Would you permit your child to attend a birthday party of an ILLEGITIMATE CHILD???

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Would you permit your child to attend a birthday party of an ILLEGITIMATE CHILD???
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You mean you wouldn’t permit your child to attend my birthday party?
 
First, let me say I didn’t vote, because the only 😉 child I have has:D 4 feet & meows a lot.
What I do want to say is something my grandmother used to say that bears on this issue: There are no illegitimate children, only some illegitimate parents.
Think about it…She was a smart lady!!
 
What if the illegitimate child lived in a house with fornicating adults? What about that? Or, had two mommies??? :eek:
 
I really hate that term.
I was born out of wedlock and adopted, my adopted sister was the same. My husband’s mom was pregnant with him before she was married. My best friend’s mom was 15 when she gave birth to her, and my best friend has a 15 year old daughter whom she gave birth to at 17.
I’d apply the same standard that I would use with any other child’s family. If I knew the parent(s) and felt my daughter would be safe and well supervised. If I felt my daughter wouldn’t be exposed to a morally questionable atmosphere- drinking, drugs, profanity, R-rated movies ect. That can be found in any type of family.
 
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chevalier:
You mean you wouldn’t permit your child to attend my birthday party?
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For the record, the initial post did not advocate any position, it just asked q question. It was, no doubt, a follow-up to another thread on letting the child attend a party at the home of active homosexuals (This is my dad, Daryl and this is my other dad, Daryl)

The point is, where is the line drawn? I for one would have to weight a lot of factors. If it was a case of, “This is my mom, Jane, and this is my dad, (What is his name again, Mom”) where any sort of blatant and confusing sin was being flaunted, I might not allow it. Depending on the age and closeness of the friend I might allow it but with close personal supervision, say 5 feet.
 
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WhiteDove:
What if the illegitimate child lived in a house with fornicating adults? What about that? Or, had two mommies??? :eek:
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I think that most people look at the supervision that would be involved and the age of their child. If ever I was worried, I stayed at the party and that did happen to me one time where I wasn’t sure so I stayed to help with the party games. I thin the main concern is safety at a party, because i doubt that anyone would be talking about sexual preferences in front of children.

Now if there were drugs around, I wouldn’t even stay with my child! We all have our limits!
 
All children are legit in God’s eyes, to call them “illegit” is very rude and condesending.
 
By even asking the question on this poll it implies there IS a problem of a child going to a birthday party of an “illegitimate” child.
I find it offensive to even ask such a question.

Care more about being a good witness of Jesus’ love in the eyes of your child rather than operating out of fear. Jesus said, “Perfect love casts out all fear.”

You never know how your acceptance and unconditional love of another child might be the seed planted and watered for his/her conversion. Who else to show Christ’s love but YOU?
“Bloom where you are planted…”
 
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pnewton:
For the record, the initial post did not advocate any position, it just asked q question. It was, no doubt, a follow-up to another thread on letting the child attend a party at the home of active homosexuals (This is my dad, Daryl and this is my other dad, Daryl)

The point is, where is the line drawn? I for one would have to weight a lot of factors. If it was a case of, “This is my mom, Jane, and this is my dad, (What is his name again, Mom”) where any sort of blatant and confusing sin was being flaunted, I might not allow it. Depending on the age and closeness of the friend I might allow it but with close personal supervision, say 5 feet.
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Dear Newton,
You hit the nail squarely on the head, my friend. I started this thread in response to the one on sending a child to a birthday party at a gay household in order to get folks to think.

I notice that most folks have no trouble with the fact that the parents may still be living in an irregular situation, but above all want to protect the innocent child. Yet, on the Gay thread, there is much less concern for the child.

I interpert this to mean that exposing their children to heterosexual sin doesn’t bother folks as much as homosexual sin, even though the likelihood of their child commiting heterosexual sin is far far greater.

I find it interesting the emotional reaction to the word ‘illegitimate’. Now, I’m 47 years old and when I was a child the word was used to signify a child born out of wedlock, and the word ‘gay’ meant cheerful and happy. Back in the 50’s and 60’s there was quite a stigma attached to it, abortion was illegal, and usually people such as myself, conceived and born out of wedlock, were surrendered for adoption. Adoption, btrw, did give them the legal status of legitimacy.

Nowadays, folks don’t want to stigmatize out of wedlock births. There are several reasons why, I believe.
  1. Immoral folks want sexual freedom and don’t want anyone making them feel guilty.
  2. Illegitimacy is totally commonplace. Everyone knows someone, has a friend or reletive, or they themselves have had a child out of wedlock. Once something becomes personal like that, folks tend to soften their stance.
  3. Abortion is legal and moral folks know that the alternative is to kill the baby.
  4. Nowadays, personal responsibilty is less important, and our culture preaches tolerance as a higher ideal, and dislikes making people feel guilty.
As for me, my choice on the poll was that I would assess different factors about the living situation of the child in question, the age of the children, etc. Is this a child that I want to encourage my child to socialize with? My standard would be no different than for any child. Generally, I think birthday parties are harmless no matter who the parents are, gay or straight, married or not. They last a couple of hours and aren’t going to impact a child’s life.
 
White Dove, unfortunately, I have the “number” on some of those posters on that particular thread. Especially the one who was posting about that poor kindergartner who had only two kids show up at his birthday party. This mother didn’t even take the time to think maybe the kid has an emotional disability or is autistic.
Seriously, the majority of those on that thread are SO IN love with their convictions that they lack the ability to feel compassion for another human being even an innocent child. I can not be convinced that this is what Jesus taught.
 
I believe Christ said that we needed to become like children in order to enter the Kingdom.

What bothers me is the double standard I’m seeing here. As you very well know from our time on Belief Net, I’m not naive as to the agenda and methodology of the gay community and their attempt to exert undue influence on our culture. But, us heterosexuals have nothing to boast about in the morality dept, so I’d like some of these homophobs here on CAF to start attacking the real problem of sexual sin, which is by and large heterosexual, hurts women and children on a grand scale, has destroyed the institution of marraige at it’s foundations, and the morals of our youth. 😦
 
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WhiteDove:
Here are the results on the gay party. Compare the results and you’ll see they are startlingly different…

View Poll Results: Would you permit your child to attend a party in a gay household?
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The two polls are not comparable. For example, the other poll did not include an option like " I would never want to punish an innocent child!". A person can think most anything about the issue and still go for that statement.

Also, the presence of an “illegitimate child” does not carry any particular information about the type of adults at the party, but the specification “gay household” probably does.

However, I suspect that people around here are more sensitive to the issue of out of wedlock gay sex than they are to the issue of out of wedlock man/woman sex. Perhaps because they think there is still some hope that the former can be squashed.
 
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WhiteDove:
Dear Newton,
You hit the nail squarely on the head, my friend. I started this thread in response to the one on sending a child to a birthday party at a gay household in order to get folks to think.

I notice that most folks have no trouble with the fact that the parents may still be living in an irregular situation, but above all want to protect the innocent child. Yet, on the Gay thread, there is much less concern for the child.

I interpert this to mean that exposing their children to heterosexual sin doesn’t bother folks as much as homosexual sin, even though the likelihood of their child commiting heterosexual sin is far far greater.

I find it interesting the emotional reaction to the word ‘illegitimate’. Now, I’m 47 years old and when I was a child the word was used to signify a child born out of wedlock, and the word ‘gay’ meant cheerful and happy. Back in the 50’s and 60’s there was quite a stigma attached to it, abortion was illegal, and usually people such as myself, conceived and born out of wedlock, were surrendered for adoption. Adoption, btrw, did give them the legal status of legitimacy.

Nowadays, folks don’t want to stigmatize out of wedlock births. There are several reasons why, I believe.
  1. Immoral folks want sexual freedom and don’t want anyone making them feel guilty.
  2. Illegitimacy is totally commonplace. Everyone knows someone, has a friend or reletive, or they themselves have had a child out of wedlock. Once something becomes personal like that, folks tend to soften their stance.
  3. Abortion is legal and moral folks know that the alternative is to kill the baby.
  4. Nowadays, personal responsibilty is less important, and our culture preaches tolerance as a higher ideal, and dislikes making people feel guilty.
As for me, my choice on the poll was that I would assess different factors about the living situation of the child in question, the age of the children, etc. Is this a child that I want to encourage my child to socialize with? My standard would be no different than for any child. Generally, I think birthday parties are harmless no matter who the parents are, gay or straight, married or not. They last a couple of hours and aren’t going to impact a child’s life.
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Dear WhiteDove,

I think perhaps the question you should have asked is “Would you permit your child to attend a party in a household of two shacking up adults”?

A child can still be technically ILLEGITIMATE (I hate that word) if the mother married a man other than the child’s biological father and the stepfather didn’t adopt this child (I may be wrong). Or the child may still be technically labled illegitimate if her biological father and mother never married but lived together (commonlaw). I’m not really sure how that works.

I would let my children attend a party of an illegitimate child if the mother wasn’t shacking up with some guy.

What about an illegitimate child that is being raised by a single mother or a single father or the grandparents? As long as the single mother or single father are not shacking up with someone (whether it’s the biological parent or not) there would not be a scandalous situation presented to my child. I

The difference between attending a party of an illegitimate child and attending a party in a household of two active homosexuals is like comparing apples to oranges.

There have been a couple occasions where I sent a child of mine to a birthday party of a child whose parents were not married in one case we thought the mother was single and after a while at the birthday party the mother’s boyfriend arrived. The couple was very physically affectionate towards each other and they mentioned that they were living together. This is a bad example for the other children not to mention the poor child. We stayed for the remainder of the party but I did not expose my child to this situation again. In the other case the child’s parents were not married (commonlaw) but had been living together for eight or ten years and had three children together. We never knew they were not married because the mother always responded to Mrs. Smith (not her real name) the last name of the father. In this case they were not causing scandal because no one knew about the situation. Not that it makes it less of a sin but it wasn’t visible.

Two homosexuals that are referred to as “My two Daddies” or “My two Mommies” or my "Mom and Dad "when the couple is of the same sex is are very Bad examples for my children to be exposed to and it is very visible where as the other situations are not.

Imagine if you knew six or seven of these particular families with lifestyle situation such as these, that would be six or seven parties a year to leave a lasting impression on your child after awhile it would have an impact your child would come to think of these situations as normal.

God bless
 
Yes, it wouldn’t bother me to let my child attend a party of an illegitimate child. The child is totally innocent in the matter, and I would in no way make his/her life more difficult because of a mistake made by the parents.

Karen
 
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GloriaPatri4:
Dear WhiteDove,

I think perhaps the question you should have asked is “Would you permit your child to attend a party in a household of two shacking up adults”?

God bless
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I did give that as an option on the Poll but only two people picked it. So, your argument doesn’t hold water.

No, clearly, inspite of the fact that hetereosexual sin is a far greater threat to our children, most of whom will not ever suffer the temptation of homosexuality, the people here have a far stronger reaction to homosexual sin. They would punish a child who is already handicapped in life by growing up in a gay household. But, they have no problem with letting their child go to the party of a child whose parents are unmarried, who was born into that and still lives in that, inspite of the birth of said child.
 
Read the Poll folks. The question was:Would you permit your child to attend a birthday party of an ILLEGITIMATE CHILD???

The second answer is:
Not if the parents were living in sin.

Only 2 people checked that answer. Either no one here can read properly, or people are putting forth justifications regarding their distaste for homosexuality vs objective ethical consideration.

My argument is, let’s apply the same ethical standard to homosexual vs heterosexual sin. In fact, I daresay, we heterosexuals have even less excuses for sexual sin, with the outlet of sacramental marriage available to us.
 
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WhiteDove:
I believe Christ said that we needed to become like children in order to enter the Kingdom.

What bothers me is the double standard I’m seeing here. As you very well know from our time on Belief Net, I’m not naive as to the agenda and methodology of the gay community and their attempt to exert undue influence on our culture. But, us heterosexuals have nothing to boast about in the morality dept, so I’d like some of these homophobs here on CAF to start attacking the real problem of sexual sin, which is by and large heterosexual, hurts women and children on a grand scale, has destroyed the institution of marraige at it’s foundations, and the morals of our youth. 😦
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Listen, I really got to your other poll late, and then I voted no (gay household party). When I read all the heated debate and accusations I didn’t post. My reasons were innocent enough and not homophobic. I really don’t want to be anywhere near the lifestyle. I have a friend that recently came out and divorced and left her heterosexual life behind. I still keep in touch but find it very difficult. I don’t think that you can judge us from an poll that you put together. Now that I find people posting results I don’t think I will be inclined to vote again. I will only explain myself if you know what I mean. I thought everyone on the other thead got nasty, mean, and I didn’t want to take part.

I am very careful with my children. Mostly they are older now and of course are exposed to many things. I avoided many situations when they were growing up. I avoided households with too many excesses, drinking or otherwise. Even swearing turned me off. However, I never kept my child from a party. I said in this poll that I might allow them to go, but would stay if I felt uncomfortable in any way. My children are entrusted to me by God and I take is seriously.

I don’t like the tactic of posting results and calling me homophobic. I don’t think you need to be lecturing us. Sorry, just my own opinion. It seems like a trap.
 
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