We may be obliged to shape our consciences to the teachings of the Church, but what is a Catholic to do if he CAN NOT agree. I know all, or at least most, of the arguments from both sides and the best answer I can come up with is that the issue of human sexuality is not as black and white as the Church would have us think. There’s a lot of gray area and I believe there is room for development. I have certainly prayed for guidance in this area for a LONG time and this is where i’m at right now. And for most people, homosexuality is just something they see on the news, read in the paper, or debate on forums but for me, well…i’m gay so it’s very much a reality. There’s so much I would love to do in the Church, but I can’t and it wouldn’t make it any easier to walk around pretending that I believe there is something disordered about who I am. I don’t mean to sound so depressing, because i’m actually happier than i’ve been in years. But I do truly love my faith and the fact that I can not participate in many of the things I want to be apart of is certainly a point of sadness for me. I’m asked all the time why in the world I stay with Rome. Why not go to the welcoming and affirming Episcopalian Church? Been there, done that. But the Eucharist, more that anything else, is what convinced me I could go nowhere else. The Church is my home. I’m a fish out of water any place else.