C
chicago
Guest
St. Louis…hmmmm…only a short train ride away!I’m HERE I’m HERE…
32/f VERY Catholic
4 Us Single Men: Having problems finding an orthodox (serious) Catholic woman?
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Bartek
Guest
Dear Frank.
Firts - I will pray for You. I think it is not good idea to date/marry some non-catholic woman and eventually convert her to Catholicism. I was in that kind of relationship and i had that intention. There was all right at the begining. I was sure, that she is the gift from Jesus for me. I loved her like no one in my all life before. I was ready to give her all my life. And i want to believe, that in that momen she did fill the same to me. She wanted to talk with me about my religion, was with me in my church. But in her heart there was no agreement to accept all rules of Catholicism. One day she wanted have sex with me. I refused. She realised that i didn’t love her enough. I don’t judge her, she just understud the love like that. And was deep hurted by other men before. But it was the beginning of the end.
After two years we finaly both understud, that we are just two adult persons, who chosen two totaly different ways of life. And it was over. Frank, do not my mistake, please, your life is too short to waste it and to long to hurt your self.
Firts - I will pray for You. I think it is not good idea to date/marry some non-catholic woman and eventually convert her to Catholicism. I was in that kind of relationship and i had that intention. There was all right at the begining. I was sure, that she is the gift from Jesus for me. I loved her like no one in my all life before. I was ready to give her all my life. And i want to believe, that in that momen she did fill the same to me. She wanted to talk with me about my religion, was with me in my church. But in her heart there was no agreement to accept all rules of Catholicism. One day she wanted have sex with me. I refused. She realised that i didn’t love her enough. I don’t judge her, she just understud the love like that. And was deep hurted by other men before. But it was the beginning of the end.
After two years we finaly both understud, that we are just two adult persons, who chosen two totaly different ways of life. And it was over. Frank, do not my mistake, please, your life is too short to waste it and to long to hurt your self.
A
abb
Guest
Met my current girlfriend in RCIA class, I think I’m just blessed.
Andrew
Andrew
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mapleoak
Guest
My fiancee is non-demoninational and is now enrolling in RCIA. I won’t take credit for that though. I agree that belongs to the Holy Ghost.Preach, Preach!
I say find a non-Catholic, and convert her…she’ll love you all the more for saving her soul
I would say don’t try to hard, but pray that God will show what His intentions are and be ready to humbly accept, even if that means staying single. I have heard lots of good things about Catholic singles sites as well as lots of bad things. I know personally someone very close who was burnt pretty bad by one of these sites. For me, I have always avoided such things. It seems to put more of ‘shopping mall’ analogy into something that I think deserves much more reverence.
In Christ - J.M.J.
J
jc-servant
Guest
I would say to keep an open mind about the package your future spouse might appear in.
I’m a happy, kind, athletic, employed, orthodox Catholic woman who has been found attractive by many men (so I know that I’m not freakishly hideous). I’m on Ave Maria and I have been rejected by men my own age who are looking for women 10 or more years younger than themselves for whatever reason. Most of them have said it is because they “want children” but God does not promise children to a woman of any age so I suspect there may be a bit more behind their thinking than children. I know that it is discouraging to singles to look for a long time and not find that one “right” person. I now have the problem of some men thinking that I’m a “career woman” by choice when in fact I have just been looking for my husband for many years.
I know quite a few orthodox Catholic men and women (more women than men) just through my parish. Being active in the parish has allowed me to meet many 100’s of people in just a few years. I’ve been involved in our teen ministry (lots of on fire single adults involved), RCIA, choir, Fine Arts, Carnival, EMHC, Bible study and only briefly our actual singles group. I met more eligible singles in the other organizations and ministries than in the singles group. I have let friends from each group know that I’m looking for my future husband and I keep an eye out for other singles in case someone is not right for me.
My biggest tip for anyone is to let other orthodox Catholics including your priest know that you are looking for your future spouse! I even asked a priest who visited for about 6 months if he had any single brothers. He thought it was great that I actually asked. (My rationale was that any large Catholic family that produced two great priests might have produced some good single men who had marriage as their vocation.)
I’m a happy, kind, athletic, employed, orthodox Catholic woman who has been found attractive by many men (so I know that I’m not freakishly hideous). I’m on Ave Maria and I have been rejected by men my own age who are looking for women 10 or more years younger than themselves for whatever reason. Most of them have said it is because they “want children” but God does not promise children to a woman of any age so I suspect there may be a bit more behind their thinking than children. I know that it is discouraging to singles to look for a long time and not find that one “right” person. I now have the problem of some men thinking that I’m a “career woman” by choice when in fact I have just been looking for my husband for many years.
I know quite a few orthodox Catholic men and women (more women than men) just through my parish. Being active in the parish has allowed me to meet many 100’s of people in just a few years. I’ve been involved in our teen ministry (lots of on fire single adults involved), RCIA, choir, Fine Arts, Carnival, EMHC, Bible study and only briefly our actual singles group. I met more eligible singles in the other organizations and ministries than in the singles group. I have let friends from each group know that I’m looking for my future husband and I keep an eye out for other singles in case someone is not right for me.
My biggest tip for anyone is to let other orthodox Catholics including your priest know that you are looking for your future spouse! I even asked a priest who visited for about 6 months if he had any single brothers. He thought it was great that I actually asked. (My rationale was that any large Catholic family that produced two great priests might have produced some good single men who had marriage as their vocation.)
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Alison
Guest
:banghead: Why won’t my sisters get it! Some women need a lot of spiritual help.
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FiremanFrank
Guest
Beleive me Alison …
Today, it seems NOBODY is “getting it”.
And not only are many people not getting it, they are outright abusive if they even receive the slightest hint of God’s teachings.
It’s becoming a nasty world out there.
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FiremanFrank
Guest
Well everybody, thanks for your replies!
But take a look at the responses. They vary a great deal in their opinions, sometimes even completely opposing one another.
Do this, but don’t do that.
Do that, but don’t do this.
Oh well …
But take a look at the responses. They vary a great deal in their opinions, sometimes even completely opposing one another.
Do this, but don’t do that.
Do that, but don’t do this.
Oh well …
P
Philena
Guest
I’m an orthodox, Bible-Believing, God-loving, Rosary praying, Pope-admiring, devout Catholic. And I’m single. Want my email address?
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FiremanFrank
Guest
Philena and chicago:
I live in N.Y state.
And from what I understand, both of you live quite a distance from myself.
Too far for anything serious to develop …
I live in N.Y state.
And from what I understand, both of you live quite a distance from myself.
Too far for anything serious to develop …
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agapewolf
Guest
Dude,
Chicago is a dude. perhaps you meant me?
and by the way, I know people that meet over long distances all the time and things work out. You should look at the successes on the different catholic single sites.
Chicago is a dude. perhaps you meant me?
and by the way, I know people that meet over long distances all the time and things work out. You should look at the successes on the different catholic single sites.
C
chicago
Guest
But I’m flatterred nonetheless. And to think, I wasn’t even wearing makeup!
S
Sierrah
Guest
If it’s any consolation I’ve had the opposite problem. 
Most of the guys I’ve seen want one thing and when they find out they’re not going to get it then their true nature comes out. Believe me I know there’s nice guys out there but they seem almost impossible to find. 
Especially in the 30-44 age range. In any case I suggest lots of prayer and rethinking priorities. Let God lead you to the right person. Stop worrying so much. If it’s meant to be you’ll find her.
Most of the guys I’ve seen want one thing and when they find out they’re not going to get it then their true nature comes out. Believe me I know there’s nice guys out there but they seem almost impossible to find. Especially in the 30-44 age range. In any case I suggest lots of prayer and rethinking priorities. Let God lead you to the right person. Stop worrying so much. If it’s meant to be you’ll find her.
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FiremanFrank
Guest
For some unknown reason, you seem to have misinterpreted my intentions.Let God lead you to the right person. Stop worrying so much. If it’s meant to be you’ll find her.
I said I was having difficulty in finding an orthodox Catholic woman.
Wasn’t worrying about it one bit though.
Maybe that’ll clear things up a bit …
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FiremanFrank
Guest
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FiremanFrank
Guest
Dudette,
Ummm, yeah. I was kindly referring to yourself …
I’m sure there are instances of that happening, just it makes everything that much more difficult is all.
K
kevinsgirl
Guest
I met my fiance on Ave Maria…and he’s a wonderful man…God had to have picked him out because he’s perfect for me.
But I had to give God a chance to let me meet him.
For one, I joined AMS because I knew I needed to open more doors to find my future spouse.
Secondly, I was on and off AMS for a good 3 years…and when my fiance wrote to me (after having been on there for less than a year) he was at the point of giving up on AMS. You have to open the doors…and then wait for God’s time.
Thirdly, he lived on the West Coast and I lived in the Deep South…we didn’t let distance be a barrier to getting to know each other and, ultimately, falling in love. He generously offered to move so that we could pursue our relationship further…and he tells me that is something he has never regretted.
So, Frank, maybe God just wants you to wait a little longer and be more open to where your spouse may come from. Morals–no–you can’t compromise on that. But distance–if you truly want to be open to God’s plan for you–well, you can definitely compromise there.
God bless,
kevinsgirl
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FiremanFrank
Guest
K
kevinsgirl
Guest
Honestly, I’d rather be living thousands of miles from my hometown with my fiance than living here without him. It may seem a stretch, but when you find the person God intends for you, it’ll all become clear. 
L
LuciaMarie
Guest
Hi Frank,
I thought I’d share a little bit about my own story.
I met my current boyfriend Catholic Spring Break Service Trip in college. When we met he was a much more Orthodox Catholic than I, although I considered myself an active practicing Catholic. I went to Mass weekly but had not been to confession in years and barely knew how to pray the rosary.
The greatest gift he has given to me is his patience and respect in regards to my faith. He never directly pressured me to change but through his excellent example and the work of the Holy Sprit I felt called to renew my faith and become closer to God. I now attend daily Mass and my boyfriend and I pray the rosary together at least 3 times a week (over the phone since we are currently living long distance). He went with me to my first confession in years and was a source of tremendous support for me. Our relationship has grown much stronger since we began to share these things with each other. I am afraid to think of where I would have been without his example.
So, I guess my advice is to patiently let God lead you to the right woman and to not pre-judge her because she may not be perfect when you find her. God may be calling you inspire someone just as my boyfriend inspired me.
I thought I’d share a little bit about my own story.
I met my current boyfriend Catholic Spring Break Service Trip in college. When we met he was a much more Orthodox Catholic than I, although I considered myself an active practicing Catholic. I went to Mass weekly but had not been to confession in years and barely knew how to pray the rosary.
The greatest gift he has given to me is his patience and respect in regards to my faith. He never directly pressured me to change but through his excellent example and the work of the Holy Sprit I felt called to renew my faith and become closer to God. I now attend daily Mass and my boyfriend and I pray the rosary together at least 3 times a week (over the phone since we are currently living long distance). He went with me to my first confession in years and was a source of tremendous support for me. Our relationship has grown much stronger since we began to share these things with each other. I am afraid to think of where I would have been without his example.
So, I guess my advice is to patiently let God lead you to the right woman and to not pre-judge her because she may not be perfect when you find her. God may be calling you inspire someone just as my boyfriend inspired me.
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