Abu, the only sufficient reason I have for being Christian at all–for trusting in the Son of God or believing that there is a Son of God to trust in–comes from my experience as an evangelical Wesleyan Christian, enriched and deepened by my experience of sacramental, liturgical Christianity.
. . .
Hence my persistent desire to become Catholic. But the kind of argument you are making constitutes asking me to kick away the ladder I’m standing on. There is no reason whatever why I would seek to be Catholic, or would be Christian at all, if my experience as an evangelical is simply to be mistrusted and discarded.
Note: I’m not proclaiming fideism or saying that historical and other arguments don’t matter, only that by themselves they would be insufficient.
Edwin
Ah but Edwin, we are not saying that your experience of seeking or even knowing Christ when you were an evangelical is ‘simply to be mistrusted and discarded.’
Look at it this way. If the teachings of the Church are true regarding the Eucharist --that it is the True Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Jesus Christ, not a symbol, then all the years that you received it AS a symbol, as an Evangelical Christian, would not be considered wasteful or something you should consider shameful and ‘discard’. Were you receiving Christ as the fullness He is? Well no, but you were, insofar as you knew to the best of your ability, engaging in a communion with Him which you perceived as being full at that time. In doing this, you were (as St Augustine wrote) ‘stretching yourself’ to become ABLE to receive Him more fully. God was present among you, He may even have been more ‘present’ (although not Eucharistically so, but still indeed present) to you, a nonCatholic actively seeking to love and serve Him, than He may have been to Catholics and nonCatholics who just ‘go through the motions’ and are spending more time thinking about anything but God and just ‘warming the pews’. So no, your experiences as an Evangelical can be valuable and indeed praiseworthy and something we all can learn from.
But here is the thing that kind of separates Catholicism from many other Christian faiths. . . we encourage, as all Christians do, ‘thinking for oneself’ (because after all, God does not want ‘robots’ who just blindly lockstep along), but the goal of that thinking is to come to agreement with God’s teachings, not ‘reinvent the wheel’ or reject teachings because we don’t have ironclad testimonials signed by God, in triplicate. I mean, the reason we call our faith ‘faith’ and not ‘certitude’ is that we take that leap going from 'this is what is taught to be God’s message to us, we have various testimonies, do we accept them as a preponderance of evidence, and if they are asserted as authoritative by the Church, do we say, “Lord, THY will be done”. . .or do we say, "I just can’t accept this as authority, I need to have more certainty, I don’t trust that the Church is really speaking for God HERE. . "
Look, I’m a 58 year old woman. My gosh, if anybody here knows what women have been ‘taught’ over the last 50 or so years, in Catholic teachings, in secular ideas, in our schools (private and public), in our colleges, in our media, in our relationships with other. . .I do. I lived in the Northeast, the South, and the Southwest. I lived through the decades of experiment, the great societal changes, the whole 9 yards. I was at home with my children early, working as they grew, finally a single parent. Every possible point of Catholic teaching that you can think of, I have been at one point or another thrown every possible ‘interpretation thereof’ and then some. I’ve seen nearly everyone in my family succumb at one point or another to some point ‘against’ a Church teaching (not all the same one, either), reject that teaching, and within a matter of months to years, wind up rejecting not just the Catholic faith but Christianity itself. . .because instead of saying, "This is hard, but I trust Christ and His Church to have a view that transcends what is ‘popular’ today’, they all said, "You know, I truly believe the Church didn’t have X right. And gee, maybe they didn’t have Y right either. Or Z. Or A, B, C. . .come to think of it, the whole thing’s a sham. I’m a good person, I think for myself, and I would not worship a ‘god’ who would (name the teaching of the Church, from male only priests to ‘closed communion’ to ‘against gay marriage’ to pro-life from conception to natural death’ to ‘‘would MAKE a woman be punished with a baby’. . .etc etc etc) and MY god would support (name anything that goes against Catholic doctrine) so I’m going to choose and if God would PUNISH me for thinking for myself, then He’s not a god I want to worship anyway, even if there IS a god which by now I’m doubting’. . .
So Edwin, I know how slippery the road can be from really good, loving, seeking and caring people who took that ‘independent road’ honestly thinking that in doing so they were going to find the ‘real God’ (whom the Catholic Church had either blindly or deliberately ‘flouted’ by teachings X, Y, and Z). . .and wound up finding that they did not believe in any god at all beyond their own ‘choosing to think for themselves’.
Because ultimately we have to remember that the GOAL of thinking for ourselves is to find Truth (which is God). If He has already given us Truth, through the teachings of the Church, then our goal of thinking must ultimately result in us assenting to those teachings and not rejecting them and claiming that the rejection simply means we ‘thought for ourselves’.