Will life insurance pay for funerals?

[danialmark83]

I will find that funeral services are so expensive in US so what’s the best way to save money on a funeral? Will life insurance pay for funerals? I have to suggest my friend who is basically from Texas so it’s better for me if anyone give me info on Texas funeral services.

Thanks,
Danial

 

[rpp]

Life insurance makes payments to beneficiaries upon the death of the insured (provided that the death was not caused by excluded means such as suicide; check each policy for restrictions.)

How the beneficiaries use the money is up to them. Usually, it goes toward funeral expenses. Generally speaking, though there may be exceptions, life insurance does not pay the funeral expenses directly.

Having said that, I must be quick to point out that I am not an insurance expert.

 

[CentralFLJames]

Social Security will give a very small payment - forgot how much - few hundred dollars I think - its a joke.

The problem for the surviving family is on hand cash. It takes time to get the insurance settlements so the executor of the estate has to pay for things and get reimbursed. The best thing to do is open a join checking account or change the existing banking accounts to “joint” account with the person who is at risk of dieing and making the executor the other person. This way they can directly write checks to cover expenses. Also at all costs avoid probate. Most mutual funds and banks accounts can be set up with a “Transfer on Death” clause that automatically makes a designated person (the executor) the owner of the account once you present them the death certificate from the funeral home. Even the primary residence can be made a joint ownership with transfer on death. Its possible for not a single penny to have to go through probate judgement and fairly easy actually.

Funerals are getting quite expensive. If you do the full honor guard to escort the deceased to the grave site and use singers and do higher end coffins and vaults etc. it can get to be $15K or more easily. But that’s a higher-end funeral - average is probably around $8K or so assuming you already own the cemetery plot (another $2K-$5K). Reception and food expenses can get high too if you have a large family and end up catering it at a special hall rather than in the home - just depends on how large a family and gathering you have (most church’s will offer their rec hall for a minor fee too if available).

If you have a person who is soon to die I’d go ahead and see about getting them to set aside some cash for taking care of things and talking frank about it.Otherwise somone in the family is going to have to take care of it all and not everything can be put on credit card.

James

 

[maryjk]

Life insurance makes payments to beneficiaries upon the death of the insured (provided that the death was not caused by excluded means such as suicide; check each policy for restrictions.)

How the beneficiaries use the money is up to them. Usually, it goes toward funeral expenses. Generally speaking, though there may be exceptions, life insurance does not pay the funeral expenses directly.

Having said that, I must be quick to point out that I am not an insurance expert.

Nor am I, but I do know that when my grandparents died, the funeral home carried a balance until the insurance money came in.

 

[1edyson]

Like its been said, Life Insurance will pay the beneficiaries, and the beneficiaries will decide how the money is spent, unless otherwise noted in the policies. For example if the policies pay to a Trust of some sort and specific instructions have been left. In addition in some states, you can purchase “burial” insurance policies from the Funeral Homes themselves that allow you to prepay funeral expenses. Social Security will pay 255 dollars for final expenses if you qualify.

 

[mchale]

I will find that funeral services are so expensive in US so what’s the best way to save money on a funeral? Will life insurance pay for funerals? I have to suggest my friend who is basically from Texas so it’s better for me if anyone give me info on Texas funeral services.

Thanks,
Danial

I hate to say it, but many Funeral Homes are rather predatory in their practices. I am not saying all are. Still many Funeral Homes take advantage of the fact that their customers tend to come to them in periods of extreme stress in their lives (i.e., the death of a loved one). As a result, people often get up sold on the casket and the funeral home services, and additionally sold a host of products and services they don’t need.

Caskets need be little more than a simple wooden box – but often people end up in caskets costing thousands of dollars because after all, their residents don’t want them spending eternity in the a simple pine box.

Did you know that embalming is not generally required? In fact, if I remember correctly, Orthodox Jews cannot be embalmed.

Sealed Caskets, vaults, etc… None of them will stop the decomposition of a body.

In other words, if you want to keep the cost down, keep it simple. The most important parts of a funeral is the funeral mass, and the priest will do that for a rather small fee (or waive it if a family is truly strapped for funds).

–
Bill

 

[danialmark83]

I am personally thankful to all of you for your advice. It’s really help me lot to clear some basic doubt.

Thanks,

 

[kage_ar]

Remember, cremation is your least expensive option.

 

[CentralFLJames]

Remember, cremation is your least expensive option.

I don’t really think that price should be a primary choice for Catholics at all. Even in death, the body is sacred. I don’t recollect the exact position that the Church takes on cremation but I think it is not a preferred choice and is only a pragmatic concession to full burial due to the ever increasing costs of burial. It was not that long ago when this is forbidden by The Church if one wanted a Catholic funeral and burial with full blessings. It is only “tolerated” and must still be done in a respectful and solemn manner and the ashes can not be scattered all over the planet and divvied up among relatives like so many secularists are doing these days.

The casket burial has a lot of advantages emotionally. At least there is no doubt remaining with the family about who is in the casket. It is therefor possible to get “closure” on the passing - and I recommend an open casket (esp. for relatives who have not seen the deceased in a long time) since it makes death “real” to everyone and not just a sterile ceremony. People really need closure and to confront their own mortality - closed casket and cremation short circuit this process. Another downside to cremation is that it takes a long time after the death to arrange for the actual cremation and people are emotionally distant when it comes time to do a memorial and the sense of urgency is removed - and many just send cards and won’t show up to the memorial.

Personally I resented when a family friend died and his children announced that he was to be cremated. We had no announcement for a mass and lost a sense of temporal proximity to the obituary announcement to go look for information. I ended up missing the memorial since his children did not know me and never got the word out to his friends as to when and where they would do it.

James

 

[whatevergirl]

*I used to sell life insurance, and there are ‘funeral plans,’ which still give a ‘benefit’ to the beneficiary that you appoint to pay for the funeral. Hope that helps. Most funerals these days are running on average up to $10k. I was shocked by that. *

 

[kage_ar]

I don’t really think that price should be a primary choice for Catholics at all. Even in death, the body is sacred. I don’t recollect the exact position that the Church takes on cremation but I think it is not a preferred choice and is only a pragmatic concession to full burial due to the ever increasing costs of burial. It was not that long ago when this is forbidden by The Church if one wanted a Catholic funeral and burial with full blessings. It is only “tolerated” and must still be done in a respectful and solemn manner and the ashes can not be scattered all over the planet and divvied up among relatives like so many secularists are doing these days.

These may be your opinions, however, the Church does not use the term “tolerated”. Cremation is permitted, and is not discouraged.

scborromeo.org/ccc/para/2301.htm

**2301 **Autopsies can be morally permitted for legal inquests or scientific research. The free gift of organs after death is legitimate and can be meritorious.
The Church permits cremation, provided that it does not demonstrate a denial of faith in the resurrection of the body.

 

[CentralFLJames]

These may be your opinions, however, the Church does not use the term “tolerated”. Cremation is permitted, and is not discouraged.

scborromeo.org/ccc/para/2301.htm

**2301 **Autopsies can be morally permitted for legal inquests or scientific research. The free gift of organs after death is legitimate and can be meritorious.
The Church permits cremation, provided that it does not demonstrate a denial of faith in the resurrection of the body.

Please try to “tolerate” my use of my own words in giving some historical connectivity and continuity to the topic at hand. It’s a nuanced topic and my choice of words we deliberate to give some insight into tenor of the Church’s RECENT change in PERMITTING cremation – while still holding to burial as a PREFERRED means to reverence the dead. A blind cut and paste of the Catholic Catechism that is “dead” to the changing history of the matter while technically correct is rather legalistic as well as parochial to that history. If you want a more legalistic tone then go to cannon law and there you will see that what I am saying is correct - traditional burial is preferred and cremation is permitted.

I suspect you have your own emotional reasons for advocating your personal idea that that cremation is equally accepted to to our ancient Catholic burial traditions. But the truth is it is not - at least among the older clergy who were ordained before Vatican II. The Church STILL has a preference for Catholic burial over cremation even though it is not stated in the Catechism. The Catechism is also new since Trent and has never been intended to be a repository of tradition. It is only recently that The Church has broken with its 2,000 years of funeral tradition to change its perspective on cremation. Newer still is the Church’s laxing of ecclesial restrictions to even permit the cremated remains to be brought into The Church during the funeral mass.

From early Christian days cremation was viewed as a **pagan practice **and a denial of the doctrine of the Resurrection. That’s why **cremation was expressly forbidden **by the Catholic Church until recent years.

In 1963, an Instruction from the Holy Office (now the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith) lifted the ban on cremation by **allowing it in certain circumstances **provided that the reasons for choosing cremation were not contrary to Christian belief. However, burial of the body was clearly to be preferred. No allowance was made for any prayer or ritual to be used with the cremated remains. In other words, all services were to be in the presence of the body of the deceased, with cremation allowed only afterwards.

The Church performed its Rite of Committal at the grave site. The remains were NOT permitted in the funeral mass before the blessed sacrament. The Catholic Church has always had the utmost respect and reverence for the human body and the prayers of the funeral liturgy reflect this.

In the revised funeral rites of 1969, Ordo Exsequiarum, mandated by Vatican II, a further step was taken to allow for the Committal Rite to take place at the crematorium or grave site: “Funeral rites are to be granted to those who have chosen cremation, unless there is evidence that their choice was dictated by anti-Christian motives…The funeral is to be celebrated…in a way that clearly expresses the Church’s preference for burying the dead…that forestalls any danger of scandalizing or shocking the faithful” (#15). The presumption was that the funeral Mass would be celebrated in the presence of the body with cremation held off until later.

In the 1983 revision of the Code of Canon Law, the traditional practice was reinforced. “The Church earnestly recommends that the pious custom of burying the bodies of the dead be observed; it does not, however, forbid cremation unless it has been chosen for reasons which are contrary to Christian teaching” (Canon 1176).

The further revised funeral rites, Order of Christian Funerals, in use since 1989, maintain this tradition of preference for burial of the body: “Since in Baptism the body was marked with the seal of the Trinity and became the temple of the Holy Spirit, Christians respect and honor the bodies of the dead and the places where they rest…” (#19).

**In the United States up until 1997, the Order of Christian Funerals clearly indicated that if cremation had been chosen, cremated remains were not to be brought into church for the funeral Mass. Even now this is permitted only in cases where special circumstances warrant it and the bishop approves. The reasoning is that the funeral rites are intended to honor the body of the deceased. **

More here:
Cremation:
New Options for Catholics

James

 

[rpp]

In short. In the past the Church had forbidden cremation as it was too closely associated with pagan rituals and many felt it denied the the Resurrection. Society has changed over time and pagan association as well as the denial of the resurrection are not very prevelant at all. So the Church now permits this practice.

The earlier strictures against cremation were not articles of faith or a strict moral teaching, it was an attempt to avoid scandal. Now that the risk of scandal is essentially absent, cremation is permitted.

I do not believe that the scattering of ashes or the division of ashes are not permitted as it violates the dignity of the person.

Have I got this right?

My father chose to be cremated and those are also my mother’s wishes. I want to be buried.

 

[CentralFLJames]

In short. In the past the Church had forbidden cremation as it was too closely associated with pagan rituals and many felt it denied the the Resurrection. Society has changed over time and pagan association as well as the denial of the resurrection are not very prevelant at all. So the Church now permits this practice.

The earlier strictures against cremation were not articles of faith or a strict moral teaching, it was an attempt to avoid scandal. Now that the risk of scandal is essentially absent, cremation is permitted.

I do not believe that the scattering of ashes or the division of ashes are not permitted as it violates the dignity of the person.

Have I got this right?

My father chose to be cremated and those are also my mother’s wishes. I want to be buried.

This is correct. I am with you - I want the real thing - full burial with the three distinct phases of the ancient Catholic funeral rites:

1. The vigil
2. The funeral liturgy, which is typically a Mass.
3. The rite of committal at the cemetery,

For pragmatic reasons, if creamated, it is hard to get all 3 aspects of the traditional Catholic rites done in proper order due to the time necessary to do/schedule the cremation and due to the fact that it still requires SPECIAL permission from the bishop to get cremated remains brought into Church for funeral liturgy. Cremated remains are not substantially the same body that was baptised and this is one of the reasons why a modification to the liturgy is used. There are also special considerations if cremated due to contagious disease or war or severely disfiguring accident.

If the bishop does grant permission (probably most do now) for the cremated remains to be present at the funeral mass then a special liturgy is used that avoids the reference to “baptism”. To me this is quite sad since it impacts the integral essence of the mass since the concept of the “pall” cloth draped over the coffin (where we get the expression pall bearers from) is symbolic of our baptismal robes and it can not be draped over cremated remains.

There is a lot of symbolism in a Catholic funeral that is sadly being forgotten by more modern day Catholics.

James

 

[Nicollle]

I’d just get cremated and have memorial service. I find funerals(expecially open casket ones) creepy. What is the point of shelling out money just to have makeup put on a dead person? They look ghastly anyway.

 

[Jay53]

They look ghastly anyway.

Not if the embalmer does a good job!

(That’s what I do for a living. )

 

[quiet52]

I think most Catholics respect the preference for burial of the body. However, we also need to respect the reality of the expense. Not everyone can afford the cost of a coffin, gravesite, etc. They should never be judged as to their faithfulness.

 

[kage_ar]

Note to the previous poster, linking to a liberal site like American Catholic dot org will not gain you many points with those more orthodox minded.

The ancient practice of burial has little or no relation to the modern practice of embalming. If a family can have a burial without the modern embalming the way it was done for centuries in the Church, they must be willing to schedule the funeral mass very quickly. Not many are willing to do that, and not all parishes can do a fast funeral.

 

[CentralFLJames]

Note to the previous poster, linking to a liberal site like American Catholic dot org will not gain you many points with those more orthodox minded.

The ancient practice of burial has little or no relation to the modern practice of embalming. If a family can have a burial without the modern embalming the way it was done for centuries in the Church, they must be willing to schedule the funeral mass very quickly. Not many are willing to do that, and not all parishes can do a fast funeral.

I buried my young wife not long ago and wanted to share some practical information. I don’t think you have a clue about what you are talking about and I resent your personal condescension here. It’s uncalled for. Your interactive style is lacking in basic courtesy and charity. It is just so ridiculous and immature to attempt impugn me as a liberal for linking to a good article. It just so happens that I am a very orthodox and conservative Catholic. I think you are the very first person in my life to ever make a sideways comment to try to paint me as a liberal. I have to almost laugh here. Good gracious, if anything the article I linked has a conservative slant not a liberal one. You are the one advocating more liberal and as you say “modern practices”. The truth is cremation used to be seen as a pagan and heterodox practice. It still requires special permission to even bring the cremated remains into church.

Yes, a family must be willing to make quick decisions on burial and it is very stressful for the surviving family. Been there done that and it happens every single day. But you are wrong that many are not willing to do a traditional burial. The numbers vary by region but it is only a recent phenomena that cremation has started to trend toward more preferred. It ranges from 20%-55% of funerals electing cremation depending on circumstances and location. Burial is still the majority practice in most areas.

Yes, there are indeed pragmatic considerations. One you didn’t mention is that in the north the ground is frozen at certain times of the year which may also be a factor in the decision. Not so where I live in FL - we are fortunate and have more year round options.

For the record I have not known any parishes here where I live that will not bend over backwards to work in a short notice funeral mass any day of the week – even on a mid day Sunday. I have even attended normal daily scheduled masses where they elected to make it a funeral mass without advance warning. It can be very special to be able to share in a mass with a fallen Catholic even if not personally known - normally one just leaves after communion if its a worked in funeral mass so the family can speak about the deceased.

So please drop the personal attacks and move on please.

James

 

[CentralFLJames]

I’d just get cremated and have memorial service. I find funerals(expecially open casket ones) creepy. What is the point of shelling out money just to have makeup put on a dead person? They look ghastly anyway.

I understand your feelings on the matter and used to feel the same way. Let me convey a personal story that might change your perspective as it did me when I lost my own young wife.

When the actual time came to decide I was torn. Some of her family wanted closed casket. Others who had not seen her for many years but remembered her as beautiful wanted to see her one last time. I agonized over this and just wanted peace and to do “the right thing” for everyone - including myself.

In deciding I recollected from my own past experiences how closed caskets sometimes seemed to foster an impersonal and irreverent setting for the family but it was pragmatic and an emotionally easier thing to do. By irreverent I mean that people can sometimes turn a wake into “social” and forget why they are there and fail to keep the occasion solemn – even joking, laughing and talking near the casket. I wanted more reverence so I also elected to do the vigil at church with full ceremonies rather than a short service at the funeral home and tended toward an early preference for an open casket.

I was under severe anxiety about not wanting to upset my mother in law’s wishes for closed casket – more in a moment. I consulted our family priest who was originally from Ireland. He told me that we Americans tended to be very impersonal and do not like to show our emotions and are almost emotionally “sterile”. He advised that in his home land it’s a different attitude and strongly suggested I consider an open casket since she was so loved and people needed closure and to face the reality that she has passed.

For background information let me just also say that her death passion was very difficult. On her death-bed she had an unnatural and unpleasant facial expression of suffering that was quite hard to deal with. But these expressions were actually completely contrary to how joyful she lived in life and how courageously she really did die. At death she actually had made an impossible smile with hopeful eyes brightly shining. She looking right past and through death without the least fear – her joyful eyes absolutely convicted me in the knowledge that she went straight to heaven. It was only in the “after effects” of death that her face had become sunken and empty as the muscles relaxed; appearing as a poured out libation – having given all she had to God. But her mother and brothers had seen that terrible death look and it disturbed them greatly – as it did me. I remember vividly how I sat there in tears holding her hand as her mother very coldly told me “I want the casket closed – that’s not her anymore” - the farthest thing from my mind at that time.

I held my decision pending my preview at the funeral home. OMG - she was beautiful - dressed in her white wedding gown as she wanted it! She absolutely radiated peace and beauty with a very natural look - a far cry from that graven look after her labored death. I was simply awestruck at how well the funeral home had presented her. I decided right then that the best thing was a compromise. I announced that we were to have an early showing at the church vigil with open casket for select family members and closed casket for others at the regular time.

That evening during the private open casket viewing her mother stubbornly refused to walk up and look. She seemed more angry and bitter at me for defying her wishes on the casket being closed than she was sad at the loss her daughter. She would not listen to my explanation that when the actual services started it would be closed. She cried bitterly the whole time as everyone else went forward – secretly stealing a few distance glances now and then since the open casket was only a short distance away from where she sat in the front pew. Her sons loyal to “mom” also would not go up to view and gave me looks of resignation and begrudged empathy. As other non-family arrived I gave her one last look and had the casket closed. But just before the formal vigil service started a late arriving beloved family member who traveled a great distance insisted we open it again for a quick viewing. He was a favorite childhood uncle of hers who had not seen her in many years. He walked up and was immediately overcome with emotion and exclaimed “Good Lord she’s so beautiful!” Her brothers then rushed forward to see and they all broke down crying - one coming back to me and unceasingly shaking my hand through tears, hugging me and saying “Never mind mom – great call – please leave that casket open for the whole service!”

As an aside let me also say that it’s the only funeral I have been to where the funeral director and his staff also had to fight back their own tears. They did not personally know her but I think they were overcome with emotion in how well they did their own work and in how the family was reacting.

Everyone present at her death but her mother got to replace those terrible mental images with those of her in splendid beauty and peace. I am certain that her mom will regret the decision not to look on her daughter’s beautiful face a final time for the rest of her life. It only embittered her the more when others mentioned during the reception how beautiful her daughter looked. She has since fogiven me.

Moral of the story? A good funeral home can make a deceased person look amazingly presentable. A well presented viewing that puts the deceased in a much superior and more peaceful and natural presentation can be very comforting to surviving loved ones who’s last memories were quite painful to remember. Thus it can help soften the pain of loss and assist in closure and restore dignity in our Christian hope.

James