16 Yr old daughter is sexually active

  • Thread starter Thread starter Tbrightson
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
T

Tbrightson

Guest
And is taking xanax. So what to do?

My wife has been raising the kids a lot more liberally than I would like. “I give them freedom so they can experience the world” …:roll_eyes:

I am complete opposite in attitude- a lot more strict in who what and where they are doing. -I could go on and on about that…but I digress…these events have not surprised me in the latest. My thought to my wifes “experienceing the world” remark was “Yeah they are going to experience the world alright” My way of approaching parenting was rejected to the point of them leaving me for a time. So I was relegated to just watching the carnage unfold…Thankfully the other two teenagers seem to be doing ok. It was one of them that tipped us off about the situation and I thanked her for that.

So I debate to what to do…she has a part time job. Has a car to get her to work.

My wifes suggestion is to “watch her very carefully and make sure she is home by midnight”

Ugh!

My thoughts:

Gyn exam.

Get drug counseling.

Subject to weekly drug test. If fail - no car use to go to work

Strict curfew. (she was lying about where what she was going)
No going to so and so house as she was lying as to where/what she was really doing

Not sure what to do about the boy issue.

But just really p-eed off at my wife…I saw this coming from a mile away…there were troubling signs…but no discipline…but what I thought in regards to parenting/discipline meant nothing…Wondered if I was best to just separate so that when they are with me they followed my rules.

But I know that what is important right now is not recriminations but getting my daughter back on track.

Thoughts and prayers appreciated
 
where is she getting the xannies? off the street? there’s a lot of fake xans out there, knew of people who died from fake ones
 
Last edited:
Not sure yet…just found out today, she is at work and doesnt have to be home till midnight. Wont be able to have a sit down until tomorrow. She has talked about wanting to try other things like speed/lsd
 
as a person who’s done a lot of speed and lsd and xans, i can tell you that it’ll end up with her in the hospital. and the lsd at that age WILL lead to long lasting depression or other mental health problems

i think if i were a parent she wouldn’t have a phone, a job, a car, and would be drug tested every week. and she’d have to go to therapy and i’d probably make her switch schools too. she needs to be completely removed from that environment.

and she’s probably already done speed. xans are usually not done by themselves, they’re done to come down off of another drug which has an adverse effect
 
Last edited:
Should say she did try suicide few years back by taking ambien…was as she claimed becasue of a poisonious friendship at school. She seemed quite embarresed by it; With that in her background I am treading cautiously.
 
yeah, she needs counseling man. recreational drug use is almost 100% the result of someone who is unhappy with their life and is seeking to self medicate their problems

it WILL lead to long lasting negative effects which take years to overcome. I’m saying this from personal experience
 
Last edited:
The divide is cavernous. As far as I can tell I am only the biweekly ATM.
…
 
pushing psychiatric drugs on a teen that is already abusing them isn’t the answer. all it takes is her saying she can’t focus and she can get speed too
 
I think the divide between my wife and myself has contributed to the problem quite frankly.
 
You and your wife have to present a united front or else your daughter will divide you even more. I would suggest counseling for you and your wife to communicate better and become more united in your parenting style.

The comment about wanting to try other drugs is very unsettling. You should be willing and able to drug test her at your convenience, and your daughter should know you will do so randomly. And if your daughter is taking Xanax she needs counseling of her own.

Her car use needs to be limited until she can be proven trustworthy in all areas of her life. She needs to earn the right to use the car.

Is she saving money from this job or spending it on herself? Does she have her own car and pay her own insurance? If no, car use needs to be cut way back.
 
Her issues need addressed by a professional. Start with a Psychologist then! However, once a diagnosis is made, medication will probably be necessary.
 
i don’t know the situation. i just don’t think it’s a very wise thing to medicate a 16 year old who has taken enough pills to kill herself.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top