Would I be committing a sin to leave my IUD in?

[Newbie2]

Yes, the IUD can harm the uterus but this usually only happens during insertion of the IUD or it usually happens within the first few days and hours of having the IUD. That is when perforation of the uterus is most likely to happen. After you’ve had it for a few months (like I have) that risk goes down dramatically. At least that’s the way I understand it.

Yes, I know that the only permissible form of birth control is Natural Family Planning. However, I am no longer using the IUD for birth control. In fact, the only reason I am keeping it in is so that my friend does not get angry with me. I am not sexually active anymore.

I see no reason why I should get rid of the IUD especially considering that my priest has no problem with me keeping it in.

Theologically, perhaps…but there are excellent medical reasons to have it removed.

Explain to him that you feel that you are less likely to have sex again if you take out the IUD because you would be scared of becoming pregnant. It’s like giving up chocolate, but carrying around a Hershey Bar inside your purse just in case you slip. It gives you a reason to slip whereas taking it out would be a reason to prevent you from slipping.

In addition to this, you are Catholic and even if you were to slip and have sex, the IUD causes an abortion. Tell him you can’t justify to yourself killing a person so that you can continue to live your life as you choose.

I would have used “stopping smoking” as an example. But it’s a good analogy.

Other reasons to get rid of it:

If you have the hormonal kind, it’s like being on the pill, so you can get moodiness, headaches, breakthrough bleeding, cramping, weight gain, plus scary stuff like blood clots.

Even if it’s not the hormonal kind, it makes the womb inhospitable by irritating it, and possibly causing a constant, long-term low-grade infection. That, to me, is the scariest thing.

Pelvic inflammatory disease is one thing to be very scared of. One’s uterus and oviducts can become permanently scarred and dysfunctional, leading to permanent infertility. Pelvic inflammatory disease, in my understanding, is chronic and frequently very painful.

The sin is in thwarting the life giving aspect of the sexual act. There is no sin if she is not sexually active. There may have been a sin when she first had it put in, but not in leaving it in.

It is much like a vasectomy. It is sinful to get one - it is not sinful to continue in the condition of having your tubes disconnected.

Yes, and your priest was most likely addressing this in the theological sense only. It’s not sinful to own a box of condoms, it’s not sinful to own a diaphragm, it’s not sinful to own a tube of spermacidal foam of jelly. Having intercourse with them, as well as an IUD, is contraceptive and therefor sinful.

Well, I am officially getting it removed. My gynecologist’s office scheduled me an appointment for Monday to talk to my doctor. I don’t know why they think I have to talk to him about it first though. I mean, why can’t they just schedule the removal and let it be done??? Anyway, I am definitely going through with removing it.

Good for you.

Your doctor needs to speak with you about the procedure, and what it means in terms of the potential risks of leaving it in vs. taking it out, as well as explaining that with it out, it doesn’t work. Seems like a waste of time, but he or she is required to give you such information in order to get your “informed consent” to have the procedure.

 

[SophieG]

A child does not come from outside as something added on to the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfillment.
I know this is a little off topic, but this sounds like it would be against adoption.

Yes, it does sort of, but I think it’s speaking about the creation of a child, rather than the addition of a child to the family, kwim? An adopted child was already created by other people, and he didn’t come from the outside in that relationship.

 

[Sparki777]

First of all, if you’re not using it, you should have it removed. Some women develop scar tissue from IUDs that cause health problems, and anyway, you might as well not put it off.

Second of all, your best friend’s reasoning that you might find a guy later to have sex with is an encouragement to commit sin. What kind of a best friend suggests that you sin with somebody down the road?

Third of all, a guy who has sex with a woman who has mental problems without the benefit of marriage or even a romantic relationship (best friends, not dating) is not PROTECTING her – he’s taking advantage of her.

Not only do I think you should not listen to this fellow, I think you should cool your relationship with him severely. He doesn’t sound like a good egg to me.

 

[Simonize]

Reading this thread I am totally surprised at how complicated the answer to this question has gotten. It is simple really…The object of the Catholic faith is to please God in all things. The IUD is wrong if you are sexually active because it is artificial birth control. It is wrong if you are not sexually active because it provides the near occasion of sin. Neither is pleasing to God. Sexual activity outside the context of marriage is also sinful. If you really want to please God and can have the device removed you should do so. True friends would understand. They may not like it. The may get mad. But they would still remain your friend. I commend your commitment to chastity. That is the right and holy thing to do.

 

[alacoque]

Well, I am officially getting it removed. My gynecologist’s office scheduled me an appointment for Monday to talk to my doctor. I don’t know why they think I have to talk to him about it first though. I mean, why can’t they just schedule the removal and let it be done??? Anyway, I am definitely going through with removing it.

Good for you! I think your decision is a very wise one, for your soul, mind and body. It will be good to put this chapter of your life behind you. And, it never hurts to get the medical perspective and (name removed by moderator)ut on these things, so don’t fret about the required check-in with your doctor. As long as you know what you want and why, and are exercising your right to make good medical decisions for yourself, talking about it with the doctor isn’t a bad thing.

The only thing that could be a downside is if a doctor takes the attitude that all young women are going to, sooner or later, be sexually active - an attitude that doesn’t respect or value chastity or abstinence, and tries to pressure a patient into keeping an IUD (or using contraception of another kind, etc). I don’t know if that would be the case here - but if that’s what happens, you will just have to be polite and respectful, but firm, in your decision to do and live what is right.

keep the faith !!

 

[Holly3278]

Good for you! I think your decision is a very wise one, for your soul, mind and body. It will be good to put this chapter of your life behind you. And, it never hurts to get the medical perspective and (name removed by moderator)ut on these things, so don’t fret about the required check-in with your doctor. As long as you know what you want and why, and are exercising your right to make good medical decisions for yourself, talking about it with the doctor isn’t a bad thing.

The only thing that could be a downside is if a doctor takes the attitude that all young women are going to, sooner or later, be sexually active - an attitude that doesn’t respect or value chastity or abstinence, and tries to pressure a patient into keeping an IUD (or using contraception of another kind, etc). I don’t know if that would be the case here - but if that’s what happens, you will just have to be polite and respectful, but firm, in your decision to do and live what is right.

keep the faith !!

I don’t think that will happen because I believe my gynecologist is a Christian gynecologist. After all, their office is always playing Christian music in the waiting room.

 

[Gabriella_San_S]

I don’t think that will happen because I believe my gynecologist is a Christian gynecologist. After all, their office is always playing Christian music in the waiting room.

Hello, dear Holly!
What a **great witness **you are to us! God is doing a **great work in your heart!
These are times that will test us all greatly, and you are going against the tide of neo-paganism (without God) and hedonism.(self idolatry)
In spite of your challenges (a heavy cross), you have humbled yourself to seek the Church’s wisdom with regard to your burdensome circumstances, and you have chosen rightly! God will bless you abundantly!

Through** frequent use of the sacraments, you will be given the grace to persevere and the Lord will use your fidelity to Him to win many souls** for His kingdom-beginning with your dear friend who cares for you.(although presently, he may lack insight into your** greatest good**-you can help him to see God’s plan
You will both be in my prayers.(by the way-I’ll bet your priest will benefit from your devout decision, too!)
Just a note: many Christian doctors are protestant and believe in artificial birth control-they may try to sway you….stand strong and you may be an instrument for his conversion.! Peace be with you, dear friend. **

 

[Holly3278]

Hello, dear Holly!
What a **great witness **you are to us! God is doing a great work in your heart!
These are times that will test us all greatly, and you are going against the tide of neo-paganism (without God) and hedonism.(self idolatry)
In spite of your challenges (a heavy cross), you have humbled yourself to seek the Church’s wisdom with regard to your burdensome circumstances, and you have chosen rightly! God will bless you abundantly!

Through** frequent use of the sacraments, you will be given the grace to persevere and the Lord will use your fidelity to Him to win many souls** for His kingdom-beginning with your dear friend who cares for you.(although presently, he may lack insight into your** greatest good**-you can help him to see God’s plan
You will both be in my prayers.(by the way-I’ll bet your priest will benefit from your devout decision, too!)
Just a note: many Christian doctors are protestant and believe in artificial birth control-they may try to sway you….stand strong and you may be an instrument for his conversion.! Peace be with you, dear friend.

It is only through God’s grace that I am able to do what I do. I give God all the glory.

 

[Gabriella_San_S]

It is only through God’s grace that I am able to do what I do. I give God all the glory.

Rightly so, friend! And it requires our “fiat” every moment of every day, like Mary’s.:byzsoc:

 

[Holly3278]

Rightly so, friend! And it requires our “fiat” every moment of every day, like Mary’s.:byzsoc:

Amen.

 

[Dee123]

It’s ok. I forgive you. :hug1:

That said, I think you are correct about why he wants me to keep the IUD in. I think he thinks that I will be tempted to have sex again in the future and I may very well be tempted to have sex again in the future. However, that is the reason why I want to get the IUD removed. I know that if I get the IUD removed, the temptation will be much less than it is now because I’ll be afraid of getting pregnant. I am going to try to convince him to not be mad at me if I do get the IUD removed because I would really like to have it removed.

You, as well as others, could assist me in convincing him to not be mad by giving me some reasons why having the IUD in is a bad idea. What are some of the bad side effects of the IUD? I am going to look that up but you all might know of some studies or something that I can’t find at first.

Holly, I think you are VERY WISE in your reasoning that you will be less tempted in the future to engage in intercourse without the IUD. That is the whole issue with contraception…if you have it on hand—or in your body–the temptation could be WAY too strong, irresistible in fact—because you know you may not get pregnant…You seem to know yourself better than your friend on this issue. Trust yourself here. He seems to believe you’re too weak…he doesn’t have much faith in you, does he?
In your head and your heart you seem to know the right thing to do…

Why would you want to have access to immediate birth control if you want to be chaste? That doesn’t make any sense? GET IT OUT!
Does it allow conception but prevent implantation? If that’s the case, if this happens, that’s an abortion…just like the pill. The pill in many cases actually allows conception but prevents implantation. Therefore, most women on the pill are actually having abortions that they’re unaware of. Afterall, life occurs at conception, not implantation. Implantation is needed to MAINTAIN this precious, sacred life…enougth said.

Do the right thing. You know what to do…

 

[Dee123]

The priest is correct that having the IUD is not itself sinful. The IUD is just an object and does no harm if you are not sexually active.

HOWEVER, if having the IUD would make it easier to give into temptation, that makes it a near occasion of sin. Near occasions of sin are to be avoided.

Your friend is well meaning but misguided. Unlike the pill, the **main action **of the IUD is to force an early abortion. there is no good reason to want that to happen.

I’m a bit surprised at your answer, no offence…But didn’t you know that the pill pretty much does the same thing? I know there are a few different kinds of pills, but basically, they allow conception but prevent implantation…that’s an abortion without anyone knowing about it…So, the pill also forces an early abortion…most people don’t know this though…how sad…

 

[Corki]

I’m a bit surprised at your answer, no offence…But didn’t you know that the pill pretty much does the same thing? I know there are a few different kinds of pills, but basically, they allow conception but prevent implantation…that’s an abortion without anyone knowing about it…So, the pill also forces an early abortion…most people don’t know this though…how sad…

I am sorry but you are mistaken. The **main action **of birth control pills is to stop ovulation. That is what the pills are designed to do. The **secondary action **of birth control pills is to make the lining of the uterous inhospitable to an embryo should the first action fail. That’s called break through ovulation. In the case that break through ovulation occurs, then, yes, the pill would cause an early abortion. But that is the “back up” action. In most cases, there is no feritilization because there is no ovulation. It is still incredibly sad that it happens at all but it is not the main action of birth control pills.

The IUD is different in that it does nothing to stop ovulation or conception (the new hormone IUDs might, but not regular IUDs). Their MAIN and ONLY action is to prevent the healthy implantation of a newly conceived human life.

 

[YipYupYep]

In fact, the only reason I am keeping it in is so that my friend does not get angry with me.

Friend? What kind of friend would ask this of you.

Your reproductive destiny is no ones business but yours. I believe that he has a secret agenda that is sexually motivated.

YYY

 

[alight192]

Yes, this is a sin to have an IUD for many reasons. You have already committed adultery by having intercourse with your friend because he is not your husband. So I hope you understand that you should repent for fornucation and adultery. God has a perfect plan for your life and you are made in his image. Your body is a holy temple that indwells the holy spirit. You are defiling the temple of God by having an IUD in your body that is called an abortifacient. Abortifacient is a chemical or mechanical contraceptive that’s primary purpose is to prevent implantation of an embroyo by causing the lining of the uterus to thin thus make implantation less likely and an early abortion will occur. There is no way of knowing how many times this can occur if you have sexual relations with your partner. Our bodies are not designed to go through this stress and trama month after month with out permanent reprecussions. The stress of a long term IUD on your uterus and cervix can cause your fertility to be compromised. All these problems for a little fleeting fun. The church teaching is that contracepting is against God. God’s plan is perfect and he wants the very best for us not because he is an unfair God but because he knows that these are not physically good for us and emotional they will cause consequences. Please consider your choices and if a man loved you he would not ask you to compromise your health with risky behaviors and unhealthy contraception. www.alightpc.org

 

[Dee123]

I am sorry but you are mistaken. The **main action **of birth control pills is to stop ovulation. That is what the pills are designed to do. The **secondary action **of birth control pills is to make the lining of the uterous inhospitable to an embryo should the first action fail. That’s called break through ovulation. In the case that break through ovulation occurs, then, yes, the pill would cause an early abortion. But that is the “back up” action. In most cases, there is no feritilization because there is no ovulation. It is still incredibly sad that it happens at all but it is not the main action of birth control pills.

The IUD is different in that it does nothing to stop ovulation or conception (the new hormone IUDs might, but not regular IUDs). Their MAIN and ONLY action is to prevent the healthy implantation of a newly conceived human life.

Actually, it depends on the type of birth control pill. The Combination Pill, containing both estrogen and progesterone, work to suppress ovulation. But, because today’s pill contains far less estrogen than earlier pills, ovulation still occurs from 2 % to 10% of the time. So, it seems that in 90- 98% of the cases, pregnancy will not occur, but in up to 10% of the cases, there will be a pregnancy and therefore an abortion.
Then there’s the Mini-Pill which contains only progestin. While this pill may prevent ovulation, usually ovulation still occurs. It works more towards thickening the cervical mucus to prevent fertilization…but, if it’s not taken at the same time every day, then this mechanism doesn’t work properly either. So, they think this mini-pill MAY also work by thinning the uterus, thereby preventing implantation AFTER pregnancy has occured. In effect, another abortion has taken place…They sure don’t seem to know exactly what this mini-pill does for certain…
So you can see, the pill doesn’t ALWAYS prevent pregnancy…and it depends on which pill the woman is taking…There are many, many more abortions taking place than anyone will ever know about…in fact, there’s a couple in the U.S., I forget their name, that has a ministry (it’s been running for years, but just recently they’ve gained more public recognition) for women who’ve been on the pill and have had many “silent”, unknown abortions…the woman in this ministry practiced contraception with the pill early on in her marriage and grieves more the many “silent” abortions she probably had…so sad.

Anyway, I hope this clears the air about the pill and what actually happens more than we know.

 

[newbetx]

No offense intended but I really don’t appreciate your harsh words against my friend. I know my friend’s motives for wanting me to keep the IUD in and they are pure motives. He knows me far better than you or anyone else on these forums and is only looking out for what is in my best interests.

Holly… if your friend is looking out for your best interests, why doesn’t he read the potential side effects of an IUD that “you don’t need anymore.” Your IUD does act as a mechanism to enable temptation for more sex. Please see this. There is real danger in your insistance in keeping the IUD. More than getting pregnant. More than having a complication. More than just having sex. YOU don’t know when the IUD might create an abortion because you “slipped.” I know it’s not intentional. But you are using the IUD as a crutch. You need to be able to stand on your own two feet.

Is your “friend” serious about this relationship? Have you or he understood why the church has these “outdated rules” about sex? Would you like to know? How do you want to be loved? Holly. This is very important to your well being. Trust me. 40 years ago, I was this guy. And my girlfriend was you. We thought we knew what we were doing. And we both ended up broken hearted. Look up Mary Beth Bonnaci and you can find the answers to your questions there.

 

[newbetx]

Well, I am officially getting it removed. My gynecologist’s office scheduled me an appointment for Monday to talk to my doctor. I don’t know why they think I have to talk to him about it first though. I mean, why can’t they just schedule the removal and let it be done??? Anyway, I am definitely going through with removing it.

Sorry. Missed this. But I stand by my recommendation to read up on why the Chruch teaches what it does about non-marital relations. If you don’t find a man that agrees with this view once he understands TOB, then maybe you need to pass on him.

 

[PeteO]

After 2 threads on this site where there was the stated intent to get an IUD removed, I’m beginning to believe there is merely a “look at me!”-give-me-attention mentality going on.

A best friend who was taking sexual advantage of a girl with mental problems because she had an IUD is not a friend.

I fear that this young girl, even though she claims this boy is her best friend, does not know her friend at all. I probably know your friend better than you do. I used to be that kind of a guy.

I’m sure she is sincere about her desire to be chaste, but I can almost guarantee that after this young man cannot find some other female to be unchaste with, he will return to this young girl and pressure her again.

I can tell you that rampant modern feminism and their push for birth control made it far easier for me to objectify and use women sexually, women like this are a dime a dozen today- but real men seek women of virtue, which frankly, are very difficult to find in america.

 

[alacoque]

After 2 threads on this site where there was the stated intent to get an IUD removed, I’m beginning to believe there is merely a “look at me!”-give-me-attention mentality going on.

A best friend who was taking sexual advantage of a girl with mental problems because she had an IUD is not a friend.

I fear that this young girl, even though she claims this boy is her best friend, does not know her friend at all. I probably know your friend better than you do. I used to be that kind of a guy.

I’m sure she is sincere about her desire to be chaste, but I can almost guarantee that after this young man cannot find some other female to be unchaste with, he will return to this young girl and pressure her again.

I can tell you that rampant modern feminism and their push for birth control made it far easier for me to objectify and use women sexually, women like this are a dime a dozen today- but real men seek women of virtue, which frankly, are very difficult to find in america.

Pete: Thank you very much for your honest and sincere post here on the forum! Nothing like a report and assessment from one who knows the issue! And, kudos to you for your honesty, which, to some degree, sacrifices your own ‘image’ in order to serve Truth and the benefit of the souls of these young women. (This is a real man!)

Unfortunately (even though I don’t have the experience or ‘inside view’ that you do) I believe what you say and agree with your assessment…it has the ring of truth ! So, thank you, again, for posting your comments…a very, very, important message - for those who will really read and take it to heart.

God bless you !!