C
_Christopher
Guest
Compiled from a thread at the OBOB forum…
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You speak English as a second language (after Latin)…
You knew how to recite a prayer in Latin before you could recite a poem in English.
Your response to even the slightest teeniest little difficulty is, “I’ll say a Novena.”
Of your 14 children, the girls have names like "Mary Elizabeth, Ann Bernadette Theresa,"and the boys have names like “Francis Xavier” and “Karol Wojtyla.”
You know all the words to “Tantum Ergo” and “O Salutaris” (without sneaking a look in the back of the missalette).
Your doorbell plays “Ave Maria.”
You think your soul resembles a milk bottle.
When your house burns down, your car gets totaled, you lose your job, and you end up in traction in the hospital, you say, “Let’s Offer It Up.”
You have so many statues in your front yard the UPS guy can’t get through to your door.
You don’t believe in that Rapture stuff, but you’re eagerly awaiting The Warning.
Your idea of a really fun weekend is a two-day Scott Hahn conference explicating the first ten verses of the Book of Philemon.
When you retire, you plan to enter a Trappist monastery.
Your ham radio is permanently tuned to Radio Vaticano.
You wear so many medals, you jingle when you walk.
You surreptitiously put Green Scapulars and Holy Cards in the desk drawers of all your non-Catholic colleagues.
You can remember the Baltimore Catechism.
You’re too young to remember the Baltimore Catechism, but you’ve got it memorized anyway.
Your idea of a really swinging time is a May Crowning Procession.
Your well water has been blessed by a priest.
When you go to bed at night, you leave room on your pillow for your Guardian Angel.
You go to Eucharistic Adoration at least twice a day.
You aren’t satisfied with the free plastic rosaries in the Narthex.
You debate the merits of wooden or crystal rosaries.
You Constantly tell your non-Catholic friends the great things Mary does for you and all the lost things St. Anthony has helped you find.
You are thinking of making a shrine in your house.
You always want to point out that the word Christmas means the Mass of Christ.
You genuflect before you enter the row of seats at the theatre.
You have been caught whispering in your sleep, “There’s no place like Rome, there’s no place like Rome.”
And the number one way you can know you are a Catholic…
You have such large collection of Chick tracts that you don’t have to buy toilet paper anymore.
–
You speak English as a second language (after Latin)…
You knew how to recite a prayer in Latin before you could recite a poem in English.
Your response to even the slightest teeniest little difficulty is, “I’ll say a Novena.”
Of your 14 children, the girls have names like "Mary Elizabeth, Ann Bernadette Theresa,"and the boys have names like “Francis Xavier” and “Karol Wojtyla.”
You know all the words to “Tantum Ergo” and “O Salutaris” (without sneaking a look in the back of the missalette).
Your doorbell plays “Ave Maria.”
You think your soul resembles a milk bottle.
When your house burns down, your car gets totaled, you lose your job, and you end up in traction in the hospital, you say, “Let’s Offer It Up.”
You have so many statues in your front yard the UPS guy can’t get through to your door.
You don’t believe in that Rapture stuff, but you’re eagerly awaiting The Warning.
Your idea of a really fun weekend is a two-day Scott Hahn conference explicating the first ten verses of the Book of Philemon.
When you retire, you plan to enter a Trappist monastery.
Your ham radio is permanently tuned to Radio Vaticano.
You wear so many medals, you jingle when you walk.
You surreptitiously put Green Scapulars and Holy Cards in the desk drawers of all your non-Catholic colleagues.
You can remember the Baltimore Catechism.
You’re too young to remember the Baltimore Catechism, but you’ve got it memorized anyway.
Your idea of a really swinging time is a May Crowning Procession.
Your well water has been blessed by a priest.
When you go to bed at night, you leave room on your pillow for your Guardian Angel.
You go to Eucharistic Adoration at least twice a day.
You aren’t satisfied with the free plastic rosaries in the Narthex.
You debate the merits of wooden or crystal rosaries.
You Constantly tell your non-Catholic friends the great things Mary does for you and all the lost things St. Anthony has helped you find.
You are thinking of making a shrine in your house.
You always want to point out that the word Christmas means the Mass of Christ.
You genuflect before you enter the row of seats at the theatre.
You have been caught whispering in your sleep, “There’s no place like Rome, there’s no place like Rome.”
And the number one way you can know you are a Catholic…
You have such large collection of Chick tracts that you don’t have to buy toilet paper anymore.
good one!
