Womanly Weakness

[pnewton]

Please ignore my self-pity in the earlier post. It was a reaction to a bad day. This whole post is a reaction to an unpleasant experience.

It happens. Make some time for adoration, prayer, Scripture or some sort of devotion. Better yet, find some people in need you can serve. What is good for the spirit usually works out pretty good for out emotional state as a bonus.

 

[AKDee]

Please ignore my self-pity in the earlier post. It was a reaction to a bad day. This whole post is a reaction to an unpleasant experience.

It’s understandable. You got us all thinking, anyway! I hope whatever is going on, that it gets better for. I will pray for you.

 

[CRATUS]

It’s understandable. You got us all thinking, anyway! I hope whatever is going on, that it gets better for. I will pray for you.

Some of those scientific studies and dating websites make it seem as though as after 21 a woman is no longer as desirable to opposite sex. Surely, my worth should not depend on what a man thinks of me. Everyone wants to be loved, to be told they are beautiful. It can be a little scary reading even men double my age would prefer women my age or much younger. What is so wrong with a woman after their twenties? I understand biology, but does not nature have to be so cruel. In all honesty, I do not know too many beautiful young women in their early twenties who seek out much older men unless he happens to wealthy. I guess I have had a few crushes on much older men - it was not for money thought - it was their intelligent, maturity, and they just seemed much kinder than men my age, but who knows. It sucks knowing my prime, fertile years will not last forever. There will newer, fresher roses to blossom and replace me. I will try not to be envious, but that is not a promise. Men’s eyes cannot resist a 20s woman’s body.

 

[CRATUS]

When it comes to sex, marriage, and family women have more to lose. With pregnancy the changes in her body. The idea men biologically will be predisposed to prefer younger more fertile women despite women in their age group preferring them. Men can easily walk out on their wives and marriages and seem to remarry much quickly. ONce a woman has a child that becomes her life and responsibility. Women only have so long to naturally conceive. If I wake up at 40 deciding to have a child, it may very be too late for women. Besides, the church is against invitro fertilizations. A man can decide as late as 45 they are tired of screwing around and find a nice, young woman to start a family with.

 

[jmcrae]

Some of those scientific studies and dating websites make it seem as though as after 21 a woman is no longer as desirable to opposite sex.

Good heavens. I didn’t even think about dating until I was finished my degree, at age 22.

I was married by age 25.

 

[CRATUS]

Of course there are some men who ONLY want a younger woman – I mean substantially younger, 15 or mores years younger. A few years ago, I had a very dear friend (35 y.o. male) who assured me time and again that he could only be attracted to women 10 to 15 years younger than him. He even considered that maybe God’s plan was for him to marry a much younger woman, and that’s why he felt that way. Two years later married a woman who is the same age as him They are expecting their first baby soon!

I don’t know how old you are, CRATUS, but that can certainly impact how you feel…

I know that I and many of my friends were approached by much older men when we were in our 20’s. It was common enough that we discussed the phenomenon – and agreed it was creepy. They were clearly only interested in us because we were young, objectifying us, a form of lust. There were other faithful Catholic women in our parish, women who were kind and lovely, funny and intelligent, generous and strong, and in their 40’s. None of us 20-somethings found these men remotely attractive – we didn’t want to be their objects!

Oddly enough, it’s still happening to me. Sometimes I think I will only ever be attractive to men 15 to 25 years my senior! Other times, I wonder if the 65 year old man who bought me coffee at the Starbucks is the same man who asked me out when I was 25 and he was 45 Seriously, though, I think men who hold fast to that 20-year age difference are a tiny minority.

Most men are not like that. They notice the beauty of the young, but most of the good Catholic men I’ve known are not so overly attached to youthful beauty that they’re willing to virtually sell their souls (i.e., turn their back on God’s plan for their lives) by setting their feet in concrete and accepting no other possibility from God except what they want. I suppose there are a few, but I just pray for them and move on.

After all, if God wants me to enter the sacrament of marriage, then there’s just one man I’m looking for who is also looking for me. All the rest, for whatever reason they give, simply are not the man God has in mind for me

God bless you! You will absolutely be in my prayers!

Gertie

Things like this, data from dating websites, firsthand experiences have lead me to believe a woman’s expiration date is right after 21. LOL. Men are free to have their opinions I guess. I hope I meet a man who will not leave me at age 40 for a much younger woman. Sadly this does happen. It terrifies me.

 

[TK421]

When it comes to sex, marriage, and family women have more to lose. With pregnancy the changes in her body. The idea men biologically will be predisposed to prefer younger more fertile women despite women in their age group preferring them. Men can easily walk out on their wives and marriages and seem to remarry much quickly. ONce a woman has a child that becomes her life and responsibility. Women only have so long to naturally conceive. If I wake up at 40 deciding to have a child, it may very be too late for women. Besides, the church is against invitro fertilizations. A man can decide as late as 45 they are tired of screwing around and find a nice, young woman to start a family with.

 

[CRATUS]

Please ask moderators to delete this post. I am very embarrassed by some of the things I have written. Hopefully someone take something good from this.

 

[hwriggles4]

Right. There are always creepy men. I’ve had creepy old guys in their 60s and 70s try to pick me up. For one thing, I don’t get “picked up” by anyone of any age, and second, if I were, it wouldn’t be a creepy old man old enough to be my grandfather who did it. You’re right, you just don’t pay any attention to guys like that no matter what their age.

Shallow people will always exist, but I agree with you that it doesn’t mean everyone is shallow. Plenty of men, especially those who’ve had bad experience with “high maintenance” diva types just want a GOOD woman.

Jane Seymour is past 65, I think. I saw a recent photo of her in a bikini, and she looked terrific. Same for Helen Mirren. And Meryl Streep doesn’t seem to age. I know Seymour is divorced, but apparently Mirren’s and Streep’s husbands still find them attractive because they seem to have happy stable marriages.

Don’t be sad about 30, Kendra. We’re still going to be young at thirty. Even 40 and 50 are young these days. Jennifer Aniston attracts lots of men, and she’s almost 46. Lots of people think Halle Berry is gorgeous, and she’s getting near fifty. She’s old enough to be a grandmother. Many women are grandmothers at Berry’s age.

Kendra and Lily:

As far as movie stars (and I’m a guy), Roselyn Sanchez looks good for someone in her early 40’s, but I don’t like her liberal politics. One of the prettiest women in Hollywood IMHO is Melina Kanakaredes from CSI:NY. Melina is around 45. Greek women for some reason age gracefully, and Melina is a family person with three children of her own and a supportive husband with whom she has had a long term marriage.

Filipina women tend to age gracefully as well. My old roommate married a Filipina lady that he met on a Catholic dating site. They have been married for ten years. A 45 year old Filipina woman is often mistaken for a 33 or 34 year old (seriously).

I tell my single friends that it is inappropriate for a 40+ year old man to pursue a 25 year old woman. Sadly, I have met a few guys who were close to 50 and looking for a 30 year old. Yes, as a man, that is creepy. It’s also a known fact that most men in their late 40’s will have little in common with a woman in her late 20’s, as far as music tastes, pop culture, history, etc.

 

[francisca]

Please ask moderators to delete this post. I am very embarrassed by some of the things I have written. Hopefully someone take something good from this.

I like this thread very much. Many of the opinions here are presented with humour but very sincere and true and honest, especially your opinion about how creepy the way older men look at younger women.

I’m in my 40s now, I find it very disturbing the way SOME older men look at women. I find some men are creepy even for my age. But no worries. We don’t have much worries of whatever they think. We continue living everyday, happy and healthy and praising the Lord! He’s our protection against all these creepy men.

 

[Petaro]

Nature is cruel. Men always want younger and more beautiful women. It seems like out shelf life only lasts for so long. Men are prophets and priests. Statistically men are more likely to leave their family and start a new one without looking back. Premarital sex has harsher consequences on women than men.

God calls us to rise above our human nature even though we are made to worry, fear, become angry, impatient. For some people the road to salvation is quite easy, others it is more difficult. God hates complaining. You should be grateful of everything you have even if you have VERY LITTLE. Some people are more successful than others.

God is harsher on his followers than others. People outside His Church can still go to heaven. Why does the truth always hurt? Why does God demand patience in a world that moves so quickly? Life seems so short though.

Poor didums. Real men don’t always seek after younger and more beautiful women. You find beauty in your old duck in every silly knowing look and conscious acquiescence in your own stupidity and humanity. Just as a real man protects his “girl” from her own imperfections and humanity. Sure men stray. Women stray and the modern divorce laws empower this ‘freedom’ from duty, honour and love, but we live in a fallen world.
I have never heard of a person whose road to salvation was easy. I complain to God all the time. It is my right. I am his son. He takes a fairly fatherly position of allowing me to overcome it myself a bit too often for my liking. However, I know He has His hand on my back, often a bit lower than I like. But it is there. God is not harsher on His followers than others. He just demands a higher standard. Truth never hurts those whose truly seek it; just most of us who demand our own. I don’t believe God demands patience. I believe He demands action. However He often finds fallow fields of indifference and laziness of spirit when he should find workers hard at the vineyard. Life is short. Get up. wipe the tears of self pity and show the courage of Mary to attain your true place as a women before your God.

 

[CRATUS]

And yet Halle Berry cannot seem to hold onto any man. I know some very average looking women who can.

This sounds borderline sexist. Can’t seem to hold onto any man? The same is not said for men who women-hop.

 

[Joie_de_Vivre]

This sounds borderline sexist. Can’t seem to hold onto any man? The same is not said for men who women-hop.

Men who sleep around are players, women who sleep around are pathetic and filthy whores with no sense of shame, doesn’t everyone know that?

This post represent the view of society and does not reflect the personal view of the poster.