Young People Leaving the Catholic Faith

[Sarcelle]

This is why I do not get some people still propose the growing huge Catholic families to counteract the growing Muslim population.

It is one thing to be exhort married couples to be open to life and another to exhort married couples to have as many children as possible to counteract the growing Muslim population. Children born to Catholic couples are not guaranteed to remain in the faith.

 

[Padres1969]

This is 100% a sign of the parents, especially the fathers

For example, in my parish, there are approx 90 kids per “grade” from first grade to 6th for Religious education (we confirm in 6th grade).

But there are NO where near that number who attend Mass on Sunday (our Religious Ed programs for kids are on Tuesday & Wednesday nights, without a Sunday option)

There are many people who bring their kids to Child Faith Formation classes, but never bring their kids to Mass (except maybe on Easter or Christmas). Perhaps the parents promised their own parents that the kids would receive the sacraments, or something … so they bring them to Child Faith Formation, but not to mass.

In my parish, I don’t know what the % is, but in speaking to many of the Catechists, I know it’s a large number of the kids.

Our parish also has a pre-school, and a large number of them do not attend Mass, and same with the regional Catholic elementary school… most of the kids who attend the regional Catholic Elementary School are from my parish and a majority of them do not attend Mass on Sunday.

Why? Their parents.

So these kids are not leaving the faith on their own, per se. Their parents taught them nothing of the faith, no love of the faith, no love of God, etc… They just see Church as extra schooling. If they are not coming to mass, then it’s a safe bet that there isn’t any Rosary at home, no Grace before meals, no Confession, etc.

13 is a good average age of when Confirmation takes place… and many kids who have parents who don’t attend Mass will rarely ever attend Mass after their Confirmation (which is very sad).

Further proof of this, I was in a used book store, where I have seen at least twice Confirmation gift Bibles with kids names written in them… the Bibles were in the used book store only 2-4 years after the kid’s confirmation

When I was a kid, CCD was considered a “lab,” you main faith formation was in your house. But I was born in the late 1970s, grew up in the 1980s and early 1990s. So my parents knew very little, and my dad never attended Mass.

The only way to fight this is with hard nose faith formation, esp for the boys. Because, as the start of my post hinted, if dads are not engaged in their faith; chances are VERY high that the children will not be either.

Given my own history I’d actually agree to a large extent with your statement. I don’t think it’s all on the fathers, but their presence in the faith, or lack there of can be a big part of it. And indeed a lot of my own childhood mirrors what you are saying. I was raised about half a decade after you it seems in the '80’s and '90’s. But similarly Religious Education was primarily confined to religious classes in school (I went to Catholic School). My mom was the primary driver behind going to church when we did go as a family, my dad was primarily a special event or major feast attendee. We never attended confession as a family (the only confessions I ever went to were school sponsored ones or on my own when I was an older teen). And yes church was primarily seen as extra schooling to an extent, and it didn’t help that our parish (at least the one we attended though I found out last week it wasn’t the parish we were “supposed” to be attending) was attached to our school.

Strange thing about my dad though, despite his very lax attendance, it always struck me that he also never received the Catholic Eucharist, not once, that I can recall from childhood through to the present day when he did attend. His reasoning was that he hadn’t been to confession so he wasn’t going to go up for communion. Yet he never went for confession either. But his Catholic upbringing and I’d hazard to say faith, won’t allow him to receive in a state of mortal sin (which he’s lived in for at least the last 30 years). My mom on the other hand always went up despite also never having gone to Saturday confession that I’m aware of.

Some of this was on my mind when I posted this thread because my own daughter was baptized this past Sunday. And my parents attended and seemed more pleased by it than I expected, my dad even going so far as to tell me, “good job.” They were of course perplexed by a few things at my Episcopal Church, such as the woman priest assisting the presiding priest or that we profess to believe in “the holy catholic Church” during our reaffirming the Apostles Creed during the baptismal covenant despite not being the Roman Catholic Church. But they also seemed pleased that my daughter was baptized simply because it’s quote, “what you do.” We were discussing the fact that among those we know, baptism is quickly becoming the exception, not the rule (Catholic or otherwise). Where my wife not being baptized a generation ago was an oddity, it’s starting to seem like my daughter being baptized in her generation is now the oddity. My dad had an interesting spin on that in that he thinks the biggest issue with my Millennial generation, is that we don’t believe in anything anymore. Not God, and not even each other far too often in his words. Hence why they were surprised and pleased it was still important to me that I baptize my daughter.

And while I was glad they were glad, it also struck me as odd, and I said as much to my dad. That he was a pretty “bad” Catholic during our childhood (and through to today) and I gave a few examples and how could they have expected that I would still be a faithful enough Christian to want to baptize my kid. And his response was that how “good” they were shouldn’t necessarily matter. He didn’t elaborate on that, but it is something I’ve been pondering since Sunday brunch.

 

[truetofaith]

The Catholic Church considers one responsible for their own salvation once they achieve the age of reason and have the ability to sin and repent do they not? I’d argue that if the Church feels they’re old enough to be responsible for their own soul’s well being through sin and the sacraments, they’d also be able to discern whether they care about their soul vis-a-vis being members of the Catholic Church.

If not, then why does the Church put the eternal salvation of a person in their hands at a time when they’re not really capable of making decisions about their eternal salvation?

I thought the age of reason at 7 yrs. meant the child now knows right from wrong, not that they’re old enough to decide whether there is a God or not or if they want to stop attending Church.

 

[pete_29]

While I’m not Catholic, I did find this article about Catholicism and those young people who leave it interesting personally seeing as I was one of those that left the church before I was 25 like those that were interviewed for this study.

osv.com/Article/TabId/493/ArtMID/13569/ArticleID/20512/Young-people-are-leaving-the-faith-Heres-why.aspx

One set of numbers that struck me as pretty damning of Catholic formation, particularly post Confirmation, was that 86% of the 1 in 3 young Catholics who leave the Church before they’re 25, do so before they’re 17. With 23% of those that leave dropping out of the Church by age 10 and a whopping 63% leaving between 10 and 17 years of age. Average age of leaving the Catholic Church was approximately 13 years of age. I always figured it was mainly high school and college age young adults who left the church, but it turns out far more leave far younger than I ever figured. And of those 1 in 3 young Catholics who leave the Church, 1 in 5 do so because they no longer believe in God, 11% because they no longer agree with organized religion, and a whopping 50% because they no longer agree with Catholic teaching.

And worrisome for the Catholic Church, only 13% could ever see themselves returning to the Church.

Pretty happy about it aren’t you

 

[Padres1969]

I thought the age of reason at 7 yrs. meant the child now knows right from wrong, not that they’re old enough to decide whether there is a God or not or if they want to stop attending Church.

Well if they’re through the sacraments of initiation, meaning they’ve been fully initiated into the faith, why would anyone assume they can’t decide for themselves what they believe? I mean they are fully Catholic at that point are they not?

It’s one of the reasons I’ve always been perplexed by the desire to move Confirmation back to it’s traditional earlier time. It would seem counter intuitive to want to end the sacraments of initiation even earlier, and leave their faith entirely in the hands of an even more immature person than is already being done to apparently negative result.

 

[Padres1969]

Pretty happy about it aren’t you

Wow, that was an incredibly uncharitable statement . Talk about assuming the worst about someone. I don’t know what I’ve done to earn your blatant disrespect but I apologize for it.

And no I’m not happy about it. 6% of any Christian denomination no longer believing in God before they’re 25 (and apparently even younger) is tragic for all Christians. And I highly doubt Catholicism is the only Christian Church suffering from this affliction either. This particular study just happened to focus on Catholicism. And as I said having been one of those like this study focused on I found it to be interesting personally. Though my own journey apparently was not the average seeing as I left the RCC much later than then the apparent average age of 13 (for comparison I didn’t leave until I was 21).

 

[Michael_Francis]

*http://i66.photobucket.com/albums/h...umblr_lnj2s28sf21qm00hqo1_500_zps595a21a1.gif
Moved to Apologetics since this is not really a Family Life topic and this is as close to where it belongs as possible.

Be advised that lack of charity will not be allowed and all Forum Rules and guidelines apply to this discussion. Two posts have already been removed.

I suggest that all concerned take the time to carefully review this link before posting to this thread.

Stay on topic and carry on then…*

 

[Cheiron]

When you read about all the miracles in the Bible…how can anyone not believe?

Old Testament miracles but especially the miracles of Jesus were experienced by thousands of people and even His enemies had to admit the lame walk, the blind see & the dead were raised!

Performing miracles were nothing new. Israel was swarming with prophets at the time: Theudas, Dositheos, Simon Magus, an unknown Egyptian (Acts 21:38). The philosopher Celsus (2nd century), among the first to criticize Christianity, thought Jesus belonged to the same category: the apocalyptic prophet who established his credentials with wonder working instead of learning and teaching scripture. The oldest criticism of Jesus is that he was a magician and false prophet.

I think none of these people are prophets, because miracles don’t occur.

 

[PraiseChrist]

Hi. Resident annoying young guy.

I think that at 13 and on, if you don’t have a strong formation, you will have questions, and if you don’t get answers, or if the wrong person provides them(atheist provides “answer” to God question), people start falling away.

I know two Catholics my age who were raised without major formation(as was I), but they found Zeitgeist, and I found CAF.

I was lucky to find the right place. I would be in a dark dark spot right now without my faith. I was depressed for a month doubting the faith, imagine if I had fallen away. The emptiness would eat me alive.

That’s also why I think people return to the Church in their 20s, after college. They feel the void. They go back to truth.

Yeah I agree with this. Faith comes so easily when younger, and public schools don’t really talk much about it before 4th or 5th grade. Then, once we get older, we just assume that it was made up. I agree that Catholic Answers (and forums) helped to defend the Faith against objections, and probably saved me from atheism

 

[PraiseChrist]

Hi. Resident annoying young guy.

I think that at 13 and on, if you don’t have a strong formation, you will have questions, and if you don’t get answers, or if the wrong person provides them(atheist provides “answer” to God question), people start falling away.

I know two Catholics my age who were raised without major formation(as was I), but they found Zeitgeist, and I found CAF.

I was lucky to find the right place. I would be in a dark dark spot right now without my faith. I was depressed for a month doubting the faith, imagine if I had fallen away. The emptiness would eat me alive.

That’s also why I think people return to the Church in their 20s, after college. They feel the void. They go back to truth.

Yeah I agree with this. Faith comes so easily when younger, and public schools don’t really attack it much before 4th or 5th grade. Then, once we get older, we just assume that it was made up. I agree that Catholic Answers (and forums) helped to defend the Faith against objections, and probably prevented me from becoming atheist

 

[Padres1969]

Yeah I agree with this. Faith comes so easily when younger, and public schools don’t really attack it much before 4th or 5th grade. Then, once we get older, we just assume that it was made up. I agree that Catholic Answers (and forums) helped to defend the Faith against objections, and probably prevented me from becoming atheist

It’s funny you say that. I went through an early crisis of faith in the 4th grade when I finally accepted things like Santa weren’t real (what can I say, I really wanted to believe in Santa) and by extension I started to question all the “imaginary people” out there I’d been told about over the years like Christ and God. Because if the Easter Bunny, Santa, the Tooth Fairy, etc… aren’t real, how can I believe that any other of these unseen entities are real either.

Got past it eventually, at least for a while until college. But I very nearly became one of those very early fall away statistics this study cited if not for a good sit down talk with my parents. Of course that was probably the one and only formation talk we ever had in the home and obviously I did fall away, from Christianity completely before 25 ultimately (at 21).