Why do catholics leave the Catholic Church

[Brendan_64]

This may sound funny but I think the “gay mafia” is at work in my parish and I am thinking of leaving because of that. I am starting to believe there really is an active gay mafia out there based on what I am seeing. A very wonderful ‘orthodox’ Catholic priest is suddenly very downhearted and depressed all the time; he has always been pretty open about being conservative and supportive of Church teaching. It is obvious to me that the pastor and some other folks (musical director in particular) are bullying and ostracizing him. Atmosphere is getting very mean, lots of homilies about toleration and gay rights, I mean like three weeks in a row. Getting very clear you’re not welcome there if you don’t support gay rights. Parishioners seem uncomfortable. This one priest stands up for Church teaching and is being bullied, the pastor is aggressively against him and openly against Church teaching. What should I do? I am very uncomfortable but don’t want to leave the Church. How can you stop this if it’s really happening?

You can write to your bishop concerning the content of the homilies and the uncharitable atmosphere etc. but be aware that you are only guessing at what may be causing this priest to appear downhearted and depressed. But have you spoken to priest yourself? Maybe you should make an appointment and go and speak to him expressing your concerns about the homilies etc. and showing him that you are genuinely concerned for his well being? Speak to the priest(s) concerned before firing off a letter to the bishop.

 

[MaryT777]

This may sound funny but I think the “gay mafia” is at work in my parish and I am thinking of leaving because of that. I am starting to believe there really is an active gay mafia out there based on what I am seeing. A very wonderful ‘orthodox’ Catholic priest is suddenly very downhearted and depressed all the time; he has always been pretty open about being conservative and supportive of Church teaching. It is obvious to me that the pastor and some other folks (musical director in particular) are bullying and ostracizing him. Atmosphere is getting very mean, lots of homilies about toleration and gay rights, I mean like three weeks in a row. Getting very clear you’re not welcome there if you don’t support gay rights. Parishioners seem uncomfortable. This one priest stands up for Church teaching and is being bullied, the pastor is aggressively against him and openly against Church teaching. What should I do? I am very uncomfortable but don’t want to leave the Church. How can you stop this if it’s really happening?

I understand your dilemma. My previous parish was in a very Liberal Unitversity town. We had a gay support group in line with teaching of the Catholic Church. A member of the Parish Council
was big into gay rights and she was actively recruiting people to this ministry by
stating the Catholic Church was wrong about its teachings on homosexuality.
So…God takes care of it. After about a year of this mess she resigned a paid position in the Church at the request of a group of people who had written the Bishop. It was a lesson
in the Holy Spirit will protect the Church always until the end of the age. Sometimes
it just takes awhile.
I would write the Bishop if the Pastor is openly against Church teaching with examples;
clear concise and to the point.

 

[PJM]

=Brandall;10561049]I’ve long known that some protestants take shots at Catholics. I’ve recently found out that Catholics also take their share of shots at protestants. I’ve also found out that the main enemy of Catholics seems to be other Catholics. You’re so right about there being a lack or Christian charity in some of these posts.

Thanks,

God HAS given us much work to do on His behalf.

 

[Abrigham]

I know I’m late to the party, but I figured I’d share…

My family stopped going in the early 90s when I was very little. We were very poor with 5 kids at home and the Church we attended kept pressuring my parents that they weren’t giving the Church enough money. Also, the Priest at that Church kept inviting my older brothers to spend the night with him, which my mother refused. He was later convicted of molestation.

I know those are incidents not everyone experiences and I pray not many have experienced that, but that is when my family decided to stop attending.

 

[crazzeto]

I know I’m late to the party, but I figured I’d share…

My family stopped going in the early 90s when I was very little. We were very poor with 5 kids at home and the Church we attended kept pressuring my parents that they weren’t giving the Church enough money. Also, the Priest at that Church kept inviting my older brothers to spend the night with him, which my mother refused. He was later convicted of molestation.

I know those are incidents not everyone experiences and I pray not many have experienced that, but that is when my family decided to stop attending.

A terrible sin on the part of this fallen priest, we should pray for his soul. This happens in any faith tradtion certainly, but whereever it does occur it is the worst kind of evil. I’m so sorry your life had to include something terrible like this.

 

[PJM]

=MaryT777;10563005]I understand your dilemma. My previous parish was in a very Liberal Unitversity town. We had a gay support group in line with teaching of the Catholic Church. A member of the Parish Council
was big into gay rights and she was actively recruiting people to this ministry by
stating the Catholic Church was wrong about its teachings on homosexuality.
So…God takes care of it. After about a year of this mess she resigned a paid position in the Church at the request of a group of people who had written the Bishop. It was a lesson
in the Holy Spirit will protect the Church always until the end of the age. Sometimes
it just takes awhile.
I would write the Bishop if the Pastor is openly against Church teaching with examples;
clear concise and to the point.

FIRST, talk to your priest and get HIS SIDE of whats going on:thumbsup:

Then:

1. No threats
2. Contact the Bishop and do so

Be brief as possible

Supply facts and evidence [if its available]

Be chairtable and clear

Leave it it there for the Bishop and God to resolve

DO NOT discuss this within your community. The high possibility of Slander could exist

Keep a copy of the Letter for yoyr records

and it would be a good idea to send a COPY of your concerns to yur priest.

Mt. 5: 1-16 “Blessed are ye when they shall revile you, and persecute you, and speak all that is evil against you, untruly, for my sake: Be glad and rejoice, for your reward is very great in heaven. For so they persecuted the prophets that were before you. You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt lose its savour, wherewith shall it be salted? It is good for nothing any more but to be cast out, and to be trodden on by men. You are the light of the world. A city seated on a mountain cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle and put it under a bushel, but upon a candlestick, that it may shine to all that are in the house. So let your light shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.”

God Bless you,
pat/PJM

 

[ljwahn]

understood. and as I post here, I do seek feedback from Catholics and am not here to cause consternation. Yes, I most certainly am expressing my unhappiness because I am processing and sorting out what direction I am going in. I am glad that non Catholics are free to join this forum and I am definitely participating in the topic here on point, so I am not here with intent to offend anyone. Just making sure to say this.
I do want to add though that I know countless, and I do mean, countless Catholics who far from follow the letter of the Catholic law. I’ll give some cases in point:

1. one of the most profoundly Catholic women I know, who was a mentor to me did end up having a baby via IVF which I believe is still not permitted. I emphasize that this is a profoundly devout Catholic woman.
   Now in this issue, is conception addressed in the Bible? Where did the Church draw the rationale for the decision against IVF?
2. Numerous friends miss Mass for weeks on end and beyond for trivial reasons and yet partake in the Eucharist without having gone to confession. (I’ve seen enough weddings and funerals alone with this issue–however, I independently know people who then go to regular Mass and do so, telling me that well, it’s still ultimately God forgiving them when they ask Him)

Nora, we are all sinners, certainly myself included, but one can not judge the church based on the people in the church. The church will still be Catholic even if every member is sinful. That will never change. When it comes down to it, your relationship with God is what keeps you going to church or causes you to stop, not the others in the church who may do sinful things. King David sent Uriah to the front lines to be killed so he could have his wife. We all fail at times.

 

[PRmerger]

Nora, we are all sinners, certainly myself included, but one can not judge the church based on the people in the church. The church will still be Catholic even if every member is sinful. That will never change. When it comes down to it, your relationship with God is what keeps you going to church or causes you to stop, not the others in the church who may do sinful things. King David sent Uriah to the front lines to be killed so he could have his wife. We all fail at times.

Welcome to the CAFs, ljwahn! And wonderful insights you posted here!

 

[ljwahn]

Welcome to the CAFs, ljwahn! And wonderful insights you posted here!

Thank you. I hope I can add to some discussions.

 

[Annabelle_Marie]

Can I just point out that now is a wonderful time to consider journeying back to the Church. We all have renewed our baptizmal promises and it’s a new beginning for many.

And you won’t have to deal with those of us who gave up coffee for Lent and were grouchy…

 

[Tigg]

as I post here, I do seek feedback from Catholics and am not here to cause consternation. Yes, I most certainly am expressing my unhappiness because I am processing and sorting out what direction I am going in.

I do want to add though that I know countless, and I do mean, countless Catholics who far from follow the letter of the Catholic law. I’ll give some cases in point:

1. one of the most profoundly Catholic women I know, who was a mentor to me did end up having a baby via IVF which I believe is still not permitted. I emphasize that this is a profoundly devout Catholic woman.
   Now in this issue, is conception addressed in the Bible? Where did the Church draw the rationale for the decision against IVF?
2. Numerous friends miss Mass for weeks on end and beyond for trivial reasons and yet partake in the Eucharist without having gone to confession. (I’ve seen enough weddings and funerals alone with this issue–however, I independently know people who then go to regular Mass and do so, telling me that well, it’s still ultimately God forgiving them when they ask Him)

This is the reason for focusing not on others, but only on the Divine. Our personal faith life is an intimate journey with Christ from which others are excluded. We cannot love what we do not know and when we are sincerely seeking Christ He reveals Himself to us. Oddly enough, this creates an honesty about ourselves - to ourselves. It becomes harder and harder to live under self-delusion and with grace, we can finally submit to Christ, Who is Truth. That’s why I believe that Catholics who leave the Church in reality, have lost their faith.

 

[PJM]

Originally Posted by nora_b 
understood. and as I post here, I do seek feedback from Catholics and am not here to cause consternation. Yes, I most certainly am expressing my unhappiness because I am processing and sorting out what direction I am going in. I am glad that non Catholics are free to join this forum and I am definitely participating in the topic here on point, so I am not here with intent to offend anyone. Just making sure to say this.

I do want to add though that I know countless, and I do mean, countless Catholics who far from follow the letter of the Catholic law. I’ll give some cases in point:

1. one of the most profoundly Catholic women I know, who was a mentor to me did end up having a baby via IVF which I believe is still not permitted. I emphasize that this is a profoundly devout Catholic woman.

What we don’t know is if she did this on her “own” or MAY have received bad and improper advice. God’s Grace ONLY prevents sin when we accept it and apply it. Grace is and can be ignored. upability [Gods imputed degree of actual guilt] factors in ALL issues.

Indeed IVF is not supported by the CC. From the Bishops web site:
http://old.usccb.org/prolife/programs/rlp/98rlphaa.shtml

“In IVF, children are engendered through a technical process, subjected to “quality control,” and eliminated if found “defective.”

Infertility is a growing problem in the United States. And in true American fashion, there has been a corresponding growth in a “reproductive technologies industry” to provide a solution.

It is quite legitimate, indeed praiseworthy, to try to find ways to overcome infertility. The problem causes great pain and anguish for many married couples. Since children are a wonderful gift of marriage, it is a good thing to try to overcome the obstacles which prevent children from being conceived and born. “

IF I’m reading this correctly the problem here is insistence on perfectly healthy babies. Even in IVF, God is the determining factor. Here science is usurping God’s exclusive rights to control all matters regarding birth ISSUES.

Now in this issue, is conception addressed in the Bible? Where did the Church draw the rationale for the decision against IVF?

We CAN know God controls birth issues because not every sexual unprotected act results in a pregnancy. Fertile periods are well documents and God’s manner to control birth.

**Genesis 4:1 **The man had intercourse with his wife Eve, and she conceived and gave birth to Cain. ‘I have acquired a man with the help of Yahweh,’ she said.

Birth is Controlled by God
John.1 Verses 12 to 14: “But to all who received him, who believed in his name, he gave power to become children of God; who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God. “

Gen.38: 6-10 “And Judah took a wife for Er his first-born, and her name was Tamar. But Er, Judah’s first-born, was wicked in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD slew him. Then Judah [the Father of both sons] said to Onan, “Go in to your brother’s wife, and perform the duty of a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother.” But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother’s wife he spilled the semen on the ground, lest he should give offspring to his brother. And what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD, and he slew him also.

1. Numerous friends miss Mass for weeks on end and beyond for trivial reasons and yet partake in the Eucharist without having gone to confession. (I’ve seen enough weddings and funerals alone with this issue–however, I independently know people who then go to regular Mass and do so, telling me that well, it’s still ultimately God forgiving them when they ask Him

Yes BUT! **
1. It must be done through the Catholic Sacrament of Confession Jn.20:19-2**

1. Confession is conditional on: TRUE repentance; a Firm commitment w/ Gods grace to not repeat the sin again and a sincere commitment to do so. If one lies to the priest; even though the words of Absolution are given; the Confession is invalid, and the sin remain unforgiven. They are not mind readers.
   

**There are more than a BILLION Catholics world-wide. To differing degrees every one of them “is a sinner” 1 Jn.1:8-10, 1 Jn.5:16-17 **

Mt 7:21-22
Not every one that saith to me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven: but he that doth the will of my Father who is in heaven, Many will say to me in that day: Lord, Lord, have not we prophesied in thy name, and cast out devils in thy name, and done many miracles in thy name?

God will, because God MUST judge us on what He makes possible for us to know. Not what we choose to believe. There is very much more but space is limited.

We KNOW as dos God that there are MANY “bad, not-practicing” catholics. Every election proves it in the number of self-professed catholics who support by their action abortion candidates

God bless you,
pat/PJM

 

[PJM]

=Annabelle Marie;10564037]Can I just point out that now is a wonderful time to consider journeying back to the Church. We all have renewed our baptizmal promises and it’s a new beginning for many.

And you won’t have to deal with those of us who gave up coffee for Lent and were grouchy…

I’ll share a secret If you promise not to tell

I tried that several years ago and it WAS made evident to me that it WAS harder on others than it wwas me. “FIND SOMETHING ELSE!”

I like my coffee [a pot a day] black and sweet!

I now drink it black **W/O sweetner **in Lent. It’s not only a better way; I am remined with every sip what I’m doing and why. And I’m not grouchy either.

 

[bobbywilson]

What we don’t know is if she did this on her “own” or MAY have received bad and improper advice. God’s Grace ONLY prevents sin when we accept it and apply it. Grace is and can be ignored. upability [Gods imputed degree of actual guilt] factors in ALL issues.

Birth is Controlled by God
John.1 Verses 12 to 14: “But to all who received him, who believed in his name, he gave power to become children of God; who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God. “

Yes BUT! **
1. It must be done through the Catholic Sacrament of Confession Jn.20:19-2**

1. Confession is conditional on: TRUE repentance; a Firm commitment w/ Gods grace to not repeat the sin again and a sincere commitment to do so. If one lies to the priest; even though the words of Absolution are given; the Confession is invalid, and the sin remain unforgiven. They are not mind readers.
   

**There are more than a BILLION Catholics world-wide. To differing degrees every one of them “is a sinner” 1 Jn.1:8-10, 1 Jn.5:16-17 **

Mt 7:21-22
Not every one that saith to me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven: but he that doth the will of my Father who is in heaven, Many will say to me in that day: Lord, Lord, have not we prophesied in thy name, and cast out devils in thy name, and done many miracles in thy name?

God will, because God MUST judge us on what He makes possible for us to know. Not what we choose to believe. There is very much more but space is limited.

We KNOW as dos God that there are MANY “bad, not-practicing” catholics.

All those who do the will of the father YAWAH or as Jesus said his commands are not grevious.

and as Solomon, demonstrated -
he kept some of the laws of the TORAH and others he disregarded- he had the Wisdom of the Holy Spirit proverbs ch 1-ch4,

Grace is the Wisdom of the Holy Spirit- have catholics been taught to understand the voice of the Holy Spirit the “Bible way”
that is the confusing part for most catholics i have known

 

[RNKAY]

Ouch!

Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone. Double ouch.

 

[J_the_Centrist]

I can think of three reasons indoctrination, gullibility (to accept propaganda), and rebellion (in the adolescent sense). These may not adequately describe everyone who leaves, but based on those I know and those in the media (Bill Maher, Lawrence O’Donnell, etc.), these represent the bulk of why most leave, in my humble opinion.

 

[Brendan_64]

I think the reason Catholics leave the Church is because of the constant pressure and propaganda from secular society concerning sex, materialism, and individualism. Secular society is waging war against religion, and at the moment (in the West anyway) secular society is winning. It is a battle for souls, with Satan using secular society as a tool to try to achieve his ends.

 

[ljwahn]

I think the reason Catholics leave the Church is because of the constant pressure and propaganda from secular society concerning sex, materialism, and individualism. Secular society is waging war against religion, and at the moment (in the West anyway) secular society is winning. It is a battle for souls, with Satan using secular society as a tool to try to achieve his ends.

Well Said, Brendan.

 

[PJM]

=ljwahn;10599728]Well Said, Brendan.

The Deamon is the Father of Lies.

Prideful secular MEISM… others only count IF and WHEN they agree with ME:shrug:

 

[ExCatholicGuy]

I can think of three reasons indoctrination, gullibility (to accept propaganda), and rebellion (in the adolescent sense). These may not adequately describe everyone who leaves, but based on those I know and those in the media (Bill Maher, Lawrence O’Donnell, etc.), these represent the bulk of why most leave, in my humble opinion.

I simply realized that I did not believe the fundamental tenets of Catholicism, nor those of Christianity.