Why do you think there are so few twentysomethings in the Church today?

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Young_Thinker

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Honestly, it seems like I’m the only one at my parish who’s between 19 and 35- either you’re in high school or you’re old and married LOL. Having converted a couple of years ago, I still kind of feel like an outsider- I joined the Knights of Columbus last year, but everyone else in my council is at least 40 (and my council isn’t particularily active as of late anyway), and lately I’ve been attending a Lifeteen Mass on ocassion at nearby church, but as a single 23-year old, I still left out and in a class unto my own. LOL Does anyone feel this way? Why are there so few young people (post-high school) who go to Mass? Boredom, overrationalism…?
 
Many people don’t understand why it’s important to go to Mass.😦
 
Yea, I agree.

It starts when they’re young…

If the spiritual life isin’t made real and lived out at home…when they get to mass, the mass is boring and not too helpful to a soul who is cold.

After that, it’s a downward spiral in a society who is a destroyer of souls. Since they’re not being nourished, they fall away.

Lastly, I don’t see a huge amount of effort in parishes attempting to make the faith real…which is what the young are REALLY searching for. Since they don’t get it at the parish…they walk blindly in society for it and are put in danger.
 
They don’t understand the importance of Mass. And you have to remember the parents of today’s young adults, they grew up in a time where they didn’t learn their faith very well growing up (the “nuns on the bus” generation were their teachers) and so they go to Mass each week but don’t live their faith at home. Eventually many of them stopped going to Mass and then the kids don’t think it’s important to go to Mass, either. Going to Mass is only a small part of the spiritual life. Yes, it’s the most important part but it is only one hour each week and

Also, I think part of the problem is… that there aren’t many 20-somethings at church. People don’t fit in anymore past a certain age so they stop going (not everyone is comfortable being the only adult person there without children other than any priests or religious that may be there).

And let’s not forget the college issue. Many people move away for college where they attend a church somewhere else or they lose their faith and stop going to church altogether. And once they go to college they leave the family parishes that most people go to.

Is there a Newman Center somewhere near you? Perhaps there are some active young adult Catholics there? That also might be a good starting point to make a Young Adult Catholic group. Once the group is formed people might be likely to go to Mass again because they are around other people of their faith again.

Each individual is different, so there isn’t really one good answer to why they stop going to Mass after high school. 🤷
 
Wow, thanks for your responses! Yeah, there’s a Newman Center in my city (I’ve been there a couple times), but I honestly wish that there was something closer to home (I live in the suburbs, and that’s downtown- I can’t always travel 5-10 mi. on a Monday night. LOL), but oh well, I guess beggars can’t be choosers!
 
It also might be the mass that you go to as well.

Different crowds go at different days/times.

Happily, I"m in the ‘married w/kids’ group now. (Still, I remember feeling the same way you do in my 20’s)

Most churches simply aren’t really prepared to to minister to your age group, given that the longer period between graduating college and marriage.

Are you in a college town? In my town, we have a parish close to the university, so I’m willing to bet that’s where most of the 20-somethings go. That just might be the case in your area, as well.

Still, I love the idea of starting your own 20-something group at the church. We need young people to be active in the parish.
 
Being someone in that age group who has experienced the same thing as you, I believe there are many causes.


  1. *]The Quiet Revolution if you are from Quebec, Canada, combined it with Vatican II. The two happened at the same time which caused many changes both good and bad to be implemented. If you are from outside Quebec, Vatican II in general because it caused many changes including people realizing that they no longer had to go to church to go to heaven. The liturgy was changed and many people became lost and left the church. Some parishes removed various prayers that people enjoyed such as adoration etc which caused people to become confused and eventually left the church. Santuaries were defaced. The list is long.
    *]The sex scandles. Until the 80’s 90’s, instead of the church reprimanding and reporting those who were committing the abuse to the police, they were covering it up. We have heard of numerous cases of priests abusing children in one place, being sent to another location where history repeated itself. Most of this happened when our grandparents attended church. They heard about it and they stopped taking their children to church. This has caused a domino effect because if their children didn’t go to church, it is unlikely, they would take their children (us) to church.
    *]Lack of educational programs in general. Until Vatican II, the church relied upon Catholic schools to education the children, but as people left the religious orders, many schools were forced to close because they could not afford to pay the higher salaries the layteachers they needed to hire required. When the schools closed, it became important for the churches in general to provide educational programs for people of all ages. Most did not implement or offer programs for all ages therefore if the programs aren’t offered, it becomes easy for people to leave. Most churches I know still don’t offer educational programs for their members.
    *]Age of the sacraments. If you think about it: the age of first communion is 7 or 8 and then confirmation is 11 or 12. These are the only main programs for children in terms of education. After that it ends
    *]Lack of Sunday school (catechism for children.) or if they have it, it is boring. I have helped out on occassion at the one at my church and all I can say is: talk about boring. I rarely volunteer because it is so boring.
    *]Plus there aren’t any groups for the teens and young adults. Even if the church doesn’t have many, they can always join forces with another parish and go together.
    *]Plus we have a lack of priests which makes it difficult because their time is spread thin. Many cover several parishes which means they don’t have the time to dedicate to many ministers.
    *]Young people look up to the priests. This 20 to 35 generation is all about relationships. I’ve noticed the groups where the young people can get close to the priest are more apt to succeed and bring new people in.
    *]Plus we also have the mentality where most Catholics see church as a religion instead of a relationship with God. Most only return for Christmas, Easter, and whenever they have a child that needs to be baptised, first communion, or confirmation otherwise they are never around.
    *]Furthermore, mass can be boring. It is only once we mature do we realize how beautiful it is. If children aren’t taught what actually happens, why mass is important, they are going to disappear.
    *]Parish life- many parishes are great at having mass, but the community backbone, the welcoming aspect also lacks. Church isn’t only about going to mass, it is about sharing our love for Christ in the community. If people don’t know their neighbour, how in the heck are they doing to stay? It always amazes me how fast the santuary can empty. In about 5 minutes 50 people can easily leave. The only ones who remain generally need to speak to the priest for one reason or another. It is important to offer opportunities in terms of suppers, meals, coffee time where community can be developed.

    Each point I listed has many levels. I think as a church, we need to look at what the Evangelical churches are doing and see how their programs can be adapted. Afterall their churches are filled with people of all ages.
 
I feel the same way with regards to being the only twenty-something at Mass. Then again, I go to the 7:00 am Mass 😃

While we cannot control why younger parishioners don’t go to Mass more often, we can still pray that they find their way back to the Church and Her graces 🙂
 
They don’t have their parents dragging them to Mass, and they don’t have kids they need to worry about raising in the faith either. Usually that leaves little to no remaining motivation 😦
 
StGeorgesSquire said:
I feel the same way with regards to being the only twenty-something at Mass. Then again, I go to the 7:00 am Mass 😃

While we cannot control why younger parishioners don’t go to Mass more often, we can still pray that they find their way back to the Church and Her graces 🙂
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Very true.

When I attend weekday Mass, I’m below the average age by 30+ years usually. Sometimes there’s a few mothers who bring their kids, though. Really the issue for a lot of parishes is that there are high school programs and adult programs. Nothing really for the twentysomethings…I know many are away at college…but I wish parishes did a little more in working on including them though.
 
Unfortunately, most suburban/rural parishes focus on the married with kids crowd and/or retired crowd.

From my own experiences you have two courses you can take:
  1. Get involve with parish activities whether you are the youngest person or not. Go in with the attitude that you have something to contribute AND you have something to learn from others.
  2. Seek out those parishes and groups where you age group gathers. Perhaps the archdiocesian website has some information. Unfortunately these groups tend to be around colleges and urban areas. You might just have to bite the bullet and travel out of teh suburbs.
I did both of these in my twenties. I was often the youngest among a group of volunteers in my parish and sought out spiritual comfort at an urban parish that had single young people as patrt of the community

Searching for reasons is good, but focusing on the solution for “you” should be your real focus
 
stephe1987 said:
They don’t understand the importance of Mass. And you have to remember the parents of today’s young adults, they grew up in a time where they didn’t learn their faith very well growing up (the “nuns on the bus” generation were their teachers) and so they go to Mass each week but don’t live their faith at home.
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SecretGarden’s post is spot-on, but I think this is the biggest issue. The catechesis in the 70s-80s was sorely lacking at best. When I started re-strengthening my faith a few years ago I was shocked by some of what I read. I’m not talking about minor points and obscure rules, but a lot of the fundamental basics that I never heard in my 12 years of Catholic schooling. Transubstanti-what? The Immaculate Conception didn’t refer to Jesus? My head spun when I read that missing Mass was a mortal sin and that I was absolutely required to receive Confession once per year. The priest who married us told us that raising our kids in the faith meant getting them the Sacraments. As far as I knew, our sporadic Sunday attendance and occasional appearances on Christmas and Easter were just fine; it was certainly better than what my peers were doing.

Although I know better now, when I try to correct the misconceptions of my family and friends, they think I’m off my rocker. They all came from roughly the same background and think I’m nuts when I tell them that they shouldn’t be taking Communion with mortal sins on their consciences, that things other than rape, murder & adultery are actually considered mortal sins, that the Church doesn’t actually make concessions for contraception and abortion based on your circumstances, and that you truly and honestly are required to be at Mass every Sunday and holy day of obligation. They think the priests who occasionally speak out about sin and pro-life issues should be defrocked, while Father Feelgood, who incorporates all sorts of pop culture references into his homilies, uses his iPhone on the altar and is a card-carrying member of Catholics for Choice, is the only sort of priest who can get them to make their thrice-yearly appearances in the pews.

I think youth groups are a great idea but I think the best hope for getting the twentysomethings back in the pews is for their parents to do the same. I drag my son every time he’s home when we go and don’t give him the option of skipping out on the family Rosary. I talk to him (and the rest of my family) about our faith as often as I can and work hard to instill those things I missed out on. While it hasn’t had huge, visible results, I’m hoping it makes a difference at some point down the road.
 
SecretGarden said:
Being someone in that age group who has experienced the same thing as you, I believe there are many causes.

[L
[*]Young people look up to the priests. This 20 to 35 generation is all about relationships. I’ve noticed the groups where the young people can get close to the priest are more apt to succeed and bring new people in.

*]Plus we also have the mentality where most Catholics see church as a religion instead of a relationship with God. Most only return for Christmas, Easter, and whenever they have a child that needs to be baptised, first communion, or confirmation otherwise they are never around.

*]Furthermore, mass can be boring. It is only once we mature do we realize how beautiful it is. If children aren’t taught what actually happens, why mass is important, they are going to disappear.
*]Parish life- many parishes are great at having mass, but the community backbone, the welcoming aspect also lacks. Church isn’t only about going to mass, it is about sharing our love for Christ in the community. If people don’t know their neighbour, how in the heck are they doing to stay? It always amazes me how fast the santuary can empty. In about 5 minutes 50 people can easily leave. The only ones who remain generally need to speak to the priest for one reason or another. It is important to offer opportunities in terms of suppers, meals, coffee time where community can be developed.

Each point I listed has many levels. I think as a church, we need to look at what the Evangelical churches are doing and see how their programs can be adapted.

WOW you sure covered all the issues–

most of the time roman catholic mass is a ceremony – with out any spiritual impartment-, indumement-- or as a penecostal would say-- “anointing”-
  • all though catholic’s are taught the “real presence”
and if you don’t believe it – than you are damned

it is firmly enforced

with the counsal or tent…

Canons on the Most Holy Sacrament of the Eucharist

Canon 1. If anyone denies that in the sacrament of the most Holy Eucharist are contained truly, really and substantially the body and blood together with the soul and divinity of our Lord Jesus Christ, and consequently the whole Christ,[42] but says that He is in it only as in a sign, or figure or force, let him be anathema.

Canon 2. If anyone says that in the sacred and, holy sacrament of the Eucharist the substance of the bread and wine remains conjointly with the body and blood of our Lord Jesus Christ, and denies that wonderful and singular change of the whole substance of the bread into the body and the whole substance of the wine into the blood, the appearances only of bread and wine remaining, which change the Catholic Church most aptly calls transubstantiation,[43] let him be anathema.

Canon 3. If anyone denies that in the venerable sacrament of the Eucharist the whole Christ is contained under each form and under every part of each form when separated,[44] let him be anathema.

Canon 4. If anyone says that after the consecration is completed, the body and blood of our Lord Jesus Christ are not in the admirable sacrament of the Eucharist,[45] but are there only , while being taken and not before or after, and that in the hosts or consecrated particles which are reserved or which remain after communion, the true body of the Lord does not remain, let him be anathema.

Canon 5. If anyone says that the principal fruit of the most Holy Eucharist is the remission of sins, or that other effects do not result from it,[46] let him be anathema.

Canon 6. If anyone says that in the holy sacrament of the Eucharist, Christ, the only begotten Son of God, is not to be adored with the worship of ,[47] also outwardly manifested, and is consequently neither to be venerated with a special festive solemnity, nor to be solemnly borne about in procession according to the laudable and universal rite and custom of holy Church, or is not to be set publicly before the people to be adored and that the adorers thereof are idolaters, let him be anathema.

Canon 7. If anyone says that it is not lawful that the Holy Eucharist be reserved in a sacred place, but immediately after consecration must necessarily be distributed among those present,[48] or that it is not lawful that it be carried with honor to the sick, let him be anathema.

Canon 8. If anyone says that Christ received in the Eucharist is received spiritually only and not also sacramentally and really,[49] let him be anathema.
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StGeorgesSquire said:
I feel the same way with regards to being the only twenty-something at Mass. Then again, I go to the 7:00 am Mass 😃
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According to my pastor, the average age of the goes down as the day goes by. So early Sunday morning, would be the highest number of older people.
While we cannot control why younger parishioners don’t go to Mass more often, we can still pray that they find their way back to the Church and Her graces 🙂
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👍

And find a parish, if possible, that has more younger parishioners.

If you attend daily Mass at my parish, you would find that about half of the attendees are college age. The last thing we have a problem with is too few twenty somethings attending Mass.
 
My generation just don’t know much of God and religion i guess. Maybe if they took the time and watched a touching movie like Passion of the Christ instead of watching garbage movies with jesus jokes and shows on MTV, Then maybe they would take god more seriously and the church would have more kids! 🙂
 
What about going to a Newman center I think many young people are in college or living near a college.
 
Adamski said:
What about going to a Newman center I think many young people are in college or living near a college.
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That’s a good idea! However for me, I can’t really fit the meetings of my local center into my schedule.
 
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