Good stuff there grannymh…
However - for the sake of discussion, I will argue that it is not our actions that determine our state, but rather it is our state that determines our actions.
Thus - sin is less about a discrete act than it is about a state of being. Using your candy bar example…One enters a state of sin when they decide to steal the candy…the act is a result of that state. The same thing is true of killing the store owner.
Likewise one enters a state of grace the moment one turns away from sin.
Naturally in the above I am painting strictly “black and white” and the Church recognizes the grey areas known as venial sin…where grace can still exist (in a weakened form) as we struggle with some sin or other.
But I share this to make the point, as I think you have here - that we need to look at sin as a state of being, and not simply as discrete acts.
Peace
James