Why do converts hate their former faiths so passionately?

[Marybeloved]

I’ve encountered ex-Catholics that hate the Church with a passion, I’m sure the same thing can be attested in other faiths to a lesser or greater extent. I’m not a convert myself, (at least not from another faith, but from a life of indifference) so I don’t really understand this phenomenon well.

Why?

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

The feeling that your parents/family lied to you and/or didn’t let you choose your faith but instead forced it upon you.

The INSANE amount of pressure that is brought to bear to bring you back into the fold. E.G., “come back to the old faith or we will disown you”, etc.

Those two off the top of my head.

 

[Tomek]

I’ve encountered ex-Catholics that hate the Church with a passion, I’m sure the same thing can be attested in other faiths to a lesser or greater extent. I’m not a convert myself, (at least not from another faith, but from a life of indifference) so I don’t really understand this phenomenon well.

Why?

Usually it’s due to some bad personal experience. Catholicism in itself is a very smart, beautiful, and joyful faith.

 

[PbloPicasso]

I’ve encountered ex-Catholics that hate the Church with a passion, I’m sure the same thing can be attested in other faiths to a lesser or greater extent. I’m not a convert myself, (at least not from another faith, but from a life of indifference) so I don’t really understand this phenomenon well.

Why?

Well, when you wake up and discover a priest’s hand down your pants, it sort of spoils the joy out of ones faith. Then try to have something just done about it and you find yourself marginalized, even accused of inviting the unwanted advances, and the knife cuts even deeper. Then you add… The point is, friend, that even in the Catholic Church, evil lurks and waits to hurt people within. The same is true in other faiths. As beautiful as the faith is, not everyone fulfills their vocation. Arrogance the hierarchy, as well as the laity, prevents people from reaching holiness and the joys that come along with it. Maybe you’ve been fortunate so far. I hated Catholicism much of my life for what I thought it taught. I sought truth.

 

[Trevor_Stamm]

I’ve encountered ex-Catholics that hate the Church with a passion, I’m sure the same thing can be attested in other faiths to a lesser or greater extent. I’m not a convert myself, (at least not from another faith, but from a life of indifference) so I don’t really understand this phenomenon well.

Why?

I wouldn’t say hate; it’s more of an internal hurt. Time wasted, robbed and never to be redeemed away from the truth while it was in front of us all that time, has a deepening effect on the convert. You can imagine how some converts feel about those who were doing the stealing. We forgive and love them but that pain of remembering all that unredeemable time away from Christ in His one true Church is a bit much at sometimes.

 

[Tietjen]

I’ve encountered ex-Catholics that hate the Church with a passion, I’m sure the same thing can be attested in other faiths to a lesser or greater extent. I’m not a convert myself, (at least not from another faith, but from a life of indifference) so I don’t really understand this phenomenon well.

Why?

“Hate” is a strong term and may be true for some, but I believe that the majority simply “prefer” the newly discovered religion. Those few who actually do have “hate” do so, I believe, because of pride. The new convert believes he/she has been brought into THE truth (knowledge of which Church is God’s Church) and believes that any other Church that makes this claim is lying. They take it upon themselves to single-handedly discredit the opposition in the name of holiness and for the glory of God (though, inwardly they themselves enjoy being the tool used by God to attack their former Church). They see themselves as having the “inside scoop” of the former religion and enjoy the attention of being the ones that can inform their new Church of all the dirty secrets (even those that aren’t true). It gives them a certain authority on the subject and they enjoy being in that position. It’s really a sad thing.

 

[Marybeloved]

“Hate” is a strong term and may be true for some, but I believe that the majority simply “prefer” the newly discovered religion. Those few who actually do have “hate” do so, I believe, because of pride. The new convert believes he/she has been brought into THE truth (knowledge of which Church is God’s Church) and believes that any other Church that makes this claim is lying. They take it upon themselves to single-handedly discredit the opposition in the name of holiness and for the glory of God (though, inwardly they themselves enjoy being the tool used by God to attack their former Church). They see themselves as having the “inside scoop” of the former religion and enjoy the attention of being the ones that can inform their new Church of all the dirty secrets (even those that aren’t true). It gives them a certain authority on the subject and they enjoy being in that position. It’s really a sad thing.

I think you hit the nail squarely on its head, my friend. I’ve met quite a few of these online.

-I think that some anti-Catholic ex-Catholics also feel the need to justify leaving the Catholic church to themselves, especially those who ever held to the belief that she’s the one true church and then left, for whatever reason, w/out 100% conviction that she’s not. They took a leap and probably feel the need to justify their choice.

-I guess it’s also true what the other posters say- Some bad experiences, injustice, disappointment, misinformation, can also make one resentful or even bitter about their former religion or faith.

 

[Khalid]

For me, because Islam is most definitely objectively evil in its current incarnation.

Other people may be reacting against falsehood and lies even if the doctrine doesn’t have evil consequences for this world, but only for the next one, rooted in an innate love of truth, the finding of the light of the world. Some, experiencing this, curse the darkness instead of lighting a candle. Some do both, lest we forget the darkness is there or grow accustomed to it.

To lapse into Calvinist or Augustinian terminology, those who leave the truth for the darkness, the reprobate, feel doubly much the need to curse the light which they have abandoned, either out of pride, or envy, or hatred, or a con-fusion of the three, so that they might wander blindly while yelling, “I can see”, freezing to death while claiming they’re on fire, lest they find themselves pulled back towards the light, where they might refresh their eyes and warm themselves. Or those with such a great concupiscence that they leave the light so that they might sin, as an attempt to rationalize sinning and hold repentance and contrition at bay.

Those who journey out of light and into darkness often do so for subjective or emotional reasons, not an actual, rational inquiry and subsequent decision (some step into the darkness on their path to forming their knowledge and a rational warrant for belief in the light; some never even know what the light is, being shown only a caricature of it: I digress, as the very rational inquiry I am talking about precludes the caricature being the only knowledge had): rational inquiry in the sphere of religion leads always to Christianity, and eventually to Catholicism, if taken to its ultimate conclusion, but people may give up the search at any point on the path, either tired of the work and inability to commit, or thinking that once they have seen a spark, they are next to the source of light. This is one of the reasons that fideism is so dangerous, and is used by the Devil with such effect: those who are too proud or too lazy either stay in the religion they were raised in with no questions (whether it be true or not, they never learn), or join with whatever is popular at the given hour - today this is the pop-culture, unlearned militant atheism of scientists like Richard Dawkins and second-rate philosophers like Daniel Dennet - for a ready-made set of easy answers without the need to challenge their preconceived, received system of thinking, nor that dominant at the current time in their society.

 

[JustaServant]

Before reverted I used to say (Lord forgive me) 'I could never return to the Catholic Church because I “know too much”(about the Bible and what the Catholic Church is REALLY all about). Youth and ignorance tend to hand and hand. And proving that God has a delightful sense of humor He showed me how much I actually DID NOT KNOW.
I associated the Catholic Church with everything wrong in my life. I need assurance, and I felt at the time the Catholic Church could not give me that assurance. I walked away from the Catholic Church, not because of doctrine, which I knew nothing about, but because of personal reasons.
I was angry and disgusted with them. It felt good to run away, to be free. I was not really anti-Catholic when I left the Church. Nor did I leave for any heavy doctrinal reason, I left for emotional ones.
In fundamentalism I learned the Catholic Church murdered millions of people and the true church was the Baptist. The Catholic Church was “the whore of Babylon” predicted in Revelation 17. The Papacy was the “seat of Antichrist” and was in fact the ancient Babylonian mystery religion.
With each passing day, my grudge against the Catholic Church was edging toward genuine hatred as I read anti-Catholic writings.
Generally you find people, of any group, are haters because they cannot intellectually or spiritually overcome an emotional response. They are satisfied not questioning the status quo. Once one starts questioning, the claws and fangs come out and they act, quite frankly, unchristian.
It’s easy to throw out meaningless and uneducated statements like: ‘the Pope is the antichrist!! The RCC is the great whore!!’. It arouses the emotions of the crowd and they scream AMEN!! without ever questioning the statement. Sadder still is finding Bible verses to ‘justify’ the hate. Claiming we are ‘commanded’ to hate.
Hate is spawned out of fear. You hate and fear what you know or think you know.
When a “religion” is based on hate and fear it is not a true religion. When it’s about more what you are against, than what you are for, it is not a true religion.
Some are born into the Catholic Church and thus have no “choice”. There was a beauty in this. I was born Catholic, never really had a choice. Now as an adult Christian, I was making the CHOICE to be Catholic.
“When you’re seven years old and you run away from home, it’s a lot of fun at 12 noon. But by 6pm it’s not fun anymore, you want to return home.”

 

[Khalid]

I associated the Catholic Church with everything wrong in my life. I need assurance, and I felt at the time the Catholic Church could not give me that assurance. I walked away from the Catholic Church, not because of doctrine, which I knew nothing about, but because of personal reasons.

I was angry and disgusted with them. It felt good to run away, to be free. I was not really anti-Catholic when I left the Church. Nor did I leave for any heavy doctrinal reason, I left for emotional ones.

Generally you find people, of any group, are haters because they cannot intellectually or spiritually overcome an emotional response. They are satisfied not questioning the status quo. Once one starts questioning, the claws and fangs come out and they act, quite frankly, unchristian.

The very point I was making so immediately and vividly illustrated. Almost a point-by-point affirmation (are we reaching a consensus on why converts hate their religions? one person attempting to attack it in a systematic manner, one sharing his own experience, both conclude similarly) of the points I made, contained in a post which, I must admit upon reading it, contains several well-turned metaphors and is much more poetic than I intended it to be. At this rate, I’ll be one of those people you’ve never heard of in one of the “Quotes for Every Occasion” books.

 

[CopticChristian]

I’ve encountered ex-Catholics that hate the Church with a passion, I’m sure the same thing can be attested in other faiths to a lesser or greater extent. I’m not a convert myself, (at least not from another faith, but from a life of indifference) so I don’t really understand this phenomenon well.

Why?

When you encounter Protestants that become Catholic you see a mix, some that believe that they were decieved by Protestant thought and others that look back with fondness.

When you encounter people of any type there is no understanding who and what they are. No one person experiences Joy, Sadness, Anger, Fear, and the emotions in exactly the same way. No one person handles their emotions in the same way.

When you deal with people some anger easier than others and some don’t. Some have more understanding than others and some don’t. There is no way to measure the degree of response that people have. What is clear is that those that are angry are not experiencing joy…Why…only they know.

What is clear is that if there are those that are filled with anger about something then it is clear that they in themselves have internal conflict that is unresolved. It may be the Church as an authority or not. Whatever the problem the Church serves as a substitute to express their internal conflict. This is sad because while they believe they have found something maintaining that anger means they have not.

Take any situation where anger and sadness are caused. Death, Divorce, loss of Job. There are those that allow the anger to pass, forgive and finally experience joy. What you are seeing here are people that have difficulty with forgiveness and that too is sad.

This is sometimes about accountability blaming and being angry at others for the choices they make. You have heard it…“if it weren’t for so and so then I would not have this problem” a clear sign of immaturity, adolescent thought and inability to take responsibility. It is easy to blame and hard to take responsibility. This is an immature mind and it may well be that the minds you are dealing with have not matured.

There is no one answer to your question. What would be important to ask is not Why are you angry, rather to ask What makes you angry and How can you change it.

 

[puzzleannie]

I’ve encountered ex-Catholics that hate the Church with a passion, I’m sure the same thing can be attested in other faiths to a lesser or greater extent. I’m not a convert myself, (at least not from another faith, but from a life of indifference) so I don’t really understand this phenomenon well.

Why?

I have not experienced this with converts to Catholicism in my RCIA expreience. most are extremely grateful for the faith formation, love for scripture, fellowship and other benefits they received from their former faith family. The only people who have exhibited not hatred but deep feelings of betrayal are Mormons and JWs who feel they were totally and at times maliciously misled, that that is only a few people.

 

[GaryTaylor]

Truth is I haven’t witnessed this in real life but to a small scale. I have witnessed more Christians convert to the CC with a deep respect still of their prior Christian Faith.

When I think of those whom fell away from Christianity all together, it seems to me to be a completely different reality which becomes very much of this physical world. A simple case of refusing to follow the Ten Commandments for whatever personal reason they may have. None usually good.

Peace

 

[1ke]

This is certainly not the case universally. I think it is a big generalization. Many who “hate” their former religion do so for personal reasons.

 

[Marybeloved]

I have not experienced this with converts to Catholicism in my RCIA expreience. most are extremely grateful for the faith formation, love for scripture, fellowship and other benefits they received from their former faith family.

Truth is I haven’t witnessed this in real life but to a small scale. I have witnessed more Christians convert to the CC with a deep respect still of their prior Christian Faith.

This is true. I’ve seen this respect/appreciation you both speak of in many conversion stories to the Church from other Christian groups. You can tell they were not running from anything when they came to the Church- rather, its almost like they were “compelled” to come but would have happily remained in their respective faiths had they not stumbled onto truth. Those kinds of stories are always so much better than angry ones.

 

[CalChristian]

I’ve encountered ex-Catholics that hate the Church with a passion, I’m sure the same thing can be attested in other faiths to a lesser or greater extent. I’m not a convert myself, (at least not from another faith, but from a life of indifference) so I don’t really understand this phenomenon well.

Why?

Those that have changed denominations because of theology CAN be rather passionate.
After all, they regard churches as accountable and potentially wrong (all of them, including the CC).

My Protestant congregation is about half former Catholic, including the pastor (and me). But I’ve NEVER - not once - heard a disparaging word or comment about the CC (or any comment AT ALL about it in the sermons or official publications). My OWN feeling is that I’m profoundly grateful for my time in your denomination and for the MANY blessings I received there - I have nothing but gratitude for that. I regard your denomination as sound and valid, and I hold it in considerable esteem. I regard all in Her as my FULL, entirely unseparated, equal and equally blessed brothers and sisters in Christ. I regard all Her ministers and ministries as fully valid, I regard Her Sacraments as fully valid. I pray daily for God’s rich, abundant blessings to Her, Her ministers and ministries and Her Holy Father. Yes - I know none of this is mutual (which just makes Catholics more “anti” than I am, lol) but none of that bothers me personally. Of course, there are a couple of things
I disagree with in Catholicism (or I’d still be there) but they do NOT cause me - in any sense - to question their Christianity or salvation or my spiritual unity with them.

.

 

[fred_conty]

For me, because Islam is most definitely objectively evil in its current incarnation.

Other people may be reacting against falsehood and lies even if the doctrine doesn’t have evil consequences for this world, but only for the next one, rooted in an innate love of truth, the finding of the light of the world. Some, experiencing this, curse the darkness instead of lighting a candle. Some do both, lest we forget the darkness is there or grow accustomed to it.

To lapse into Calvinist or Augustinian terminology, those who leave the truth for the darkness, the reprobate, feel doubly much the need to curse the light which they have abandoned, either out of pride, or envy, or hatred, or a con-fusion of the three, so that they might wander blindly while yelling, “I can see”, freezing to death while claiming they’re on fire, lest they find themselves pulled back towards the light, where they might refresh their eyes and warm themselves. Or those with such a great concupiscence that they leave the light so that they might sin, as an attempt to rationalize sinning and hold repentance and contrition at bay.

Those who journey out of light and into darkness often do so for subjective or emotional reasons, not an actual, rational inquiry and subsequent decision (some step into the darkness on their path to forming their knowledge and a rational warrant for belief in the light; some never even know what the light is, being shown only a caricature of it: I digress, as the very rational inquiry I am talking about precludes the caricature being the only knowledge had): rational inquiry in the sphere of religion leads always to Christianity, and eventually to Catholicism, if taken to its ultimate conclusion, but people may give up the search at any point on the path, either tired of the work and inability to commit, or thinking that once they have seen a spark, they are next to the source of light. This is one of the reasons that fideism is so dangerous, and is used by the Devil with such effect: those who are too proud or too lazy either stay in the religion they were raised in with no questions (whether it be true or not, they never learn), or join with whatever is popular at the given hour - today this is the pop-culture, unlearned militant atheism of scientists like Richard Dawkins and second-rate philosophers like Daniel Dennet - for a ready-made set of easy answers without the need to challenge their preconceived, received system of thinking, nor that dominant at the current time in their society.

That explaination was very good. If I had to pick one, it would be that people’s feelings get
hurt by another person of the faith. I heard quite a few blame it on the nuns they had.
Well I had them and I thought they were great. But everyone is different.

 

[CopticChristian]

Those that have changed denominations because of theology CAN be rather passionate.
After all, they regard churches as accountable and potentially wrong (all of them, including the CC).

 

[CalChristian]

CalChristian;8555230:

The Catholic Church is not a denomination. Denominations are a Protestant phenomenon. All Ecclesial communities that call themselves Christian denominated from the source, the OHCAC. Thank you.

I’m not sure what your desire is in constantly stressing that The Catholic Church has no organization, no authority, no common faith, no common name and no parishes - but whatever that point is, it’s irrelevant to what I posted and IMO is in no sense a reply.

Yes, all denominations are associations of congregations, which in turn are associations of Christians. They all come from that - Christians. Now, I have no clue what in the world that has to do with anything I posted.

Here it is again. IF it helps you, you may (in your reading) replace “denomination” with the any of the following…

From religioustolerance.com
Denomination: an established religious group, typically uniting a group of individual, local congregations into a single administrative body.

From thefreedictionary.com
Denomination: . A large group of religious congregations united under a common faith and name and organized under a single administrative and legal hierarchy.

From onlinedictionary.com
Denomination: a group of religious congregations having its own organization and often a distinctive faith

From Allwords.com
Denomination: a group of religious congregations having its own organization and a distinctive faith

I mean the word with these definitions, as you well know. Read the post with these meanings of that word. Then, IF you want to discuss the POST, I welcome that, my brother.

Those that have changed denominations because of theology CAN be rather passionate.
After all, they regard churches as accountable and potentially wrong (all of them, including the CC).

My Protestant congregation is about half former Catholic, including the pastor (and me). But I’ve NEVER - not once - heard a disparaging word or comment about the CC (or any comment AT ALL about it in the sermons or official publications). My OWN feeling is that I’m profoundly grateful for my time in your denomination and for the MANY blessings I received there - I have nothing but gratitude for that. I regard your denomination as sound and valid, and I hold it in considerable esteem. I regard all in Her as my FULL, entirely unseparated, equal and equally blessed brothers and sisters in Christ. I regard all Her ministers and ministries as fully valid, I regard Her Sacraments as fully valid. I pray daily for God’s rich, abundant blessings to Her, Her ministers and ministries and Her Holy Father. Yes - I know none of this is mutual (which just makes Catholics more “anti” than I am, lol) but none of that bothers me personally. Of course, there are a couple of things
I disagree with in Catholicism (or I’d still be there) but they do NOT cause me - in any sense - to question their Christianity or salvation or my spiritual unity with them.

.

 

[CopticChristian]

CopticChristian;8555479:

I’m not sure what your desire is in constantly stressing that The Catholic Church has no organization, no authority, no common faith, no common name and no parishes - but whatever that point is, it’s irrelevant to what I posted and IMO is in no sense a reply.

Yes, all denominations are associations of congregations, which in turn are associations of Christians. They all come from that - Christians. Now, I have no clue what in the world that has to do with anything I posted.

Here it is again. IF it helps you, you may (in your reading) replace “denomination” with the any of the following…

**
From religioustolerance.com**

Denomination: an established religious group, typically uniting a group of individual, local congregations into a single administrative body.

**
From thefreedictionary.com**Denomination: . A large group of religious congregations united under a common faith and name and organized under a single administrative and legal hierarchy.

From onlinedictionary.comDenomination: a group of religious congregations having its own organization and often a distinctive faith

From Allwords.comDenomination: a group of religious congregations having its own organization and a distinctive faith

I mean the word with these definitions, as you well know. Read the post with these meanings of that word. Then, IF you want to discuss the POST, I welcome that, my brother.

.

The Church came before the Bible. The Bible was birthed by the Church. The Church and the Bible came before those above in red. These are outside sources that I can accept or reject. You choose to accept and I choose to reject. I am not obligated by definitions.

eu·tha·na·sia noun \ˌyü-thə-ˈnā-zh(ē-)ə\

Definition of EUTHANASIA
: the act or practice of killing or permitting the death of hopelessly sick or injured individuals (as persons or domestic animals) in a relatively painless way for reasons of mercy

Euthanasia is murder according to the Bible and My Church. I do not have to abide by this definition. It would appear that since you find sources outside the Bible and teachings of the Church you would call Euthanasia mercy killing and it is OK.

Use outside sources that satisfy your mind. How do you decide which definitions you choose to adhere to and which you do not? I want to know. These are lessons that I will pass on to my children. I believe in absolutes. Your method needs explaining.