Withdrawal symptoms from stopping self-pleasuring??

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jorgeK said:
Hello,
Over a month ago I stopped “MBing” entirely.
I knew it was a grave sin but I would do it regularly. Like, 2 times a day regularly.
For over years now.

But back in February I stopped it entirely. Over a month. The longest stretch I have EVER gone not doing that.

But…
I’ve been struggling terribly with inability to sleep, depression, anxiety, racing heart.
This has been going on for weeks now.

But I can’t get straight answers online. Because everywhere I go you just hear how great, wonderful, and healthy it is.
I knew this wasn’t right because even before becoming Catholic I would feel this odd sense of “blah” after doing it… but I just kept on with it.

I’m seeing a counselor and she thinks it’s the best stuff since sliced bread.
She refuses to concede that I could be having withdrawal symptoms from MBing.

Someone please help shed some light on this for me!!
any one else struggle with withdrawal???
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Hey Brother, I suspect that this has been involved with internet porn? Right. For a first step the porn needs to stop. Get a good filter with accountability reporting such as wisechoice.net or for a review try filterreview.org . Removing the stimulation makes the second issue easier to deal with…blessings…give the guilt to God, embrace His Grace and turn away from the sin…
 
Thank you Gorgek for your original question!!

I’m a guy in his early 20’s battling with the same sin. I’m addicted too and want to stop. congratulations on going for so long! I’m really impressed - keep up the struggle! I did 3 weeks and was having withdrawal too.

Thou my addiction came from my girlfriend dumping me for no reason several years ago. after getting through depression and surving a few suicide attempts, i’ve now moved on to battle this sin. So perhaps, like me theres a reason underneath for all of this.

I’ll pray for you so that the Lord may give you strength.
I know all too well how it’s not easy. But we’ll pick up our crosses and follow Christ together and with his help, maybe we can both be free to have wonderful marriages. God bless you.
 
Robert789 said:
Thank you Gorgek for your original question!!

I’m a guy in his early 20’s battling with the same sin. I’m addicted too and want to stop. congratulations on going for so long! I’m really impressed - keep up the struggle! I did 3 weeks and was having withdrawal too.

Thou my addiction came from my girlfriend dumping me for no reason several years ago. after getting through depression and surving a few suicide attempts, i’ve now moved on to battle this sin. So perhaps, like me theres a reason underneath for all of this.

I’ll pray for you so that the Lord may give you strength.
I know all too well how it’s not easy. But we’ll pick up our crosses and follow Christ together and with his help, maybe we can both be free to have wonderful marriages. God bless you.
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If you guys got an extra cross laying around I’ll pick one up and follow along. I’m 66 married and have been addicted to this thing off and on since I was a teen.:gopray:
 
Should we start a support group here on CAF for men struggling with this addiction/sin? Is there already one? If so, link?
 
Thank you also for the link.

I have requested membership.

This is a great idea! We’ll support each other through building our foundations on Christ.

Come on people! Even if we fail often, as long as we’re trying for Christ’s sake then this is a great idea.

i dont know about you’s but i cant keep my promises to myself, but if we can be accountable to each other then thats great!

I aint saying that it will be easy! but when is anything worthwhile easy?? if i can make myself a more attractive spouse for a future wife then this is 100% worth it. i want a happy Christ and wife 🙂
 
OP,

If you’ve found any chastity resources online, my suggestions will not be new to you.

-Exercise regularly
-Frequent the sacraments
-Have a strong daily prayer life
-Try not to find yourself alone for long periods of idle time, especially surfing the net
-Become immersed in a community of like-minded people
 
Have you been to confession? I found once I actually confessed the pornography and masturbation that it has been much much much easier for me to abstain.
 
Hey again everybody

I’ve joined the impurity addiction support group…but i was wondering if there are any accountability groups to help with masturbation??

Maybe some of you are like me, i struggle to keep promises to myself, however i seem to make a much better effort if i’m held accountable. Is there a group out there? Can we start a group? Or can i even have just one person hold me accountable and me hold them accountable?

I’m afraid to join sex-aholics etc incase they want to send me stuff and all (i dont want my parents knowing that i have a problem).

I dont know…i personally dont want to give up masturbating because i enjoy it too much, but i want to be pure so that God will see me fit to recieve a wife…and i dont want to keep offending Jesus.

If anybody has any ideas, please let me know.
 
Robert789 said:
Hey again everybody

I’ve joined the impurity addiction support group…but i was wondering if there are any accountability groups to help with masturbation??

Maybe some of you are like me, i struggle to keep promises to myself, however i seem to make a much better effort if i’m held accountable. Is there a group out there? Can we start a group? Or can i even have just one person hold me accountable and me hold them accountable?

I’m afraid to join sex-aholics etc incase they want to send me stuff and all (i dont want my parents knowing that i have a problem).

I dont know…i personally dont want to give up masturbating because i enjoy it too much, but i want to be pure so that God will see me fit to recieve a wife…and i dont want to keep offending Jesus.

If anybody has any ideas, please let me know.
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I’m not sure about accountability groups, but accountability partners are easy to set up. You just need one friend who you sincerely trust (and who is a fellow guy) to talk to every week or so.

As for your last paragraph, it is good that you want to stop because it offends God. But you also need to pray to God that he changes your heart so it offends YOU. You will not fully get over it until that happens.
 
Robert789 said:
I’m afraid to join sex-aholics etc incase they want to send me stuff and all (i dont want my parents knowing that i have a problem).
.
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S-groups will not send you any literature. They do not know your address unless you tell them. There are usually contact lists available but from my experience they are email and phone lists. You do not have to write your name and contact information on them.

There is literature available at these meetings. You do not have to take any.

I would encourage you to join an in-person group if you think your addiction has really progressed. No better way to find an accountability partner than to meet someone in person. Failing that, I’d “get to know” people in the CAF group through frequent forum posts and ask through PM about setting up some kind of accountability/sponsor relationship.

May I add just one thing though. You do not have to nor should you broadcast your sins to the entire world. But fear and shame is a huge part of this addiction. You might find that talking frankly with other people in a group and/or priests in the confessional will help you break out of that cycle of shame. You are right to want to keep others who do not need to know about your struggle in the dark. But do not be so concerned that their finding out will kill you or them that you do not seek out help.
 
The bucket:

I think you’ve hit the nail on the head! I’m a shy guy…and i’m FAR FAR to embarrased to mention masturbation at confession. i confess lust and sexual impurity and hope that this is enough. i’m nearly glowing red out of embarrassement even saying that!!

So yes, i suppose i am too embarrassed to meet people face to face. It’s not as if i’m CONSTANTLY at it, but i generally struggle to get past 3 days. Whether thats serious enough to call myself a sex-oholic…i dont know. I suppose i’m also to embarrassed to go to a sex-oholic group when i’m still a virgin. But i literally feel that i’m “loosing it” mentally because i’m offending our Lord, dishonouring my parents and possibly damaging my future marriage. Yet i’m tortured by “needing a release” and also by wanting to experience sex.

i just dont know what to do with myself. i’m hurting everyone…but i cant resist temptation. I’m a mess…and I’m sorry for throwing out all my problems.
 
Quite embarrassingly i’ve realised that at my current rate, i’m slowly driving myself insane at not being able to stop self-pleasuring.

BUT someone’s shone light on the situation from another perspective, and i want to share that with you’s…hear you opinions…and hopefully it may help others too.

I’ve looked at my life and realised that, while i do have a weakness to sexual sin, i’m blessed to be stronger in so many areas…and i’m sure you’s are the same!

While it is right, and necessary to strive for purity, we have to also realise that we are human and have fallen natures…therefore it is IMPOSSIBLE to beat sin on our own. While we should still be trying to shake off our sexual sin, perhaps we should be focusing moreso on loving others and spreading the Good News!!

I feel that as long as Christ sees that i am trying to improve, then maybe some day he’ll give me the strength required. But there’s no point in me getting all depressed when i fail because Christ knows that we’re going to sin and that’s why He has offered us confession.

So i’m not going to loose heart and get beat up when i fail, because as long i am trying then that’s all i can offer and i’ve done my best. As long as i go to confession and then try my best again, then Christ will hopefully be pleased. And maybe seeing that i am reaching out to Him, He’ll eventually pick me up and lift me from this sin.

But i’ll focus on loving others and spreading Christ’s word.
I suppose also, i never expected to have a 100% pure wife, so as long as i am actively trying, then i cant offer her any more. Also, i’m yet to quiz a girl on her sexual purity when i first meet her - it’s other qualities that originally attract me. And when love forms, hopefully her and my imperfections will be so small in comparison to what we’ve got going for us.
 
Robert789 said:
The bucket:

I think you’ve hit the nail on the head! I’m a shy guy…and i’m FAR FAR to embarrased to mention masturbation at confession. i confess lust and sexual impurity and hope that this is enough. i’m nearly glowing red out of embarrassement even saying that!!
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I was embarrassed too! Just say it quickly and move onto the next one! Just before I started I prayed for God’s grace to help me get through that part of the confession. The priest did not even blink an eye. It has been SO much easier to resist since then.
 
Did you actually say

“I am sorry fo r the times when i was jealous of others, when i cursed, when i masturbated…etc.”

It’s such a long word though!
I’d probably stumble and get really stuck on it! Haha!

I imagine it’s more embarrassing for girls to admit though because the priest is obviously a respectable male.
 
SLAA and SA would not send you anything. Take care of this now before you get married. The addiction will ruin a marriage. I know from being the wife of a sex addict.
 
If i’m truely honest the main reason why i want to quit is out of fear of ruining my future marriage…otherwise i enjoy it too much! If only i felt the hurt it causes our Lord!!
 
Robert789 said:
Did you actually say

“I am sorry fo r the times when i was jealous of others, when i cursed, when i masturbated…etc.”
.
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The priest hears this sin thousands of times. If I were you I would say something to the effect “I have committed impure acts by myself…X times a week for y years” “I have failed to fully confess this in the past” “I have received the Holy Eucharist on many occasions when I should have gone to confession” (if applicable)

The priest is not going to be shocked, he will likely hear several other similar confessions in the same day. If he wants more information he will ask.
 
Robert789 said:
If i’m truely honest the main reason why i want to quit is out of fear of ruining my future marriage…otherwise i enjoy it too much! If only i felt the hurt it causes our Lord!!
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Honesty is always helpful. We cannot know in this lifetime how much our sins offend an infinite God. You can however, see how much these types of sins hurt wives. There are threads from wives that have discovered their husbands porn/masturbation use every week on this forum and the wives are absolutely devastated. As a man it is difficult to understand until you read some of these threads. I experienced it first hand with my wife and re-live it every time I read one of these threads. Trust me you do not want to put a future wife through this pain. You don’t want realized how badly you have betrayed her and your future children. You got the right idea get control of this before you marry.
 
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