Younger women with older men

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I know a married couple in the town where I live who had 10 children spread out over 22 years and the neighbor across the alley had 6 children spread out over 21 years and the neighbor was 47 years old when his last child was born and everything turned out ok.

Albert
 
I know a ton of people who had NO trouble in their pregnancies and I also know a ton of people who had very serious situations arise, you can’t predict the future, you can’t know how many children you’ll have, you can hope, you can pray but you can’t know for sure and you don’t know how long you’ll live and you can’t say what type of parent you’ll be or if you’ll be in great shape when your 70. I’m 30 years old and have four kids and I’m exhausted, no joke, at the end of the day I am wiped out sir, if I had to keep having babies and run a house run a family I would lose my mind, each of my children needs alot of attention, they all want your time and they all deserve it, so you try to balance that out in a day along with household chores, running kids to school and various activiites, I fall into bed at the end of the day, and guess what? I have had little time for myself in the last 11 years, and that is fine, I expected that when I had kids but it is hard some days even with the help of my spouse and just because some people you know had no troulbe having kids does not mean once you have them its easy, if you are lucky enough to be blessed with kids it is much, much more than just making them and giving birth to them, get that much in your head, it is a life long commitment, never ending, 24 hour a day being there for them, it takes so much more than making and birthing, thats the easy part, the hard part is the next 18+ years, your so caught up in the making babies, thats whats so gross, its like wild animals trying to spread their seed to as many females as they can, we are not animals and this is real life and babies turn into kids and kids to teens and it is so much more than you are getting, your just so caught up in how you can have 11 babies in 20 years that you don’t think about what if along the way you have a miscarriage, a still birth, a retarded child, a child who has serious health issues, a wife who gets ill, cancer, etc. etc. you can’t plan your future like that, you live today and you don’t live for 20 years from now, your in a la la land. 😦
 
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Scott_Lafrance:
If I found out that a 40+ year old man were having a relationship with my teenage daughter, I would punish her, kick his rear end, and then examine where I, as a father, failed miserably to instill any common sense whatsoever in my children.
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Albert
http://pages.prodigy.net/rogerlori1/emoticons/slug.gifSomeones dad is not going to like your attitude!:tsktsk:
 
Lisa4Catholics,

When the girl turns 18 years old this year she becomes a legal adult and if she and I decide to get married then her parents can not do anything about it because she will be a legal adult.

Albert
 
Albert Kopsho:
Lisa4Catholics,

When the girl turns 18 years old this year she becomes a legal adult and if she and I decide to get married then her parents can not do anything about it because she will be a legal adult.

Albert
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You sound like a teen in rebellion:tsktsk: Her dad is going to chase you around like a littlehttp://pages.prodigy.net/indianahawkeye/newpage06/8.gifAnd it will be your own fault.:mad: When your young girlfreind finds out she is being used as a part of YOUR master plan to obtain YOUR life goals,do not be surprised if she leaves you:tsktsk: You need to check yourself Albert because you are wrong for this!:banghead:
 
Lisa4Catholics,

Are you stating that if someone is a legal adult that their parents can dictate to them who they can get married to?

Albert
 

Are you stating that if someone is a legal adult that their parents can dictate to them who they can get married to?​

Your “legal adult” is still a child, a “girl” as you call her. Again, Albert, please leave never land and grow up. It’s not that hard and you will be able to find someone closer to your age, say 25.
By the way does your fiance have internet access? Perhaps you should direct her to CA so she can see what motivates you to be with her.​

 
Albert Kopsho:
Lisa4Catholics,

Are you stating that if someone is a legal adult that their parents can dictate to them who they can get married to?

Albert
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No not at all I am just stating that the father does not cease to be the father when his little girl turns 18 and they generally do not appreciate this kind of thing:mad: They protect their children and the situation is wrong on so many levels ESPECIALLY your breeding plot for her! This whole thing is about your desires :banghead: Your Plans:nope: The girl just happens to be the requirement in YOUR blueprint:mad: In order to bring YOUR plans to fulfillment!
 
Lisa4Catholics, I am curious to know if the parents of this girl have met Albert and know his intentions.
 
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Lilyofthevalley:
Lisa4Catholics, I am curious to know if the parents of this girl have met Albert and know his intentions.
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I sincerely doubt it:( If they knew all this I doubt he would be healthy enough to type the post;) God Bless
PS The whole thing makes me sick! And man if I knew who the girl and the parents were I would direct them to this and the other thread so fast it would make his head swim:mad:
 
Lisa4Catholics,

When a girl turns 18 years old and if she wishes to get married her parents do not have any legal right to stop her from getting married. As for marriage and bearing children, the whole purpose of marriage is for procreation. That is why the Catholic Church does not allow the use of artificial contraception.

Albert
 
Albert Kopsho:
Lisa4Catholics,

When a girl turns 18 years old and if she wishes to get married her parents do not have any legal right to stop her from getting married. As for marriage and bearing children, the whole purpose of marriage is for procreation. That is why the Catholic Church does not allow the use of artificial contraception.

Albert
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Dearest Albert I have a large family and believe what the Church teaches.I object to your plot to use a human for your own plans! The methodical plot to procure a teen to fulfill your plot:tsktsk: Sadly you succeeded in doing so!That is not loving!:tsktsk:
 

I don’t know if there are many here other than me who would benefit from this, but I thought I’d start a forum for those people married or dating someone older or younger than them. My husband is much older than me. Although our families are extremly supportive of our marriage and always have been, I am sometimes frustrated by the reactions and snap judgements of those who do not know us very well​

My husband is considerably older than myself, however I did not date him as a TEENAGER or marry him right out of highschool.
Anyway, people make snap judgements all the time. I believe if you simply conduct yourself as a reasonable human being most people will refrain from judging you.
I know how you feel though. I always think people are probably thinking I am a homewreaker who broke up a marriage. That’s not the case, but you know older man younger woman, people think BIMBO who is a homewrecker.
Truthfully, if I had it to do over again, I would have choosen someone closer to my age. Of course my children would not be who they are so I would not want to change THAT aspect, but I would advise anyone to pick someone reasonably closer to their age. It’s a lot of difficulty.
 
Albert Kopsho:
Well of course love is the primary reason for marriage and having children is the secondary reason for marriage. But if a man who is 40 something years old gets married to a woman 40 years old they will never be able to have 10 children. So the man will have to marry a woman who is 20 or more years younger than the man in order to have 10 children.
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Your plan of having children into your 70s could backfire. My parents married when my mom was 19 and my dad was 22. They planned to have at least a half-dozen children. After seven years of marriage and surgery to remove mom’s uterine fibroid tumors they had me. They were never able to have another child and then my mom went into early menopause. Perhaps your wife will not be able to bear children, like my aunt, who got pregnant several times and always miscarried in the first or second trimester, and who (along with my uncle) eventually had to adopt to have children. Are you open to that? Then there are other health problems. You may develop prostate or testicular cancer (common in older men) and then your reproductive years would likely be over. Or you may die of a heart attack at 54, like my grandfather. She may develop pre-cancerous growths on her ovaries at a young age and need to have them removed before she even has the chance to bear children, like another of my aunts.

Even if you are both healthy and able to bear children, and even if you live into your 70s with excellent health (not something I would ever bet on), how many children you have and when you have them is up to God. My husband and I have been married nearly two years. No children and not even a pregnancy yet, and it’s not for lack of trying. Are you capable of loving your wife unconditionally even if she doesn’t start breeding on the wedding night according to your plans?

You may want 10 children. Certainly it is admirable to be open to a large family. Consider that it may not be God’s plan for you to have even one child, or for you to dictate this young woman’s life for her before she’s even old enough to legally decide for herself. Why exactly are you marrying this woman? If it is solely in an attempt to fulfill your desire for a large family, I’m amazed that her parents are even allowing you near her. I hope you truly know and love her for who she is and will become (and this is important considering that she is nowhere near done maturing and figuring out who she is as an adult), whether or not she is able to give you children.
 
My very best friend developed pre cancerous tumors and was only able to have two children and by the time she was 24 she had a full hysterectomy, there was no cancer in her family, this was just a freak thing that happens in life, life is full of what ifs, etc.
I wanted at least six children but am unbale to have any more after four children so now we are looking at adoption, I’m 31 years old, I’ve been healthy my whole life, did I expect this? Of course not. Life takes turns all the time that you never ever know, at 18 I too thought I would have as many children as God would allow, I was wrong, how could I know what the future would hold for me?
You can’t predict what the future will hold and you can’t base your life on “well, I know someone who did it like this” that is as crazy as saying, I know someone who jumped off a bridge and lived to tell about it so hey, I’ll jump off the bridge too and I’ll live too, that is how insane you sound Albert, you can pray and hope that God will provide you with children and you can be blessed if you have a few and be happy with them, you won’t know until you have a child how hard they can be to take care of, you take life one day at a time not look at the next 20 years, that is not living, not at all, that is really sad, live for right now, for today.
 
My husband is 12 and 1/2 years younger than me - and it works well. I was attracted to him, 16 years ago, at a friend’s house where we were all playing Trivial Pursuit. He was the only person there, besides me, who knew that Lee Harvey Oswald’s assassin, Jack Ruby, was the owner of a night club in Dallas. I was impressed then and it’s gone on from there…We watch the evening news together and discuss world events.
It’s not a “standard” relationship but it works for us and both our families are accepting. It probably helps that he fixes everyone’s cars! 😃
All these years later, we are still happy in each other’s company.
Before we had our marriage blessed (I’m a convert, hubby is not) the priest really drilled DH as to the future to be sure he understood the sacrament. DH was much impressed with the value The Church puts on marriage.
 
See, to me that is all fine and normal, you didn’t have some big plan laid out, my husband is 9 years older than me and I actually met him when I was 15 he was dating my friends older sister and I happened to be introduced to him that was all and then 3 years later we happened to meet up again and the rest is history but it was by no means planned and he did not having any agenda, like, Oh, I’m going to marry this girl at 18 and then in the next 20 years we’ll have this many kids and we’ll space them thus far apart, etc. etc. my husband didn’t even know if he wanted kids as he was youngest out of 11 and was so used to such a huge family he thought it would be nice to just have some quiet in our lives for awhile but our daughter came along and then 3 more children, none of whom were planned on also two pregnancies losses that were devestating for us, life just throws different curves and you go with them but as far as planning out 20 years in advance and saying “I will have it like this” good luck, just becuase a person knows someone that did it like that doesn’t mean you can have there life, each of us has our own life and really its all in Gods hands, we might be gone today or tomorrow, so just live in the now, in today and don’t worry about 20 years from now or you’ll not enjoy this moment and then you miss out on so much 👍
 
My husband is 7 years older than me. We are very happy and I don’t think there is anything wrong with dating older men/women. I started dating my husband when I was 19 and we got married right before I turned 21. We have now been 2 1/2 years. We have two wonderful children. Ages 2 and 5 months.

It was our plan to have at least 5 kids. But it seems Gods plan is for us to only have our 2 little miracles. Of course God can give me another miracle, but as of now my health doesn’t look like we are going to have any more.

After reading this thread I feel that everyone should pray for Albert.
Marriage is NOT just about having kids. What happens when you can’t have any more kids (or any at all in that matter)? Is the Church going to annule your marriage just because you can’t procreate? I don’t think so. If you knew anything about your faith at all, you would know that you are there to support your spouse for better or worse. You can’t just say you are only getting married to have kids. Kids are a blessing from God and we are called to raise them in the faith, yes. But in the attitude you seem to have, the only faith you will be showing them will not be the faith in God they need.
 
ust wanted to add my $.02. My wife and I have been married for 18 years and she’s 8 years my senior. We met when I was 25 and she was a young widow with two children. Never was a problem with us.
 
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