Why do old people talk so much before Mass?

[turtle18]

There has been a lot of talk on the forums about children/babies making too much noise during Mass. But what about all the old people who think Church is social hour? I go to several different churches and the old folks regularly talk up until Mass starts. They have no respect for people trying to pray silently and seems they are being irreverant.

 

[Cat]

Are you old?

I’m 50, BTW, so I’m almost there.

 

[mommyof4]

I’m 42. Does that count as “old?”

 

[Meximo]

At my church most of the “old” people are those who are praying while the youngsters (25 to 45) are our socialites. I guess for some people this is their social hour.

My husband and I are in our 30s we are pretty quiet

 

[Wolseley]

I’m old (47 next month), and I wish they’d all shut up—old people, young people, cantors, announcers, “liturgical musicians”, the whole pack of them.

The inside of a church is God’s house, not the floor of the stock exchange. Everybody entering one needs to shut up and show some respect for the Blessed Sacrament.

 

[awalt]

It is the community of Christ, after all. We are supposed to be there for each other, supporting each other, etc. While I certainly agree to respect the desire of those that pray, I can understand others being very happy to see each other - many times they have lived through great sorrows and difficult times spiritually and physically. Maybe there is a point a little more Christian than telling them to shut up that could still accomplish creating an aura of holiness in the Church, I doubt Jesus would do that…

 

[heathernoel]

Perhaps it’s just my perspective as a candidate, but I always feel His presence in the Church. I go to Church an hour before Mass to pray the rosary and spend tme with Him in His house. It’s quite a distraction to hear anyone…young or old, talking and laughing it up at the exits. I don’t allow my children to talk until we are down the steps.

It’s annoying and disrespectful to those around you, but I also figure that the ‘older’ folks at church have a right to do as they please, so I pray that much harder to block out their noises.

 

[sphilomena]

Let’s just say that I am older than those of you who have given their ages, and I have exactly the same question! It seems that the older folks are the ones who should know better, given the reverence that we were used to growing up. To me it shows the result of moving tabernacles, doing away with the solemnity at Mass, etc. Then there are the churches that look and feel like secular buildings. There isn’t the mystery we used to have. There are two groups of us who are older, though. Some of us have either had a spiritual “awakening” or never lost the reverence, and others have forgotten, IMHO.

 

[ricmat]

I see old people (of which I’m probably considered one) talk before mass, after mass, and during communion when passing somebody on the aisle. Handshakes, pats on the back, queries about health, hugs, weeping…

My theory is that they think that perhaps this is the last time they will ever see this person (alive).

Note: they may be right.

 

[turtle18]

I have never told anyone to “shut up” before or after Mass. Where is there Christian charity in trying to respect their brothers & sisters who want to pray in reverant silence?
By the way you youngsters, when I say old, these people are usually 65+

 

[Katie1723]

I’m old (47 next month), and I wish they’d all shut up—old people, young people, cantors, announcers, “liturgical musicians”, the whole pack of them.

The inside of a church is God’s house, not the floor of the stock exchange. Everybody entering one needs to shut up and show some respect for the Blessed Sacrament.

Kathy

 

[IrishAm]

I’m old (47 next month), and I wish they’d all shut up—old people, young people, cantors, announcers, “liturgical musicians”, the whole pack of them.

By the way you youngsters, when I say old, these people are usually 65+

Halleluia! I’m still under the bar . . .

 

[Sarabande]

There has been a lot of talk on the forums about children/babies making too much noise during Mass. But what about all the old people who think Church is social hour? I go to several different churches and the old folks regularly talk up until Mass starts. They have no respect for people trying to pray silently and seems they are being irreverant.

Those old people are not just like that in church. They are like that all over the place - at the movies, concerts, on the train when everyone else is speaking with their indoor voices, etc. I get a kick out of sitting in front of two or more old females and hear all about their colonoscopies, problems with their bodily functions and the like. Or complaining about how boisterous and disrespectful younger people are. Or just really mundane, uninteresting topics in general. Oh, well… I guess I’ll be the same way when I’m old too. hahahaha!

Actually, I don’t think there are more older people who talk before mass. There are people of every generation who are like this. It’s just that I think we notice them more because they tend to have bad hearing and will speak much louder. They think they are whispering. My grandmother is a perfect example - not during mass because she is well-behaved prior to mass and during mass. But in general when we’re somewhere that requires soft speaking, she’ll talk really loud. Or when she’ll point out someone that she thinks is dressed “weird”, or have tons of piercings etc., she’ll think she’s whispering, but will say it so loudly that the person she’s pointing out can hear her. Other people of other generations tend to me more discreet about it, although you do get the loud ones too.

 

[Wolseley]

It is the community of Christ, after all. We are supposed to be there for each other, supporting each other, etc.

Vertical trumps horizontal.

While I certainly agree to respect the desire of those that pray, I can understand others being very happy to see each other - many times they have lived through great sorrows and difficult times spiritually and physically.

And there’s a place for them to talk about it. It’s called the parish hall, not the sanctuary.

Maybe there is a point a little more Christian than telling them to shut up that could still accomplish creating an aura of holiness in the Church, I doubt Jesus would do that…

You’re right. He used to do stuff like make whips and drive disrespectful people out of the temple. I’m not that radical.

 

[baltobetsy]

I frequent two churches. The Cathedral is pretty much silent all the time, before both daily and Saturday/Sunday Masses. There’s a bit more socializing after Mass, what with the priest greeting the people as they leave and all, but you can still go into the Blessed Sacrament Chapel and pray in peace after Mass.

In my home parish, I sometimes notice the old people (and there are plenty, as I only go to the Saturday 4 pm “geezer” Mass) chattering and sometimes not. Sometimes it is very loud. Recently, it has been quieter. One of the priests spoke in a homily about how he admires the reverence of the people in the parish and how they are quietly praying in the presence of God. I think he very wisely approached the subject of the chatter this way instead of correcting the folks. They all lived up to the compliment instead of getting angry and even louder.

Betsy

 

[puzzleannie]

answering just the thread title, and observing OP is correct in my experience, they are responsible for a lot of the talking and commotion, some guesses:
some of them live alone most of the time and before, during and after Mass is the social high point of their day or week.
some are deaf and what they think is a whispered conversation is actually carried out in ringing tones
some may actually be lost or confused and really need to ask a question
some are of the generation (yes, mine, the one that lived through the ravaging changes of the 60s and 70s, we are the oldies but goodies now) that witnessed and even embraced the stream of liturgical practice that went “we are building community, welcoming, we are not solemn solitary adorers” and have been industriously adhering to what they were taught in those years.

 

[Cat]

answering just the thread title, and observing OP is correct in my experience, they are responsible for a lot of the talking and commotion, some guesses:
some of them live alone most of the time and before, during and after Mass is the social high point of their day or week.
some are deaf and what they think is a whispered conversation is actually carried out in ringing tones
some may actually be lost or confused and really need to ask a question
some are of the generation (yes, mine, the one that lived through the ravaging changes of the 60s and 70s, we are the oldies but goodies now) that witnessed and even embraced the stream of liturgical practice that went “we are building community, welcoming, we are not solemn solitary adorers” and have been industriously adhering to what they were taught in those years.

This is such a wonderful, charitable post.

I think the Number One reason why old people chat is that they are lonely during the week and Mass is truly the high point of their week.

For gosh sakes, everyone, show a little charity for these old ones who have kept our churches going. They are the salt of the earth.

 

[CatholicCajun]

I think it’s “funny” that the same behavior that we got pinched in church for as children is now the behavior incorporated by the ones who did the pinching!!

 

[harleymonk]

Thank you Annie and Cat.

To those of you who complain about the speck in your brother’s eye and ignore the log in your own, I say . . . keep trying.

The elderly share several characteristics, some already mentioned.

1.They are often hard of hearing: they whisper loudly.
2. They often live alone or are, otherwise, lonely and are, therefore, happy to see you - even if you are not happy to see them.
3. They are often poor, and are not afforded many opportunities to socialize.
4. Their friends are dying off so they know fewer people with whom to socialize.
5. They are often unable to drive so their world is greatly restricted or isolated.
6. They ALL live lives of pain (body, mind, and soul), the legacy of aging.
7. They are often dependent on others - and they know it - and that hurts.
8. They are often abandoned by their children.
9. They often live with the memories of all of the things they used to do and enjoy but can no longer do and enjoy.
10. The older they get, they become more vulnerable and suffer more abuse by a society that views them as a burden, by family that views them as a drain on resources, and by good Catholics, who are preceded by their own lack of understanding, compassion, and charity.

One final observation that I think is worthwhile contemplating: whatever we do to these aged folks, who are some of the least of our brothers and sisters, we do to Jesus.

If it matters, I am 65.

May God Bless

Monk

 

[Walking_Home]

I’m old (47 next month), and I wish they’d all shut up—old people, young people, cantors, announcers, “liturgical musicians”, the whole pack of them.

The inside of a church is God’s house, not the floor of the stock exchange. Everybody entering one needs to shut up and show some respect for the Blessed Sacrament.

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