1586175610

The same for guys - even Christian guys - who are led, by the media, to put sex ahead of really getting to know the other person.

avemariasingles.com/?gclid=CPKsy8ym4sMCFWYV7AodEhYAQw

Seek and ye shall find. And even when you’ve found one Church ministry or group, look for a few more. Maybe when you find something, you can later share that with others in the same boat as you.

God bless,
Ed

 

[StSentry83]

Wear dresses? Wow! Wait a minute. What’s wrong with that?

High expectations? In today’s hypersexualized culture, you better have them. Any college should not be party time. It’s school.

Hey come on man, if college isn’t party time, then no time is party time.

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

Hey come on man, if college isn’t party time, then no time is party time.

 

[Xantippe]

Hey come on man, if college isn’t party time, then no time is party time.

As far as I can tell, early elementary school is party time.

 

[edwest2]

Hey come on man, if college isn’t party time, then no time is party time.

Dude,

We had parties after school hours, and those were rare, especially if you were carrying a heavy class-load. What was common, at the time, was graduating, getting a good job and getting married. Her dad was also part of the process. He didn’t want to see his daughter stuck with a drug or alcohol abuser.

Ed

 

[lerapt78]

OP, do you actually live in Philly, or around the city?

My parish is in the heart of Center City and has a young adult group. The members are mostly college-age, and the female-to-male ratio is usually 2-3 to 1.

Feel free to PM me for more info if you’d like.

 

[StSentry83]

Dude,

We had parties after school hours, and those were rare, especially if you were carrying a heavy class-load. What was common, at the time, was graduating, getting a good job and getting married. Her dad was also part of the process. He didn’t want to see his daughter stuck with a drug or alcohol abuser.

Ed

All admirable stuff. But does anyone ever say on their deathbed, “I wish I had less fun”?

And boy I tell ya, I wish I graduated back in your day when people could get these “good jobs” you talk about. Even the top of my college class is still searching for those mythical “good jobs” and it’s 10 years later.

 

[Xantippe]

All admirable stuff. But does anyone ever say on their deathbed, “I wish I had less fun”?

And boy I tell ya, I wish I graduated back in your day when people could get these “good jobs” you talk about. Even the top of my college class is still searching for those mythical “good jobs” and it’s 10 years later.

There is a lot of free or inexpensive wholesome fun available on college campuses, perhaps because the colleges are eager to steer students away from less wholesome fun.

It is important not to neglect studies, but it would be sad to pass by all of the wonderful options that are available to students these days.

 

[Colorad007]

Denver. Or at your local Latin Mass.

 

[Xantippe]

Here’s an idea–look for a more seriously Catholic college in your area and then watch their announcements for speakers and similar events. There’s generally food and so forth after lectures…It’s relatively easy to find fun people to talk to after something like that.

You might even want to take a course or two at a more seriously Catholic local college, budget and schedule permitting.

That’s actually something you can do after you graduate, too.

 

[heart4home]

So I go to a small college that is very liberal and has a student body that generally isn’t too interested in religion. Even though 1/3 of the student body is Catholic, only a small amount show up to weekly mass and only a handful of those people say the prayers/new translation and sing. There is a Catholic Ministry (Newman Center) on Campus but there is only 20 active people in it, me being one of only two freshman that are active in it and one of only three guys in the whole group. Although it’s nice to have a small group go to the Newman Center, the majority of the people really aren’t devout and are fine with just mass and Newman fellowship dinners. No one aside from me and two girls ever go to the confession offered after Mass, we haven’t gone on a retreat yet and I’m the only one who is pushing for more retreats, and no one even openly talks about their faith or what Christ is in their life when we have fellowship dinners at Newman, we’ll say grace and then people pretend like he doesn’t exist. I can’t be more involved in Newman, I’m already on the E-board and another leadership position, and I’m also super involved in a non-denominational Christian group on Campus that is like a youth group. The non-denom. is way more fun and although they’re pretty much all Protestant they do love Christ and have a fire for him in their hearts. Even through being involved in both organizations, I’ve yet to meet a devout girl who loves Christ AND is compatible with me. I’m not involved only to meet a girl, I do it to serve Christ, and I trust in God’s plan whatever that is. The lack of devout Christian girls is hard, I just thought that it would be easier for a devout guy to find a girl but it seems impossible. I don’t want to only limit myself to a devout Catholic girl who is an active Catholic, because if I did then I would die alone because I have met only 2 at my school. It’s disheartening and I just would like to see if there are actually young women out there who are deeply devout and love Christ. Maybe some ideas to meet other girls…

Perhaps the liberal school is the problem? The girls are out there, you just have to be looking in the right place. It seems somewhat unlikely that a truly devout Catholic is going to go to a “very liberal” (your words) college.

 

[lerapt78]

Perhaps the liberal school is the problem? The girls are out there, you just have to be looking in the right place. It seems somewhat unlikely that a truly devout Catholic is going to go to a “very liberal” (your words) college.

I understand what you’re saying about looking in the right places - and that is good advice - but I just want to point out that the college of one’s choosing doesn’t necessarily reflect a leaning toward liberalism.

When I was deciding where to attend college I narrowed it down to three possibilities - a Catholic University, a large state university, and a small liberal arts college. While the amount of religious devotion among students wasn’t first on my list of priorities, it did factor in somewhat. The third option was a college that is officially affiliated with the Presbyterian church, and at the time I thought that meant it would be fairly pro-Christian.

My first week of living on campus, I was handed a flyer from the school’s “newspaper” that advertised a local abortion clinic and an upcoming “gay pride” festival. A large portion of the student body was also into the hippy culture. Needless to say, it wasn’t as Christian-oriented as I assumed it would be when I made my choice.

In addition, what most attracted me to the college was that it has a fantastic program for the major I wanted to join, so even had I known that it wasn’t a very Christian school, I probably would have attended anyway for that reason alone. I remained a practicing Catholic, regardless.

My point being, that just because his school is liberal it doesn’t mean that there are few-to-no practicing young women there who may have selected it for specific reasons. He just needs to find the Catholic niche *within *the larger community.

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

I understand what you’re saying about looking in the right places - and that is good advice - but I just want to point out that the college of one’s choosing doesn’t necessarily reflect a leaning toward liberalism.

When I was deciding where to attend college I narrowed it down to three possibilities - a Catholic University, a large state university, and a small liberal arts college. While the amount of religious devotion among students wasn’t first on my list of priorities, it did factor in somewhat. The third option was a college that is officially affiliated with the Presbyterian church, and at the time I thought that meant it would be fairly pro-Christian.

My first week of living on campus, I was handed a flyer from the school’s “newspaper” that advertised a local abortion clinic and an upcoming “gay pride” festival. A large portion of the student body was also into the hippy culture. Needless to say, it wasn’t as Christian-oriented as I assumed it would be when I made my choice.

In addition, what most attracted me to the college was that it has a fantastic program for the major I wanted to join, so even had I known that it wasn’t a very Christian school, I probably would have attended anyway for that reason alone. I remained a practicing Catholic, regardless.

My point being, that just because his school is liberal it doesn’t mean that there are few-to-no practicing young women there who may have selected it for specific reasons. He just needs to find the Catholic niche *within *the larger community.

Some Catholic Universities are the most “liberal” and less devout choices out there. But I think the point is that the OP chose this school and obviously one of the most important things to the OP is this issue. So perhaps he did not investigate the school of his choice enough. But to be fair, when one is choosing colleges, I have never heard “So how are the Trad hotties in this joint…?”

 

[Xantippe]

Some Catholic Universities are the most “liberal” and less devout choices out there.

**But in my experience, even the worst of the usual suspects usually has an active minority of serious Catholics (which may include people that are rather liberal).

That’s been my experience at large well-known Catholic universities–it might not hold true for small liberal Catholic colleges. **

But I think the point is that the OP chose this school and obviously one of the most important things to the OP is this issue. So perhaps he did not investigate the school of his choice enough. But to be fair, when one is choosing colleges, I have never heard “So how are the Trad hotties in this joint…?”

Come to think of it, has anybody ever said “trad hottie” before you did?

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

Come to think of it, has anybody ever said “trad hottie” before you did?

LOL, Probably not, I think I will try it out on my wife…

 

[lerapt78]

Some Catholic Universities are the most “liberal” and less devout choices out there.

Hate to say that I have no trouble believing that. :sad_yes:

But I think the point is that the OP chose this school and obviously one of the most important things to the OP is this issue. So perhaps he did not investigate the school of his choice enough. But to be fair, when one is choosing colleges, I have never heard “So how are the Trad hotties in this joint…?”

Yes, but if the percentage of the student body that is involved in religious life was his main concern, and for whatever reason he didn’t accurately research this ahead of time (which I completely understand, having once been 18 years old and all too eager to fly the coop myself) …then, short of actually changing colleges, and redirecting his focus the next time around, I’m not sure what else can be suggested for the OP other than to give it some time and see if something develops within his group as he gets to know everyone a bit better. For goodness sake, he said he’s one of the *three *men out of 20 members, so at least the odds aren’t working against him!

Additionally, I think Lorelei12 made a very good point, which I missed earlier:

I think you need to re-evaluate your definition of “devout”. You write that word a lot of times in your post- what does it mean to you? You are spending time with women who go to Mass, participate in Newman activities, say grace, and so forth, and that is not good enough for you. Just because a person says grace and then does not immediately start talking about Christ doesn’t mean she is not devout. Some people are very “quietly” devout, and it doesn’t mean they somehow love Christ any less than you do.

I think perhaps what you mean to say is that you are having trouble finding someone as openly enthusiastic about your faith. It is fine to have that criteria, but realize that you might be overlooking some very faithful women who simply do not have the same personality traits as you do.

Catholics generally aren’t “on fire” in the same way that some Protestants (like Baptists, Evangelicals) are, in the sense that we lead our conversations with Christ’s name upon our lips. One’s devotion can take an either explicit form (via the verbiage used in interactions), or an implicit form (via actions, solitary prayer, everyday behavior), or a combination of both.

I think the OP may be witnessing the bold, *verbal *devotion of his Protestant friends and unconsciously linking it to the actual level of personal devotion - as though if the first part is lacking amongst his Catholic friends, then the second is probably lacking (or somewhat deficient) as well.

As an example of the error of mutual exclusivism, I recall one of my parish’s outings I attended a few years ago when a group of us went to a bar after Mass: We had started with some general chitchatting, then moved to discussing some recent movies we had seen. This led to a discussion of some of the morally questionable content of the films, which led to a discussion of the MPAA rating system, which led to a discussion on the limits of film censorship in the country. At no point do I remember hearing the actual name of Christ spoken, and yet we were all approaching the topic from the Christian understanding of morality and the responsibility of society in how said morality is portrayed to the masses.

Without the words “Christ”, “bible”, “commandments”, “God”, or “church” having been spoken out loud, it was still an *implicitly *Christian conversation, stemming from how we approached the topic. To an outsider’s ear, a discussion on secular movies may well have seemed a subject otherwise unrelated to religion, yet Catholic moral teaching was indeed at the heart of it because it shaped the way we analyzed the subject matter.

 

[ServusHumilis]

…at your local Latin Mass.

Shh… some of us in the know are still single!

 

[Xantippe]

H
For goodness sake, he said he’s one of the *three *men out of 20 members, so at least the odds aren’t working against him!

Yeah. That’s an important piece of information.

Catholics generally aren’t “on fire” in the same way that some Protestants (like Baptists, Evangelicals) are, in the sense that we lead our conversations with Christ’s name upon our lips. One’s devotion can take an either explicit form (via the verbiage used in interactions), or an implicit form (via actions, solitary prayer, everyday behavior), or a combination of both.

Yes.

I think the OP may be witnessing the bold, *verbal *devotion of his Protestant friends and unconsciously linking it to the actual level of personal devotion - as though if the first part is lacking amongst his Catholic friends, then the second is probably lacking (or somewhat deficient) as well.

Yes.

Without the words “Christ”, “bible”, “commandments”, “God”, or “church” having been spoken out loud, it was still an *implicitly *Christian conversation, stemming from how we approached the topic. To an outsider’s ear, a discussion on secular movies may well have seemed a subject otherwise unrelated to religion, yet Catholic moral teaching was indeed at the heart of it because it shaped the way we analyzed the subject matter.

That’s a very interesting example.

 

[Naskor]

So I go to a small college that is very liberal and has a student body that generally isn’t too interested in religion. Even though 1/3 of the student body is Catholic, only a small amount show up to weekly mass and only a handful of those people say the prayers/new translation and sing. There is a Catholic Ministry (Newman Center) on Campus but there is only 20 active people in it, me being one of only two freshman that are active in it and one of only three guys in the whole group. Although it’s nice to have a small group go to the Newman Center, the majority of the people really aren’t devout and are fine with just mass and Newman fellowship dinners. No one aside from me and two girls ever go to the confession offered after Mass, we haven’t gone on a retreat yet and I’m the only one who is pushing for more retreats, and no one even openly talks about their faith or what Christ is in their life when we have fellowship dinners at Newman, we’ll say grace and then people pretend like he doesn’t exist. I can’t be more involved in Newman, I’m already on the E-board and another leadership position, and I’m also super involved in a non-denominational Christian group on Campus that is like a youth group. The non-denom. is way more fun and although they’re pretty much all Protestant they do love Christ and have a fire for him in their hearts. Even through being involved in both organizations, I’ve yet to meet a devout girl who loves Christ AND is compatible with me. I’m not involved only to meet a girl, I do it to serve Christ, and I trust in God’s plan whatever that is. The lack of devout Christian girls is hard, I just thought that it would be easier for a devout guy to find a girl but it seems impossible. I don’t want to only limit myself to a devout Catholic girl who is an active Catholic, because if I did then I would die alone because I have met only 2 at my school. It’s disheartening and I just would like to see if there are actually young women out there who are deeply devout and love Christ. Maybe some ideas to meet other girls…

Well if you find out let me know.